After watching Rieka dismantle the man in front of the Watch-Commander, we received an official apology as well as the missing bounty money, which the former Squad-Commander still had on his person. The girls had initially insisted that I keep the money but when we realized how much it was, I told them to put it into the fund for the dimensional bag. With that bounty and the day's work we were three-fourths of the way to being able to afford one of the nicer dimensional sacks to carry our gear in. Apparently, the local merchants really wanted Ugly Jack taken care of.
When it was all said and done, I escorted the girls back to Juneau before being returned to Earth with my mission complete and the SP added to my interface. It was getting on towards evening, so I decided to get a shower in and then try to relax and do some research to see if I could find a way to train myself to fight better with the Shape-Shifting effects. The training from Cerebaton had definitely helped to fill in the gaps and get me to a functional level well beyond what I had started at, but I wanted more.
“Still a little surprised I survived that first mission.” I muttered while sluicing the soap off in the shower. “Lucked out with the girls being able to function in that situation. I can only imagine how it would have been if I’d been dropped there alone and without any backup at all. Probably would be dead already.” Thinking about it again, I shook my head and snorted while remembering my stomach’s rebellion at killing something and the pain of the injuries. “Yea, definitely would be dead. Even if there was only one or two, I'm pretty sure I’d have bled out from the kobolds without Kassandra there to heal me.”
My reverie was shattered by the distant pounding of someone at the door and I swore. Twisting the knob to shut the water off, I snatched a towel and ran it over my body quickly to dry off.
“I’m coming!” I shouted when the pounding resumed a moment later. “Dunno who the hell that could be.” I muttered, grabbing the first set of pants I could find, which was the dirty set still left over from my trip. Ugh, whatever they’ll do to answer the door. I thought while scrubbing at my hair with the towel and hurrying out to answer the door as the pounding resumed again. No way it’s Cari or Cerebaton. They’d just appear in the living room or something but they’d also message me first. Hell, for all I know they crawl out from under the bed or out of the closet…
I live in a fairly rough area. There is a decent homeless population that squats in the area and a few that actually camp in the parking lot of my apartment complex. There are some rather questionable individuals that live in the building too, folks that I’m fairly certain are on the gray or outright wrong side of the law and drug paraphernalia was something I had just gotten used to seeing in the lot.. So I didn’t just jerk the door open and demand to know what they wanted. Nor did I just peek through the peephole in the door, but that was more due to the fact that the front door didn’t have one. I guess they cost extra and the housing company didn’t want to spend the money or something.
Instead of that I actually had something far simpler. The practice weapons that I used with Cerebaton leaned up against the wall behind the door and I grabbed one before undoing all but the chain lock then opened the door a few inches to see who it was. I figured that if someone tried to rob me, I could try and use the magic I’d picked up to make the difference but first I’d try regular intimidation.
The voice identified the person before I’d even gotten the door open an inch though and I relaxed.
“There you are, fart-stick! Was wondering if you’d fallen in and drowned or something!” Shouted the friendly pain in the ass that stood on the other side of my door just as I started to open it.
“Of course it’s you, Jameson. Get your paddy-ass in here already.” I sighed, slamming the door shut and setting the practice sword down once more before undoing the chain and swinging the door open the full way to admit my friend, Jameson Gillespie.
Jameson was short and rather Irish. I know that probably sounds bad, but he legitimately enjoyed playing up the stereotype to annoy people. Add in the fact that his parents had the ironic humor to name him after a brand of Irish whiskey and it was a matter of choosing between sinking or swimming. He stood around five feet in height and had messy, carrot-orange hair that was currently contained under a leather newsboy cap. If it had been a work night, I would have expected Jameson to be wearing a button-down business shirt and a neat pair of slacks. Since it was the weekend, he had on a battered Flogging Molly band shirt and an old pair of jeans over his work boots. Sharp, gray eyes gave me a once over as his mobile mouth turned up in a grin amongst the short, curly goatee he sported on his pointed chin.
“One of these days you are going to say that around mum and she’s going to wallop you one. She’d even say she owed it to your mum to do it, you know?”
“Eh, I’m not afraid of your mum. She loves me too much to beat me too much. That’s what she’s got you for after all. Come on dude, have a seat and let me throw on a shirt. I was in the shower when you knocked.”
“Oh? Got a hot date tonight or something?” Jameson wandered into the apartment and gave it a once over with his hands tucked into his pockets while I locked the door up once more. When I turned back to Jameson he was watching me with a curious expression.
“No, no date, dude. Just a long day is all.” I told him while pushing past the much shorter man to head back to the bedroom to get changed. “Feel free to grab a seat. Surprised you just showed up, you normally call ahead.”
“I did call ahead, bell-end.” Jameson called after me before I heard the crinkle of fabric as he flopped down onto the couch. “Bloody hell, you really need some nicer furniture. Almost busted my tail-bone on this broken-down couch of yours.”
