I didn't know what happened after passing out from using my first spell. When I woke up, I found myself in my cottage.

My eyes took awhile before they were fully opened. I felt so drowsy that I wanted to take a nap right after waking up.

'So I really can't become a legendary mage...'

I felt like crying but I held in my tears like a man.

Why is my mana so little?

What did I do to deserve this?

Will I have to become a farmer now? Ploughing the fields every day until I die from old age or have a stroke after taxes suddenly went up?

'I can at least become a knight with my body alone, right?'

Knights are people who use physical strength to fight. If I can't use magic then my only path in life is that or become a politician. Though I don't want to dabble in politics or economics. I usually get lazy if I don't find things interesting even if I'm capable of doing it.

I sat up on the cottage bed and looked around. My entire room was decorated with things that cater to an infant. There were games for babies and pillows on the couch where my mother always breastfeeds me. In my cottage, there's a lot of stuffed animals.

Their designs are straight out of a nightmare but I appreciate my parents' thoughts. It might be that things needed for babies are expensive and they instead had to make it themselves.

"!!!"

Why I was grumbling to myself, a hot sensation spread in the depth of my stomach. It felt like drinking water on an empty stomach.

The 'something' was so great in mass that I thought it was impossible that it came from this small body.

'Could it be?'

I tried meditating and imagined releasing my mana just like mother always does. It was fairly easy for me.

And then I felt it.

'So much!'

I concentrated on peering into myself. Seeing the energy within my body.

'Be the void within my body. Focus on my core...!'

I was standing in a space where an endless stream of something was reaching up to my knees. The colour of it was black and it smelled odourless.

I cupped my hands and looked at it closely. It was a dust that strangely had no mass or a structure. It flowed like water and yet it was like dusts of sand being blown by the wind.

This strange substance... I immediately recognized it even though it's my first time seeing it inside my body.

Mana.

My mana. But why was it black?

And why did it seem so endless?

A gigantic black sphere entered my vision when I turned my gaze up.

'Is that a type of core?'

Another bright light was about the same size and had white mana instead of my black mana.

I approached it and tried to put my hand against it.

'!!!'

I was suddenly thrown back into reality. My whole body was drenched with sweat. If the black sphere was my mana then what was that strange white core?

Instead of the odourless smell I got from the black mana, the white mana flowing out of it smelled like the air after it rained. Like nature.

The quantity was far more than my black mana. Should I try and read some books again?

Maybe some of the books lying around the house can help me figure out what that mana was. I should try meditating in order to understand it a little more.

◇◇◇

When I returned to reality, a large mass of power surged within my body. I couldn't seem to control the flow of a majority of the mass of mana. It's so much that I could literally dive into my mana pool if it were a lake.

Mother's singing voice still came from the kitchen while she was cooking.

I stealthily tried using [Psychokinesis]. This was a spell many great mages could use upon being able to use magic. I already read the description in the magic book.

Surely I could do it too, right?

"..."

I aimed my hands at the stuffed bear that was in my cottage and tried moving it.

A failure.

I tried again.

Yet another failure.

The consumption of my mana was large but I barely felt exhausted at all. I only managed to move the bear a little bit towards my feet.

I sighed and sniffed a putrid odour.

I was unable to vomit on my own from the smell.

It was coming from my diaper.

It was so irritating that I naturally had to cry in frustration. My limbs were barely developed so I couldn't take it off completely. The most I can do was lift my legs up so it doesn't smear my entire behind.

The door then opened, revealing my mother.

If you come across this story on Amazon, it's taken without permission from the author. Report it.

She smiled gently and approached me.

"Looks like someone made a mess~"

"..."

I averted my eyes and cursed inwardly.

'Damn this stupid baby body.'

Eleanor moved me to the couch and quickly went to go fetch another diaper from the cabinet. Even while sniffing the rancid odour from my excretion, her smile never once broke from her face.

She also never lost that warm glint in her eyes. Did my mother from earth also treat me this way when I was born?

I wouldn't know. The treatment I received from them was anything but special throughout my childhood. There were few happy moments. Like when I graduated high school and was able to pursue a degree in math.

I knew they weren't actually happy for me. They would look good in front of other people as they brag over things like:

–Look at my son's grades. Isn't he amazing?

–He is always on the dean's list for having the best behaviour and highest grades.

Things like that. It was like showing a new species to curious human scientists. I felt like my efforts I went through were only for them to brag about.

I used to watch a lot of motivational videos and learned how to study effectively. If it wasn't for that then I wouldn't have succeeded in life.

My parents weren't part of my self-improvement. Not at all.

If I feel that my parents from this world are the same as my previous parents... then I'm leaving this house once I become of age. I might not have a destination in mind. The only thing that would matter is leaving a house with no love.

It's only an 'If'. Now that I know I have the capabilities of a mage, my life will get easier as I grow up.

Maybe I'll life a slow life like those overpowered cliché reincarnation novel mc's. Or I'll become an adventurer and find party members to bond with, find a beautiful swordswoman to make her my wife, have lots of kids and grow old together.

Mother finished putting on my diaper and picked me up.

She held me to her chest and hummed as she danced slowly.

I might be overthinking about family too much...

'So sleepy...'

I yawned as I heard mother's gentle voice.

◇◇◇

Throughout the next couple of months, I practiced my magic spells in secret. My father is rarely home so I don't have to worry about him finding his baby play with dangerous spells. My mother is always sleeping most of the day since she's up all night attending to me even though I don't need it.

I'm a strange baby. Normal babies would cry during the night. They're selfish creatures that want attention day in and day out. I'm glad I'm not like other babies otherwise my mother would have to stay up all night to attend to me.

