Chapter Three - Hero

"I need your clothes, boots and your motorcycle."

--Some rando tweaker running around nude in Los Angeles, circa 1995

***

Catherine, we have a problem.

"Really?!" My legs continued to pound underneath me as I turned enough to fire into the surging mass of Antithesis filling the corridor behind me. "I hadn't fucking noticed!"

I wasn't referring to your really quite amusing game of Fetch. Really, it's very nice of you to provide a feline for eldritch alien plant dogs to chase, but we do have work to do.

"Fetch?! Fuck off, Myalis!"

Oh, my apologies. I assumed you were playing with them. After all, if you really wanted to kill them, you'd just have to aim your-- Oh, I see the issue, I forgot who I was talking to.

"I said fuck off!"

You're really quite bad at comebacks while running for your life. It almost makes me feel like I'm bullying you. Ah well, in that case, may I suggest trying something with more of an impact?

I bit my tongue - almost literally - to keep from snapping at the alien AI. Damn, but she knew how to push my buttons. I was going to really dedicate some time to coming up with counter-zingers when I got back home. A nice list to keep on hand when I couldn't spare the time to come up with something new.

"Fine, how about a turtle shell?"

That would suffice.

New Purchase: Thermobaric Smart Bomb

Points reduced to...

I didn't actually pay attention to the total. There would be time for accounting later, and besides, that total was about to change a lot very quickly. The moment the blue, football sized explosive appeared in my hand, looking for all the world like a century old nuke with its tail fins, I ripped the primer tab out with my teeth.

"Exit, Myalis! Now!"

Window coming up on your left.

I didn't waste time questioning it. Trusting my partner wouldn't give me an exit that would kill me, I turned and chucked the grenade toward the xeno horde and jumped sideways into the large window with as much force as I could put behind my prosthetic shoulder.

I briefly got to see the thruster on it ignite and send it into a quick loop as it locked onto the Antithesis bio-signatures, and then I was in open air, shards of glass glinting all around me.

The next instant, the air in the building behind me exploded with enough force to punt a sad little samurai like me into uncontrolled flight.

I do believe your timing is improving. We almost weren't caught in that one.

"Less talk, more parachute!"

That won't be necessary, though you should probably be ready to duck and roll.

The rapidly approaching building caught my attention and reminded me I was still moving a lot more sideways than I was down.

"Fuck!"

I yanked my arms in and made myself as small as possible, my metal arm coming up around my head as I flew through another sheet of glass like a Cat-sized cannonball. Unfortunately, it was my flesh and bone shoulder that hit the parking garage floor first, promptly spinning me ass over teakettle until I slammed into the side of a sedan hard enough to set off its alarm.

Back first and upside down.

I barely heard it over the pain in my everything as my legs slumped down in front of me.

"Ow ..."

To think, cats are supposed to land on their feet ...

"... Fuck off, Myalis ..."

The car alarm shut off behind me, likely her doing.

I've made sure all local cameras missed your wonderfully graceful landing, by the way. The only surviving copy of the footage resides in my own memory banks. Oh, oops, accidentally forwarded it to Longbow.

"Fuck ..."

While your expansive vocabulary continues to impress me at every turn, I'm sure you'd be much more intimidating right side up.

I set about righting myself with another groan and pulled myself up with the aid of the four-door catcher's mitt. "I hate thermobaric weapons ..."

And yet you continue to use them.

I chose to ignore that. "How am I? Anything broken?"

The narrative has been illicitly obtained; should you discover it on Amazon, report the violation.

If there were, I assure you, you would know by now.

"I hurt all over."

That would be your new collection of bruises, abrasions and minor cuts. Nothing serious, even without your medical implant. Walk it off and let your tech do its job. Here, have a juice box.

I wanted to complain about being treated like a child as the nutrijuice appeared in my hand, but I didn't see any notice of points being deducted, so maybe she really was trying to make me feel better. And it worked. My fingers felt fat and numb as I worked the straw, but the cool flow of liquid down my throat went a long way to soothe it after all of the shouting I'd been doing.

"Thanks, Myalis."

I'm here to serve, Cat.

I took the walk to the stairs to regather myself in silence, the only sounds the remnants of falling debris next door and me sucking sweet, hyper-nutritious alien fruit juice through a straw. I was halfway down the first flight before I finally spoke again.

"So, you said there's a problem?"

The Vanguard System has encountered an anomaly in the incursion zone that must be investigated.

"That's the system that creates us samurai, right?"

An oversimplification, but essentially correct. Though to be pedantic, the system only appoints those that already have the desired traits of a Vanguard. It does not create them.

I nodded. I could see why my phrasing could have caused problems if I'd been talking to anyone other than the voice in my head. "And lemme guess, we're the closest?"

Exactly.

I sighed and tossed the empty juice box at a passing trash bin. I missed. "Alright, lay me in a course. What kind of anomaly are we talking about? Something I'm gonna need to blow up?"

A breadcrumb trail of blue dots lit up in my vision with big, green arrows indicating turns.

We aren't certain. Something is fighting Antithesis. Something we thought was a Vanguard candidate.

"Thought? Past tense?"

The system has detected digital devices, but has been unable to connect to them.

I stopped in my tracks at that statement. "... Myalis, the Protectors practically built our modern infrastructure."

Through Samurai sharing blueprints to influence technological development, yes. I am aware.

"... There's literally no personal device on this planet you guys aren't able to get into."

That would seem to be incorrect. Apparently, there is at least one.

I stood there shaking my head at the idea. "That doesn't make any sense."

Yes, Cat, that's why it's called an anomaly. Regardless, at the very least, someone is fighting Antithesis. They haven't died yet. If you wouldn't mind settling into at least a nice jog, I'm sure I'm not the only one who would like to keep it that way.

