Come morning, Ezekiel was greeted by a somber atmosphere as he exited his tent.
He remembered everything that had happened the day before. The emotions, the panic, the various sensations that brought him low in front of Gerome and the rest of the team he’d grown close to.
At first, he thought that it was just a one-time thing. That he wouldn’t have to worry about what had happened, as he would be able to get over it like he always did.
His talk with Tracy, Filia, and Gerome, before they set out for the border of the Desolate Lands made it clear that that wasn’t actually the case.
As Tracy and Filia explained things to him, Ezekiel grew more and more weary, but at the same time he couldn’t say anything that would dispute what he was being told.
As he reflected on it, he realized that the information regarding Elemental Emotional Instability made a great deal of sense, even if one took into account his reincarnation.
He was a university student in his past life. He had no reason, at all, to have any sort of emotional or military training for dealing with battles or traumatic events like near death experiences, bombs going off in close proximity, and fighting nightmarish creatures straight out of a zombie horror.
As Gerome said, full grown adults who were trained for that kind of stuff would sometimes freeze up during their first encounters with the Cruor. Let alone someone like Ezekiel, who, whilst very mature, was also very inexperienced with such terrifying creatures.
Just thinking about the Rot from the day before caused him to freeze up as chills ran up and down his spine. His eyes darted back and forth as he looked for any threats, seemingly without his notice.
Void mana was channeled, and Ezekiel’s eyes took on their black ringed white iris appearance.
He felt his attention to detail improve as his awareness expanded.
The emotions started to leave him as his mana enhanced everything that wasn’t the negative emotions he was feeling at that moment.
“Ezekiel.”
Gerome’s voice grabbed Ezekiel’s attention as he turned to the old man who was in charge of his protection. A heavy hand was placed on Ezekiel’s shoulder, but the weight was not uncomfortable.
“You’re not there, Ezekiel. You’re safe now. The Cruor are not a threat to you right now.”
Ezekiel slowly untensed his body as he tried to relax, Gerome removed his hands as he did. Ezekiel knew in his mind that he couldn’t allow himself to maintain this state, as it could affect his personality in a more permanent manner, according to what Tracy and Filia had told him.
As he purposefully cut the flow of his mana, this time suppressing it to his core, rather than letting it sit freely, he was immediately bombarded by the fear and panic he’d felt when Tracy and Filia finished their explanation.
He did not immediately start panicking, however, as the various Spirits from the team had come in to help him, and the aid of several emotional support animals kept him calm, as did the focus of suppressing his mana.
“I really hope that I won’t have to do this forever.” He said as he started to grow weary after several minutes of suppressing his mana.
“Unfortunately, you’d best try to keep that up for at least a day. I can’t tell how long your emotions have been suppressed, or put to the wayside, but if it’s been more than a day, then you need to get used to properly feeling your emotions in full once again.”
As Tracy said this, Ezekiel grimaced because he nearly started crying from the guilt that he now felt at causing trouble for his team.
“Don’t try to bottle it in. If you do, you’ll subconsciously start to use your mana to avoid those emotions again.”
Ezekiel felt incredibly embarrassed by this, which worsened his condition, but he heeded Tracy and Filia’s words, allowing his tears to fall as he started bawling.
It was not the fearful panic attack crying from the night before, this was just simple crying over the situation he was in.
As Tracy and Filia held the ten-year-old Void Mage between them, Gerome left the tent, a heavy sense of guilt weighing on his mind.
As he and the rest of the Wandering Titan’s Hunters packed up for the rest of their journey, he couldn’t help but think about where things had started going wrong.
Were he and the other Guilds too hasty in how quickly they jumped on getting the young genius Void Mage to join their expedition?
Given everything that had happened, he couldn’t help but think they were. Perhaps they should’ve just done what the Reaching spires had and found an adult Void Mage to volunteer.
Such a person would be compensated and protected, of course. The Titans weren’t monsters. They wouldn’t drag a civilian into dangerous territory and just kill him off like the Spires had. Hell, if the Mage in question was in a tough spot, they might’ve let him stay on as a porter or paper-pusher in their headquarters.
Eventually, Gerome realized that these thoughts were not conducive to being in charge of a Guild expedition. Especially one where they were retreating as fast as possible.
Returning to the tent to have Tracy and Filia start packing up, he was at least happy to see that Ezekiel had stopped crying, and that he seemed to be letting out his emotions properly again.
