I woke at sunset to a strange feeling: warmth in my arms. The scent of rosemary and mint filled my senses as I realized Olivia had an arm wrapped around me, the other curled against my ribs, her head resting against my shoulder. Her heartbeat was slow and even as her contentment lingered on my lips as an unfamiliar, but sweet, taste of essence. It wasn't an emotion I could feed on, so I hadn't spent much time with it.

I didn't want to get up, but soft curves against me made me doubt my own intentions. Besides, until I knew why she was so fascinating, I wouldn't be comfortable in my feelings. If she was somehow Sirje...

It had been more than two hundred years since my maker had been part of my life. If she returned, I knew I would surrender my independence in a heartbeat. The thought that haunted me was: what about Dieter and Charles? Would I just stand by and let Sirje drain them to nothingness as I had watched so many of the humans I had managed to connect to be devoured? Did I truly want her back in my life, no matter the connection between us?

I didn't like the conflict brewing in my chest. I liked things that were simple, clear cut, but I was old enough to know that there would always be shades of gray. If I was honest with myself, what I really wanted was to indulge my basest desires. I wanted to devour without hesitation, luxuriate in sensation, revel in the wealth and power I had accumulated, rip and tear to destroy for the perverse pleasure of it. The Hunger knew only hedonism, something Sirje had exaggerated in me over the centuries we were together. Moderation came into consideration only when survival dictated it.

In moods like this, I was not the safest creature to be around and I knew it. I needed to get some air, lest I do something regrettable.

Olivia stirred against my side, but she wasn't quite awake. Her eyes opened when I shifted to get up, however. "Malle?" she mumbled, at least somewhat aware of where she was.

I halted when her amber eyes caught mine, her gaze half hidden by dark lashes. I didn't move to stop her when she reached across me for the light. It filled half the room with a golden glow, casting enchanting shadows over the rest when she switched it on. I pulled in a deep breath, readying myself to get up. It was a mistake, filling my senses with hints of rosemary and mint again.

"I never really thanked you for helping me." Her words were soft as rose petals. I could see her so painfully clearly in that light, all the hard times that had left faint worry lines and premature silver threads of hair woven in with the brown. It hadn't been enough to break her, however. I could see hope glowing in her expression when she looked at me.

It was such a fragile flower. I knew I could destroy it easily, pluck it apart petal by petal. Such blooms were never long for the world anyway. Hope was perhaps the most easily crushed of human emotions. "You are welcome."

When she leaned in to kiss me, I understood more about her past than I wanted to. I stopped her gently, fingertips against her lips. I heard her heart flutter with anxiety. Before she could pull away, I caught her hand with a delicate touch.

"I do not accept as repayment something that should only be given out of desire," I said gently.

Her brows furrowed. "You didn't exactly seem the hot-cold type in the hotel lounge."

Something in her tone stirred the Hunger. It liked the bite back, the promise of hard bone underneath her softness that I could crack down to the marrow. My hunting instincts liked things that were a challenge. Unfortunately for it and fortunately for her, I was in control. "I apologize if my consideration for your feelings has offended you."

She sighed and turned, sitting on the edge of the bed with her head in her hands. "I'm sorry. I just...I don't know what I was thinking."

I placed a hand on her back. "You were thinking of necessity and survival. Good instincts honed by hard living. In this case, you can help in another way."

She tensed. "Oh?"

"The man who sent thugs after you also sent them after me. I want to know more about him, so I may defend myself and my people." I gave her shoulder a slight squeeze and then let go, slipping out of bed. "After you fill in a few remaining gaps, we can consider the matter of your debt settled."

"And after that?"

I shrugged expressively. "You may do as you please."

That hope flared as brightly as any bonfire. "And what if I want you?" She stepped close, heated fingertips scorching down my arm. Her heart hammered like a drum as the distance between us closed. She stood almost against me.

The Hunger rattled its chain. I knew my eyes had visibly darkened when I heard her pulse spike. I wanted to close the distance between us, to chase passion wherever it would go, to hear that wonderful voice make all its sounds and colors, to taste her lips and forget....

Mercifully, Dieter's knock sounded on the door. I opened it carefully, trying to avoid crushing the door handle in my distracted state. "Is something the matter?"

