Chapter 89: Night Lights Cast Shadows
The dreams were normal, containing images from his recent days traveling. Trint transitioned smoothly from walking in the hills to entering a forest. He was alone, walking from a sunny meadow into a tightly woven canopy and steadily darker woods. He turned to look back, and it was now completely dark. He looked around in sudden fear.
His eyes scanned the overhead branches. He thought he saw a pair of eyes and one of those teddy bear terrors from when he first arrived in the Iterations. But the image faded, and nothing came of it.
“I’m seeing things,” he told himself, unaware he was a dreamer.
Walking further, all light faded, and the void surrounded Trint. But having experienced this before, he was calm. Then with a feeling like ice spreading across his arms and instant goosebumps, he knew he was being watched and immediately plunged into childlike fear.
“Who’s there?”
“Ah, finally you come,” Baba Jaga’s pleased reply came from the darkness.
Trint recognized the voice but couldn’t shake the fear. It was palpable.
“Why did you bring me here? What do you want?” He spoke and nearly heard his teeth chatter from his shivering.
“It is you who brought me here, not I,” Baba Jaga stated like a predator toying with its prey. “I know your fear and don’t wish to prey upon it. For now, it is unavoidable until I teach you more. So, push through.”
“Am I dreaming?” Trint looked around into the darkness, scanning for his nightmare.
“This is no longer a dream,” Baba said, stepping fully from the darkness. Still a creature of shadow and ambiguous shape. But now her shadowy shifting outline was clear to Trint’s eyes and perception. There was a definite feminine grace; occasionally, long hair could be seen through the shadows.
“You are now in a place akin to my Soul. It is the place where our Souls meet. You see, my creation and manifestation became real long ago. I have existed within you since you were a small boy. Not until you unlocked your Soul did I have a Soul of my own. Belief is a powerful thing. And faith is capable of creation. Especially here with the System.”
“What? You’re saying I created you when I was a little boy?”
“Yes,” She confirmed with a smile that briefly showed sparkling white teeth in too large of a smile. But the teeth and any defining features quickly disappeared into the shadows. “Even before the System, your beliefs and faith in them created powerful forces in your mind. You should know that without the mind, your Soul is formless. It is with the Mind that our Souls take shape and have meaning. Many more dwell deep in your subconscious. You have experienced or met only a small measure of what your deep mind holds. It is like your own version of the Subsystem. But those creations of your thoughts and subconscious mind influenced your development and often shaped your motivations and choices without your awareness.”
“So, you are like my inner demons?”
“Please,” She scoffed, waving an arm as if shooing a pesky bird. “I am no demon. You are not possessed or anything like that. But your subconscious is filled with ideas that gain greater substance when you opened your Soul. You birthed us into existence, and the System gave some of us more power and intellect based on our past influence over you.” Trint listened carefully, trying to consider the ramifications of the new information. He tried to ponder his belief or experience that created such a powerful subconscious monster.
“I’m not a monster,” she stated as if correcting a stubborn child.
“What, you can read my thoughts now?” The man challenged.
“Only while you are in my domain,” She stated as a matter of fact.
“Great, that puts you at quite the advantage,” he frowned as he crossed his arms. “You sure look like a monster, sound like one and scare anyone who gets a look at you. I mean, look at that brat, you scared.”
“He’ll be fine. Might have learned his lesson after my help. And don’t pout. I am here to help, not harm you. I am more a part of you than your companion Pneuma. I have been with you longer and know you better. But he and I are alike in that I, too, want what is best for you.”
Trint felt the words ring true and felt right. The tension he had been holding visibly released. He nodded, “I will trust you as much as I can for a shadowy boogeyman…woman…you know what I mean.”
“Yes, I do know. And as I said before, I will reveal my nature and lessons when you are ready. This is not the time as you are not truly prepared.”
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“Okay, what can you tell me now?” Trint was growing slightly frustrated and crossed his arms as if guarded.
“Instruction is often best seen rather than explained. So, pay attention to what I show you,”
Trint’s view shifted. He felt like he slid down lower. He was small; his thoughts slowed as if filtered through a strainer.
“This must be how I felt before the System,” he said aloud, but his voice was muted like he was under the water.
The darkness around him peeled back in front of him to show a small child, no more than a year old, in a crib. A little boy, Trint didn’t recognize the room but knew from old pictures he’d seen that this was him.
The room was dark except for a small nightlight plugged into an outlet on the other side. It cast the room in shadow as the yellow bulb softly shined near the floor.
