"They've left me," I whispered. "The guardians left me because I am unworthy ..."

Above me the orbs vanished, and I looked towards the forest where a large, four-legged silhouette stood beneath moonlight, watching. It sat on the edge of the forest, turned on its paws, and headed back inside.

"Panchu," I said, lifting my eyes. "I have until the high moon to be chosen … I must convince him that I am worthy!"

I collected my spear and was off to the woods, using the moonlight as my guide and my clock, knowing that it was a race against time. I passed through the threshold between my village and the forest. I knelt down, looking for the trail left behind by the beast. Broken branches. paw prints. Anything.

"Where did he go?" I whispered, checking a group of trees for any fur that may have been left behind. "He's vanished … likely gone into spirit form."

I held my spear point forward and walked deeper into the woods. The thicket above made it impossible to see in front of me. Darkness had swept over the forest like a cloak, concealing everything for hundreds of miles.

"Water." I thought. "Panchu has traveled far … the guardian will likely head for the spring." It was my only hope. If not there, I'd be lost. I knew that trail, even in the darkness. I'd traveled it several times over the years in the heat of the sun and the eye of the moon. The trail was used often enough that the ground was beaten, and snaked through the woods, between and over trees, up hills, and around streams and creek beds.

Moonlight found it's way through clearings in the trees, and I was able to maintain my heading, finding the points that marked the trail. Past the Old Oak that was as wide as the long river, past the boulder that looked like a sleeping cub, and around the beaver dams that ran along the river.

The walk felt longer alone and in the dark. And creatures were stirring within the thicket, walking on trees and scurrying through bushes, even calling in high howls and low hoots that ran shivers down my spine.

After an hour, I reached the falls that flushed over the mountainside, and into the pool where Vhiva lurked. Moonlight gave the water a sparkle unlike the sun, a bluish-white sparkle that was calming to my eyes.

I walked along the springs, searching for any sign of life. Trying to keep on my tippy toes to keep from scaring away any spirits that may be trying to fill their bellies and quench their thirst. I knelt near a tree and concealed myself in a bush, hoping I would not be discovered by anything. A slight breeze was in the air that brought a chill off the water, and carried the mist from the falls.

I peaked upward, seeing the moon arcing towards its peak. Nearly there. My time running out. "I have to find a guardian ... I just have to—"

Suddenly, from across the pools I heard a bush shake, and in an instant, a giant, four-legged silhouette appeared, nearly twice the size of any common grizzly. It pivoted it's head before stepping into the moonlight. Cautious though it seemed unafraid. Why should it be? This beast looked like it was the chief of the forest, and could tear anything that challenged it.

"Panchu?"

The silhouette moved towards the springs, and when it reached the moonlight it's body began to form. A large snout. Black eyes. Rounded ears, and thick fur ... no ... it was not fur on it's back. But long pronged hairs that stuck up, sharp as pins. The beast waddled to the spring. Stopped, and lifted its nose. It turned his head in my direction.

"Come out, boy ... or I'll chase you out." The bearpine's voice thundered and growled. "I have no time for tribling games ... unless you're here to test my claws against your spear?"

I stepped out from the bush, standing tall, chin high, and chest out. "Great Panchu ... I am Kai of the Tocagee village, and I am here to seek you as my guardian."

The beast chuckled, eyeing my frame. "You've come to ask me? Why?" He snarled. "Because you were unworthy? Shaman do not pick their guardians ..."

The words sent an ache in my chest, but I didn't allow myself to falter. "I am a worthy, Great Panchu ... I believe The Great Spirit had the other guardians pass on me so I could find you."

The bears lips curled and the moonlight highlighted fangs three times the size of any arrowhead. Fangs that tore through much flesh, and could easily tear through my own. I swallowed, but continued to keep the fear inside from showing on my face.

Panchu took a few steps closer, taking another breath. I narrowed my eyes, notizing the white haze in the beasts black orbs. It sniffed the air and took three large steps in my direction.

"You're blind ..."

He stopped. "In the eyes, yes ... though they are not the only way to see you. I can smell your fear ... its a stink that lingers on your flesh ... why?"

I lowered my head and took a breath through my nostrils. "There is strength in fear, if one chooses to find it." I said confidently. "I do not wish to hide my fear from you."