Seeing Ezekiel look down in guilt like a child having been caught after breaking something valuable, when he was in no way to blame for what had happened, did dampen his mood somewhat. He didn’t let it show, however, as he knew that that wouldn’t help Ezekiel in this instance.
For now, nothing more was said as the party finished packing up and headed out with the rest of the Guild at top speed to the border.
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Even at their top speed. It still took roughly another two days to get to the edge of the Desolate Lands. Far less time than what they had spent there when they were headed to the Ruins.
During this time, the Guilds had been forced to fight several large groups of Umbral Beasts as many had been attracted to the explosion that had occurred a few days prior.
Most of them were dealt with quickly, but due to the unfortunate possibility of the Spires and Cult of Light trying to ambush them again, Gerome and Trissy were forced to stay out of the fighting, for the most part.
Luckily the Tier threes seemed to be more than enough for these groups, as they mostly consisted of Tier two and Tier one Umbral Beasts.
Ezekiel had also finally stabilized his emotional state. Tracy and Filia assumed that the quick speed was due to the fact that it primarily originated from s single day worth of events, rather than the possibility that it had been going on for several weeks or more.
Of course, Ezekiel knew that it was mainly because he was, in fact, much more mature, emotionally, due to his reincarnation. But considering he didn’t know how long he’d been enhancing his focus, he wasn’t going to argue the point with either of them, as they could just as likely be right in their assumptions.
As the Guilds finally reached the border, they did not stop, but rather they kept going at full speed for the rest of the day, having left the Desolate Lands near noon.
This was done with the intent of getting as close to the outpost, and as far from the Ruins, as they possibly could, as neither of the Guilds wanted to be stuck fighting teams of actual Cruor, given that they were certain to have been drawn to the crater that was once the Senera city Ruins.
The only thing that was still nagging at the back of Ezekiel’s head was the fact that he could tell that something was wrong whenever he spoke with Gerome.
He couldn’t tell what it was, but there was just a feeling, like the old man was putting on a mask.
Finally, as they made camp outside the Desolate Lands, Ezekiel found a chance to confront Gerome regarding his thoughts, just as the party was splitting up to go to sleep.
“We nearly got a child killed, in what should have been a relatively safe expedition.”
Gerome said simply, as he saw no reason to lie when Ezekiel asked his question. Westly had crawled up to Gerome’s head and was nuzzling into the old man’s fur as he spoke.
“The fact of the matter is, expeditions go wrong all the time, like the first expedition to those Ruins. But everyone that works as a Hunter knows the risks and has willingly taken up the blade to explore and fight back against the Desolate Lands and the Cruor.”
“You have not, and I can’t help but be certain that taking you with us was the wrong choice. I should not have insisted that you come, even with the guarantees and gold given to your family.”
“I thought I’d have to protect you from a few overly zealous Hunters that wanted whatever treasure you managed to find, not be forced to help in nearly wiping out the Hunters from another Guild because they broke one of humanities Guild Laws just to kill you. Let alone accidentally force you to encounter the Rot, in one of their Den at that!”
Ezekiel immediately shivered as he tensed up momentarily at the mention of the Rot, but he took several deep breaths, suppressed his mana to ensure that it didn’t affect him, and calmed down quickly as Gerome watched him.
“See. My insistence has resulted in a child obtaining a trauma that may take years to overcome.”
Ezekiel highly doubted that it would actually take years to get over this, especially given that he knew he couldn’t allow it to take years to get over, since he planned on becoming a Hunter as soon as possible. There were still too many mysteries that he needed to unravel to allow himself to be held back.
For now though, he was silent as he pondered Gerome’s words. He immediately felt guilty again, as he thought that there was more he should’ve been able to do.
However, he immediately dashed those thoughts away, as he knew that there wasn’t any more he could do. He was the weakest person in this expedition. He could barely fight a Tier two on even footing when they were taking him seriously, let alone a Tier two Hunter and their Spirit.
He knew that emphasizing his weakness wouldn’t be helpful, however, so he didn’t bring that up.
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“How do you know I would be better off back at Harkem?” Choosing to bring up possibilities that would hopefully show Gerome the good things that had happened from this expedition.
