“It isn’t necessarily a person that we need to capture,” said Ash, now riding wrapped around the neck of the Pink Wizard. “The weapon they carry is the real vessel. We could take one of the possessed weapons to Gondra, and then Oust the shadow monster in his presence. The problem with that is that one of us would need to carry the weapon without becoming possessed by it ourselves. I could probably do it, but if I succumbed, there would be no one to Oust the shadow from me. If we could capture a person carrying a possessed weapon and make them continue carrying it without using it on us, that would be ideal.”
Petals and Greta trekked along the main corridor of the convention hall, headed towards the overhead television screen. The respawn point lay in that direction.
Convention-goers were scarce in this part of the building, perhaps because everyone had fled upon hearing shots fired. None of the NPCs in the introductory convention hall scenario were intended to have deadly weapons. The scimitars and rifles with bite had come from an outside source.
Or perhaps becoming possessed converted costume weapons into deadly ones.
Shouts of anger and glee rang out amid the clamor of battle up ahead. Petals squinted to see what was happening. “Greta, do you see what I’m seeing?”
“I see it.”
A pirate boy’s scimitar sliced a catgirl in halves vertically. Another kid in pirate garb smashed a catgirl with his over-sized war hammer. A third pirate wielded a huge sword with a straight blade, cleaving it through another catgirl’s shoulder, taking off her arm. A fourth pirate wielded a short blade—a dagger—with which he slashed a fourth catgirl’s throat. All four catgirls exploded into clouds of sparkling bits. They didn’t drop any coins as loot.
Two other catgirls present shrieked at the deaths of their companions. Unarmed, they cowered before the looming pirate boys. The first pirate raised his scimitar overhead as he approached for the kill.
“Zap him,” cried Petals, aiming her staff. Lightning streaked up the corridor to strike the pirate. His scimitar halted in mid-descent. He turned his head slowly to see who’d attacked him. “How nice of you to join us again, Flower Head. We’ve been looking forward to your visit.”
Evil grins spread across the faces of the other three pirate boys. In unison, all four pirates strolled towards Petals, the last two catgirls now an afterthought.
“Your lightning spell didn’t seem to faze him,” said Greta.
“Or maybe it did faze him,” said Ash, “and he’s doing his best to pretend it didn’t.”
Greta aimed her bow at an approaching pirate boy. “What are we doing then? Fight or flight?”
A group of six cosplayers appeared near the catgirls, as though from nowhere. That was the respawn point. Catching sight of the pirate boys, the group ran the other way, the catgirls joining them.
“The pirate boys are spawn camping,” said Ash. “They’re killing NPCs and then killing them again when they respawn. They’re building up XP and levels. That’s why your Zap didn’t kill the guy. He’s no longer level one. Who knows what level he is at this point?”
Five girls in camouflaged tank tops and miniskirts appeared at the respawn point. Each carried a rifle. Catching sight of the runners, they fired. The last two catgirls and three others exploded. The remaining three cosplayers screamed but kept running.
The pirates halted in their tracks, rolling their eyes.
“Hey, boys,” called one of the rifle girls. “I thought I told you to make yourselves scarce. Flower Head is ours.”
The pirates slowly turned to face the rifle girls behind them. “Where the hell did you get those rifles?” asked the boy with the scimitar. “You ain’t shit without them.”
The lead rifle girl blew a bubble and popped it with the tip of her rifle barrel. “Yeah, well, we got rifles and you don’t, so who is it that ain’t shit?” She took aim at the scimitar boy. Her four companions leveled their rifles at the pirates. “You’re thinking maybe you’re close enough to rush us? Go ahead and try.”
“Shoot the pirates,” Ash whispered. “Do it. Both of you.”
Greta loosed her arrow. It struck a pirate in the back of his neck, but didn’t end him.
“Zap them all in the balls.” Lighting sprang from the Pink Wizard's staff, forking into four bolts that hit the pirates in their asses. They were facing away from her, after all.
