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Taken & Given
4.1 - Julia

4.1 - Julia

Fat snowflakes drifted on the wind, slowly covering Tulingii in another layer of ice and snow. The last of the townsfolk had left for the winter, dispersed to their farms and hunting grounds, leaving the town quiet, cold and vacant. But on top of the hill, things could not have been more different.

Inside the great-hall, the fires in the stone hearths continued to burn, flooding the rooms and corridors with warmth. The king’s household, the Blood Sworn and their families had remained. Servants and slaves rushed back and forth, rearranging the heavy wooden furniture as they cleaned every available room. Julia looked on in confusion, dodging and side-stepping the other servants as she made her way towards Saxa’s room.

As she reached the familiar wooden door, Julia raised a hand to knock, then hesitated. Two weeks had passed since she’d last seen Saxa in Siegfried’s room. The girl would have questions, questions Julia wasn’t ready to answer. Raimund and Raban’s lie about the flux had bought time for her to heal, but none of it changed the simple fact of what she’d done. And now the time had come. Ready or not, she would have to face Saxa and her inevitable questions.

Should I just tell her the truth? Maybe she’ll understand? The idea sounded ridiculous even as she thought it. She was stalling, and trying to stall some more, when the door flew open.

“How long are you going to stand there? You have an entire week of clothes to wash!” Saxa’s glare seemed false, a facade of angry impatience, but Julia didn’t care. She took her in a tight hug, nearly smothering the girl. She felt Saxa’s arms go around her return, and suddenly it hit her. Returning here had never felt so good. Julia barely managed to conceal her tears as she let go.

“You know better than to get sick.” Saxa complained, still forcing an angry look, but Julia could see the emotions bubbling below the surface. “Who’s going to tend to me if you’re ill?”

As they stepped inside her room, Julia could see the truth of it – the place could only be described as a chaotic mess – the bed hadn’t been made, clothes laid scattered, and the items along the shelves were completely disorganized. The ashes in the hearth had overflown from a lack of emptying. Even Saxa’s hair and dress were far less orderly than normal. I guess you really do need me.

It would take hours to clean everything, but as she began the girl’s mood changed. Julia tensed at the ominous sound of Saxa’s foot tapping. Glancing towards her, she saw the girls with her arms crossed, one eyebrow twitching.

“Are you going to tell me or not?”

“Tell you what?” Her palms began to sweat as she feared what the girl might say next. Did someone tell her what I tried to do?

“Siegfried! Did he take a liking to you or not?!” Saxa’s deep blue eyes almost sparkled in anticipation, as if expecting some romantic story of how she’d broken his outer shell and made him fall in love with her. She hated lying to Saxa, but the truth seemed far worse. She didn’t try to justify it, not even to herself. But she could never tell her what really happened.

“He fell asleep after you left. I don’t think he even realized I was there.”

Saxa stuck out her lip, pouting that she’d been robbed of a juicy story. Julia averted her gaze, afraid she’d be sucked in by the girl’s deep blue eyes and spill her secrets. Mentally she scrambled for a way out of the conversation.

“Is this a new dress?” She reached for a folded bundle on the bed, one with golden cloth peeking out from the edges.

“Don’t touch it!” Saxa moved faster than Julia had seen before, grabbing her hand and standing between her and the bundle. “I had it prepared for- well, something specific.”

The hesitation and vague answer caught Julia’s attention. Already suspicious, she decided to guess at its purpose. “For something, or someone?”

Saxa’s cheeks flushed red, giving Julia all the confirmation she needed. “I- it isn’t-”

“So that’s why you asked if I had a lover back home. You-”

“Don’t you dare tell anyone!” Saxa insisted, the outburst carrying a mix of fear and embarrassment. “I only get to see him a few times a year! So if you ruin this- I- I’ll-” her face scrunched up in hesitation. “Here, take this!” She grabbed another bundle from atop a storage chest and shoved it into Julia’s arms. “That one’s yours for the festival. Oh, speaking of dresses, I have to go. They need to finish mine for Yuletide.” Saxa went for the door as Julia gave her a questioning look. “You know, Yuletide? The biggest gathering of the year?” She spoke as if it shouldn’t need explaining, but Julia shook her head.

Saxa gave an exasperated sigh and slumped her shoulders. “I don’t have time to explain, they’re waiting on me. Just do the wash and be back by sundown. I need you to be ready in time.” She opened the door, but stopped as she was leaving. “And wear the dress I gave you! I need you to look nice when the guests arrive!”