“Not my fault your skinny ass has no padding. I must have missed the call.” Not that his unexpected arrival mattered, Jameson was one of the few people who had a standing invitation just to crash my place after all.
“Obviously. It rang forever and then gave me one of those automated ‘out of service range’ messages. Were you up in the mountains or something? Or did your asshole of a boss call you in and then stuff you in a freezer?” Jameson’s reply echoed up the hallway as I worked quickly to change into fresh clothes, tossing the sweat-stiffened jeans into the laundry bin. I winced when I noticed several spots of dried blood on the pants.
Crap, going to have to wash those sooner rather than later if I want to try and keep them from staining. I thought before hurrying back into the living room. Jameson was sprawled across the couch, somehow managing to take up all three seats with his short frame and I just rolled my eyes, dragging one of the chairs over from the kitchen to sit on.
“You want a soda or something dude?”
“Sure, that or a beer. First day off in about three weeks and here I am using it to check on my oxygen-bandit of a friend.” He caught the can of Coke I threw at him and popped it open with a smooth motion of long practice.
“You know, I hate that about you.”
“What? My glorious good looks.” Jameson grinned broadly behind his can, eyes sparkling with amusement.
“The fact that you are deluded enough to think that actually. That and how you can eat anything and stay skinny.” I shot back, settling into my chair with a sigh and cracking my own soda.
“Gotta keep up the confidence, man. Chicks dig a confident man.”
Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
“Dig him a grave, maybe. How are things going with Lola?”
“Eh, not so good. She wasn’t able to cope with my work schedule. She was apparently so engrossed in dating someone like a high profile architect that she forgot I’m also high-demand and one of the more junior ones at the firm.” Jameson brushed the question off with ease and I didn’t push. He’d been dating Lola for the last year and a half and I’d thought this would have been the one to finally settle him down.
“Sorry to hear that, dude.” I held up my can in salute and he matched me.
“It’s life. Finding love isn’t as easy as the skin mags make it seem after all.”
“How's the wrist doing then?” I laughed as he flipped me the bird in response.
“It’s just fine, thank you. Most drafting is done on computers nowadays. I only do the basic sketches by hand anymore.” Jameson replied airily, not rising to the bait and instead choosing to misinterpret my jibe. “What about you, Liam? You finally find someone willing to climb that step-ladder to kiss that wrinkled arse you call a mug?”
“Nice burn, height and face at once.”
“I’m trying. Need to keep up the game after all. Answer the question now, Liam. I know you well enough to know you are stalling.” Jameson smirked again while taking another swig of his soda.
It took me a minute to think of a response. Partially while deciding how to explain the relationship that I had with the girls without giving too much away and partially to figure out how to volley back his insult towards me. We’d had the game running for so long that it was just part of the relationship we had now. The only time we’d dropped it was at funerals.
“I don’t know if I have the time or crayons to explain it right now…” I ducked the empty can he threw at me with a laugh.
“Dude, stop ducking the question and just give me the answer!” He demanded between chuckles, though he rolled his eyes when he saw the gleam in mine. “Don’t you dare…”
“42?”
“Pillock.” Groaned Jameson and I sniggered. When he fell back on European insults, I knew I was winning.
“I had to, dude. It’s required to make the joke when you set it up like that.” I snorted before waving off his glare. “Seriously though, yes I do have a girl. No, I'm not introducing her to you. The last thing I need is for you to scare Kass off with that crass attitude of yours.”
“Out of all the sperm to win the race…” Jameson sighed in resignation and overblown disappointment before he leaned back into the couch. “You wound me. Clearly the woman needs to have her eyes checked if she’s dating someone who looks like I drew them with my left hand.”
“You forget, whiskey-dick, I know that you are ambidextrous. So that’s not really an insult.” I shot back with a grin.
“Yea yea, forgot you knew that.” Jameson waved the comment off with a good natured grin. “Regardless, tell me about her! Kass, you said? Is she cute?”
“Yup. And complete mischief wrapped up in a little bundle of curves.”
“God damn you man. Why can’t you find a fellow giant and leave all the sweet little ones for those of us that don’t smack our heads on ceiling fans or door jambs?”
“Pretty sure this ‘sweet little one’ would shank you if you tried to get between us. She’s pretty possessive.” I couldn’t help but laugh at the image of Kassandra menacing Jameson with her new knife. The little dwarf lamia was still shorter than Jameson on his best day but I could only imagine the chaos that would ensue if the two ever met.
“I like them feisty. That’s good for you though dude, you need a woman with some spine to get you to stick up for yourself.” Jameson had been letting his gaze wander the room and it settled on the wooden swords leaning against the wall by the door and his eyes went wide. “Swords? What the heck man, you started doing that LARP stuff and didn’t tell me?” He jumped to his feet and hurried over to grab one of the wooden weapons to inspect it.
