"Nahh, go for astronaut." I point at the laptop's screen on Saya's legs, who was sitting with her back to my chest, while I was sitting on the bed, with my own back against the bed's headboard. A radio placed on the stand that was next to the bed. One that Saya used to talk with her father, or mother. Apparently, she's something like his 'messenger' now, so he won't have to send soldiers to find me every time he wants me for something…
"Pfft. Your penguin cosplayer? An astronaut? Petty criminal, at best. He won't be getting any promotions with his crappy athletic stat. Let alone bringing any money back." Saya snorts as she keeps panning the camera around the relatively big seaside house on the screen…
"I got us the money tree, it will make up for it." I respond…
(I'm going to be honest here. I didn't expect Saya to 'like' playing video games. So imagine my surprise when I came here and found her playing sims again...)
"Still, why can't we use your old save file? I mean, you went ahead and dressed me as a damn penguin again. The only difference is that my surna…"
"B, because I had progressed too far by myself there! Don't be a lazy ass, it's no fun if you gain everything from the get-go." Saya quickly cuts me off.
"Uhh, you got a point there…" I respond as I tighten my arms around her waist, Saya wiggling slightly to fix her posture without saying anything…
(And, this is way more fun than I thought it'd initially be. Then again, I guess doing things you like with somebody you like is always fun.)
Saya then stops moving her fingers, and starts staring at the screen...
Before turning the laptop slightly to the left, towards the windowed wall. Making the screen 'mirror' our reflections a bit more clearly. And as she kept staring, a small smile crept up on her face, or well, her reflection's face.
"Watcha smirking for?" I ask I turn to look at the actual Saya. Something that was easier said than done, what with her having two giant twintails on each side of her head.
"N, nothing." She quickly responds as she turns the laptop back to its initial position. Then starts to play the game normally again.
"Hey, can I ask you something?" She asked as she kept looking at the screen.
"What's up?" I ask back.
"Can you, stay here?" She asks as she lowers her sight slightly, turning to look at the keyboard.
"Uhh. Well, this place 'is' nice. But I don't know how viable it is to stay under the army's command in the long term…" I respond as I tilt my head.
"I, don't mean here as in this building you idiot…" Saya answers with a slight huff.
"I mean 'here'. As in Japan…" She adds with an almost whiny whisper…
"Uhhh." I just blink a couple of times as I turn to look at her.
"M, my house is big, we have a lot of empty rooms. Once we get it back you can stay in one of them I'm sure my papa and mama won't mind they might seem harsh but I'm sure that they would…"
"Oh, that's what you mean. Uhh, I can't just live as a permanent guest in somebody else's house Saya." I cut the pinkette off before you could increase her speech speed to 'gibberish' level…
Saya just keeps her head lowered…
"You wouldn't be a guest, stupid..." Saya whispers through her teeth, silently enough to the point that I think she did not want me to actually hear her. She then takes a deep breath.
"I, I know, sorry. I'm being too egotistical. You don't even know how your actual family is doing, Yet here I am, saying stupid stuff…" Saya folds her arms under her chest as she speaks in a low toned voice.
(...Uhh. Right, I'm supposed to have 'them' too. I had honestly forgotten about them. As they are not even my' family to begin with…)
I glanced at Saya, who looked, way more upset than I honestly expected…
(Uhh, ok. I really don't want her to be like this, so…)
"But, I got no intention of leaving Japan anyway." I say flatly. Causing the pinkette to turn towards me with a sad, confused frown.
"Why do you think I was in Japan by myself in the first place? I, was not exactly on the best terms with them." I add as I turn to look towards the windowed wall to my left.
(...That, is actually a lie. The 'me' before 'me', was actually on pretty good terms with them. No dick of a father, or evil stepmother, or fucked up brothers. They were, normal. And happy, to put it plainly.)
"Oh, I'm, sorry. I didn't mean to bring it up…" Saya responds, looking even more down in the dumps now…
(Oh for fucks sake, now you found the time to be sensitive?)
"Saya, let me clear about something." I let out a small sigh as I moved to get next to her, ending on her side as she turned her head to look at me.
"You and Saeko, you two mean a lot to me, more than 'I' mean to myself." I lean myself slightly towards her as I place my hand on her thigh. Saya blinking blackly at me a couple of times before glancing around as she lowered her face again.