Then she was gone, leaving Julia alone in the room. The sudden silence reminded her just how whimsical the girl could be. Well, she hasn’t changed at all.

Julia sat down on the bed, unwrapped the bundle in her arms and found the green dress Saxa had given her, along with the sash and other clothes she’d been wearing that night. They’d been cleaned of bloodstains and the seams resewn where they’d torn from Siegfried’s rough handling. It brought the memory back in detail, reminding her just how low she’d sunk that night.

Then she realized the bundle was too heavy to be just clothing. She checked between the folds and found a leather pouch she didn’t recognize. It was long and narrow, expertly sewn with long straps and buckles. Curious, she opened it and pulled out the item inside-

A wave of recognition flowed through her, freezing her body with fear. Her hand held the notched dagger, the same one she’d tried to kill Siegfried with.

***

An icy gust of wind raised goosebumps along her skin, making her question if she really needed to do this. The wash had taken most of the day – honestly, how much can one girl go through! – leaving very little time to get the answers she needed.

Just outside the great hall, the hilltop battlements had been swept clear of snow. The view allowed people to see for miles. The homes, walls, and ramparts of the town below, the open fields beyond, and the ice covered forests on the horizon. In the distance, little dots of torch-light moved beneath the trees as columns of people slowly made their way towards Tulingii.

Then she saw him. Siegfried stood on the battlements at the edge of the hill, leaning against the ramparts as he looked over the town below. His wolf cloak hung heavy in the wind, the only thing between her and his exposed back. Julia felt the dagger in the pouch, sharp and ready. It would be so easy. Just maybe- the scars across her back itched at the thought, reminding her what had happened the first time -or maybe not.

Julia deliberately crunched the snow beneath her feet, letting him know she was coming. He didn’t even glance in her direction until she was right beside him. Despite her reasons for coming to find him, she couldn’t help but take in his appearance.

His hair had been tied one long braid, ending in a strange knot. A leather headband held a red gem at the center of his forehead, like a small mirror of dark blood. The wolf-cloak hung heavy in the wind, its fur glinting in the fading light. His bronze scale armor had been polished to a near mirror finish, looking more ceremonial than practical.

“Why are you here?”

Julia realized she’d been staring and averted her gaze. She held out the leather pouch, the daggers handle protruding slightly. “This was mixed in with bundle you sent me.”

“Indeed.” He nodded and turned back towards the landscape, ignoring the knife.

Really, you’re going to make me say it word for word? “Why would you give it back? I already tried to use it once. It’s as if you’re telling me to-”

“For the same reason I let you live.” His voice seemed tired as he glanced over his shoulder at her. “Saxa needs you.”

Julia glared back incredulously. What she needs is someone she can trust. I already betrayed her once. “Anyone could serve Saxa. There’s over a hundred slaves in the great hall alone. Any of them would-” he was already shaking his head.

“Saxa doesn’t need a slave. If it were that simple, she’d have a dozen.” He turned away from ramparts to face her. “Would you protect her, no matter what?”

The only thing I want more is you dead, but since that’s not going to happen anytime soon- “Yes, I would.”

“Then you’ll need it. And she’ll need you to use it.”

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She tightened her grip on the knife. “But why am I so important? Every Blood Sworn in the town would protect her if she was threatened. She’s your sister, the king’s daughter-”

“Exactly!” His fist slammed down on the stone battlement, shattering the layer of ice. “And they-” He gestured towards the forest beyond, and the people emerging from it “-they all know she is the key to advancing themselves. Whoever marries her, their tribe will rise to power, second only to us. How many of them are plotting to make her theirs, to force her hand to their own ends?”

Julia remembered hearing similar discussions about nobles and politicians from Rome, the plots they cooked up, and how murderous they sometimes were. Suddenly, there and here felt eerily similar. “But doesn’t she have to marry one of them anyway? Just announce who it is, and that should settle it.”

Siegfried chuckled, the simple reaction showing more emotion than she’d seen from him ever before. “If only it were that simple, little raven. Announce who it is and he’ll be dead in a weeks’ time. Or if his rivals can’t kill him, they’ll go after Saxa to deny him the opportunity.”

Julia felt her blood rise at the idea, knowing that she’d gladly kill anyone who dared to try. Questions and hesitation were swept aside as she tucked the leather pouch back into her skirt and re-wrapped the sash to hide the bulge.

In the town below, the first group of guests had reached the outer gates. As the Blood Sworn raised the gate, the distant creaking of heavy timbers and popping of ice from the hinges announced their arrival.