Trint’s view from across the room abruptly shifts to see through his younger self’s eyes. Trint also registered new emotions. They were robust and unfiltered by adult comprehension or thought. But he recognized a desire for comfort and pangs of fear. The nightlight flickered, and the shadows danced. The young eyes shut after seeing an image dance in the shadows. The boy fell from his spot at the rail as the hall light flicked on and could be seen under his bedroom door. The boy blinked his eyes as tears formed. The shadows danced one last time menacingly. A form slipped into the darkness as a woman’s voice proceeded her entry to the room. He heard her but didn’t dare look after the last images terrorized him and drew tears and then cries from the young boy. Trint was a passenger in this memory, but the emotions were clear and deeply felt.
Suddenly he was back in the void of Baba’s Soul.
“So, what, you are a figment of my young memory that turned into a subconscious fear and now became real in the System?” Trint was still feeling the powerful fear of the child and brushed away an unwelcome tear but now more readily understood the reasoning of his current mind.
“That is a logical conclusion of what I have shown you, but no,” She affirmed but corrected as a shadowy appendage extended and rested on Trint’s shoulder. He recoiled a bit. Fear still firmly pushed his heart to beat even in this place.
“Calm yourself. I won’t bite. I showed you a memory you’ve forgotten—one of your early fears. The dark has scared many and strengthened my power in your world and Soul. Faith, both individual and corporate, gives birth to reality. I have memories of being more than your imagination. I don’t know how much to trust them as your mind and belief in the supernatural likely shaped my creation.
I, in part, am an amalgamation of the deepest darkest places your mind could go. And you had quite the imagination. But now, that imagination and your fear have found a place beyond your mind. I and all your deep thoughts have found substance in your Soul. I am but one of many. You needed me, and I came. Koschei and I are two sides of the same coin. Not opposites but complementary.”
“I still don’t know why you showed me this or what you’re trying to explain. How does any of this help me?”
“When you unlocked your Soul, you unleashed a life force that empowered your soul and everything in it. The things that make you, you. The human soul is a powerful thing. I know because yours held and fueled me and now gives me life. I can now exist beyond you. But I am intrinsically tied to you and your goals, drives, and very being. I and all your Soul creations are more than just your minions. More than just your thoughts with substance.”
“There is much more to show you, but you need time to consider,” she reached out a hand. “But first, take this.” She handed him a small stuffed bear, not unlike the ones he killed in the forest. But this one was less a nightmare and instead all nostalgia.
“That my childhood bear?” Trint immediately knew it was and felt comfort just touching it, despite it being handed to him by the nightmare of all his nightmares.
“Yes, it is. I recommend you take this and place it somewhere safe in your Soul. It, too, has power because it was once precious to you and should be protected. You should meditate on your life before the system. You have baggage to sort through, and it will only strengthen you when you get it arranged properly.” Then she tapped him on the forehead with a barely visible bony, crooked finger. The long pointed nail that was chipped and black slightly scratched him, and he reached up to touch his forehead as she withdrew entirely into shadow.
Trint woke but didn’t move. He felt like he was fully awake, but he realized he couldn’t move his body. Then he opened his eyes to see Baba Jaga hovering over his sleeping form.
Then he woke. Fully awake, he sat upright.
Am I awake now? I was dreaming, then woke from one dream to another, and now I’m truly awake?
“Hey, you going to go back to sleep, or are you up for a while?” Pneuma tilted his head in curiosity as he raised one eyebrow, barely seen in his slightly varied shades of the void, “It’s only been an hour since you started snoring.”
“Only an hour?” Trint’s surprise was evident as his shoulders sagged, and he shook his head. “No, I’m awake now. Feel free to do what you want. I’ll keep an eye out,” he replied while walking to the bathroom. From there, he shouted, “You didn’t let those servants in while I slept, did you?”
“No, I hoped you’d get some actual rest. It was funny but maybe childish for someone as old as me. I suppose your immaturity might have rubbed off on me.” Pneuma chuckled with a deep belly laugh, sounding like a mix of a bear chuffing and a human man’s laughter.
The rest of the night, Pneuma slept or mediated lying down. Trint wandered the villa. He went through the garden, did some stretches, practiced some fighting stances, and used several of his Soul Creations to spar. He also found a small bookshelf. It contained text on local history and some general family history. There was even a guidebook for the family, “Coyriel Family Code of Conduct.”
Trint read that and was surprised to learn a lot, even from the general guidelines it provided. The family was known for healing and fighting, a mix he already knew.
The book covered topics for their fighting forces and provided ranks and responsibilities on a general level. There was information on leadership and structure within the family and instructions on how to greet and communicate based on your position in the family and greater organization.
Trint learned a lot, yet there was nothing an outsider shouldn’t know in the book. He assumed it would still prove helpful with their relationship with their hosts.