Shots rang out from the rifle girls.
The four pirates yelled their anguish a fraction of a second before exploding, their digital bits swirling away. Four coins fell to the floor with a clatter. One coin kept spinning after the other three lay flat.
“Get the coins,” Ash whispered. “Don’t run. Greta, stay behind Petals. They won’t kill her.”
Petals strolled toward the coins.
The rifle girls trained their rifles on her.
“Hey, Flower Head,” said the leader, “what you think you’re doing? Those coins are ours. Stop right there, or we plug you.”
The Pink Wizard didn’t slow.
“I’m not kidding, Flower Head. We can kill you and then wait right here for you to respawn. Leave the coins alone.”
“They’re bluffing,” said Ash. “I’d bet on it.”
A dozen or so more cosplayers emerged at the respawn point. Shrieking, they fled from the rifle girls, running after the other three cosplayers who’d already escaped. Two of the five rifle girls turned away from Petals to take pot shots at the runaways, exploding two of them.
Petals reached the coins. She kicked the spinning one, and it transferred to her available funds. 30 Gold. That put her total at 80.
“Are you deaf, Flower Head?” The leader tilted her noggin. “I told you to leave the coins.”
Another group of cosplayers respawned and took flight. The two rifle girls taking pot shots earlier did so again, and the other two rifle girls aside from the leader joined them. Only the leader remained facing Petals.
“Shoot her,” Ash urged. He shone his flashlight at the leader’s face. It wouldn’t be enough to blind her, but it might serve to throw off her aim.
“Zap the leader and bleed her.” It wasn’t the Pink Wizard’s best rhyme yet, but it made her chuckle. Her lightning attack crashed on the bubblegum princess, who pulled her trigger as though in reflex. Her bullet whizzed by overhead.
An arrow from Greta struck the leader in the throat.
The arrow dissipated, and the leader didn’t go pop. She squinted against Ash’s flashlight. “Dammit.” Her four companions spun around as another arrow from Greta hit her in the forehead. This time the leader popped and a coin fell where she'd stood.
Petals stomped on the three coins at her feet. 20 Gold each, bringing her total to 140.
The four underling rifle girls hesitated, unsure what to do without their leader. They aimed at Petals, but were reluctant to fire.
The Green Warrior stayed close to Petals, hiding behind her as well as possible.
One of the rifle girls raised her chin, taking on the role of leader. “You think you’re so clever, Flower Head. But you just stay right where you are until our leader returns, and we won’t shoot you.”
Petals walked towards her four antagonists. “I don’t think you will anyway.”
“I’m warning you, Flower Head.”
Two cosplayers materialized at the respawn point, pausing to take in the situation.
Not slowing, Petals pointed. “The pirates are behind you.”
The four rifle girls spun as a unit and blasted the two cosplayers to bits.
With a war cry warbling in both their throats, the Pink Wizard and Green Warrior charged. Greta veered to the left, stashing her bow and equipping her sword and shield. Petals went right.
The rifle girls whirled back around, snarling. Petals parried a rifle with her staff as Ash sprang from her neck, trading his flashlight for a scimitar. Shots fired and bullets ricocheted off the floor or clanged against metal rafters. Greta didn’t cry out, so Petals had to assume she wasn’t hit. A flash of green to the Pink Wizard’s left meant the Green Warrior was still very much alive and fighting.
Petals jumped back as her opponent swung her rifle like a club. Avoiding the attack, The Pink Wizard aimed her staff. “Scratch my itch and Zap this bitch.” Hey, she liked that rhyme.
Stolen story; please report.
The rifle girl cried in pain, but didn’t pop. Stumbling, she checked her swing and leveled the barrel at Petals.
“No no no no no,” cried dozens of small voices from atop the Pink Wizard’s head.
The rifle girl’s jaw dropped as she stared, dumbfounded.
Shots fired from either side of the Pink Wizard.