“So, is there anyone in particular I should be worried about?”

Siegfried pointed at the crowd as they entered the gates and made their way up the hill – Chieftains, princes, warriors, attendants and slaves. “All of them.”

***

From the loft above, Julia watched the activity below in the throne room. Guests from the neighboring tribes, Celtic priests, champions and chieftains – all seemed to be in a friendly mood. Laughter and boastful challenges rang out, followed by even louder cheers as the challenges were met. Drinking horns were emptied, refilled and emptied again as everyone indulged their thirst.

King Aldric greeted one guest after another from his stone throne, his aged persona dominating the room despite the increasing number of chieftains and other important individuals. Siegfried and several Blood Sworn stood at Aldric’s side, dressed in matching armor. Together, they made an intimidating sight, one that only a madman would challenge. Earlier, Siegfried had explained yuletide to her – a gathering of chieftains during the winter solstice – but she hadn’t realized just how many there would be.

“Julia!” Saxa called, startling her from her thoughts. She hurried to where Saxa and several other women were lounging and began refilling cups as fast as she could. Most of the women looked to be her own age or younger, well dressed with plenty of jewelry, the daughters of chieftains and other important individuals brought along by their fathers as an opportunity to arrange marriages for them.

Julia continued pouring drinks, careful to avoid notice – Saxa had warned her it would be best to avoid drawing attention to herself, but hadn’t explained why. Then a name caught her attention.

“…Siegfried? Isn’t he married yet?” One girl asked.

Saxa sighed, shaking her head. “No. I’ve tried to make him notice someone-” Julia froze, afraid Saxa would put her on the spot. “-but he seems oblivious to her, as if she doesn’t exist. Even Berangar has more sense than that.”

“Speaking of, where is he?” Another one asked. “I haven’t seen him yet.”

As she listened to their conversation, Julia forgot to pay attention to the drink she was pouring. She caught herself a moment too late as the mead overflowed the edges of the cup. The lady gasped as it dribbled over her fingers.

“I’m sorry!” Julia grabbed a towel and reached down to wipe up the spill. As she did, the woman’s attention fell on her with a wicked smile.

“I don’t remember this one from last year.” Her fingers took hold of the decorative silver chain hanging from Julia’s collar, holding her in place as she glanced at Saxa. “Is she new?” As she spoke, the woman extended a finger between the folds of Julia’s dress, sliding it down the center of her chest.

What in Hades is she doing?! Julia steeled herself, knowing she shouldn’t pull away, that it would reflect poorly on Saxa if she did. All the ladies nearby seemed to turn their attention towards her situation, as if it were some sort of game.

Saxa nodded, still smiling. “My newest one. I haven’t fully trained her yet, but at least she’s trustworthy, unlike the last one.”

Some of the ladies cringed at that, as if remembering a bad memory they all shared.

The woman fixed Saxa with a gaze that looked more like a challenge. “Not even trained? Then why would she be wearing silver?” A fingernail ran along her collar, as if the woman were confirming its presence. “And yet she seems so well behaved.” She gave the word a forced sensual edge and slipped two more fingers into Julia’s dress, tickling the sides of her breasts.

“I think that’s enough.” One of the other ladies interrupted, but it didn’t stop. The woman’s fingernails slid over Julia’s skin, circling the sensitive center of Julia’s breast as they closed in. It was all she could do to stay still.

“Don’t you want to see how long she can last?” The woman asked no one in particular.

Saxa’s expression seemed carved from stone, as false a smile as she’d ever seen from her. Julia knew they were both trapped by the situation, Saxa by politics, herself by her status as a slave. So far, Saxa had restrained herself but at this rate, it wouldn’t matter for much longer. Julia felt the tickling give way to pain as the woman’s fingernails beginning to dig-

“Frida!” A familiar male voice called out as he bumped into the woman’s arm, his weight forcing her to leg go and pull back her hand. Suddenly free, Julia pulled away to see Berangar stumbling between them, red faced and slurring his words as if he’d already drank too much. He plopped down next to the woman and threw his arm around her shoulders as if they were close friends. For a moment, Frida seemed confused by his sudden intrusion, then smiled and leaned against him as if he was exactly what she’d wanted to begin with.

Julia stepped back from the lounging area, needing a moment to herself. But as she turned to leave, her eyes fell on something that froze her in place, overriding her need to escape. Draped across the back of the couch Frida and Berangar were using hung a large cloak embroidered with the face of a great black bear, the symbol of the Rauricii. Her hands shook as the memory came flooding back. The river, lining up to be sold, the druid priest…

“Julia!” Saxa’s voice brought her back to the present. She took the long way around to avoid Frida and knelt to refill Saxa’s cup.

