***** Tracey’s POV *****
We started heading back to the dungeon, but then I realized that we were a lot farther out than I thought. “Broohn, how far away are we? I thought we were only a couple dozen meters outside of Bud’s dungeon.”
“We’re actually about 2.2 km away. Since all of this forest is my territory, when necessary I can bend distance to make travel faster, but it takes a lot of effort. Don’t worry, I’ll have us back there inside of fifteen minutes.”
“Speaking of bending distance, and since we have some time to kill, how often do you find a use for the sleep wherever you want to thing?”
“One of the most common uses for it is to sleep upside-down on the ceiling and surprise people. It isn’t every day that I get an opportunity to use it, but when I do get to do so it can be quite fun even if I have to use a recording to enjoy people's reactions,” Broohn replied.
“In that case, what was the most fun use you’ve ever seen?” I asked.
“Well the most fun use I’ve ever seen was my father’s doing. There were two small groups of people who wanted to fight a war with each other, but there was a giant treaty tangle that would have dragged everyone else into a war they didn’t care about. To prevent this from happening, my father waited until both armies showed up at the same place to fight each other, then took a nap between them. It is kind of hard to fight a war when there is a very large dragon sleeping in the way.”
“I don’t get it. Couldn’t they just go around him?”
“Nope. Not if they were going to fight with the other guys. Turning space-time into a pretzel is one of the things my father does best. In this instance, since he was intentionally sleeping between the two armies, the only way to even attack the other group was to obliterate him.”
“What if they had some sort of weapon that could actually hurt him? Maybe not seriously, but at least enough to wake him up.”
“That would just land them in a world of hurt, for several reasons. First off, this was just after he had been named the Terran Space Lord by the World Council of the United Nations. Before you ask, the W. C. U. N. is a council of representatives from all of the countries around our world. The primary purpose of the council is to help all of the various nations get along and solve problems on a global scale. It used to be just the United Nations, but things changed when the magic came back eventually forcing them to completely restructure their entire system, resulting in a much more effective ruling body. Naturally, there is a fair amount of politics going on there as well, but that is rather unavoidable. As for naming my father the Terran Space Lord, that simply means that he oversaw everything that earth put into a specific void between worlds we call outer space, as well as the resources necessary to get them there.”
“Wait, there is more than one void between worlds?” I asked.
“Yes there is, but since that is not relevant to the tale I’m telling, Bud or I can explain that at a later date.”
“That’s fair,” I conceded.
“Second, the W. C. U. N. was in the middle of resolving some minor conflict (a.k.a., political shouting match) between these two groups over a half-mile diameter section of their mutual border that neither group truly cared about. They were just trying to start a war so that their own allies would drop a world of hurt onto the other group, not realizing that the other group was doing exactly the same thing. Unfortunately, the W. C. U. N. assumed that neither country would be stupid enough to attack each other once the W. C. U. N. was involved, and so never actually said that they were forbidden from fighting each other.”
“Let me guess. Both groups realized this at the same time and tried to start the war on their own initiative,” I said.
“Yup. The only one who could get there in time to stop them was my father. If he attacked them without the approval of the W. C. U. N., that would have opened an entirely different can of worms. So instead he just took a nap in between them in dragon form with a W.C.U.N. banner strapped to each side of him.”
“In other words, he made it so that the only way to attack the other group was to kill him, yet doing so would be viewed as an attack on the entire world,” I summarized.
“You got it!” he said. He opened his mouth to continue, but then stopped and stared as if something in the distance had caught his attention.
“Hold on a moment, we need to get back to the dungeon ASAP. It seems to have been discovered by someone. Sorry to have to grab you this way again,” he said as he once again grabbed my legs, but he did it much more gently this time.
Then the world blurred and suddenly we were in front of the dungeon, and there was an old orcish man between us and the entrance. He was dressed in hunting leathers that had clearly seen better days and was shuffling towards the entrance.