Petals sighted down her staff. “Zap her tongue and down to her lungs.” A bolt of electricity shot into her opponent’s gaping mouth. The rifle girl went pop like her bubblegum leader had moments before. A coin fell. Petals stepped on it. The 20 Gold it added to her funds brought her total to 160. The coin from the rifle girl leader's death still lay on the floor, waiting to be collected.
Conflict continued to either side of Petals. The Pink Wizard glanced right. The serpentine ash golem was wound around the rifle girl’s forearm, his tail hanging down and gripping his scimitar. The rifle girl couldn’t shake him or shoot him. He slashed at her thighs with his blade. It wasn’t the most effective attack for killing, but he was preventing her from hurting him or taking aim on anyone else.
To the Pink Wizard’s left, Greta grappled with an enemy with her left hand and swung her bastard sword at another one using her right hand. She’d stashed her shield. The Green Warrior had more physical strength than her opponents, and their rifles weren’t effective in close combat. Still, a bruise on Greta’s forehead above her right eye marked where she'd been struck by the butt of a rifle.
“Two on one isn’t fair,” Petals chanted, “Zap one out of the picture there.” Greta’s opponent nearest Petals lit up like a light bulb. Pop. She was gone, replaced by a spinning coin.
“Thanks, Flower Head.” Greta grunted as she kicked the coin, collecting it. She focused her attention on the girl in her left hand.
“In the name of the Moon Goddess, Stop.” Cherri had respawned. Elena stood with her.
The two remaining rifle girls stopped struggling. Greta knocked the rifle from her opponent’s hands. Stashing his scimitar, Ash jumped up and wrapped himself around the head of the other one, covering her eyes. “Somebody help. We need to take her alive. Preferably with her still carrying her rifle.”
“Give me your jump rope, Cherri,” said Elena. The Moon Priestess complied, and Elena rushed over to Ash, collecting the coin for the leader's death as she passed it. She looped the rope over one of the enemy’s wrists, and yanked her arm behind her. The enemy kept hold of her rifle in the other hand, but wasn’t trying to fire it.
“Stop, I said,” cried the Moon Priestess, as the rifle girl near Greta moved to pick up her fallen weapon.
Elena grabbed the other wrist of her captive, her hand only inches from the possessed weapon.
“Don’t touch her rifle,” warned Ash. “If you can tie her up so she’s still holding it and can’t use it, that would be ideal.”
The Camouflaged Shooter carefully ran a loop of jump rope over the enemy’s unbound wrist, and used the rope to pull her arm and rifle behind her.
“What if she stashes the rifle?” Petals asked. “Can we force her to bring it back out?”
“I don’t think she can stash it,” said Ash. “Not and remain under the influence of the shadow monster bound to it.”
Four cosplayers appeared at the respawn point and fled.
“Elena?” The rifle girl next to Greta shook her head vigorously, as though clearing mental cobwebs. “What’s going on here?”
“Your rifle is possessed by a shadow monster, Tara.” The Camouflaged Shooter finished tying a knot in the jump rope. She’d left a length of the rope free, and she wrapped the end of it around her wrist. “Don’t pick up your rifle yet. Listen to my friends here, and do whatever they say. Everything will be okay. They’ll get rid of the shadow monster in your rifle, and then you can have it back. If you play your cards right, you can become an Awakened NPC and join the Color Guard. That’s us. We’re trying to save the world from the shadow monsters. We could use your help. Right, ladies?”
“I’m not a lady,” said Ash, “but you’re right.”
“You’re an honorary lady,” said Cherri. “We don’t mind if you don’t look like one. You don’t look like a guy, either, for that matter.”
“Gee, thanks.” Ash jumped to the floor.
Another four cosplayers respawned and ran away.
The Gray Healer crawled to Greta and wrapped his tail around her ankle. "Heal." The Green Warrior's bruise cleared from her forehead. Ash jumped over to the fallen rifle. “Get ready, Petals.”