"When you decided to come with me in the river. Other than the fact that I freaked out. It was the happiest moment of my damn life, to know that you wanted to come with me, even though staying with Takashi was the safer option." I take my hand from her thigh and bring it to her cheek. Saya just stayed frozen on the spot. Well, 'frozen' is a weird word to use for the moment, as now that I was not wearing my gloves. I could feel her cheek, and it was burning up.
"So remember, just having you two around me, is reason enough for me to say that this whole shitshow is worth it. So stop looking so distraught over this." I add as I stroke her cheek with my thumb.
"...stupid…" Saya mumbles.
"...you didn't have to mention Saeko..." She whines as she turns her body to face me, the laptop sliding off her legs and onto the bed.
"You're supposed to be mine now. So, don't mention Saeko. Only me..." She adds as she lowers her head.
(Well, at least she no longer seems to be down in the dumps, now she's just pouting again. Normal chundere stuff I suppose)
"Hmm? I'm yours? Completely?" I 'ask' as I lean towards her lowered face.
"Y, yes. So don't disagree with me…" Saya whines back as she lifts her head to look at me.
"Hmm, I didn't disagree with you?" I ask as I tilt my head, lowering my hand from her cheek.
"I want you to k, kiss me…" She then blurts out with a commanding tone as she keeps looking at me, her face turning to match the color of her hair by the second…
( First say not to disagree, then shoot commands?)
Yet, the moment I try to lean towards her, she puts her hands between me and her, and pushes me…
"M, me on top…" She adds as she turns her head to look away.
(Ohh? My you scheming little...)
She then pushes me again, slightly, only enough to actually feel that she did so.
"Don't disagree…" She whines as she keeps looking away.
"I, didn't?" I tilt my head slightly as I keep staring at her.
(Was she always this cute?)
"Then lie down already…" She whines back, 'pushing' me once again…
I, just did what she asked. It's not like I was losing something here…
And the moment I was with my back on the bed, Saya passed one of her legs over me, effectively sitting on me…
"Happy now?" I ask as I raise an eyebrow.
"S, shut up…" She squeaks as she keeps looking away.
And, we stayed like that…
For a few minutes…
"You know I can't do anything from down here, right?" I ask as I keep looking at the blushing pinkette, who darted her head to me, before looking away again…
"A, I know that…" She responds as she takes a deep breath, then clears her throat.
"Ok, I can do this." She whispers.
(...She, seriously just said that out loud?…)
And while Saya was looking like a blushing trainwreck and I was trying to hold my self back from snickering, she grabs my shirt with both hands and turns to look at me, then lowers her head towards mine…
A bit, fast. Too fast. Forehead bumping kind of fast…
"Ow! Dmit…" Saya instantly puts her hand on her forehead as she leans back with an annoyed groan…
"Are you sure you don't want me to, take over?" I ask as I make a one-sided smile at her.
"N, no! I can do it!" She retorts as she frowns at me, one hand still massaging her forehead...
(This is not a challenge to get mad over you dumbo...)
She then lowers her self again, this time, slower…
And this time, she did manage to do what she was aiming for in the first place, as she pressed her lips on mine…
Then, a few seconds passed. And the seconds, then turned to minutes. Saya showing no signs of stopping...
(She's, really into it. Who would ha...)
And my thoughts get interrupted, as I feel something 'invading' my mouth…
(...Uhh, Saya just shoved her tongue in? When did she, uhh, wait. She's, panting? Oh boy, don't tell me…)
As I bring my hand to her back and lightly run my fingers over her spine, she tenses up and lets out a soft moan, pushing herself against me…
(...Well. Ok, let's be honest, there's only one way this can e...)
"Saya are you there?" And the radio goes live...
"EEP!" And the Pinkette quickly pulls back, literally jumping off me and landing on the bottom half of the bed, next to my feet. She then starts darting her head around in a panic, before looking at the radio…
(...End…)
She then quickly gets to the radio while still staying on the bed.
"Y, yes?" She asks, with a panting voice...
"Saya? Are you alright? You sound, funny." A female voice asks through the radio.
"Ahh. Y, yea I'm fine. I'm fine, I was just, uhhh. Exercising." She blurts out as she keeps taking deep, bated breaths…
"I see. Is Naier with you?" The voice asks.
(She's not that stupid to actually say...)