"Oh. But you do. alAnd you are." He laughed in a low, growl. "And the more you hide it, the more you make it known." He shook his head and turned back towards the spring. "Go home, tribling ... You are not worthy of becoming a shaman … it is why the other's passed you up."

I rolled my finger into fist. "Why?" I snapped. "Why am I unworthy over the others? I am the greatest young warrior of my village … the quickest learner … and strongest—"

"Yet your fear is your weakness." He stood over a pool, swaying his snout from side-to-side. He quickly whipped his paw and tore a fish from the pool. It flopped on land, until the beast jaws gave it rest. A small, glowing blue orb rose from the fish and floated through the trees back towards the life force. "And you wear it on you like a coat of fur … you must have confidence in one self, and you don't."

"I am confident." I said, taking a step towards the beast. My eyebrows furrowed. "Everybody in my village knows this."

The beast let out a long, low chuckle. And in one bite, had the fish torn then swallowed. He turned back and looked at me. "They've built your confidence … it was never earned."

My jaw fell open and I took a step back, squeezing my spear, my muscles trembling. "And what do you know about confidence? I know your tale. You abandoned your shaman—"

The bearpine turned and roared, "and that's exactly why I know, tribling!" He swiped a claw at the dirt, and I took a second step away. My heart beating into my throat. "Even blind, I've seen what the lack of confidence brings … what fear does to a young shaman. Hate. Jealousy. And evil. That is where your path will bring you."

I waved my spearhead. "You lie! I would never give into darkness."

Panchu raised his snout towards the moon. "Then what will you do? The moon is nearly at its peak, and you have no guardian. The shadow territory is the only place for you now, boy."

I clenched my teeth and trembled, then dropped my head. I whispered, "You and the others are wrong about me … even The Great Spirit is wrong … and I'll prove myself, if not this year then the next."

His lips curled and he chuckled. "For your sake boy, I hope you're right." Panchu turned towards the woods, and without another word, walked to the treeline where he disappeared into the thicket.

I collapsed to my knees, dropped my spear, and beat my fist into the dirt, cursing at the top of my lungs. I screamed towards the moon. I sat there and closed my eyes, listening to the water that plunged into the spring. The gentle beat of water kept pace with my heart, and for the time I felt peace return to my spirit.

I could wait until next year. I was only fifteen. I had until my seventeenth spirit ceremony to become a shaman. That gave me two more chances to conquer my fears. "I can wait ... I can be patient."

I heard a rustle behind me, and I whirled around, raising my spear.

This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

"Or, you can give your soul up to a grim," a slithery, raspy voice said. "That it was most smart shamans with your fear would do." The creature snickered.

I frowned, "who are you?"

Two fiery red eyes floated in the darkness only twenty paces away. I shivered, tightening my grip on the spear. The smell of carrion in the air. I gagged and held my breath.

"I am Xukai, a lesser grim, but with you we could be great." He hissed. "Bound your spirit to mine and together we can make the world ours."

"Never!" I said, pushing my speartip towards him. "I will never give into darkness!"

He snickered. "Never say never, boy ... cause you never know when you will need to take another path."

I shook my head, "My path does not belong with you."

The creature hissed, "And it seems it does not belong with a guardian neither." The creature looked to the moon. "You still have time to obtain true power."

"Never!" I yanked back my arm and threw it forward. The spear disappeared into the shadows, finding its mark. The creature hiss and shrieked.

"Fool!" The monster roared.

From the treeline, it shot out towards me, quick as lightning. I dove, but it caught my legs and I flew, ten, twenty, thirty feet, slamming against a trunk. I gasped as I hit and groaned. The red eyes rose higher and higher, as a dark silhouette began to form, swaying back and fourth. My head spun, and a haze fell over my eyes.

The creature snickered. "I'll make a meal out of you, boy!" And it lunged forward.

I gasped.

From my right, a blur came from the bush, sliding out in front of me. The red-eyed creature's jaws snapped around the beast. It screamed as the fine, pointed barbs drove into its mouth. The creature hissed. The beast roared. And in the next moment everything was quiet.

My eyes faded in and out as I tried to look upon the beast standing over me. But darkness fell over me ... and the last thing I felt was the pain in my back as I smelt blood in the air.

