The gathering broke up piece by piece. There were more than a few small, empty cups on the table when Petra rose, most of them in front of her. She swayed just a little as she stood. Her excuse for leaving was that she had things to take care of before bed, but she’d been getting steadily more emotional, and Ana figured that she just didn’t want the others to see her cry. Then Sendra and Dil took off. They both had work in the morning.
Messy didn’t really seem like she wanted to go, but Kaira had a whispered word with her and she nodded unhappily.
“Come by the shop anytime,” Messy said, giving Ana’s shoulder a quick squeeze on the way out, which somehow turned into a hug. “I really want to see those earrings on you.”
“Yeah, I’ll… yeah.”
Once she was gone it was only Ana, Kaira and Rayni left.
“Think I could have a word with Ana, Ray?” Kaira asked, looking across the table. “Like, private?”
“Yeah. If I can have her once you’re done.”
“Deal.”
“Do I get any say in this?” Ana asked as Rayni rose.
“Sure,” the Huntress said. “Ana, do you want to talk to Kaira?”
“Yeah, I guess.”
“Do you want to talk to me?”
“Sure.”
“Is there anything you need to say to both of us?”
“Not really.”
“In that case, I’ll be over there,” Rayni gestured toward a corner where two men and a woman sat. They waved to her. “Come over, and we’ll talk once you and Kaira are done.” With that, she left.
Ana wasn’t sure exactly what was going on, but she’d had three or possibly four — no more than five — little cups of rose-scented paint-thinner, so she figured that had something to do with it.
“What’d you say to Messy?” she asked Kaira when they were alone.
“I told her that she was unlikely to get anywhere tonight, and that you’d had too much to drink, anyway.”
Ana blushed. “Right. Not gonna happen, anyway. Shit, I really need to talk to her.”
“Probably, yeah. That’s not what I wanna talk about, though. You remember what we talked about in the Delve?”
“You wanna, what, recruit me?”
Kaira grinned. “Pretty much, yeah. Though you need to mellow out a little. Frontliners need to be steady, you know?”
“Yeah. I got carried away. Wasn’t planning on doing that again.”
“Pretty sure no one plans on getting carried away. Anyway, I was going to talk to Tor and Omda about taking you out with us next time. Only, now there’s some rumblings about Falk putting together an expedition to deal with whatever got Med and Jay. A real kill-team. Like, every combat Classer in the outpost right now. Which you aren’t. Officially.”
“Right, yeah. Meaning?”
“Meaning we’ll probably be heading out for a few days, and then we’ll want to rest and recover for another few. So it’ll be a week at least before us three, or four if I have my way, head out on our own. But before I talk to them, I’ve got to ask: are you interested?”
“Maybe? Uh, probably. Yeah.”
“We’d have to tell them about you. I don’t like that you kept your abilities from us until now. That was a shit thing to do, and I’d be pissed if you hadn’t performed so well. And saved Deni’s life. But I’m not gonna ask the boys to go out with you under false pretenses.”
“Fair, yeah. I get that. And I don’t know how long it’s gonna be a secret, anyway. I choked out some thug when me and Sendra were getting Touanne, and I don’t know if his buddies are going to run their mouths, or what.”
Kaira’s eyes went so wide that Ana saw pink around them. “You did what?”
“Yeah, some shit named Wally or something was trying to squeeze Deni and Dil, looking for me. Tried to shake me down when I showed up. Wanted to know where that Ranger asshole is. I told him to go fuck himself and choked him out.”
“You… Wait, Wally? Waller? I think I recognize that name. Kinda big guy, short hair, like… level 8 or 9 or so Fighter?”
“Yeah, that’s the guy.”
“Huh. I’ve met the guy, once or twice. I thought he was pretty polite.”
“Makes sense. Guy’s a coward and a bully. He’s not going to mess with someone who can pop his head or put a smoking hole through him from fifty yards.”
Kaira thought about that, then gave Ana one of her sharktooth grins. “I guess, yeah.”
“So was that all you wanted to talk about? You guys going out, and me joining later?”
“That, and… how’re you doing, Ana?”
“Pretty good. I’m getting levels quickly, and I’ve got money to keep myself going for a while.”
“Yeah, that’s great and all, but what about, like… how’re you doing? You’ve been through some bad shit these past few days, right? You got pulled away from home, the kid you were with died, you almost got killed, several times, you, ah…” Kaira lowered her voice and leaned in closer, “you killed some people, right? I mean, how are you, after all that?”
