As the glass scattered across the ground to my right hand side something seized me. I couldn’t even move my eyes which were unfortunately locked on the impressive cleavage of the bitch with green eyes who had just materialised in front of me. It felt as though unimaginable pressure was pressing down all around my body, like I was at the bottom of the ocean.

“If I let you go you’re going to be a good boy, aren’t you Ray?” she asked as she took a sip from a glass of champagne I was fairly sure should be broken in bits across Mortimer’s fancy floorboards. While I was unable to move she somehow perceived that I would indeed be a good boy.

“Excellent.” She smiled like a shark and the pressure holding me vanished. I staggered away before spinning and taking in the rest of the room. Everyone was frozen in place. Andrea was in the process of turning around whereas Jez and Patricia were sporting gormless expressions and had barely moved. Marwan and James had both spun and adopted something of a fighting stance, dropping their centre of mass and spreading their arms slightly before they too were frozen.. “Do help yourself to a drink and go and sit down, Ray. It’s been a while since I got to do this bit but I can wait a few moments longer.”

I walked past the fighter and the influencer on my way to one of the leather chairs. As I passed I snagged the glass from Jez, delicately held in between his finger and thumb, pinkie outstretched. Pansy. I snorted and took a swig as I sat down. Whatever the fuck was going on was way above my paygrade and I had a sinking feeling that the three hundred and fifty grand that had lured me here would not be forthcoming. Should have demanded more.

Everything since the war had been bonus time as far as I was concerned so I felt oddly sanguine about the bizarre turn of events. If I could kill Carol before I went out I’d be happy but I needed a distraction to get a chance against a woman who could freeze me in place with a look. I realised there was no way I’d get a shot at her. I would have to hope one of the people I was beginning to think of as “my fellow victims” would give me a chance to escape.

“I’m afraid we have an interloper in our midst,” said Carol. She waved a hand casually and Andrea dissolved into green mist, her clothing and tray falling to the floor. “The others in the house have been disposed of as well.” Mortimer’s face turned puce at this announcement. On the plus side Jerome was now scratched off my list.

That wasn’t right. Andrea had been committed to her role. The pile of clothes revealed Andrea had been wearing very pink and very lacy undergarments. I narrowed my eyes as I glared at Carol who smiled beautifully in my direction. “I trust we won’t have a problem?” she asked pointedly as the door to the reception hall slammed shut.

I raised my glass in a shaky hand and drained it. I shook my head but whoever or whatever Carol was; she was now comfortably at the top of my “dickheads I’ll kill for free” list. She’d knocked my ex wife into second place with one dissolution of a hard working woman.

“Excellent,” she repeated like she could read my thoughts. “I have been known by many names over the years. Perhaps the most common was Poseidon.” She glanced at Patricia who’s face had turned an interesting shade of pink. “Just try and remain calm Patricia. What do you want to say?” Patricia sagged and bounced off Marwan as she righted herself. The man didn’t move an inch. She took a deep breath and opened her mousy mouth.

“Poseidon was male. According to all the texts.” The last was added hastily as Carol narrowed her weird green eyes at the woman. I didn’t envy Patricia at this moment. If Carol looked at me like that I’d be throwing myself out of the window and disappearing into the distance like Wile E Coyote. What kind of weirdo decided that was the most important thing to ask in this kind of situation?

“Zeus turned himself into a swan in order to rape a mortal. He was always getting up to hijinks like that. Do you really think mortal sexual dimorphism applies to gods?” Carol raised a perfect, arching eyebrow.

“Ah. When you put it like that… I suppose not? I take it you claim to be a god then?” Patricia asked carefully.

“I do not appreciate your scepticism but I can understand it. A historian faced with the reality of powers beyond your understanding… I’d be more worried if you took it all at face value.” Carol flashed a perfect smile that quickly dropped into a deathly serious expression. That was what had disturbed me at our first meeting, I suddenly realised. That pitiless gaze lurking under the charm and beauty. “Humans, I would appreciate it if you would please operate on the assumption that I’m not full of shit. While we’ve largely stepped back from meddling in the lives of you people, eternity can be so tedious without the odd spot of entertainment. So we’ve let you all get on with it and started organising the occasional games to amuse ourselves instead.”

“Games?” I asked.

“Games, Ray. You like the fights, yes? UFC, boxing, martial arts?” I nodded. No point lying about shit like that. “Well this is our equivalent of that kind of thing.”

“How many of you are there?” gasped Patricia. I blinked slowly. The crazy woman was forgetting that Carol had just locked her in place with a thought and was now operating on an “Oh, this is an interesting turn of events, let’s look deeper” mentality. I shook my head and waited for Carol to dissolve the academic as well.