I fought my eyelids open as the bright morning light found them. In response, I shut them and sat up, blinking until my eyes adjusted. My insides burned, and my back ached. I rubbed the pain, with little luck of easing it.

I peered down on the ground, eyeing a small wooden head. I took it into my hands, twirling it in the light. It had a snout, two round eyes, fangs, and two small, rounded ears. "A bear-hear totem," I whispered.

"You are fortunate I was still around," a deep voice boomed. "That grim spirit wanted to injure you, then before you died, force you to bind your spirit with his."

I whirled around and found the giant beast lying on the bank. His head was a boulderous size, with a thick, brown coat of fur that matched his legs and the top of his feet. But on his back were long, brownish-white barbs that came to a point. Hundred upon hundreds of them. And I knew they were a quill.

I see why they call him a bearpine. I winced, rising to my feet. "Thank you for your help," I said, feeling a sharp pain roll from my shoulder down my spine. I groaned.

"Take it easy. You were thrown thirty feet … and I have not finished healing your spirit."

"Healing my spirit?" I raised an eyebrow and looked down upon the totem in my hand. "Do you mean?"

Panchu turned his snout towards the falls. "You were dying, so I bound our spirits in order to save you."

My tongue was heavy and I was unable to find my voice. I walked over to the beast. Lying down he shadowed me like a mountain. At least eight feet tall, and half as wide as the great oak tree.

“Why did you save me? I thought I was unworthy …”

The beast brought his hazy eyes upon me. In the light, they appeared like two black orbs hidden behind a mist. “I hate grim spirits.“

“I thought it was one,” I replied, rubbing the smooth wooden totem. I felt strength just having it in my hand. “What was it doing out here?”

“Where guardians go, grims and beasts are close to follow.”

I scratched the back of my head. “What does that mean?”

The bear drew in a long breath and blew dust and leaves into a whirl. “Did they not teach you anything, Tribling?” He shook his head, grumbling. “Grim and Beast spirits are like leeches … they bind to the spirits of young unchosen triblings. Offering them power, rewards, vengeance, and shaman's way of life. You denied the grim, therefore he would’ve forced you to bind with him.”

I sat beside the bear and dipped my feet into the pool. “But I would’ve never said yes …”

“Maybe.” Panchu replied hollowly. “But grims and beast are known to keep their victims alive, torturing them until they do give in. And when they do, the torment does not end there. Where guardians gain their power by bonding with their shamans, grims and beasts gain their powers by draining one's spirit. The darker the spirit, the stronger the monster.”

I cupped water into my palm and splashed it on my face, cooling my skin that was hot from the morning heat. Once I shook myself dry, I turned towards the old bearpine. “So you only saved my life because you hated grims?”

“I saved your life because it needed saving.” The bear frowned. “Don’t make me regret it.”

I stood to my feet and brushed the dirt from the back of my robe. Between my index finger and thumb, was the bear-head totem. I raised it for Panchu to see. He sniffed the air and squinted his blind eyes. “We should start heading back to the village. Retreat!”

Panchu’s lips curled downward.

I waved the totem, “I said, retreat!”

The bear let out a low, rumbling guffaw and stood slowly to his feet. “You’ve got a lot to learn, boy.”

I grimaced and looked upon the totem. “I thought spirit pets were supposed to hibernate?”

“Spirit pets?” Panchu growled, shaking his thick coat of quill. “What happened to calling us guardians?”

I shrugged and snapped the totem to the band around my neck. “Don’t know. That’s what all the young Triblings call guardians —”

Panchu lunged forward, snout inches from my nose. He roared, “I am no one’s pet!”

I wiped the saliva from my cheek, “and I am no one's spit rag …" Panchu sighed, his breath foul, reeking of blood and fish. He turned on his paws and headed for the trees. I walked closely behind, keeping on his heels. “So you’re not going to hibernate in the totem?”

“No …”

“Why not?”

“Totem hibernation is not all that it’s made out to be. Besides, I am a much better warrior when I'm not suddenly awoken and called for battle.”

“Is that what happens? You just sleep the whole time?”

Panchu swung his oversized head at me. “It’s called hibernation for a reason. Don’t they teach you triblings anything anymore?”

I shook my head, “not too much … no … not until we’ve become a shaman, and are allowed to go to Spirit Ridge. That’s where everything is taught now.”