“How do you know that the Spires wouldn’t have gotten outside help anyways? How do you know that you would’ve been able to find those traitors before you fought with the Spires and the Cult? How do you know that nothing’s happening in Harkem that couldn’t be a threat to my life?”
“How do you know that the Rot wouldn’t have escaped, if I hadn’t been the one to do what I did? I know it was just by chance that I’d managed to find the safe path, rather than the path that led to the... ‘shudder’ ... Rot beneath the Temple ruins?”
Gerome didn’t have anything to say as Ezekiel argued his case. He wanted to continue arguing that a child shouldn’t be out here, and that it was a mistake to bring Ezekiel with them, but he found Ezekiel’s maturity once again surprising him.
Ezekiel saw that Gerome wasn’t responding, so he continued on.
“Yes, things could’ve gone better, but given the number of external forces that were influencing the situation, I think you did a fairly good job. Mistakes were made, and yes, I will be haunted by what I saw in the... Den... for a while yet, but I’m alive, and that means that I can keep living and can recover from what happened, so we need to focus on that, first and foremost.”
Once again, Gerome couldn’t say anything as Ezekiel finished speaking.
Suddenly, he had thought that made him chuckle, despite the seriousness of the situation.
“Heh. You know, kid, you’ve just reminded me of why I thought it was a good idea to bring you on this expedition.”
Ezekiel perked his head to the side in curiosity.
“You’re not a normal kid. You’re mature enough to make some of my Hunters look like children. I had basically forgotten that you are still just a kid, at least until you had your break down.”
Ezekiel blushed slightly at the reminder of what had happened a few days ago.
“You nearly made me forget about it again just now. I’ll need to be careful about that in the future.”
Ezekiel looked slightly indignant as Gerome said this.
“It’s not like I’m just pretending when I act like this, you know.” He said as Gerome just chuckled once again.
“That’s the scary part. That means you really are this mature, but you’re inexperienced. You know a lot of things, but you’re still weak, and that’s not an insult. Even though you’ve dropped a Step in your Tier, you’re good for a child your age, but you’re still a child, and you’re still only Tier one. There’s a reason we usually only take Hunters at Tier two into the Desolate Lands.”
Gerome’s tone spoke volumes regarding how he felt about the situation.
Ezekiel felt annoyed that he hadn’t been able to relieve Gerome of all his worries but was content to know that the chuckles he had elicited were more real than Gerome’s previous expressions.
“Then I guess that means that I’ll just have to get stronger, doesn’t it?”
This time Gerome let out an actual laugh, leaning backwards in his seat as he nearly threw Westly off his head.
“That’s right, you will. You need to pay me back for all the losses we suffered after all.”
“What!?” Ezekiel squawked indignantly. “You’re the one who made the deal!”
“Yes, but you’re the one that they were after.”
Ezekiel couldn’t refute that, so he just sat to the side and pouted like the ten-year-old he was.
“It’s not my fault they’re all assholes who need to get put down.”
Gerome just chuckled again. “Indeed, they are.”
The two of them fell into silence once again. The mood is still heavy, but no longer as forced as it once was. Gerome still felt guilty, and Ezekiel in turn felt guilty for causing it.
“It was still my choice, you know that, right? Mine, and the Roaring Ruins for threatening my family with ridiculous charges. If anything, you offered me and my family a way out of a no-win situation.”
Gerome didn’t say anything as he stood up, heading to his tent to get ready for bed.
“Perhaps we should just take this as a lesson for all of us. A lesson regarding the consequences of our actions.”
“... sure.”
Ezekiel didn’t know what else to say. He thought knew what Gerome was trying to tell him. That they both did things that they regretted, and that they both needed to learn from what had happened.
It was just a shame that the only thing Ezekiel could focus on was the fact that he had learned just how weak he really was in this vast new world, and that the thing he needed to do right now, was get as strong as he could, as fast as he could.
----------------------------------------
With the now slowed pace of the Guild’s Hunters allowing them to rest a little bit, Ezekiel found himself under a certain amount of scrutiny by the majority of the Hunters from both Guilds.
It hadn’t been that bad when they were traveling through the Desolate Lands, as there wasn’t much that could be done besides taking watch and running as fast as possible. But after leaving the Desolate Lands, and reentering the Erenon forest, there was the chance to release one's frustration, if not violently, then verbally at least.
“There he is. The brat that destroyed the Ruins.”
“I’m surprised no one else died because of him.”