“Oh lots. People like you-” sea green eyes narrowed into a glare, “-are part of the problem. I told Thoth it was a fucking stupid idea to let you all start down the science road but he and Osiris swayed the vote. Pricks.” A tinkling laugh echoed out from Carol that sent chills down my spine.

“Like me?” Patricia asked in a stunned voice.

“Yes, like you. For our sake! Your sort is so boring. Let’s hear from Mr. Thornton shall we? Jezza, any thoughts?” asked Carol. Patricia scurried over to the armchair next to my own and sat down with a thump, leaning forward with her hands clasped together under her chin as she visibly fought to remain calm. She wasn’t doing a very good job.

“Can I go get my camera pack? I can record this on my phone but I really want a high quality feed.” As soon as he could move he pulled out his phone and tried to unlock it. “Shit. What have you done to my phone?” he demanded, which I felt was an extremely foolish choice.

“Whatever she wanted to, you giant fucking wazzock,” I snarled from my comfy leather chair. He turned and glared at me.

“The help stole my drink! Robert, I want it noted that this servant failed to treat me with respect! One star this motherfucker! Find out his name and I’ll run it through the mud! I’ve cancelled bigger men for less!” Jez continued in a whiny voice while still trying to get his phone to work. He looked up briefly and stopped when he realised Mortimer was still frozen. “Bob?”

“It seems you haven’t grasped where the power currently lies, Jeremy,” said Carol sadly. The young man's eyes flicked between Mortimer and the sea green witch.

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“I’m not going to be allowed to stream this, am I?” he asked in a sad voice. “Goddammit! It’s so unfair! I’d get fucking billions of views!” he complained in a whiny tone. I moved him up my kill list on general principle. Hopefully he had some skeletons in his closet that would allow my code to accept him as a viable target. Assuming we both survived whatever the hell this was, of course.

“No you won’t. Perhaps Mr. Gallagher might have something useful to offer to the conversation?” Carol asked in a sweet voice.

The man moved fast for about a third of a second. As soon as Carol unfroze him he blurred towards her for a moment then locked back into place.

“Perhaps not. Colonel?” she asked, glancing over at the soldier. Patricia’s right hand moved and grabbed my left forearm in a tight grip. I glanced down then up into her cross eyed gaze. She offered me an uncertain smile. Whether it was the simple familiarity of human contact or some kind snapping back to reality; I couldn’t tell. I suddenly felt like I had an objective. This woman might be some kind of genius but she was shit out of luck when it came to a situation like this. As far as I could see she was innocent and protecting her would fit comfortably into my admittedly flexible moral universe.

“My government will protest this treatment,” snapped Colonel Amir. I rolled my eyes. Another one who was slow on the uptake.

“No they won’t. Honestly it seems like this was a bad batch. We’ll see how you all react to the Otherside. Mortimer, anything to add?” she didn’t bother to unfreeze him. “I thought not. As charming as getting to know you all has been I have a few disclaimers to cover before we get on with the show.

Firstly you all came here of your own free will. Some of you were harder to convince than others.” Poseidon’s eyes locked on me briefly and Patricia snatched her hand off my arm. “Nonetheless you all volunteered to be present. We gods have made something of a sport out of these things. There are rules we all agreed to thousands of years before your births. We like to mix cowards and killers together in the game. Sometimes the hardest people in this world go all soft and cuddly on the Otherside and vice versa. It helps make each new game a unique experience.”

What the fuck was the Otherside? I had a sinking feeling about where this was going. Carol seemed completely at ease as she pontificated and waved a hand about gracefully as she spoke.

“I’m going to kill you all in a minute,” she said casually. I tensed and suddenly found myself unable to move again. The pressure of the deep surrounded me. “Then we’re going to ship off your souls to the Otherside. Things are a bit different there but you’ll all get the hang of it fairly quickly I’m sure.” Another glowing smile graced the room. “The main thing you need to wrap your puny brains around is this: only one of you can come back and there’s a reason for that. The last man or woman standing of you six will be eligible to return to this world. I feel it’s important for you to understand the stakes before you get going.”

Some kind of deathmatch? Well these poor fuckers were bang out of luck then. In the corner of my vision I could see James and Jez both locked in place. They had their backs to me but I assumed James at least was mirroring my own thoughts. Killing was my business. Shit, didn’t the green bitch say some of them were innocent? Patricia had leaned back before we all got frozen again so all I could see was the dress covering her chubby knees.