How was she supposed to answer that? The answer was that she was pretty much as fine as she ever was, but by normal people standards that would be cause for concern. But was there any point in putting this off? Maybe it was the paint thinner talking, but Kaira and the others needed to know sooner or later. Why not now?
She copied Kaira, leaning forward and meeting her so that they were a foot apart at the center of the table.
“Kaira. Kay? Irry? Tor called you Irry, right?”
“Yeah, right.”
“Can I call you Irry?”
“Sure.”
“Great. All right, Irry. You’re probably going to figure this out sooner or later, if both our Connections keep going up and we keep hanging out, so I’ll just tell you. Here’s the deal: I’m fine. Not, like, ‘I’m barely hanging on and I’m putting on a brave face.’ Not, ‘I’ll pull through and deal with it in time.’ I’m fine. I’m going to go to bed tonight, and I’m not going to be reliving whatever happened to me since I got here. I’m going to be thinking about what to say to Messy, and if I should eat these Crystals I’ve got to get to level 8, or if I should sell some of them for extra cash instead. Now, I wish that I’d known and that I’d been able to burn the bodies. Nic deserved better than to just be left in the forest like that, and if they all got possessed or whatever and that’s what got Medecilia and Jancia, well, that’s just fucking unnecessary. And I almost got killed, but I didn’t. I’m not going to lose any sleep over any of those things. Do you understand?”
Kaira turned her head a little, as though looking at me differently would make my words clearer. “You… don’t care?”
“I care. I’d prefer if Nic was still alive. I wish I hadn’t needed to kill anyone. I hate killing people. It’s such a waste. And I hope that I’m not partially responsible for what happened to Tellak’s friends, for various reasons. And sometimes the pressure builds up to the point where I need to lie down and cry for a while, so I do, and then I’m done. I’m not walking around being sad about it. I don’t blame myself. I don’t really feel things like that. At all. And if that makes you reconsider your offer, well… I get it. It wouldn’t be the first time.”
“Shit, that’s… It’s messed up, honestly. But I also kind of envy you? Sounds nice.”
Ana sighed. “It can be. It’s just annoying when an interesting friendship ends because the other person gets scared, or decides that I’m ‘a heartless monster,’ or something like that.”
“Yeah, I get that. One of the people I ran with before I met Tor and Om broke it off because I’m an ‘insane, blast-happy bitch.’ I know the feeling. Kind of.”
“Kind of,” Ana agreed. “So, you’re still interested?”
“Yeah. Don’t see what difference it would make for your effectiveness in the group, unless you’d just decide to abandon us because that’s more convenient or something. You wouldn’t do that, would you?”
“No, I wouldn’t.” She was pretty sure that she couldn’t for that matter. “How do you think Tor and Omda would take it? I don’t think I’ll want to be in a team with them if they’re not comfortable with the real me.”
“Omda would take it in stride. Tor… I don’t think that he’d understand, but he wouldn’t look down on you or anything. He’s all about giving everyone a chance and all that.”
“In that case, if you all go out with Falk, like you think, you can talk to them. Then we can all meet once you’re back, and I’ll tell them what they need to know.”
A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.
“All right.” Kaira sat back down. Ana stood.
“Thanks, Irry. For understanding, and for looking out for me ever since I got here. I’m going to talk to Rayni now, all right?”
“All right. I’ll just…” Kaira raised her half-full mug of ale.
“Yeah. Good luck out there, if I don’t see you.”
“Same.”
Rayni was sitting with her friends, all human like most people in the outpost and a mix of Classes and levels, having a conversation about nothing interesting. It sounded like gossip to Ana. Whatever it was, the Huntress had found a smile somewhere. She glanced towards Ana as she approached and their eyes met, and rather than waving Ana over Rayni got up, leaving her drink on the table as a clear, “I’ll be back.”
“Step out?” Rayni asked softly as she got close, nodding towards the backdoor. Ana shrugged and headed that way, with Rayni following.
“So,” Rayni asked in the small yard behind the inn, “were you serious about heading out? Us two together, I mean?”
“I was, yeah.”
“You want to try hunting demons, just the two of us?”
“Those, and anything else you’d normally hunt. I need Crystals. I need levels, and I need cash, and I can’t think of any faster way of getting them than being out there.”
“All right.” Rayni studied Ana in thoughtful silence. “Here’s my offer. We go out, and we do what I’d normally do. You basically tag along. You provide your own gear and supplies, and you do your best not to spoil my hunting. Anything we harvest is mine to keep. If I sense a demon that I think us two together could take down, we go for it, and anything we harvest from that, we split. While we’re out, I’ll try to teach you some Skills. Stealth, Tracking, Harvesting, like you said. Maybe Archery and Axes if we have time. That way you’ll get something out of it no matter what. Does that work for you?”