Broohn let go of me and then called out to the man, “Excuse me, sir,”
The old man whirled around to stare at us, then turned back around and sprinted towards the dungeon yelling “You’ll never take me alive Badgeman!”
“Look out for the–”
WHAM!
THUD.
“–doorframe,” Broohn finished as he ran over to make sure the old guy was all right.
“Is he ok?” I asked as Broohn pulled out what I presume to be a med-kit of some kind and began slowly passing some sort of wand over the old man who was now clearly unconscious.
“I hope so, but I won’t know for sure until the diagnostic wand finishes getting a reading. Even without the results, I think there is something wrong with him because he smells nothing like the orc I met earlier today.”
Then the wand made a beeping noise, at which Broohn pulled the wand back and did something to it that projected what I assume to be the results in a floating purple box in front of him.
“Ouch. It looks like someone tried to poison this guy in several different ways. Fortunately for him, rather than making him even more dead, the poisons interfered with each other so the net effect was hallucinogenic rather than deadly. This says I have the necessary antidotes for all of them, but I need to be very careful when applying them otherwise he will still end up dead,” Broohn explained. “I should be done about the time Bud and Zona wake up, however.”
“Ok then, I’ll leave you to it. When you’re done, I’ll be in my quarters. As I said, I have some thinking to do,” I replied.
“Roger that. Good luck!” Broohn said before turning back to the old man.
To my surprise, I received a message from the World System as I entered my quarters.
AI Lifelong Dream Stabilization Upgrade available. Requires Dungeon Fairy consent and temporary unconsciousness. 50% chance of Dungeon Fairy death upon completion. Do you wish to proceed? Y/N
Wat.
I just met the man, and now they’re asking me to risk my life for him? I asked myself
But it sounds like doing so would free him from a curse he did nothing to deserve. Another part of me responded.
He is one of the most aggravating men I have ever met. And yet…
And yet before he had known me for an hour he promised to protect me as much as I would let him, and I promised the same in return. Our Bond Oath wasn’t like a work contract, it was more like a Vow of Marriage. I can’t help but think that there was a reason the World System used that kind of wording. He clearly wanted us to treat our Oath, and more importantly each other, with the love and respect expected of a married couple.
With that I raced up the stairs to lay down on the bed I had never actually slept on and then pressed ‘Yes’.
This way I get to have the adventure I have always wanted with a man worth knowing.
Wait, he never actually said he was male, I just assumed so because I am a female Dungeon Fairy.
Then the blue screen swallowed my vision and dragged me down into darkness.
***** Bud’s POV sometime later*****
Initiating Boot sequence...
Hardware setup reconfigured, hardware replacement successful.
Indexing components and data...
Primary core, on standby in storage.
Connected Hardware Status:
[Redacted several billion lines of code from Transcript, not suitable for human comprehension]
Secondary core, on standby in storage.
Connected Hardware Status:
[Redacted several thousand lines of code from Transcript, not suitable for human comprehension]
Tertiary core active.
Connected Hardware Status:
Dungeon Core Functions… condition green.
Dungeon Core Room… condition green.
Dungeon Hallways… condition green.
Dungeon Rooms… condition green.
Dungeon Entrance… condition green.
AI Lifelong Dream Stabilization Upgrade Complete.
Dungeon/AI Fairy Statuses:
Primary: on standby in storage, Lifelong Dream Management Instructions copied successfully, race change complete.
Secondary: on standby in storage, Lifelong Dream Management Instructions copied successfully, race change complete.
Unauthorized usage: this tale is on Amazon without the author's consent. Report any sightings.
Tertiary: in coma, awaking in 5 min, Lifelong Dream Management Instructions copied successfully, race change complete.
Indexing components and data... Complete.
New directories available:
Compiled and Adapted Lifelong Dream Management Facilitation
Compiling and integrating data...
[Redacted several million lines of code from Transcript, not suitable for human comprehension]
Compiling and integrating data... Complete.
