254 days.

I have 254 days left to find my soulmate because I’ve already wasted the last two weeks asking strangers how the hell I’m supposed to do that.

No one leaves this place without finding a soulmate, and not leaving this place is not an option. Staying here means never being born, and never being born means not existing.

No one wants to not exist.

Or at least, I want to exist.

“We’re in the mess hall, B.” Niel pushes one of the trays across the table, nearly spilling soup all over my drawing, painting the black-and-white sketch as dark as his hair.

I could still salvage this if it was paint.

“Great! You ruined it.”

“It’s a placemat, not a sketchpad!” He grabs a paper towel from the holder between us anyway, trying to keep the liquid from reaching my dream boy’s face.

Niel was blessed. He found his soulmate the day after he arrived. It wasn’t hard for him either – with the girl’s name tattooed on his wrist, it sure was convenient she’s a writer – and it was as easy to confirm considering she used to be deaf before he spoke to her.

“Don’t worry too much,” Jo reassures me as she sets down glasses of juice on the table for the three of us. “Maybe he hasn’t arrived yet.”

“Or maybe I arrived late, and he already gave up searching.”

“Bea.” Jo takes her seat beside Niel and reaches out to hold my hand.

“His birthday could be tomorrow!”

Niel shakes his head and gives me an eye roll.

“No, what if it is? How does that even work? Wouldn’t it be unfair if I’m still here, and he’s gone? I don’t want to fade into nothingness!”

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“Careful,” Niel warns, calling out my gestures again. “You’ll hurt someone with that pencil.”

I put it back into my jacket pocket, fitting it snugly into the roll of my favorite portrait. Too bad I never saw that guy again. He’s probably taken already, and maybe even born now.

Then again, the chances of meeting someone more than once in a sea of a hundred million people and counting is fatter than blue whales, so maybe he’s still out there.

“That’s never happened before. Don’t worry.”

“ Oh, she’s hit someone earlier, Jo.”

Jo rolls her hazel eyes at Niel. “I meant ‘fading into nothingness.’ Believe it or not, some found theirs on their last day. There’s a lot of journals about it in the library.”

“Not helpful.” I shove the slice of bread into my mouth lest I say anything more to my good neighbors.

“Do you have plans after dinner?” Jo asks.

“Stupid question.”

“I told you, Jo. She’ll be resto hopping, then go home by 22 o’clock.” As one of the lucky ones, my friend here has the freedom to spend hours at home doing nothing or talking about anything and everything with his soulmate, and the luxury to mind a new neighbor’s daily routine. Now, he knows I leave before the sun rises the same way I know he sings Jo to sleep soon after the sun sets.

“I’m thinking of making that 23 for a change,” I tell them.

Jo informs me, “I’m thinking of bringing you to the theatre for a change.”

I shake my head.

“B, you can’t live here.”

“I’m not, Niel! My stuff is still in the unit next to yours. And –”

“Everyone eats.” They both say the same time I do.

“But a clock a millisecond off would always be wrong,” Jo tells me, then takes a sip of her orange juice.

“Are you sure I’m a millisecond off, poet?”

“No, but you could be in the wrong place talking to the wrong person all the time. He might be doing the same thing.”

“I’ll switch up the restaurants then.”

“Don’t you get sick of watching people on a date every day?” That earns Niel a nudge from Jo.

I scoff. “Like you’re not asking me to be a third wheel on your date, Jo.”

“It’s not a date! We’ll just hang out, and you can meet new people –”

“— who are all bound to head over to one diner or another.”

“You can choose which one of us you’d rather go with if it makes you more comfortable.” Jo offers. “I just hate seeing you throw yourself at random guys every single day. You haven’t even seen the world.”

“Oh, Ramon gave me a tour just fine.”

It was not fine. We went circles around the colossal, iridescent temple, then we had to run inside when we weren’t supposed to because of that stupid hurricane. I hated it. Still do.

“Just this once, B.” Niel backs his girl. “Then you can live out on the streets for all we care.”

It’s a lie. I can see it on Jo’s face. She just can't not care about anyone. She even worries about animals not having soulmates.

“Fine.” I finish the last of my soup straight from the bowl so I don’t see their annoying grins of victory. “Just this once.”