“Spirit Ridge?” Panchu grumbled. “I forgot about that wretched place …”

I spun the spear, swiping and jabbing the air. “There, you and I will become one spirit!”

Panchu grumbled, “this was a mistake … “

“Oh, don’t say that, old bear.” I reached to pat his head.

Panchu glared, “don’t touch me.”

I nodded and pulled back my hand as he headed down the trail. I quickened my pace. Three steps for every one of the giant bears. We walked past the bear cub boulder, and the great oak tree, until I couldn’t hold my tongue.

“What happened with Kawah?”

The bear brushed against a tree, toppling it over “It’s best you keep your questions to yourself.”

Power of Panchu’s kind should never be tested, but now that we were bound, I felt I could push things a bit further. “Since you were with a shaman, you must’ve been through many battles.”

“A few …”

“So we should be unstoppable partners.”

“A guardian is only as strong as the spirit he is bound to.” His snout raised and lowered as he looked upon me. “And yours is very weak.”

“For now.” I said. “Wait until I’ve bound more spirits … by the time I’m an elder shaman I’ll have an army.”

“You’ve got a lot to learn, Tribling.” Panchu stepped over a log as I leaped. “The more spirits you carry, the less of your spirit remains."

"I never thought about that ..."

The bear guffawed. "That does not surprise me one bit. You don't think about a lot of things ... like throwing your spear at that grim."

I looked upon the pointed stick in my grasp. "I could've killed it if I struck it in the eye ..."

"Grims and guardians are too strong for mortal weapons ... You must use runes and you must use guardians." The old bear grumbled. "You're lucky you left with your life."

"You're not going to lecture me again, are you?" I massaged my forehead. "I don't think I can take another one of those ..."

"No. You don't listen anyway. And a tribling who doesn't listen is as good as dead."

I shrugged, "if you say so ... What was that thing anyway? I know it was a grim, but what kind?"

"A wendingo. And you're lucky it was looking for a spirit to bound to and not supper."

I recalled one of the lessons I'd heard from the great wise woman. How wendigos were danty, pale flesh creatures, with an everlasting ache of hunger. I shivered at the thought. And was grateful I was breathing the fresh, pine air and not being inside the belly of the beast.

After we crossed a stream we came to the edge of the forest. The great teepee village only a few hundred feet away. I looked upon my home and grinned. Panchu looked upon the place and frowned.

"I've done my best to try to forget this place," his snout wrinkled, "and now I'm back to where I started."

"This will be a different outcome this time, old bear."

"Don't call me that … let's stick with Panchu."

I pointed to the totem on my neck. "You sure you don't want to hibernate?"

"And miss the look on the tribes folks faces?" Panchu lifted his snout and laughed. He growled, "not a chance."

The sound of drums and whistles carried over the village rooftops and found our ears. I swayed back and forth, my legs walking with the rhythm. I followed the noise, Panchu on my left side.

"The Shaman Ceremony is beginning! Let's get there before it starts."

Panchu grumbled, "we'll make a grand entrance …"

We followed the song until a voice rose up above the music. A strong, deep voice that carried beyond the forest. "People of the Tocagree tribe! Today we give you our twenty-four chosen Shaman!" Cheers and chants filled my ears. I halted twenty feet from the crowd and forty feet from the stage where the other shaman stood; their guardians of all shapes and sizes standing next to them.

Panchu whispered, "I'm going to love this …"

I tore the totem from my neckless and lifted it into the air. "Tribes folk of Tocagee village! I, Kai, am the twenty-fifth Shaman worthy of The Great Spirit!"

At once, the crowd turned their heads over their shoulders, as the elder, and the other young shaman looked upon me. Their faces twisted in surprise.

"Kai?" A man with gaged wooden earrings in his ears whispered. "But I thought he was carried off by a grim?"

"No, it's even worse." A white haired woman with three teeth replied. "He has been bound to a former guardian … the one, and the only … Panchu."

All eyes turned to the enormous bearpine. Their eyes widening. Jaws unhinged. All fighting back the screams hung in their throats. Inside my chest, I felt an ache that raised to my head, giving me a thought more horrifying than nearly being eaten by a wendigo.

I've bound to the most hated guardian in all of the lands. I shook my head. And no one in the village would forgive me for it ...