"Yes." Saya answers flatly...
(SAYA YOU A FOKIN MORON?!)
"Can you tell him to come over please? Your father needs him for something." The voice asks with the same tone…
"Y, yea, Ok…" Saya nods slightly, her voice steadily returning to normal…
"Alright. Thank you dear." The voice responds…
If you find this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the infringement.
"Did you seriously just..."
"And, sorry for interrupting you during your exercising." The voice adds with a slight giggle as it cuts me off
"...Fuck…" I add as I keep staring at the radio.
"W, what? Got a problem with what I said?" Saya 'asks' as she turns to look at me with a blushing frown…
"...Nope, everything's jiffy…" I respond as I let my upper body fall back on the bed…
"Other than your mother probably thinking that you're no longer a virgin." I add flatly.
"WHAT?!" Saya shouted as I felt the bed shake…
"Seriously. Just, take this chat you had with your mother and replay it in your head." I say as I lift my finger towards the ceiling…
"Y, your ove…"
"Just do it, question by question. Answer by answer…" I cut her off. Saya then, falls quiet…
And, about a minute later…
"Oh God…" She speaks up as she comes to a 'realization'...
"But, but…" She then stutters as she turns to stare at the radio that she was holding with both hands…
"M, mama!" She shouts as she quickly presses the talk button on the radio…
"Hmm? Yes Saya?" Her mother speaks up.
"I, I didn't do anything with Naier!" She blurts out with a loud voice…
(...God, I could facepalm my hand through my face right now…)
"H, he's an idiot, I don't like him!" She adds right after…
(...Ok, that, actually hurts.)
Yuriko, who was on the other side of the radio, just giggled.
"You should not say things like that without thinking Saya." Yuriko responds.
"Wha, bu…"
"Just come to the bottom floor with Naier." She adds, cutting off the flustered pinkette.
"...Ok…" Saya answers with a defeated tone.
"You can continue exercising afterward ~" Yuriko says with a chuckle before closing the radio.…
"Mamma!" Saya shouts back. And got no response...
"W, we should go to them, now! " She shouts as she quickly jumps off the bed, then runs to the door that leads outside.
And as she grabbed the handle. She stops, and turns to look down. Between her legs…
"A, I'm going to change first!" She responds as loudly as she runs to the bathroom after grabbing a new set of, everything. While I was just looking at the whole thing unfold, still laying on the bed…
(...I don't know what's weirder. That I'm actually bothered because she said that she doesn't like me. That she decided to change clothes after looking 'between' her legs. Or her mother's reaction to what she 'thinks' might have happened. I mean, continue exercising afterward? Really now?…)
I get to a sitting position on the bed, get the laptop, and leave it on the stand after closing it completely...
A few minutes later, Saya exited the bathroom, wearing a loose white woolen like shirt that went to about the middle of her hips, a wide 'v' cut leaving one of her shoulders visible. Her school skirt partly visible under the shirt. And, I think she was also wearing tights under her skirt, as I could see a pair of tightly fitting leggings that ended a couple of centimeters higher above her knees, her shoes were a pair of pink and white sneakers…
"Why are you still sitting there! Come on!" She says as she turns to head towards the door again, this time, swinging it wide open.
(Well, let's go...)
I get off the bed and head towards the door as well, wearing my 'headgear' in the process.
"Come on you slowpoke!" She groans with an annoyed tone as she turns towards me, only to find me standing next to her.
"Why are you wearing that thing again?" She asks as she points at my face.
"Protection." I responded flatly…
"Huh, from wha…
"Your father." I cut her off…
"Y, you have no reason to need protection stupid. N, nothing happened." Saya glances around as her face starts to blush.
"Yea, but he doesn't know that, so let's go before he decides to come up here with a vengeance…" I respond as I point behind Saya, towards the hallway.
"You are the one who's slow here." Saya retorts as she turns to leave the room, with me following behind her.
"You have my keys?" I asked once I got outside.
"Right." She nods and pulls the keys out of her jacket's pocket, then locks the door.
With that, we headed to the stairs, and started going down...
"Does your father know how to shoot a gun?" I ask as we keep moving down the stairs.
"I don't know, he usually trained with his sword, never seen him use a gun. My Mama does though." Saya answers as she glances at me.