He shook his head. "I made some stir fry and figured at least Olivia would be awake."

I turned to a suddenly very self-conscious Olivia. She'd slept in her clothes, probably because she didn't have much other than the absolute bare necessities in her go bag. "Go get some food. Dieter and I will be right behind you."

Her stomach growled at the smell of food wafting down the short hall. "Alright," she said reluctantly, heading for the kitchenette.

"I didn't interrupt something, did I?" Dieter asked, rubbing the back of his neck.

"No." I traced the tip of a fang with my tongue, forcing myself not to watch her go. "She is difficult."

"Seems nice to me."

I shook my head. "Not what I meant." Part of me hated that he'd knocked, but it would have happened sooner or later. At least this way, we were dressed and relatively decent.

Dieter turned to me, taking in my expression. He grinned. "You know Malle, you're always saying you like a challenge."

Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on Royal Road.

"Perhaps," I said evenly.

He laughed. "Still thinking about keeping your hands to yourself?"

I glared at him. "Your commentary is not appreciated."

He shrugged. "I mean, if you keep looking at her like that, it's going to happen." When my glare persisted, he put his hands on my shoulders. "Seems like you both could use a good time, Malle."

"That is the problem," I said quietly. "She will want more than a good time."

Dieter shrugged. "So we leave afterwards. Get her a nice, safe vacation in some spiffy part of Europe and we go back to business."

I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose between thumb and forefinger. "I do not want to break her heart, Dieter. It has been done to her so many times already."

"When has that ever stopped you before?" Dieter prodded my sternum with one finger. "I don't know if you've noticed, Malle, but you leave a string of broken hearts behind you that could probably trace the circumference of the planet. Not counting the ones from the people we kill."

"There is usually an understanding," I said bluntly. "Or an exchange."

"I know you haven't been one for a while, Malle, but humans are squishy and full of delicate feels. Just because someone says they are fine with it doesn't mean they are. If you're really so reluctant, you could try making an honest woman out of her. Have a real relationship instead of pining over Sirje's ghost."

The narrowing of my eyes told Dieter that he had taken a step just a little too far. "London," I said in a voice as brittle and sharp as glass. I turned away from him, pulling on actual clothes instead of the flimsier fabric I'd slept in. "After the matter with Mr. Byron is resolved."

"You want me to book her ticket now?"

I shook my head. "Until he is ashes scattered to the four winds, she stays with us. I am not going to give him the opportunity to claim what he desires."

"Whatever you say, Malle," Dieter said with an obedient tone that I didn't entirely believe, following me out into the living room where Charles was chatting with Olivia.

"...really? Why pick up one of his books? They're trash. Creepy trash at that," Olivia said as she filled her plate.

"Oh, for the book signing." Charles grinned when she looked at him like he'd grown a second head. "It's the last place in the world he'll expect Malle to show up at."

"Pity we can't kill him there, in front of the legions of his screaming fans," Dieter mused, picking up a plate. "That'd make a proper statement."

"He's going to have guards!"

"That is seldom a problem for me," I said, taking a seat on the living room couch that faced out to sea instead of the one pointed towards them. "I would very much like to take the measure of the man who has to send his lackeys rather than coming and dealing with his problems himself."

"Are you insane?" Olivia asked, wide-eyed.

I tilted my head back, spreading my arms across the back of the couch. "Dieter, am I sane?"

"Frighteningly so, all things considered," he said, serving himself stir fry. He nudged Olivia with an elbow. "Eat up while it's hot. It's just not the same cold."

"The signing is at midnight," Charles said, checking his watch. The sun was barely a smudge of color on the horizon, slowly bleeding away to complete night. It was quite safe for me. "You've got an hour or two to kill, Malle, accounting for traffic. You could probably take a walk on the beach."

He could read me perhaps too well, but I would take advantage of the opportunity he'd outlined. "That sounds perfect. Will you three be able to hold down the fort here?"

Dieter popped a water chestnut into his mouth and chewed for a moment before answering. "Consider it held."

Charles chuckled. "I think these two crazy kids can hold the place without me. Why don't I come along, Malle? Haven't gotten to spend any time with you lately and I'm not getting any younger."

I lowered my gaze, that reminder filling me with sudden melancholy. "Far be it from me to refuse you." I rose to my feet and motioned for him to lead the way, slipping on a pair of sandals by the door.