"Right, message received," I replied and, sparing only a shake to clear my head, I stopped dawdling and got moving.

The skyways were a maze at the best of times, which was more of a theoretical than anything they actually ever saw, but with Myalis plotting the course, we made good time. Our destination was four blocks down and fifteen floors up, and while there was no direct route to it over the skyways, in the middle of an incursion, it was still faster than taking the roads.

Still, I did more than just a nice jog, and by the time we got to the actual building, I only spared enough air to ask if the elevators were working. Myalis opened the nearest one in response, and I chugged into it before letting my body slap against the back wall and let her manage the buttons.

"Damn it," I gasped as the doors shut and the metal box started moving, "I need a car ..."

I would suggest learning how to drive first.

"Maybe a bike," I mused, barely paying the AI any mind. "A hoverbike. Small and quick so I could use it inside or out."

Perhaps with a thermobaric missile system?

"Sure, why the fuck not?"

Myalis was silent for a moment.

... Cat, are you alright?

"Yeah," I panted, finally starting to catch my wind. "Yeah, or I will be by the time we get up there. Just venting. Can I get another juice box?"

Of course.

This time, I got the notification for points being deducted, but that didn't surprise me. I asked for this one. I took a long pull and sighed. "I need more cardio."

Or more upgrades.

"Damn it, Myalis, I swear you won't be happy until I'm just a straight up fucking robot."

I beg your pardon. If I end up with a robot that still can't shoot straight, I won't be happy at all.

I scoffed, but let the unspoken Fuck You slide. Our floor was coming up, so I pushed myself off of the wall and made sure my Trench Maker was loaded.

And then the door opened and a giant, black head thrust itself in.

"What the shit?!" I shouted as I fell backwards onto my bony ass at the sudden intrusion before I even realized what I was looking at.

Fortunately, Myalis was much faster on the uptake, and slammed the doors on the thing's neck, but that didn't keep it from snapping its teeth and scrabbling to try to get to me.

Get your gun, Cat!

Her words snapped me out of my stunned state and I looked down at my empty hands for the weapon I'd been holding, then frantically started searching for it.

Left corner!

My eyes snapped over, I snatched up the boxy weapon, fumbled my grip for a moment, raised it up ...

There was a flash of blue fabric past the elevator doors as something slammed into the Model Three and it seized in pain. Whatever it was physically hauled the massive mound of meat out of the door and hurled it away from our little safety box, and the doors that had been holding it in place slammed shut.

I sat there for longer than was really appropriate for a samurai, still with my gun raised like I was going to shoot something. Then, finally, I blinked.

"What happened to the hydra?" I asked, referring to my shoulder-mounted autoguns.

You're dry. You used it all up running away earlier.

"... Would have been nice to know."

You didn't ask.

"Right. Reloads, quick as possible, then let's try this again."

The next time the elevator doors opened, I had my weapon up and the guns on my shoulder were tracking with me, but this time nothing jumped me. The hallway looked like a warzone had passed through, but neither xeno nor blue-clothed anomaly graced me with its presence.

"Where's our hero?"

Tracking.

The helpful blue dots came back, but I didn't need them for long. I hardly got going the right direction before the sounds of fighting reached my better ears. No shouts, though. That was normal for Antithesis. They didn't growl or snarl or spit or anything. But whatever they were fighting wasn't exactly panicking, either.

I rounded the corner and what I saw stunned me so much that my weapon went limp.

I recognized the shade of blue immediately. It was a crop jacket with a white emblem on the back and shoulder, some sort of planet orbiting a star, and it was being worn by a woman that was duking it out with a Model Four. She didn't look that much older than me, four, maybe five years, and her long brown hair trailed behind her every movement while blue eyes stayed obsessively focused on her opponent.

Under her jacket was some sort of white-framed rig over a black and blue armored bodysuit. Given that she'd hauled several hundred kilos away from us already, I'd have put money on it being some sort of powered strength enhancer.

Oh, fuck, did I mention it did absolutely nothing to hide her curves?

Cat, if you don't get yourself under control, I will personally see you chemically sterilized.

I blinked, suddenly reminded I wasn't alone. Wait. "The fuck you say?"

You are in a combat zone. If you die because your hormones got the best of you, Lucy will be very upset.

Damn, that hit like a bucket of cold water. I blinked again. "I wasn't that bad."

Cat, you are always that bad. We could probably ask anyone you have ever met as proof. Now shoot the angry tentacle monster and stop ogling the anomaly.

I grumbled as I raised my gun again. "Alright, but not because you told me so."

A Mark Four wasn't anything to a couple bursts of incendiary bullets. I didn't think it even really knew I was there.

Turned out, neither did the woman. She started at the impact into the Model Four and jumped back as she wheeled on me, reaching for something on her back.

I raised my weapon above my shoulder and put my hands up quickly. "Whoa, whoa! Easy, lady, I'm on your side!"

She blinked, apparently realized she was, in fact, looking at a fellow human despite the helmet and furry ears, and her shoulders relaxed. A moment later, she stood up straight.

"Sorry," she said. What was that accent, American? Which one? "Are you part of the security response?"

I stared at her for a moment. Maybe my outfit didn't look crazy enough, after all. Or maybe it looked too crazy. "Uh, sort of? I'm Stray Cat, I'm a Samurai."

The moment I said it, I could tell she didn't understand. There was that distant look people got when something went over their heads. "A vigilante, then. That'll have to do. I've got survivors sheltering in place further back."

And as if that was everything she needed to say, she just turned on her heels and headed further into the maze of corporate offices like she expected me to follow. Of course, she was right. Seemed an awkward time to tell her I was there for her, but hey, people in need. That was technically my job, too.

... I hadn't been so roundly disregarded since becoming a samurai.