I panicked for a moment, trying to figure out what to say in response to that before an idea struck me and I just spat it out without thinking.
“Workout actually.”
“Workout? A sword-fighting workout?” Jameson struck a pose that reminded me more of Star Wars than anything legitimately like a fighting pose.
“Yea, a workout. It’s…uh…a new thing I picked up from a friend. Been wanting to get into better shape after all.”
“You? In better shape?” Jameson laughed as he continued to playfully flick the practice sword through the air. “Liam, you’ve been one of the most fit people I know for years. And I know a fair number of people. You get any fitter and you girl might have trouble keeping others off you,”
“Yea, but most of the people you know are desk-jockeys.”
“And construction guys.” Jameson reminded me, setting the sword back down and wandering over to open my refrigerator to peer inside.
“Whatever dude. Sure, I’ve been strong for a while but I was getting fat. Plus, this’ll build my reflexes up nicely.”
“Dunno about fat dude, I occasionally envy your ability to be able to reach top shelves and actually put on muscle mass.” The door to the refrigerator closed with a quiet slap and a crack-hiss preceded Jameson reappearing with another soda in his hand.
“Yea yea, don’t be ashamed of what you are, Jameson. That’s your parents job.” I ducked the idle backhand he threw as he went by, laughing.
“Whatever, asshat.” Jameson flopped down onto the couch again. “So tell me about this Kass some more. I want to hear all about my little boy’s adventures in romance.”
“Still not going to introduce you to her.”
“You are about as much fun as wet socks, Liam.”
“And you are like a gray sprinkle on a cupcake, Jameson.”
We bickered for another half an hour before the beer came out and Jameson continued to playfully prod and pry at me until I told him the basics of how I’d met Kassandra. He got even more excited when I let slip that I was hanging out with Kassandra and her ‘cute friend’ Rieka. I had to do some quick talking to ensure that I didn’t spill the beans about them being from another world. Instead I spun it as them going to an exclusive college and that I’d run into them while I was driving up in the mountains. I carefully did not mention the fact that I had been yanked between dimensions while I was in the mountains and met them there, or that we regularly fought and killed monsters. Instead, I explained that I went with them on weekend hikes and trips into the mountains to do various tasks related to their majors, without mentioning what those majors were. Talking around the truth without lying outright was exhausting, but my friend didn’t press too hard thankfully.
Jameson clearly knew there was more to the story and continued to pry at the edges to see if he could shake loose some detail that would let him dig more. He didn’t just outright ask me though. It was something I appreciated about him. He’d always been like this, willing to engage and work at the edges of a problem with me to try and get me to loosen up without just trying to dive into the guts of the issue. Far too many people would just demand an answer, hell Kassandra was in the habit of doing it too. With Jameson though, he worked around it slowly until you were comfortable spilling details. And while he teased me about the edges too, he never called me a liar either. Never questioned the fact that I had a girl I was into and that I regularly hung out with her and her friend. We insulted each other playfully, but we never doubted each other. It was one of the reasons that I knew I could count on Jameson.
The banter continued for several hours with us moving into a couple more beers after the first and I realized it was finally dinner time when Jameson begged off to head out the door.
“I’d better be going, Liam. Got a beautiful woman waiting on me and I don’t wanna make her wait long with dinner.”
“Tell your mom I said ‘hi’ and I miss her cooking then.” I teased and he rolled his eyes.
“Ha, ha, Liam. You know you have the face for radio comedy right?”
“I’m learning to embrace my mistakes. Speaking of, want a hug?”
“Ouch, that was a good one. Gonna save that for the family reunion.” Jameson laughed before yanking me upright with a grunt and we shared a hug between friends. “Seriously, dude. We need to not let so much time pass before we hang out again. I’m sure mum would love to have you over for one of the holiday barbecues we do. You should bring Kass with you. I promise not to try and seduce her away from you. Heck, I’ll only flirt with her friend.”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep. And I’ll see what I can do, Jameson. You have a good one and drive safely on the way back to your flat.”
“Will do.” Jameson was halfway out the door when he paused and looked back over his shoulder. “You look like you are doing good, Liam. Keep doing what you are doing. This Kass girl seems good for you.” He said seriously before a broad grin cracked his face. “Just make sure she never finds out her ‘knight in shining armor’ is actually a jester wrapped in aluminum foil.”
Before I could respond, he slammed the door and I heard the clatter of his boots as he raced away to the stairs, laughing distantly.
“Ass.” I muttered with a smirk and began cleaning up the detritus of our conversation. “I rather wish I could introduce him to Kassandra and Rieka. I think he’d either have a stroke meeting them or think it was the coolest thing ever.”