"Your Mama didn't seem to mind getting the wrong idea. Or she's faking it so she can shoot me once we go down.?" I 'ask'.
"N, nothing will happen ok!" Saya retorts with a loud voice.
"Probably…" She then whispered as she turned to look at the steps under her…
(Very assuring you are…)
And with that, we went to the bottom floor…
Finding Saya's mother in a business-like suit. She was not wearing a jacket to match the pants though, instead sporting a long-sleeved, white, buttoned shirt.
Her dad was also there, in his usual militaristic black uniform, his sword on his side…
(...Ok, he is not charging at me while screaming bloody murder. That's good.)
"Naier, good job on the recon." Souichiro then speaks up in his usual, 'I'm always glaring' expression.
"Now, the reason I called you here is to tell you what I want you to do next." He adds as he folds his arms…
(...Wait, wanted to call me in order to dump work on me? Ugh, should have figured…)
"The lookout thing?" I ask, and he shakes his head.
"No, reclamation of a location." He responds flatly…
(...Whut?...)
"We have three of them right now. The hospital, the cinema and the gas station. All locations you should know, as they are the ones you saw from the helicopter." Shouchrio then turns to look behind him, through the double glass door that led outside.
(...Oh sure, just let me split myself in three real quick...)
"All of them?" I ask as I tilt my head.
"No, just one. Best I can offer you, is the liberty of choosing which one." He responds as he turns around completely, now facing the door, with his back turned to me…
"You can choose your team for this. Tell my daughter to inform me when you're ready. One hour, tops." He adds as he starts walking away…
(Yes sir, thank you sir, I almost fucked your daughter sir. Maybe I should have done so sir…)
"This is ridiculous…" Saya hisses in an irked tone before turning around to stomp her way towards the stairs…
Leaving me. And her mother…
"I'm sorry you have to go through this." She says as she glances at her daughter, then at me.
"Nothing is really free, ain't that how it goes? If we want to be treated like we're special compared to the rest of the civilians, we need to 'be' special. That translates to being of use to the ones that decide if we deserve such treatment..." I respond as I fold my arms. Yuriko just smiles at me.
"Thank you, for understanding." She adds as she nods slightly.
"Uhh, actually speaking of understanding, I need to ask you something." I say before Yuriko could turn to leave. She nodded again as she stayed in place.
"About your little chat with Saya on the radio. Don't take it as a complaint. But, uhhh, why do you seem so, nonchalant about it?" I ask plainly as I tilt my head.
Yuriko just giggles as she shakes her shoulders lightly, closing her eyes as she turns her head away.
"You might not realize it, but both I and my husband hold you in pretty high regard. Not only because you managed to save us from a really ugly situation. But, from my point of view at least. I can say that you're a good person. And Souichiro would not count on you this much, if he didn't trust you to pull through." She responds as she turns to look at me.
(Second time today I heard the 'I have faith in you so I'm going to fuck up your life"...)
"Because I pushed her to say goodbye to you in the estate? I mean, that's all I did when you were around…" I ask as I tilt my head.
"Sounds insignificant to you? Just more proof that I'm right then. If you can, see it from my side, Takashi, who I considered to be Saya's only real childhood friend, was fine with sitting in the corner and watching as my daughter hanged her head." She adds as she smiles bitterly…
"I know that I failed at raising her, I did not spend enough time with her when I should have. Because of that she became spoiled, aggressive, easily agitated. But seeing the few people that she called her friends stare at her from the sidelines while she needed somebody to push her to do the right thing. It, doesn't make it any better." She adds as she looks away, lightly running her fingers under her eyes.
"But, to answer your question. Of course I knew that you two didn't do 'anything'." She says as she turns back to look at me, the previous 'weakness' she just showed now nowhere to be seen, like it never actually happened in the first place.
(…)
"Neither of you would have bothered answering the radio if that was the actual case." She adds with a small chuckle as she smiles…
(...Are you always smiling when you actually want to cry? Life must suck if you can't express your emotions...)
"Uhh, how am I supposed to answer that?" I ask back, Yuriko just smiles at me again.
"You don't, and I think it's better you return. I'm pretty sure that there are people that you need to speak with right now." She answers as she motions behind me with her head…
"Uhh, yea, true that. Well, I'm going to get going then." I say as I make a small bow, then turn to head towards the empty stairs.