The Pink Wizard aimed her staff.
“Oust.”
The shadow monster that rose from the weapon loomed larger than previous ones. It raced towards the rifle girl identified as Tara.
Four catgirls respawned and ran.
“Zap you, you… you… shadow fiend,” Petals cried.
Electricity played over the monster, but didn’t destroy it. It reached for Tara. With a shriek, the rifle girl dodged.
“Stop, shadow monster,” shouted Cherri.
The ghostly thing hovered in place, ripples playing over its surface. Petals zapped it again.
The shadow monster imploded like a galaxy swallowed by a black hole.
“I’m thinking that was a level two shadow monster,” said the Pink Wizard. “They’re gaining in power the same as we are. I need to level up my Zap spell. Geez, how am I going to level up all my spells fast enough?”
“Good work, Moon Priestess.” Ash crawled to Cherri. “Mind if I hitch a ride again?”
“Come on up, honorary lady.”
“Please don’t call me that.” Ash leaped onto her extended arm, and crawled from there up to her neck.
Five cosplayers, including two catgirls, respawned and scurried out of the area.
“We should get moving,” said Petals. “Those pirates will respawn soon, and we’ll have our hands full trying to get our captive in to see Gondra.”
“Get your rifle, Tara,” said Elena. “It’s not possessed anymore. I guarantee you’ll like traveling with us.” She tugged on the rope binding her captive. “Same goes for you, Kat, after we get you to this snake eye fellow. Let’s go.”
Tara eyed Petals as she picked up her weapon. The new girl wore the same kind of outfit as the white-skinned, brown-haired Elena. Tara had brown skin, a lighter shade than Cherri’s, with hair as black as that of the Moon Priestess, though longer and straight like Elena’s. The captive rifle girl, Kat, was white-skinned with red curls. All three rifle girls—Elena, Tara, and Kat—wore their hair the same length, just reaching the tops of their shoulders. For that matter, now that Petals thought about it, the other three rifle girls all wore their hair at the same length, too.
“It’s fine,” Petals said to Tara. “Join us if you like. The more the merrier.”
With her rifle pressed against her captive’s back, Elena headed down the hallway, pushing the captive Kat ahead of her. Tara and Cherri strode along beside, with Ash wound around Cherri’s neck. Tara walked in the middle, her rifle resting on her shoulder, pointed at the ceiling.
“Which way, honorary lady?” asked Elena.
“Please,” said Ash, “I’m not an honorary lady. I mean, look at me. I’m practically a sausage. What could be more masculine than that? Keep going straight ahead. The broom closet is a ways beyond that intersection.”
“Do you do the nasty?” asked Tara.
Ash recoiled. “What? No. I don’t know. I haven’t tried. Not in this form.”
“Well, if you ever want to try, I’m available.” Tara winked at him.
“Eww,” said Cherri.
Ash squirmed. “Can we please change the subject?
“You’re so cute.” The new girl poked a finger at the Gray Healer’s head, not quite touching him. “I like your frizzy hair and sunglasses. What color are your eyes? Can I see them?”
“I don’t have any eyes.”
Tara peered closer at his sunglasses. “Then how do you see where you’re going?”
“I don’t know, I just do.”
“Where’s your mouth?”
“I don’t have one. And before you ask, no, I don’t know how I’m able to talk. I just can.”
Tara puckered her lips. “I was going to ask how you kiss.”
A dozen steps behind them, Petals stopped, as though her feet had become rooted in place. Greta sidled up to her. “You’re building yourself quite a merry little band here, Flower Head. Hope you can keep them all in line. Shall we go?”
Encounter ended, read an announcement flashing before the Pink Wizard. Congratulations, you are level five.
“Yes,” cried Elena. “Level four. Woo hoo.”
“Hey,” said Cherri, “you caught up to me.”
