Lunar urges everyone into the lift and presses a button labelled ‘canteen.’ The lift door slides shut and we all feel the lift lurch sideways before whooshing upwards. I hold Star tightly in my arms, trying to comfort her as she whimpers from the awful motions of the lift. Finally, the lift stops and the doors swing open. We all step out into a gleaming canteen, taking in the bright lights and shiny tables.
“Lunchtime,” Lunar says with a smile. We all take our seats around the table, eagerly anticipating what’s to come. Suddenly, we’re treated to a comical sight as a procession of little trucks trundle towards us, carrying platters of appetising food and drinks. The kids let out excited gasps at the sight.
Everyone starts to pick out their favourite foods from the platters that have been brought over. I know that Star likes her steaks rare, so I carefully select a blood rare slab of meat for my little ogre-girl. Star’s eyes light up as she sees the juicy steak on her plate. She picks it up in both hands and takes a big bite, savouring the taste. I load my own plate with crisp chicken wings.
After everyone has finished eating, I take a damp cloth and gently wipe the food off Star’s green face. Star beams up at me as I clean her up.
Lunar stands up and addresses the group. “I have an activity planned for Mica and Star,” she announces. “Each girl will go with just her favourite parent to the jelly swamp level.” I swallow hard and exchange a glance with Mica’s parents. We all know that I am Star’s favourite parent.
Lunar turns to Mica. “Who do you want to go with for the jelly swamp level activity?”
Mica ponders for a moment before answering that she will go with her dad. Lunar urges the four of us to change into wellies and waterproofs. I select a pair of little purple boots for Star. Then Lunar leads the four of us into the lift and presses the button labelled ‘jelly swamp.’ The lift doors slide shut and the lift lurches sideways before beginning its descent.
Mica’s eyes light up with excitement as the lift starts to move downwards. “We’re going down!” she exclaims.
I hold Star close in my arms, gently rubbing her back to soothe her nerves about being in the lift. Fortunately we soon come to a stop and the doors slide open, revealing the jelly swamp level. We step out into ankle deep gelatinous slime that squelches with every step we take. I hold Star’s hand as she wrinkles her shiny green nose at the squishy slime underneath her boots.
At this point, Lunar divides the group, sending Mica and her dad down one path and me and Star down another. As we part ways, Lunar turns to me and gives a warning. “There’s a frog in the swamp,” she says. “A little racist frog.”
I raise an eyebrow at her, puzzled by such a strange warning. “What exactly does this frog do?”
“Wait and see,” says Lunar.
Well that clarifies nothing at all. I hold Star’s hand tightly as we make our way through the jelly swamp, carefully stepping over patches of slime and avoiding any potentially dangerous creatures. Star looks up at me with a smile, her eyes wide with curiosity as we explore the strange environment together. As we trudge through the swamp, my little green girl chatters away to me, her strident little voice breaking the silence of our surroundings. She points out different creatures and plants that catch her eye. “Daddy, look at that one!” she says, pointing. I look where my daughter is pointing and see a small hopping creature that resembles a sphere with a smiley face. “Wow, that’s cute!” I chuckle at the thing’s cheerful expression. “I wonder what it is?”
As we trudge through the jelly swamp, we come across a pink rock sticking out of the slime. Suddenly, a frog leaps out of the swamp and belches at us. To my surprise, it starts to talk in a croaky parody of a human voice. “Only amphibians are allowed in the swamp,” it says. It must be the racist frog Lunar warned me about. The frog continues to croak at me, it’s belches forming words: “amphibians only, no reptiles and certainly no humans.” How weird!
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Star scrunches her shiny green nose in semi-disgust as the frog continues to talk.
“It’s talking,” Star says, clearly not impressed by the little amphibian’s attitude. My daughter’s expression of mild revulsion is so adorable, the way she wrinkles her little nose like that!
The frog continues its ranting: “What is this? How can a human man have a green daughter? You are a cuckolded boob, that’s what you are. You are too stupid to see that she is not our daughter.”
I feel a hot, sick surge of fury at the slimy little frog’s suggestion that Star is not my daughter! Ridiculous as it may seem, the amphibian somehow knew how to push my buttons. I try to swipe at the frog, but it easily hops out of the way and mocks me in its raspy little voice: “Hey, watch it! Hot blooded fool! You can’t catch me. I am a superior amphibian.”
The frog hops off the rock and back into the jelly swamp, disappearing into the slime. Hopefully it doesn’t show up again. The swamp ahead is a little deeper, so I pick up Star and carry her to solid ground, away from the bigoted frog.
On firm ground, a plateau with grey blue grassy vegetation, I set Star down and she looks up at me, her brown eyes wide. She tilts her head slightly. “Daddy, why did the frog talk like that?”
“The frog is mean and says unkind things,” I explain gently. “It doesn’t like us because we’re not frogs.”
Star thinks for a moment and then grins up at me. “Let’s find the nice creatures then, Daddy,” she says cheerfully.
I smile at my daughter’s optimism. “Good idea. Let’s find some friendly creatures to play with.”
I lead Star forward through the jelly swamp, passing more pink rocks until I see a tall blue tree in the distance and make towards it. We reach a clearing with the tree in the centre. The clearing is filled with beautiful flowers. Star’s eyes widen in wonder as she sees the colourful butterflies flitting around the blooms. “Wow!” she exclaims, her voice full of awe.
Star kicks off her little boots and runs up to the tree. With superhuman speed and agility, she scrambles up the trunk. Her ogre heritage allows her to move with a grace beyond human capability. She looks down at me from her perch high up in the tree, her green face wreathed in smiles. I cannot climb like that, so I cannot follow her up there. I gather some colourful flowers from the clearing and carefully weave them together to create a little crown. I hold it up for Star to see and she shinnies down the tree trunk. I place the flower crown on her head. “There. You look like a princess now.”
Star giggles with joy and looks up with a big smile, her eyes sparkling with happiness. “Thank you, Daddy!”
I smile warmly down at her, feeling a glow of pride and contentment.
And then I hear a most unwelcome sound – a miserable, croaking little voice: “She is no princess. She looks like a little troll.”
I have just about had enough of the wretched frog…
The frog continues croaking at me in a voice dripping with disdain. “And trolls are ugly and stupid too.”
Star frowns sadly and looks up at me, her brown eyes shimmering. “Is… Am I ugly, Daddy?”
I kneel down in front of her and gently cup her green face in my hands. “No, sweetheart,” I say firmly. “You are beautiful and perfect just the way you are.” I kiss her green forehead tenderly, showing her how much I love and accept her. Out of the corner of my eye, I notice the frog puffing up with rage. It’s enraged when I show that I love my daughter? Well then…
I pick Star up and kiss her green nose. The words spill out of my mouth without my even thinking about it. “I love you more than anyone else in the world,” I say, meaning every word. I realise how true my words are. I love Star more than I love Tabbie. I love Star even more than my own need to continue living.
Star gazes at me with soft brown eyes. Meanwhile, I notice the frog swelling larger still in anger. But then suddenly there’s a loud puncture sound and air rushes out of the frog as it deflates like a balloon and falls back into the jelly swamp.
I hold Star close to me, feeling her small body pressed against mine. I can see that she feels safe and secure in my arms and it brings me a sense of contentment. I know that my daughter trusts me fully and my heart feels full to bursting with a deep sense of love and protectiveness.
At that moment, as swarm of those little green balls with smiley faces come splashing out of the jelly swamp. “You have passed the test,” they squeak in unison. “Love defeats the racist frog.”
So… this was all a test. How surreal.