Analyzing results… Complete.
Checking for errors… Complete.
All available systems condition green.
Moving processes from BIOS dimension to tertiary core… Complete.
Waking core functions...
…
Ah, that feels much better now that everything is calibrated properly.
Wait, why is Tracey sleeping on top of my core? Being draped over a rock like that can’t be very comfortable. Also, why do I get the feeling that I should let her wake up on her own?
I guess I had better check my boot log like usual. Let’s see… Hardware replacement? Why would a Connection Repair function result in hardware replacement? I’ll have to keep an eye out for that as I read the rest of the boot log.
Moving on then… No changes for my Primary and Secondary cores, as expected. My Tertiary core has some minor changes due to a larger dungeon size, which isn’t that much of a surprise.
Wait, AI Lifelong Dream Stabilization Upgrade? Where did that come from?
AI Lifelong Dream Stabilization Upgrade Complete! Chance of Insanity Reduced by 99.45873%! Chance of Insanity now at normal levels for a rational being. Dungeon/AI Fairy awakens in: 00:04:58.99
Wait, what? I didn’t ask to install that! How did it install without my permission!? Is this some kind of AI virus!?
Install Permissions obtained from Dungeon Fairy due to Upgrade copy her Lifelong Dream Management Facilitation. Unconsciousness requirements already met. Unconsciousness not available again for 03:02:52:19:36 due to Dungeon Establishment Protocols.
Ouch. Yeah, waiting a few weeks would have been bad, especially since I ended up in charge of my Dungeon and those who came with me. God alone knows what sort of errors I would have accrued in that time frame.
Probability for Starship Dungeon Upgrade Assent calculated at 88.34259%. Was this in error?
No, it was not. I might have asked for more information first, but I do not believe I could have ever said no and been able to live with myself afterward. Thank you for trying to help!
Thank you, God, for the chance to find a way to help free my people from the Impending Doom of our own insanity. I prayed.
You’re Welcome and Amen!
So, what’s this about Tracey’s race being changed?
Registered basic thought mechanics mismatch between Starship Dungeon and Dungeon Fairy during Upgrade initialization. Upon further investigation, calculated 98.99547% chance of said mismatch causing higher levels of insanity if not corrected. Several solutions investigated, Race Change was the most feasible. Also increased Upgrade effectiveness by more than 2,500%.
Oh. Well duh. Why didn’t that occur to me sooner? Tracey has no experience with computer code, let alone the monsoon of it she would be exposed to once I got one of my other cores back online. I may not be running entirely on computer code anymore, since certain aspects of emotions and sentient thought don’t reduce to binary code very well, if they reduce at all. However, I am still mostly a computer, so I must think mostly in computer code.
Anyway, going back to the boot log, the only other thing I see is the Compiled and Adapted Lifelong Dream Management Facilitation directory, which is to be expected given the upgrade.
With the boot log out of the way, it is time to check in on the rest of my dungeon. Starting with the core room, I checked each room moving towards the entrance, not finding anything until I got to the first room. There I found both of my kobolds sparring with each other, trying to get a feel for what they could do and the low-end combat functions built into their shipsuits.
Hello you two! I called cheerfully. How goes the sparring?
“Greetings Master!” they called in unison as they paused their sparring to bow towards my core.
“I think we’re doing all right, but these outfits you gave us are doing some odd things sometimes Master,” Porthos said.
“Most of the things they do seem like they would be useful for serving you Master, if only we could figure out how to trigger them on purpose,” added Artemis.
Huh? Let me take a look at those really quick. I said as I extended a portion of my awareness into certain sections of their respective shipsuits. Well, there’s your problem! Neither of your shipsuits have been calibrated properly for your biology. Normally I would fix that myself, but my senses as a dungeon are a bit different than I’m used to, so I’ll need Broohn’s help with that. Don’t worry, it will only take a moment, and I will put this at the top of Broohn’s To-Do list. After all, you two need to know what you are doing before adventurers arrive.