Neither of us said anything as we walked out the door and down the street towards the boardwalk, falling into our comfortable silence. Charles understood this particular mood of mine better than Dieter did.

It wasn't until the weathered wood creaked under our feet as we made our way towards the water that Charles finally said what was on his mind. "You know we just want you to be happy, Malle."

"Please tell me what Dieter and I discussed was not audible in the kitchen."

"I made sure to cover anything that might have been audible—kept the pan sizzling, ranted about the Yankees for a bit, the usual." He tucked his hands in his pockets when I stopped to slip off my shoes.

I loved the feeling of sand around my feet. Something about the texture felt so grounding. I rolled my jeans up to my knees, prepared to walk in the waves as they rolled up onto the beach. "I am happy, Charles."

"Do you remember the kid's face when you got him that bicycle?"

I stilled. I remembered it as if it had happened yesterday. A lump welled in my throat. "It was such a little thing, Charles."

"He still carries a picture of it in his wallet. You were the first person who ever cared what he wanted." Charles put his arm around my shoulders. "Or that time this old addict was all alone in that treatment facility until you called and sang him 'Happy Birthday' over the phone?"

"Why are you reminding me of this?" I asked softly.

"Because you forget we care about you, Malle. You'll always be that tough-as-nails, alley cat of a vampire badass, don't get me wrong. But the time and effort you put into people...it can't be a one way street, as much as you try to make it. We want to see you have the same joy we felt in those moments. Otherwise, it's not really much of a relationship. Maybe that's you finding love, maybe it's something else, but we want you to have more than all the suffering and shit you wade through every day. Your Hunger isn't going to make you happy. It's insatiable by nature, never content."

I ducked my head as we approached the waves. "When did you become so wise, Charles?"

He chuckled, taking his own shoes off and rolling up his pants. "I've been around. Maybe not as long or as far as you, but I've been around. I know bad people when I see them, I know good people when I see them."

I sighed in relief as the waves rolled over my feet, lapping against my legs. The water was still warm from the sunny day, though it would cool. "Be honest with me, Charles. Which am I?"

He studied me for a long moment. "You're caught somewhere in between, Malle," he said. "I've seen you cherish and protect people without asking for anything in return. I've seen you destroy people with the same ease, devouring them or just killing them. Sometimes you do worse than that, using people's darkness and weaknesses against them."

"It sounds like my scale tips significantly towards evil." I flicked a strand of hair back behind my ear. "Not that you are incorrect." I looked out at the ocean, letting the soothing sound of the waves calm my thoughts. "That is the nature of my kind. A thin veneer of good to hide the wickedness that lurks behind it. A predator wearing human skin."

Charles shook his head, standing beside me in the waves. "You try, Malle. You try insanely hard. More than anyone else I've met. That means there's more to you than just the monster."

"Perhaps I have you fooled."

He again put his arm around my shoulders. "Trust me on this, Malle. Trust me the way Dieter and I trust you."

I leaned my head against his shoulder. I knew they trusted me implicitly, without a shred of doubt, particularly when shit hit the fan. I wasn't confident I could do the same, not because I doubted them, but because I knew my control and behavior were far from perfect. "I will try."

"Atta girl." He gave me a squeeze. "Think we have time to make a sand castle?"

"Perhaps a quick one, though I did not think to bring a bucket. We will have to sculpt something with our hands." It was an old joke of sorts, his expression of the childhood he had never enjoyed. We'd taken Dieter to the beach to make them many times when he was young, something almost familial in the time spent. "Dieter will be quite cross with us for leaving him behind."

"Nah, now he can grill Olivia in peace."

"Poor woman," I said as I knelt in the sand. With the strength in my hands, it was easy to dig and sculpt sand even without a bucket or a shovel. He joined me without a second thought, easing himself down onto his aging knees.

By the time the alarm on my phone went off, we had created a sand dragon, serpentine body and neck curled even as the wings laid out to its back. The eyes were sand-dollars I had found a little further down the beach. Its claws, sharp and deadly, stretched as if it was just waking up.

Even as I worked, my thoughts turned inevitably towards Luke Byron. A faint smile crossed my lips. I was looking forward to rattling his cage.