“We already lost how many Hunters because of him?”
“He was the reason the Spires attacked us, right?”
“I wonder what the Guild Leader sees in him.”
“Shame we can’t just leave him behind.”
“Once we get to the city again, he’s free game, right?”
For the most part, Ezekiel was able to avoid the troubles that came with the various rumors being spread regarding him. There were some people, his team and a few others from the Titans, that didn’t listen to the rumors going on. But given that certain information was not revealed, it was difficult to dispute the fact that Ezekiel was indirectly responsible for the destruction of the Ruins.
The lack of information regarding the Rot Den was the most frustrating thing, however, as there was doubt and disbelief from the Roaring Ruins Guild due to the fact that Trissy denied any rumors relating to its existence.
“We don’t want the fact that Void Mage’s might be immune to the Rot spores getting out just yet. For all we know you were purified when you accessed the Core. Until this can be tested, if it even can be, there’s no reason to spread false hope.”
Trissy’s opinion was a source of conflict between herself and Gerome, but the fact that they had fought together, and the Titans had turned over a massive amount of riches over, while they got nothing, was enough to keep things civil, for the most part.
Ezekiel and his team, on the other hand, mainly stuck close to Gerome, and tried their best to not draw attention to themselves.
The Captains were all informed of the full story, but they were in the minority, and were also bound to secrecy, so while they weren’t a problem, they weren’t much help either.
This was because many of the Tier twos that had a problem with Ezekiel also had a problem with the team that he spent the most time with. Worse yet, unlike Ezekiel, this team didn’t have the protection of a Tier four Guild leader.
Luckily, fighting amongst one’s own Guild was frowned upon. Especially in a Guild that was as close knit as the Wandering Titans, but that didn’t stop rumors from spreading about Herend, Tracy, and the rest.
“I can’t believe those jerks!”
Tracy called out after returning from patching up several Hunters after the Guilds had stopped to rest for the evening. The day of travel had been slow going but had also resulted in two separate attacks by Umbral beasts.
The Roaring Ruins did little beyond defending their own people from the attack, but the Titans had actively fought the Umbral beasts in the hopes of making up some of their losses from this expedition.
They’d be lucky if they broke even by taking twice as long to travel and fought twice as much as they already were.
As it was, the slowed pace meant that they were going to take an extra day or so to reach the Turnbout before crossing to the primary outpost.
Ezekiel paused in his training as he turned to look at Tracy. He thought knew what had likely happened, but because he felt it was his fault he moved to try and help all the same.
“What happened?” Ezekiel asked cautiously.
Tracy barely seemed to hear him and didn’t answer until Filia came over and started rubbing her back gently. Philip, Herend, and Nathanus also gathered around, whilst Gerome had gone off to make a count of the different things they’d managed to gather from the most recent attack.
“It’s just a bunch of jerks that would apparently walk around with broken or sprained limbs than receive any healing from ‘someone like me’.” Tracy said as her tone went from angry and loud to quiet and subdued.
“They didn’t put in such words, of course. Saying things like, ‘don’t you have to protect the kid?’ or ‘I wouldn’t want to take away your precious mana when you’ve got the Void Mage to take care of.” and other things like that!”
“It’s like they don’t think I realize that their words are just a polite way of saying they don’t want my help because they don’t like Ezekiel.”
At this point, Ezekiel couldn’t help but flinch, and force down his mana as his own frustrations came to the forefront. Instead of reacting too extremely, however, he just looked to the ground and kicked up some dust.
“Ah! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to... you know...” Tracy said as she realized who she was talking to.
“It’s okay. I’m sorry you guys are being treated differently because of me.”
Ezekiel meant it too. He knew full well what it was like to be ostracized because he was a Void Mage. He considered himself incredibly lucky to have a loving family and friends that were willing to stand by him when needed.
That didn’t mean that the looks from some of the store owners, or people he’d see in the streets, when they realized he was a Void Mage, didn’t hurt sometimes. But this was just more of a reason to not want the people close to him to suffer the same fate.
“It’s not your fault, Ezekiel. We know the truth, and they don’t. It’s unfortunate, but maybe when we get back to Harkem the Church of Ten will be able to run some tests. That way we can spread the news about the Rot Den, and the reason the Ruins were destroyed.”
This time it was Herend that spoke up, and his words were met with nods of agreement from everyone in the party.