(That, was something I didn't expect to see. Does she really trust me that much to open up like this?…)
With that thought, I make my way back towards my room…
(Ok, focus. We have other problems to deal with now. Three of them. And to be honest, one is worse than the other. Hospital? Fucking hell zone. The gas station? Overrun and blocked off. The only location I don't know, is the cinema. Could be overrun, could have survivors. But fat chance it's empty…)
Upon making my way towards my room. I find Saya waiting outside, tapping her foot, arms folded, and an angry frown on her face…
"Huh, you actually look more annoyed than me right now." I speak up as I get next to her, causing her to turn towards me.
"Can you believe him!" She shouts as she points her whole hand towards the stairs.
"Choose where to go?! These places are all death traps! He's going to get you killed!" She shouts again…
"Uhh, not much we can do about it. It's that, or get kicked into the masses. I'd rather do this, than having to sleep in a sleeping bag next to five farting guys." I respond as I fold my arms. Saya showing no sign of calming down…
(Plus you know, 'you' would have to sleep next to them. And the way you usually sleep, is just a 'tad' provocative…)
"What is going on?" And, a new voice speaks up from behind me. Turning to it, I find Saeko looking at us. Her hair up on a ponytail, wearing a rather, tightly fitting black shirt, along with a black, unzipped jacket, the lower section of her body hidden behind the door frame…
(Huh? Aren't these my clothes?...)
"Papa is trying to get Naier killed is what's going on!" Saya shouts as she turns to Saeko, turning to point her finger at me…
"...What?" Saeko, just tilts her head in confusion…
"New 'mission' ." I respond as I lift both hands and bend my index and middle fingers a couple of times.
"Alone?" Saeko asks right after as she narrows her eyes.
"No, he told me I can pick who c.."
"Wait there." And she cuts me off as she disappears into her room…
Only to pop up literally twenty seconds later, fully dressed in her combat outfit. Well, 'combat' as in her school shirt, and that excessively short skirt with stocking, along with the arm and leg guards. The Sword hanging from the belt on her hip.
(How the hell did she change so fast?!)
"I think we should go inside a room before we keep on talking." Saeko adds as she stops next to me.
I nod, and turn to Saya…
"W, what are you staring at me for?" She asks as she frowns.
"First, you forget to tell your mom about…" I stopped talking as I remembered that Saeko was with us now...
"The thing. Now, you forget that you got the keys to my room?" I add after a few seconds, Saya's eyes going wide in response.
"OH CRAP!" She shouts as she starts to run towards the stairs.
Only to end up bent over as I placed my arm in front of her, making her run into it…
"What are you doing! We need to!..."
"I already talked with your mother for you. You're welcome. The door please?" I 'ask'.
"O, oh…" Saya stares blankly at me for a few seconds, then backs off, straightening her shirt before turning to head to the door.
"W, what did you tell her?..." She asks as she unlocks the door…
(...Don't, don't, don't.)
"That you couldn't control yourself." I respond flatly. Causing Saya to turn at me with a panicked expression, her eyes taking a whole new level of 'wide'.
(Fuck, coldn't resist…)
"Y,yyy you said WHAAAT?!" She shouted as she kept holding on the door.
"Naier? Is there something that I should be aware of?" Saeko asks as she turns to me, resting her hand on her blade's hilt…
(Oh shiet…)
"Not really, Saya just gave all the wrong answers when talking to her mother via the radio, while having all the wrong, voice tones. And no, before you have a heart attack, I did not tell her that." I respond as I look at Saeko, then at Saya.
"What did you tell her then!" Saya shouts yet again.
"That nothing happened." I respond casually as I walk past her, and into the room.
"I don't believe you!" She retorts as she also walks into the room.
"I, still have no idea of what is going on here…" Saeko adds as she tilts her head…
And like that, we moved back into the room. Me sitting on the chair by the table that was on the far-off corner of the room, next to the windowed wall and the wall that led to the bathroom to the right. Saya sitting on the bed along with Saeko.
"For your own good, you better not be lying about what you said to my mama…" Saya said as she lets out a huge sigh after plopping on the bed's corner.
"I'm not, so let's focus on the reason you started shouting in the first place?" I respond.
"I was not shouting!" Saya shouts…
"Ai, so. About the team I'm supposed to make." I say as I pretty much ignore the pinkette.