“I’m sorry!” Saxa whispered in her ear. “I didn’t think she would do that!”

“I’m fine” Julia lied. “It’s just-” She hesitated as she tried to shake off her jumbled emotions. “Just an old memory, from before.”

Saxa eyed her with suspicion, no doubt wanting to get the truth out of her, but then an outburst of laughter distracted them. One girl had latched onto Beranger’s arm for balance, making a fool of herself as she tried to suggest something. The others also seemed focused on him as he went on about something – they weren’t paying attention to his words. He’d adjusted his cloak to stay open, exposing his bare chest, and Julia felt certain he was subtly flexing his muscles. Saxa looked away, face red with embarrassment from her twin’s shameless act.

Just four days of this, then everything will go back to normal. Between the ladies gathered around Saxa, and a group of young men in another area, glancing in Saxa’s direction more than was decent, Julia knew she would be busy every minute until it was over. Four very long days...

The night went on until only a few remained awake. Julia helped a somewhat drunk Saxa to her room, glad to finally escape the crowds and the Rauricii woman.

* * *

She was back in Verun, Blood Sworn riding through the streets, ignoring her as they cut down everyone else nearby. Her father swung at one in particular, his sword always missing. Siegfried grabbed the blade, sparks flying where iron skin met steel, tore it from her father’s grip and tossed it aside. Then he impaled Julius on his spear.

Julia tried to scream, but her voice refused to come. He took Iunia and threw her to a druid nearby. The priest took out his sickle, cut away Iunia’s clothes and held her down on a stone alter. Summoned by the offering, a beast emerged from the shadows nearby, a massive bear covered in black fur, frothing at the mouth as it looked over her sister. Then it leapt at her, teeth and claws extended-

Julia woke in a cold sweat, her scream echoing in the strange room. She looked around, trying to remember where she was. Slowly, she recognized her surroundings. The shelves, locked chests, piles of clothes and the hearth with glowing red embers of a dying fire. Just a dream, but she felt the fear flowing through her, hands still shaking.

A figure looked up from the bed, long tangled hair covering her face. “Julia?”

“I’m sorry Saxa. It’s just me. Nothing to worry about. ”

In the dim light, Julia could only see the girl’s silhouette as she sat up in bed and reached out to her. “Come here.”

Julia left the warmth of her blankets, and immediately realized how cold the room had become, and wished she’d been more vigilant in feeding the fire. As she reached the bed, Saxa’s soft hand grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her in, throwing the blankets and furs over her so to include her in the bed’s warmth.

“Now,” Saxa ordered, “tell me the truth.”

“But that is the truth. I didn’t mean to wake you, I just-”

“Had a dream?”

“Yes.”

Saxa hugged her close, their bodies pressing against one another. Julia tensed at the close contact, but appreciated the extra warmth it provided. Their foreheads touched as they rested on the pillows. Even in the dim light, Saxa’s blue eyes burrowed into her. “So it was just a dream. And last night? Last month? It’s been the same ever since they gave you to me.”

“I-” Please, don’t make me talk about this! “It’s like you said when we first met, it’s over now.”

Saxa laid a hand on her cheek. “Obviously.” Saxa’s eyes stared into hers, still waiting.

Julia took a deep breath and resigned herself. “I was at the seamstress house when it started…” she told her almost everything, the raid, Melina, Iunia and the Rauricii druid who tried to buy her sister. The only part she left out was Siegfried’s part in killing her father. It took some time to tell it all, as the painful memories threatened to overwhelm her at various points.

Saxa listened to every word, putting a hand to Julia’s cheek and wiping away the occasional tear. “You don’t have to worry about it anymore. The only thing you have to worry about is what I tell you. You’re here, you’re mine, and you’re one of us now.”

The idea tugged at her emotions, tempting in its simplicity. No more regret or revenge, only one thing that mattered. Just Saxa.

Several silent minutes passed as Saxa waited for her to say something. The more she thought about it, the more she felt herself giving in, drawn in by the girl’s deep blue eyes.

“Alright. From now on its just you, master.”

“I told you” Saxa went on in a tired voice, “I hate titles like that.” She smiled and kissed Julia on the forehead, then pulled her even closed in her ongoing hug. The gentle crackling of the fire continued as the only noise until Julia realized that Saxa had fallen asleep, leaving her no way to escape the bed.

Guess I’m sleeping here tonight.

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