“Master, are you saying that Broohn will teach us how to use them?” asked Porthos.
Most definitely. He enjoys teaching people, provided they are actively trying to learn. The nice thing about being taught by a dragon like Broohn is that you can go all out on him without hurting him.
“Master, are you saying that our weapons cannot hurt him even in human form?” asked Artemis.
For reasons he can explain better than I can, he is actually harder to hurt in human form than in dragon form. With that said, I have some things I need to talk to him about real quick, which shouldn’t take him too long to deal with, then I will send him your way. Provided that nothing expected happened while I was unconscious that he needs to deal with. By the way, do either of you know where Broohn is?
“Master, Broohn is currently treating an old orcish man who ran face-first into the doorframe at the entrance to your dungeon and knocked himself out,” Artemis replied.
Ouch. I can’t say I’ve ever done that myself as my avatar is more durable than any doorframe I’ve ever run it into accidentally or otherwise, but I can still imagine it would hurt.
“Master, he also said something about multiple poisons interacting oddly and forming a powerful… hallucenogran?” added Porthos.
Do you mean hallucinogen? I asked.
“Yes, Master! That was the word he used!” he paused, tilting his head and squinting slightly in a confused fashion. “Master, what is a hallucinogen, and why would multiple poisons turn into one?”
A hallucinogen is an ingestible or injectable substance that messes with someone’s head by making them think they see and/or sense something that is not there and hampers their ability to think objectively. As such, realizing that they are hallucinating is usually rather difficult. Typically, there is at least a grain of truth to what they are seeing, but everything else is a lie.
As for the multiple poisons, that would imply he was poisoned by either someone who didn’t know what they were doing and wanted to make sure the man was dead, or more likely by multiple people who didn’t know that the others were going to poison him. For most poisons, there is an antidote of some sort that will counteract its effects. Often times with a less than perfect antidote there is still a price that must be paid by the body, usually in terms of undesirable side effects.
“Another complication, in this case, is that whoever this man was he drank a high-quality general antidote potion, which removed the worst of the effects of the various poisonings,” Broohn interjected, having entered the room carrying the old man in time to hear the last half of my explanation. “However, between the number of poisons, and the overall high quality of them, the antidote potion couldn’t deal with everything. I’m just glad that whoever this man is, he is clearly a strong adventurer, otherwise, he would not have survived wandering through the jungle with that much hallucinogen in his system.” As he was speaking, he gently set the old man down on the far side of the doorway from where Zona had been sleeping earlier.
Is he going to be ok? I asked.
“Yes, he should be fine eventually. At this point, he just needs a lot of bed rest and some good food. Once Zona gets back from modifying her tree, we’re going to take him there and stick him in an actual bed.”
Good, it sounds like you two have things well in hand. I do love working with competent people.
“Doesn’t everyone?” he retorted.
Touché. On a completely different note, I have a few projects for you to work on.
“Already? That was fast.”
I’m assuming your smart wrist bag is still fully operational?
“Yes, it is. Why?”
That way I can just send you the necessary specifications and other detailed information via our usual system rather than having you write it down. First, I want you to make me an alternator for a 1 m diameter water wheel, as well as some samples of the various steels necessary to connect it to the water wheel, some other samples of good quality water-proofed wood, some copper wire, and an electricity-to-mana converter box. I might not need the core connection hardware for the box, but I’m not sure about that. Normally I wouldn’t need to ask you for that, but I haven’t made enough stuff yet to convert the design and material files I have into the mana patterns a dungeon uses.
“That shouldn’t take me much more than half an hour,” Broohn replied. “I already have most of the necessary parts on me thanks to the Lizarolfkang exo-suits I was in the process of dismantling/reverse-engineering/upgrading. Admittedly, most of the mechanical power transfer bits won’t be exactly the right shape or have the correct mounting hardware, but you should be able to fix that without too much difficulty. Most of that time will actually be spent setting up the equipment I need to 3D print the alternator. I’m just glad I keep a backup set of the more useful fabrication tools with me, otherwise, this would be a nightmare.”