"Hey don't ignore me!" Saya whines as she puffs her cheeks.
"Saya, I want you on the comms again." I respond flatly. Causing said pinkette to blink blankly at me a couple of times, her 'rage' seemingly deflating like a balloon…
"Uhh, what?" She asks as she frowns.
"I want you, to be on the comms." I answer as flatly again.
"No. I'm coming with you." She protests as she folds her arms…
(Oh boy…)
Saeko during all this, stayed quiet, switching her sight between me and Saya.
"And we'll get some random smuck and hope he's competent enough. While he also gets to listen in on us instead." I respond as I also fold my arms.
"Hum, you say that. But you just want to be alone with Saeko…" She whines as she turns to look away, a pout still on her face..
"Saya, you were already on the coms once. You already know how that side works. I need somebody there who can react fast. No matter where' I decide to go, I won't be drawing a map while running from hordes, or keeping information of what and who's where and in what number. I expect the coms to have and give me that information, fast. Essentially, to be some sort of minimap for me." I respond as I lean on the chair.
"You expect me to trust all that on some random dude that I have never seen before? Plus, you can draw, meaning you can make an outline of a map much better than the rest of us." I add. Saya keeps her head turned towards the stand, her cheeks still puffed…
"I can do all that while I am 'there'." She complains with a whiny tone.
"Yea, but it'll be too hindering. Or you think that sitting in front of a computer and noting down information is as easy to do while you have some stinking corpse clicking its teeth at your ear?" I 'ask'. Saya does not respond, just keeps looking away, arms folded.
(Uhh…)
"Don't be so childish Saya." Saeko then speaks up, a serious tone in her voice.
"W, what?!" Saya darts her head to Saeko.
"Naier trusted you with something to do. Do you intend to keep whining and refusing what he asked of you without giving him a better solution?" Saeko 'asks' as she crosses her legs.
"That's easy for you to say! You are the one that is going to be there alone with him!" Saya retorts as she turns to glare at the purple-haired samurai.
"Because I am a better fighter than you. And I am going there to protect him. Or, you believe you can do a better job at that compared to me?" Saeko asks as she narrows her eyes, seemingly getting a bit more 'agitated'...
(Ok, let's stop this now, before it blows out of proportion.)
"If you'll start gnawing at each other, I'm just going to recruit other people that I alr..."
"No." And both of them cut me off almost synchronically.
"Then start working together? If we start bickering while we are out there it will only make things harder." I respond as I point to the windowed wall with a stern voice...
"I'm looking at this in a way so I can make sure that I don't lose either of you." I add as I keep staring at the two girls.
"I, apologize. I let myself get carried away." Saeko responded as she placed both her feet on the floor, lowering her head slightly for a few seconds. Then turns to look at Saya. Along with me…
Saya, glanced at both of us, then hugged herself by wrapping her arms tighter under her chest…
"F, fine. Sorry…" She said in a low, slightly annoyed tone.
"As long as everybody in this room understands that all of us need to be focused in order to deal with any unexpected problems." I say as I let out a small sigh.
"So, as it's pretty obvious by now. Saeko, you're coming with me." I add as I turn to the purple-haired girl. Who responded with a nod.
"Saya, you are on coms?" I add as I turn to the moody pinkette.
"Why are you asking me?…" She asks back…
"..." I, just kept staring at her in silence…
"Ughh, fine, fine. I'll be at the coms…" She groans as she rolls her eyes, letting her hands fall to her thighs.
"Or, you know. You can both be at comms. And I can ask Rika…"
"ABSOLUTELY NOT!" Saya shouts as she turns to me.
"You sure? I mean, it's pretty obvious you don't want to be at coms." I ask.
"And how does that connect with what you just said?" She asks with an annoyed tone.
"Well, if it's so hard you can have Saeko to help. But I'm not crazy enough to go by myself. And Rika is the only other person I know here. Because you know, we're using her stuff." I respond.
"Hard? I never said that it's hard, I could do that crap with my eyes closed." Saya huffs.
"Perfect, you got the job. Saeko, with me then." I clap my hands and point at Saya, then at Saeko.
"Wha…" Saya blinks blankly at me a couple of times, then quickly shakes her head, and blinks at me blankly at me some more…
"So, the question is. Where 'are' we going to go?..." I ask as I turn to look towards the windowed wall..