“I’ll need some help with the gear. I’m not sure what I’ll need.”
“Yeah, sure. I’ll do my supplies tomorrow morning, anyway. We’ll get you the essentials and double up on rations and other consumables. Probably an extra potion or two from Touanne, too, just in case.”
Ana was about to reply when Rayni suddenly grinned and shook her head. “Can’t believe I tried to blackmail you. Sorry about that. Fucking embarrassing, honestly.”
“Yeah, well, panic makes us do stupid shit sometimes. Is your danger sense still going off?”
“Big time, yeah. But not, like, imminent danger. And I’ve got a couple of stiff ones in me and another one lined up, so it’s all good. I’m loose and ready to make bad decisions!”
Ana snorted. “Yeah, well. If you’re gonna change your mind tomorrow, do it before I spend any money, will you?”
“Not gonna back out. I don’t do that.”
“I’ll hold you to that.”
----------------------------------------
The next morning Petra was up, looking like hell warmed over and serving breakfast. She gave Ana a nod as she grabbed her tea and porridge. Not unfriendly in any way, just tired and in a low mood, though she brightened just a fraction when Ana took the opportunity to pay for her room for another week.
“Half price,” Petra reminded her as Ana put seven silver coins on the counter. “I meant it. I’m not accepting full price from you.”
“Make it two weeks, then.”
“That, I can do.” Petra snatched the coins off the counter and went off to write in her ledger.
Ana found Omda by the window where he usually sat. He greeted Ana with a grunt, and they ate in silence until Omda broke it.
“Kaira told us yesterday,” he said. “Bad business. Good job.”
“Thanks,” she answered, and that was it.
When Rayni showed up Ana excused herself, greeted the Huntress, and retrieved her pack from her room. She’d prepared it the night before, packing most of what she owned, with her gun going back in the belt pouch she’d been using on the Delve.
“So,” she said to Rayni. “Supplies?”
“Supplies,” Rayni agreed, and they set off through the mostly empty streets.
Rather than the Exchange, Rayni took them to an outfitter’s. Despite the very early hour, Rayni guaranteed that the place would be open. “Delvers like to go out early,” she said, “and a lot of Delvers are shit at planning.” Other than dried foodstuffs they picked up whatever Ana needed, without doubling up on larger camping gear. There was no need for her to get her own tent, pots, or anything like that. Tools, though? You could always double up on tools.
With some money in her purse and Crystals in Storage, Ana went for quality. It all cost her a couple of gold, but it would be worth it if it spared her a snapped knife or kept her a little more comfortable at night. Bad steel or a leaky ground cloth just weren’t worth saving a couple of coins.
When they had all their gear and supplies, they headed to Touanne’s.
Touanne’s door was locked, but Rayni rang the bell with the same motivation as at the outfitter's. And, sure enough, there were steps and a rattle on the other side as the door unlocked. The face that greeted them wasn’t Touanne, though, but Tellak, who locked eyes with Ana the moment they saw each other.
“Mornin’,” she said, her voice heavy with fatigue. She didn’t look like she’d slept, but she also didn’t look like she was on the edge of emotional collapse.
“Morning,” Ana said. “Feel any better?”
“A little, yeah. Thanks for dragging me over here.”
“Is Touanne in?”
“Sleeping. I finally got her to bed a few hours ago.” She looked at Rayni, then their gear. “You’re, uh… Rayni, right? You were at the baths, last night. One of the group who brought in Jay?”
“Right,” Rayni said, awkwardly offering her hand.
Tellak grasped it firmly, wrist to wrist. “Thank you. All of you. If I’d lost both of them, I— Thank you.”
“Sure, yeah. Just happy we got there in time.”
Tellak nodded, giving Rayni’s hand another pump before letting go.
“Come on in, both of you. Touanne really needs her sleep, but I can get you whatever you need. You can just leave the money on the counter.”
With Tellak’s help they grabbed two healing potions each, as well as one each of some kind of general purpose poison-antidote-slash-antivenom.
“Put down a gold each,” Rayni suggested. “I know it’s a bunch but Touanne always undercharges.”
“I thought you needed the money?” Ana countered.
“I do. But she’s given me enough discounts and free healing that I’ll come out on top anyway. May as well tip the balance a little when she can’t protest.”