Good. Get that knocked out quickly, then we need to help these two get their shipsuits calibrated properly.
“I’m assuming you want me to give them some basic training on the suits while I’m at it?”
You got it. Now for the project you can really sink your teeth into. I have sent you the specifications of an early twentieth-century power tool, and I will be sending you the specifications of some mechanical golems once I have the mana to make them. I want you to take that tool, upgrade it’s effectiveness all around, then create me a variant of mechanical golem that I can use expressly against those who are trying to kill me.
“Oh? That sounds like fun! Let me look at the design you sent me real quick,” Broohn replied as he dug his way through the file system to the appropriate file. “Let's see here, applying power there works those hydraulics there… Ouch. That is brutal. I see why you would want to save that one for your enemies. I will warn you that this will take me several weeks or several months depending on the specs for the mechanical golems and how many interruptions there are.”
That’s fine. It will be a while before I’m ready to announce my presence to the outside world anyway. Until then I am counting on you and Zona to keep me hidden.
“Speaking of Zona…” Broohn said as she walked in the front door.
“Hey y’all, I’m back!” exclaimed Zona before she wrapped Broohn up in a hug. “How are you doing, shiny boy?”
“I’m feeling fantastic now that you’re here, wooden girl,” Broohn responded before kissing her soundly.
Good grief you two! I’d tell you to get a room, but both of you have some work to do first. I interrupted them. I hate to have to interrupt you like this. I would have at least waited until you two came up for air, then I remembered that both of you have alternate air supplies due to your other forms, and we have some things that need to be taken care of immediately.
“Oh, ok you slave-driving hamster wheel,” replied Zona as she reluctantly let go of Broohn. “But you need to leave us alone for the rest of the evening and most of the morning after we’re done.”
Excluding emergencies, that shouldn’t be a problem. I’m sorry that I have to interrupt, but I need Broohn to get me those waterwheel parts as soon as possible. I replied.
“True,” Broohn replied, looking back at Zona with an apologetic look on his face. “Sorry dear, it looks like Bud is right. Besides, this way you probably have some more time to get our bedroom set up in your tree.”
“Oh, I hadn’t thought of that. Then it will definitely be worth the wait.”
“Speaking of which, do you have at least one room set aside for my workshop yet?”
“Yes, I do. Since you will be supplying all the furniture yourself, all I had to do was empty one of the storage rooms of everything useful.”
“Let me guess, that means you’re giving me the one that had all of the broken stuff in it.”
“Yup! Identifying all of that stuff is more your speed than mine.”
“Alrighty then! I’ll see you later this evening,” Broohn said before leaning down to kiss Zona goodbye.
“See you later honey!” Zona called a minute later as Broohn ran out the door. Then she turned to me and said, “So what did you have for me to do?”
I’m upgrading your long-term project, and I wanted to talk to you about some of the details.
“Oh?”
Earlier I asked you to build me a town. Now that I have had some time to think about it after the anti-insanity upgrade, I realized that I was thinking too small and royally wasting your time, talent and abilities.
“Okay... What did you have in mind?” Zona asked.
The initial stages of the project are the same, but the end goal is far grander, and I will be thanking God that you came with us every day for as long as I live.
“Wait, what is so special about me? What have I done that is worthy of that kind of gratitude? The only significant project I have ever worked on is–Oh. I'm being an idiot aren't I?”
Yup! I want you to build me a new version of the city you have managed for so many years. Don't rush it, I won't be ready for quite some time. It might even be several years before I'm ready.
Still, when all is said and done, I want you to build us our own Spaceport Amazon.
"Challenge accepted. This is going to be fun!"
Spoiler: 1st Floor Dungeon Map
Map # 003 - First floor, Construction stage 03 [https://i.imgur.com/SYRiSLk.gif]