“You’ve all been responsible for deaths, in some way. Mr. Gallagher once beat a man to death in a fit of rage. Colonel Amir, would you like to reminisce about the town of Grahlud? Other than your soldiers you’re the only one who can and most of that troop has died mysteriously in recent years haven’t they?”

Patricia, if only you knew the lives you cost with your disclosure of the seal you found under Hetmeki Bevesh. Not your fault dear, I suppose, but dozens had to be killed as a result. How could you have known beforehand? Jeremy, you obnoxious fucking worm, you know very well what you’ve done don’t you?” She smiled at him in a way that made my flesh crawl. I couldn’t see his reaction, I assume there wasn’t a visible one anyway as the man was frozen like the rest of us. “How many suicides? How many lives ruined? I’m sure my white knight will have fun with you.”

Mr. Mortimer… you are an… interesting one. You don’t perceive the damage you’ve done at all. Always an excuse and a justification. It was like that when I bought it… I’m just trying to provide affordable homes for the plebs… always an excuse in pursuit of profit. “

Well now all of you will get the chance to prove yourselves. Redeem yourselves or indulge yourselves: it will be up to you. No other force will interfere.” She finished her lecture with a snakelike smile that panned across the room.

“What about the other one,” ground out James. I assumed she’d release him enough for him to share his question. If he’d managed to free himself from this vice-like grip that surrounded me I’d tip my hat to the bloke.

“Ah? My paladin? Ironically he’s the most noble of you all despite his profession. Raymond here is a professional killer. An assassin extraordinaire. Most of his victims never even saw him until it was too late. Isn’t that right, my pet?” She glanced over at me in a way that made me want to disappear. My ex-wife had once looked at me like that. After I came back from the wars. Once I’d become my true self.

“Oh he’s so modest! And of all of you I really must keep him locked in place. One slip and the garrotte he’d planned to use on Mr. Mortimer would be around my pretty little throat, wouldn’t it Ray?” She wasn’t entirely wrong but I couldn’t see a way it would work even if I got the chance. Instead I’d be jumping through the window in a heartbeat if she let me move again.

“When you get where you’re going just remember that while all of you have some blood on your hands Raymondo over there is bathed in the stuff. It might even be worth you all-” The air cracked as a voice rumbled through the room. It was deep and came from all around.

“Enough Pos. Stop stacking the deck. Send them on their way and let’s get the game started.” I felt trickles of blood begin to drip from my ears and run down my neck.

“Spoilsport!” Carol pouted. What the fuck was wrong with this woman? Half flirt, half tyrant: all mental. “Fine.” A blade of green glass appeared floating over her left palm and she snatched it from the air. “Morty, you’re going first! It won’t be much of an advantage but I’m sure Ray will be hunting you down early on because you’re such a defenceless turd so make the most of the little extra time you’ll gain!” She grinned and the blade blurred out to sink into Mortimers chest. His eyes bulged but there was no blossom of crimson from the wound. You didn’t get stabbed in the heart without making a mess. Was this all theatre? Was I drugged?

Mortimers body collapsed to the ground and lay there unmoving. Another sign this was fake. Dead men twitch for a while and, I’m sorry to say, they often piss and shit themselves. The utter stillness of the “body” seemed unreal to me. Carol strode from person to person with a smile on her ruby lips and slipped the emerald knife between their ribs in turn.

Finally she strode towards me and smiled down, a long tongue stretching out to catch a bead of sweat falling from her nose. Weird. Did gods sweat? Was this melodrama tiring her? Maybe I was just tripping?

“I’m sure you’ll have fun on the Otherside, Ray. This one should be easy for you to put down.” The blade flicked out again and Patricia slumped in her chair as whatever was binding us all released her in death. “Any last words?”

I found my jaw and face were freed of whatever was controlling them. Probably not drugs then. Whatever madness was happening here might not be fake after all…

“If I win, can I come back?” I asked harshly.

“Only if the others all die first. Then yes, you can come home. Would you like us to get to know one another when you do?” she smiled flirtatiously.

“Oh yeah,” I snarled. I’d get to know her. Find her weaknesses. Ferret out her vulnerabilities and hunt this woman down. High explosives were great against tough targets. I’d blow her into pieces or kill her slowly after making her regret-

A flash of green and I glanced down at a knife handle wrapped in Carol's pale fist. If her hand ends there… and the knife was six inches long… that means the rest of it is buried in my… ah shit.

“Good luck my white knight.”

You have been sacrificed for the entertainment of the gods. Transmigration initiated. Welcome to the War of Six Souls.