Prologue
Zeus
Ruler of Olympus, Father of Gods,
Lvl ???
“You little shits have any idea what you’ve done?!?!”
Zeus, the Ruler of Olympus, roared at the cowering figures before him. His face was slowly acquiring the shade of a tomato.
“Father! We were just playing catch and—“
“YOU STOLE MY LIGHTNING BOLT TO PLAY CATCH?”
Zeus’s face now bore an uncanny resemblance to that of a beet.
“But the comets we used kept melting! We thought Father’s lightning would be much more fun. It wasn’t my fault that stone hands over there dropped it!”
The “stone hands” in question was more than twice the size of the current defendant, yet his pebbled face took on a contorted expression to this injustice and quivered silently in anger. His entire gravelly body made grinding sounds akin to that of an avalanche as began protesting.
“But—“
“You little shits just made threw SHIT ALL OVER THE GOD DAMN FAN! In case you don’t understand the mortal world Earth is the SHIT and the fan is going to be all the MONSTERS you released by opening a DIMENSIONAL RIFT TO HELL’S PRISON! WITH MY LIGHTNINGBOLT!”
At this, the cowering figures shrunk further into themselves.
“You shits are grounded to the Pit of Tartarus for a thousand years, I’m sending Uncle Hades a message right now.”
“Wah?!”
“No!”
“But he’s so—“
“ENOUGH! GET OUT OF MY SIGHT BEFORE I DOUBLE IT!”
The terrified figures scrambled away. Zeus sighed to himself as he motioned for the tall woman standing beside him.
“What’s the damage Athena?”
“Sire, several Hell Gates have appeared across the mortal universe, most have opened on uninhabited planets, but several planets containing intelligent life have also been compromised. Earth in particular seemed to have been extremely lucky with 7 Hell Gates scattered across the world.”
Athena spoke in a soft mellifluous voice; the contents of her report a stark contrast to her gentle tone.
“Have you thought of any solutions?”
Zeus’s ageless face wrinkled with consternation. The repercussions issued from the Supreme Pantheon would not be light if an entire mortal world was wiped out. Unfortunately, Earth was a planet of greedy apes that had no possibility of fending off the demonic invasion.
“Other than descending ourselves to save them—“
“Unacceptable, avoiding punishment would be the least of our worries if we were to Descend, and the Treaty of Gods is not so easily broken in the first place.”
“The most we can due to aid in the humans’ survival without violating the Treaty would be to incorporate them into the Immortal System…”
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Zeus pondered this solution. While having the shitty apes running around with the potential of gods would be troubling, it would enable him to neatly avoid legal punishment from the Supreme Pantheon. Even if that God was supposed to have the rights to Earth, Zeus still had some favors he pull. Worst case he would simply gift him Andromeda as an apology.
“Very well then, integrate Earth into the Immortal System, as well as any other inhabited planets that are susceptible to extinction. Hmm, also give the filthy humans some basic knowledge, they’re probably too stupid to survive with just the System.”
“Yes Sire.”
At this, in a spectrum never before observed by mortals, a pulsing wave emanated from the poles of Earth. This wave encompassed Earths entirety in less than a second and sank into its very core. The Earth, and every native being upon it, shuddered as the wave passed; beings without intelligent thought were imprinted with a new set of instincts, and humans were wracked by a wave of pain from their head as knowledge flooded into their brains.
A few moments ago, Mortal Realm, Earth
There were 300 students seated in the large lecture hall; the chalkboard was covered in symbols and equations. Calculus 0100 was never an interesting class, but its status as a prerequisite filled the lecture hall with students. At this time well over half the class was slumped into their seats, only the front three rows of students had any semblance of alertness. Amongst these, one student with vague Hispanic features could be seen valiantly resisting the beckons of slumber. His name was Asher Rodriguez, and calculus was his most hated nemesis. Asher had never been bad at math, but when letters beyond x, y, and z had been added, he was lost. However, Asher was never one to give up so easily, he had managed to get into college with a full scholarship and intended to do his utmost to graduate as valedictorian, something he had fervently promised his grandfather before leaving home. Alas, promises and willpower can only last so long in the face of Calculus, and before long, Asher began drifting off…
WHOOMP
Dust fell from the vibrating ceiling panels as the entire class jerked awake. The unfortunate professor was thrown off his feet and fell unconscious as his head collided with the floor.
SKREEEEEEEEEE
Nails, or rather steel beams, on chalkboard sounds screeched across everyone’s ears, raising hairs and exploding eardrums. A shimmer appeared in the air above the lectern and with a ripping sound something crossed over.