I woke up in the middle of the night, feeling lost. The lingering touch of the bleak sun and burning sand was still raw on my fingertips, yet a flake of snow landed on my cheek and dragged me back to reality. I looked around.

It was forever the drifting white and howling wind, and then the fire jumping on our fingertips. Beyond this landscape of whiteness was another landscape of whiteness, and sometimes, the touch, the smell, and even the burns from the heat felt realler in dreams.

I held myself a little tighter and curled up to a ball. I silently prayed to Isle to take me back to the world where the sun tasted salty and the heat of the sand burned my fingertips, but I ended up in a dream filled with stars.

When I woke up in the morning, Vielle was already gone. I’d figure that he went into the valley to pick berries from the trees.

Mother was talking to Lama, the wisdom keeper of our tribe. Their faces looked serious and cheerful at the same time. I saw Lama reaching to my mother’s hand and blessing her with good luck, so I took a guess that they were talking about Vielle’s seventh birthday. It was only three days from now.

In our tribe, the seventh birthday of a child drew the line between death and growth. It was the day when a gift was given, and a child would become a sorcerer, and therefore, a celebration was in place.

On that day, we’d follow the child into the Cave between Mount Dawn and Dusk, the fourth and fifth mountains, and Lama would be waiting for him in a red gown. She’d paint the child’s forehead with fire rocks and cut his fingertips with a short knife. A drop of blood would fall into the Phoenix Stone, and the stone bird that has been living since the beginning of time would gift the child special magic that no one else in the tribe had. From that day on, the child would be expected to grow into adult form in five years and live a long, full life.

However, for those who haven’t crossed the line, death was only a puff away, and therefore, it was also a day to remember all the children we lost to disease and death. We’d say their names in our hearts, and the flames on our fingertips would turn into the faint color of white, then we’d know that they have heard us calling.

The Cave was a place that connected us together, alive and spiritual, sorcerers and children. It formed a special bond between the Phoenix, the Cave, and us. We felt its presence in our bones, and it was somehow hard to describe.

Mother lost seven children before Vielle, and four after I was born. We have witnessed death, in the most subtle yet brutal way.

I remembered the day when Mia was gone. It was only three months ago. We were talking about catching the wind fairies before we closed our eyes, and the next day when I opened my eyes, she has already become a small puddle of water on the ground.

There was no sound, no goodbyes. They just vanished, and you could never see their faces again.

But it wasn’t the worst. Willy, the butterfly girl with long hair who danced in the wind got sick shortly after. She was becoming weaker and weaker, while her body became pale and dark. Willy didn’t last for more than three days, and towards the end, it was frightening to watch her turning black.

It was just as sad as it sounded. Our tribe had a tough year with only one other child turned seven. That night, three other children died in the Cave after the fire went off.

I attempted to connect with the friends who vanished in vain, standing in a field of flowers, calling their names over and over again, but the flame on my fingertips remained the same. I really wished my gift would be to talk to the dead if I lived that long.

In a way, Vielle’s seventh birthday was even more special to all of us.

I knew for the fact that he was secretly happy and at the same time terrified of turning into goo despite how far he has gone, but on the surface, Vielle wandered around in the valley alone from dawn to dusk and acted as if he didn’t care.

He really wanted to see the shadows in the storm before the sun went down again, and he might never get the chance.

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I knew Vielle more than anyone else in the world, and therefore, when he came back with a bag full of berries enough to feed the entire tribe, I asked him if I could come together on his trip to the edge of Isle.

Vielle looked surprised for a moment, but then he nodded.

“I thought you were scared,” he said, popping another berry into his mouth.

“I still am, but I want to see too. Plus, I might die tomorrow.”

“Don’t say that. You’re only two years away from seven.”

“Well…Mia died at six.”

“Alright, I’ll let you come, but you have to promise me that you will not scream into my ears.”

“I promise.”

We quickly stuffed a couple of berries down the throat, patted our hands, and headed out towards the southern end.

“Wanna race?” Vielle challenged me.

“Sure,” I was certain that I’d win.

We ran all the way across the empty field and stopped for a snowball fight midway, and then we didn’t stop until the wind was too strong to cross. The wind fairies attempted to stop us, but we didn’t listen. We just kept running towards the edge of Isle while the wind became stronger and stronger.

At first, it was just blades that cut our skin, and then it became an annoyingly strong force that kept pushing us back, but we didn’t stop. We exchanged a look with each other and decided to push it through until we couldn’t step any further.

The shadows were merely visible. It somehow seemed even further away from us, but the disturbance of wind had an interesting effect that made the shadows seem like they were moving in slow motion.

I was definitely scared, but the wind was too strong that I couldn’t even feel it anymore.

I shouted out to Vielle in the crazy wind. We were moving one small step at a time, trying really hard to stay heavy so we wouldn’t be blown away.

“Do you think we’re in the storm?”

“I couldn’t hear you!!”

“What did you say?”

“I couldn’t hear you!”

I couldn’t hear a word he said, only the broken voice carried by the wind.

I looked back.

The land of Isle was blocked by the wind. There was nothing else but wind and chaos. I started to panic, but Vielle, a few steps further away from me was still making the effort to move further.

For a moment, I thought I saw something approaching, but it disappeared in the wind.

Then the image of the shadow of white appeared in my head again. I saw something coming towards me, and that was the last thing I remembered.

I woke up in the familiar landscape. Vielle was right next to me. He was playing flames on his fingertips, humming mother’s lullaby with a strand of grass in his mouth.

“What happened?”

“You passed out.”

“How did we get back?”

“Shhhh..mother’s coming. Act normal,” Vielle lowered his voice and smiled at me as he saw mother coming towards us.

“Hey you,” mother sat by my bed, “how are you feeling?”

Her voice sounded warm and worried.

“A little dizzy, but I think I’m ok.”

“Vielle said you fell down on a rock and hit your head.”

I didn’t say anything because I was never a good liar, and truth to be told, unlike Vielle, I didn’t enjoy lying to our mother.

“That must have hurt really bad,” she attempted to take a closer look at my head, but I avoided her hand.

“It didn’t feel a thing.”

My eyes found Vielle again, and he was nodding at me.

After I convinced mother I was ok, Vielle and I were alone again.

“What exactly happened back there? We were in the storm, right?”

“Yes we were!” Vielle sounded excited again. His eyes were glistening, “it was really cool! I almost got closer enough to see a shadow, but then when I turned around, you were gone, so I went back to look for you and found you lying there outside the Graveyard. It was still really cool though. I’m really glad we went through with it,” he gave me a pat on the shoulder.

“Did you see anything else in the storm? Like something was moving?” I tried to remember, but for some reason, I felt as if I lost a part of my memory.

“Not a thing. Just the shadows.”

“Ok…”

I rubbed my head and lied down again.

“What does the shadow look like?”

“They were really tall, and they looked like shadows.”

“Did you get to see the face?”

“No…”

“What were they doing?”

That was an odd question. Vielle looked confused for a moment, but then he shrugged, “they were just standing there.”

“Did you see anything at all?”

“I think I saw something, but I couldn’t remember. There was something in the storm though and it knocked me out.”

“That must have hurt.”

“Yeah, probably…”

We drifted into silence.

That night, I had a dream. I dreamt of the shadows were in fact not dead but trapped in the storm. They were telling me something, but I couldn’t hear it in the wind.