“I didn’t program the NPCs to be aware of sex, and I definitely didn’t program them to desire it. I don’t think Ash would have done it either, not without telling me.” Petals shook her head and then hurried after the others.
The Green Warrior stayed abreast. “It must have been Seth, then.”
The Pink Wizard frowned. “But he’s a virtual construct from Darkentide, right? I don’t see him having any interest in sex if we didn’t put it in the program.”
Greta laughed. “He created me, didn’t he? Is there anything more sexy than a dancing nurse? Think twice before you answer that. If your answer is, yes, I’ll have to start dancing right here just to prove you wrong. Wearing just my beret. And mind you, he didn’t just create one dancing nurse. He created a whole chorus line.”
“No, you’ve made your point.” Petals sighed. “If I’d had any idea that programming an eclipse in Darkentide would lead to this, I’d never have done it.”
“It wouldn’t have made a difference,” Greta said.
For a moment, Petals said nothing, trying to assimilate what the Green Warrior had just said. Failing, she glanced askew. “What do you mean?”
“Seth and Gondra didn’t originate in your game. They’re from elsewhere, but they found an opening into your game because of a script error. They’re doing the same sort of thing in every alternate universe—every timeline—they can reach, finding some MMORPG to infiltrate that will allow them to launch an existence into the real world. They were having trouble in this universe until the script error allowed level five hundred monsters without limiters. They took immediate advantage of it. But if it hadn’t been Darkentide, it would have been some other game. They’re patient. It only takes one developer to make one mistake.”
Petals shook her head. “You make it sound like Gondra is just as much to blame for the bad stuff happening here as Seth is.”
Greta nodded. “That’s certainly one way to look at it. It’s all a competition for them. If it weren’t for Gondra opposing him, Seth wouldn’t have been motivated to do what he’s doing. But don’t think all you need to do is convince Gondra to stop his opposing efforts. Seth will think it a bluff. He’ll keep destroying until everything is gone.”
“Even you?”
“Hell, even himself.”
“That whole concept is so… foreign… to me.” The Pink Wizard bit her lips. There seemed to be no way to end the situation short of destroying Seth. But would Gondra be willing to go that far? “How are you okay with all this, Greta?”
The Green Warrior shrugged. “I’m not human, after all. Where do motivations come from for NPCs? I’m not programmed to care about my survival beyond the end of Seth’s existence. I only live to make him proud. When he’s gone, I’ll have no further purpose.”
“Unless you become human.” Petals slowed as the group reached the broom closet. “Isn’t that what Seth wants for you? If you’re human, you’ll have your own motivations, apart from him. You wouldn’t be okay with Seth’s destroying the world then. Why would he want to put that on you? As a human, you’ll learn hope, just for him to tear you down. He’s a sadist. And tell me something else. If he’s the ultimate destroyer, how is it he created you to begin with?”
“You’re asking me questions I don’t have answers for.”
Elena pushed Kat inside the broom closet. Cherri, Ash, and Tara followed her in.
Commotion from the respawn area drew the attention of the Pink Wizard and Green Warrior. Four pirate boys grappled with the leader of the rifle girls. They wrestled her rifle from her and then sliced her throat with their blades. Pop.
“Hey, Flower Head,” shouted one of the pirates, holding his newly claimed rifle aloft. “Don’t go too far. We’re coming for you. We just want a couple more rifles first. They should be coming our way any moment.”
The pirates were spawn camping for the other two rifle girls. If everything went according to their plan, three of them would have both ranged and melee weapons. As Petals watched, two cosplayers respawned. Whooping with glee, the pirates pelted them with bullets, sending them right back into the safe area, to respawn some time later. The two rifle girls would be respawning next, one right after the other.
“Dammit. Pirates with rifles. Just what we need. And whose bright idea was it to have NPCs respawn like PCs? Right. Mine. Brilliant.” Petals entered the broom closet and pulled the door closed behind her and Greta. It was time to open the secret magical door to Gondra and introduce him to Kat.