As they were leaving, Tellak stopped Ana. “Listen,” she said. “Touanne told me that you’d be interested in testing for an aptitude with the Craft of Earth. Come find me when you two get back, and I’ll help you out.”
Ana processed for a moment, then it clicked. “You’re the friend she mentioned? The Earth mage?”
“I’m a melee caster, yeah. Earth Craft, Metal specialist. So if you’re interested, like I said, just come find me. I don’t know how I’ll ever thank you all for helping Jay, but at least it would be a start.”
“Yeah, I’ll take you up on that,” Ana said, and they left.
With the potions taken care of, they were really ready to go. But there was one more thing Ana wanted to take care of first.
“Rayni,” she said reluctantly. “Do you know where I can find Messy?”
----------------------------------------
Ten minutes later they stood outside a shop. It didn't look like any jeweler’s that Ana had ever seen. No large display windows, for one. But after a false start and a little backtracking, Rayni was sure that they had the right place.
She hadn’t been annoyed at Ana’s request. Amused, if anything. But now they were there, and the place was clearly not open, and Ana’s relief was matched by Rayni’s undisguised disappointment.
“All right,” Ana said once they’d waited a few minutes. “I tried. Too bad. Let’s—”
“Ana?”
Rayni’s face lit up, splitting in an expectant grin, as Ana perked up at hearing Messy’s voice in the distance. The voice lit a little warm, comforting spark in her, but she schooled herself and turned.
Messy was coming down the street, dressed in a sensible skirt and blouse, bright and cheery and ready for work. “Morning, Mess,” Ana called, suddenly nervous. What the hell was with that? Sure, maybe this wasn’t the ideal time or situation to let someone down easy, but it was certainly nothing to feel weird about.
Messy smiled at them as she approached. “Morning, Rayni. Ana, how are you?” Then she seemed to notice their gear for the first time, and her eyebrows rose in a silent question.
“We’re heading out again,” Ana said. “Rayni’s going to show me some tricks. See if we can bag a weaker demon or two.”
So don’t wait for me, she thought, but the words wouldn’t come. Don’t expect me to come around so you can flirt with me more. Don’t expect anything out of me that I can't give you.
“Really? Just the two of you? That’s brave.” Messy looked at Ana with open admiration, then came in close and straightened the collar of Ana's tunic.
“...yeah. Thanks,” Ana said lamely. “I just thought you should know. Since you asked me to come over.”
She could hear Rayni choking back a laugh behind her.
“That’s so thoughtful,” Messy said. She hesitated, then quickly leant in and pecked Ana on the cheek. “There. Kiss for luck!”
Ana stood polaxed. Her mind went blank for a moment. She had no idea what to do. Then, for some unfathomable reason, she felt herself smile, said, “Thanks! See you,” and started walking away.
Past the ringing in her ears she heard Rayni say a few quick words, tinged with laughter, before the Huntress followed.
“Gods beyond!” Rayni giggled as she caught up. “Are you always this awkward around your crushes?”
“I don’t…” Ana started to protest, then sighed. “What was that? All I wanted to do was to tell her that I’m not interested.”
“Oh, yeah. Clearly. Makes perfect sense. That’s why you haven’t been able to look at her without smiling ever since you saved her life in the Delve.”
“That’s not true.”
“Oh, please! It’s clear as a mountain spring! I wish you could see yourself, the way you shine whenever you talk to her.” She gave Ana’s shoulder a squeeze. “Frankly, it’s adorable.”
Ana shrugged her off. “You’re wrong. I’m not interested in her. I don’t get crushes. It doesn’t happen. And before you get any ideas, I don’t want to sleep with her, either.”
“Yeah, well, being around her clearly makes you feel some kind of good.”
Ana thought for a while as they approached the duskward gate. The Living Daylights had gone south. Ana and Rayni had quickly decided that they were not. “Could it be her Skills and Attributes?” she finally asked.
“Nah. Sure, she’s a Jeweler, and she’s elfin, and she’s herself. She’s got great Charm and Charisma. But I didn’t see you making doe-eyes at Dilmik, who’s got nearly the same levels.” With a gentle pressure on the shoulder Rayni stopped Ana, and turned her so they faced each other. “You like Mestendi. It’s that simple. Not saying you want to marry her or sleep with her or whatever, but you like her. No doubt. So, uh… talk to her. ‘Cause I don’t know what she’s hoping for, but the way she looks at you I’m guessing it’s more than you’re ready to give right now.”
“Damn it,” Ana muttered. “Thanks.”