She already has to work in the fields to look after our crops which they always sell to pay taxes or for extra income. Her other job involves enchanting items for amateur mages or for adventurers.

I usually sit and watch her through the window from our house. What else can I do? I couldn't even walk without stumbling down. The best I could do was crawl on my knees.

Anyways, I sat on top of the hill against the tree yet again today. Eleanor already fell asleep after noon arrived which means I have time to read through the magic book. I also brought a book of this continent's history.

The title of the book in my hand was:

◇Intermediate Rank Spells and introduction to multicasting.◇

I found this book lying in an old bag of my mother. It seems to have been her old adventurer bag since a tattered old mage robe was also inside of it.

I plopped down on the soft grass and read the lines I stopped at last.

–GRAPONIA Royal Academy.

It was the first ever academy to exist on the continent. The Sage and her lover Alucard, the Sword King wanted their teachings to pass on to the next generation. Peace was already upon us when they slayed the Demon Battle God Rodion 950 years ago.

Using the treasures they received from the great archdemon's castles, they bought a single plot of land.

That land was the kingdom we know of today.

An ambitious low ranking knight came up with this idea to start their own city where the academy can be built in. He was a companion of the heroes and also the one who proposed to the Saintess, Merlin.

That city is now the entire kingdom of Colchis today and the low ranking knight was the first king.

The great sage , Odette fertilized the lands to create farms. The sword king, Alucard gathered nomads that would want to live and work in their future kingdom. He trained them and passed down all his knowledge to the future generations.

This would continue for millennia until the academy finally becomes what it is today.

The name Graponia is the God Rank Spell the Saintess and Great Sage casted together to slay Rodion.

Many of the world's spells that are recorded today in records are from the Great Sage herself. Many alterations were made to divide spells in categories. Namely, Low, intermediate, High and Upper High ranking spells.

God Rank Magic has never been casted by anyone other than the Saintess and great sage.

-

If I were to train diligently, would I be able to achieve something as amazing as god rank magic? God rank magic can literally alter the reality of the world and defy physics. Scientists would lose their minds if they saw even one of the god rank spells in action.

Ragnarok. Its origin is unknown.

This was the strongest spell in existence and was used by the Great Sage when she destroyed ten nations that killed many in order to get the Saintess. It was written in books that the reason for her outrage was because her sister killed herself to stop the nations from fighting each other. The Saintess' power to use god rank healing magic was a valuable asset to many in those dire times.

She is able to heal fatal wounds and cure any and all diseases. Her abilities has limits if she can't determine the main injury or she doesn't know the disease. In order to heal, she must pray to the gods and receive their divine power. There are many minor gods in this world as I've read in the history book. Many churches are also spread across the culture of different religions.

The god with the most followers in this world is the Light Goddess, Sol.

After the Great Sage destroyed so many nations using a god rank spell, she disappeared never to be seen again.

They say that the spell caused her to lose all her infinite mana as punishment by the gods for the genocides she caused.

-

I flipped the page again and read as if to absorb everything. I didn't like reading history back on earth but I strangely liked reading about this world's history. It might just be because this is a world of magic and many other phenomena. I used to read novels that involve magic and fantasy elements so it's a fresh feeling experiencing all this myself.

I have yet to slay a dragon though. Dragons are too powerful in this world so I might have to scratch that off my do-to-list of meeting one.

–THE GOD OF LIFE, THE BEGINNING AND OF SPIRITS, THE SPIRIT KING.

"Spirit King?"

When I flipped the page after reading the previous page, a name caught my attention.

'Spirit King... The hero who was worshipped by the elves.'

While I was mulling over the name, a shout came from the house.

"Clyde, dear. Where are you!?"

'Shit. My mother is already awake?'

I used [Flight] to fly towards the back of the yard and play in the dirt. I'm not very into playing in dirt but I had to act like a stupid baby.

Mother seemed to have heard me throwing rocks at the back as she came to pick me up.

"Come. There's someone I want you to meet."

◇◇◇

When she brought me to the house, I saw father's horse neighing outside.

He's back huh.

We entered the house.

"Ah, there he is."

Father turned around with a big grin. I ignored him and saw a little girl of maybe 7 years of age looking at me as well.

She had red hair and big blue eyes. This would normally be rare in our world since only 1% of the population can have this combination. I bet she'll be a beautiful maiden in the future.

The clothes she was wearing was damaged and tattered. Her skin was also covered in filth.

She averted her eyes awkwardly.

"This is Brielle. I found her in a destroyed village when I was helping Lord Mason clear out a guerrilla group. She was underneath rubble hiding away from them. A small battle occurred there near the borders a few days ago leaving only destruction."

Father patted her head.

"I hope it's not too much to bring her home. She was all alone that I didn't know what to do."

"No, no." Mother put me down and approached her. "It must've been scary, huh. Don't worry. We'll find your parents. Can you tell us what they look like?"

At mother's question, the girl began crying. Her voice carrying sorrow and grief.

"T-They're d-dead..."

Both mother and father gasped.

'She's a war orphan?'

Orphans never get good treatment in any kind of world. Even if it's the middle ages or modern society. They are viewed as insignificant humans. Only few are generous enough to help orphans who lost their homes.

I was on the verge of becoming one since I wanted to leave my house in my previous world. My parents were just too unbearable. They said things that no parent say to their child.

But I held on because I wanted to become independent from them after finishing college.

Mother hugged the girl even though she smelled like garbage.

She clung to mother's clothes as if to not let go of finally finding warmth.