The next day, I sat in Jackie's office eating lunch. I bit into the sandwich, then pointed it at Jackie. "Don't you remember the reason we always have lunch in your office? It's because that neck-bearded janitor is afraid of you," I said.
"I couldn't tell you why. I'm as sweet as candy," she said, taking a sip of her soup.
"I mean... if you consider yourself hard candy." As soon as I said it, I felt the incoming murderous intent. "See, look, you're about to give me that death stare thing you do." I laughed.
Through her evil scowl, a smile broke its way through. "You may have a point, but I deal with fewer weirdos because of my talent for spotting them out first." She wasn't wrong. Ever since I've known her, she's always been good at spotting weirdos. She could even easily detect if someone was hiding something. I did not have this superpower. Naturally, they saw this weakness and flocked toward me. Taking another sip of soup, she continued, "Like James, he is definitely hiding something."
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"What? Get out of here. James is a nice guy even though he's a bit off."
"Think about it. You've known James for such a long time, and you know nothing about him, but he is always asking you for help. He might have a crush on you."
"You're just paranoid. It doesn't seem like James has a crush on me. Besides, he's like a brother to me."
"Maybe, but I just know he's hiding something, and I can't trust him." Jackie simply didn't know what she was talking about. James was a completely normal dude. He was just shy. Finishing my sandwich, I placed my lunch box on the ground. Looking back up, I noticed Jackie was holding herself back from laughing. "Hey, remember when you got your last promotion?"
"How could I forget that lovely night? Ugh, what a disaster. That's the reason I stopped drinking tequila," I said, wiping the crumbs off my shirt.
Jackie dropped her spoon onto the table, tears rolling down her face as she laughed. "You should have seen your face as you ran out of the club."