“I hope so. I feel like there were a lot of things that were learned on this expedition. Not just about the Ruins and the Spires, or their Cult ties.”
Ezekiel couldn’t help but glance down at the sword in his hands as he said this. The nascent Spirit was still at least a couple of weeks away from forming a consciousness that would allow it to bond with Ezekiel.
He knew it wouldn’t form until a while after he got home, but he wanted to meet the Spirit that would be his partner as soon as possible.
He also wanted to get his hands on a new sword, given that it would be strange if he stopped using this one, but it was also basically impossible for him to even draw it at this point.
Even when practicing, he needed to keep the blade in its sheath, else people would notice the incredible changes that had occurred to it.
The others, when they saw Ezekiel glance at his sword, thought that he was upset with himself that he wasn’t stronger, or that perhaps he had damaged the blade and was frustrated at breaking a useful gift.
They had all agreed to take up the issue regarding the sabotaged ball bearings with Merlot when they got back. Church Acolyte status be damned.
Before the conversation could go any further, however, Gerome approached, with a solemn look on his face as he greeted Ezekiel and the rest. On his shoulder sat a plump pigeon looking bird that they could all tell was a Spirit due to its red plumage and small sparks of fire that were wafting off of it every now and then. It looked exhausted.
“Sorry folks, but it looks like we won’t be able to take our time getting back after all. Pack up, we need to get moving. If we move fast, we can get to the river before the sun fully sets.”
Gerome’s words stunned everyone, but as they listened closely, it sounded like there was a bit of a ruckus going on in the other parts of the camp.
“What’s going on, sir?” Herend asked as the rest all got up and started packing again.
A dark look crossed Gerome’s face as he looked at the group.
“It seems like a conflict broke out in Harkem a week or so ago. Duke Harkem is calling all Guilds back from the expedition to finish taking control of the city back from his brother, as well as to clean up any remaining undesirables, who had previously denounced the Duke. The Count had been supported by several unknown Tier fours, as well as the Reaching Spires and their allied Guilds.”
‘Clang’
Ezekiel dropped his sword in shock. He had known that there were a number of things going on behind the scenes in the city, but he hadn’t thought that they’d reached such a boiling point already.
“Sir... are my... is my...?” Ezekiel could barely think as he began worrying about his family.
He knew that, as the main target of the Church of Light, there was a possibility that his family would be in danger.
“I’m sorry Ezekiel, this letter came from the Duke himself, and was delivered by one of his Tier four aides’ Spirit. It seems like the conflict is finished now, and we’re being called back to settle things properly, but I just don’t know much more than that.”
Gerome’s tone was gentle as he addressed Ezekiel’s unasked question.
“... I understand.” Ezekiel said in a morose tone of Voice.
Gerome just nodded his head in approval as Ezekiel packed up the few things he’d taken out for their rest in the camp. He was finished before everyone else due to the lack of items he had.
“Ezekiel, you’re with me again. The rest of you meet up with Garrad, he’ll be taking you all on Brucey. I need to go ahead to try and meet with military forces stationed at the outpost. If we get there fast enough, we should be able to catch the last emergency boat crossing the Turnbout.”
“Yes sir!”
The group nodded as they headed off to meet with Garrad.
Gerome picked up Ezekiel and dashed over to where Westly was waiting.
The ferret wasn’t in his full size but seemed to be more streamlined than usual. Trissy was also there with her feline Spirit. She nodded at Gerome and gave Ezekiel a questioning glance.
“I’m of no use to Duke Harken if my ward dies and my Spirit Bond is severed.” Gerome explained curtly as he and Ezekiel climbed onto Westly’s back. “He stays with me until I get him safely returned to one of the Scholars at the Cathedral who were designated as trustworthy by his parents.”
Trissy just nodded in indifference, as she recognized that this was not her problem.
“Hold tight, Ezekiel. We’ll be moving a bit faster than you’re used to.”
With those words said, Ezekiel grabbed on as tightly as he could, but he still needed to rely on Gerome as Westly dashed forward, so fast that Ezekiel could barely keep his eyes open, and the forest around them turned into a blur of colors he could barely make out.
Holding on for dear life, Ezekiel couldn’t help but feel rueful as he realized that he had apparently left one battlefield for another, and this time he couldn’t just have it blown up to keep things safe.