Every night, if I fall asleep, I dream of a man shrouded in darkness, who stalked me and another man who helps me get away. This dream started when I was in my teens, and continued even when I became an adult. Even when we run away as fast as possible, even when the distance between us and the man shrouded in darkness grew, the man would still be able to catch up to us.

When we thought we escaped and we were catching our breaths. The nice man suddenly said to me with a smile.

"Don't worry, as long as you're with me I'll help you"

When I heard this, I felt relieved and an emotion I can't pinpoint at that time. These emotions weren't new. Just as I was about to pinpoint that emotion was, the man shrouded in darkness suddenly appeared. When we were about to run again, I felt the whole world slowly crumbling as if to tell me that its almost time for me to wake up.

When I woke up, I was covered in sweat, it was as if I went to a marathon and didnt stop or take any breaks. After calming myself down, I would go to the bathroom and take a shower in order to refresh both my body and mind. I would repeat the same routine ever single day. I didnt feel any emotions, as if the world lost its vibrancy.

When I fell asleep, the dream that I always dreamt about started to change. When the dream started, it was the same routine at first, I was chased by the man shrouded in darkness and soon the nice man helped me get away. After the nice man helped me and lead me somewhere, I noticed that this route we took was different from the usual route we used to run away from the man shrouded in darkness. The nice man pointed at a warehouse and I followed, when we were about to catch our breaths, I suddenly lost consciousness. When I woke up, I noticed that I was tied up and gagged, causing me to panic. When I was looking at my surroundings in a panic, I noticed the nice man standing there with tools and when the nice man picked up the tool, he came to me and started inflicting pain upon me. I tried to shout but the gag in my mouth prevented me from shouting, the only thing that could be heard was a whimper. When I saw the nice man, he would only look at me with emotionless eyes, it was as if the person that helped me and the person standing in front of me and torturing me were different people. He continued to torture me, ignoring my whimpers.

How long has it been since the nice guy, no, I should call him, the torturer rather than nice guy. I dont know how long has it been when he started inflicting pain upon me. I stopped trying to resist. Just as I was about to lose hope, the man shrouded in darkness barges in, at that time, I felt as if the my whole world came crashing down. When I was about to fully give up on everything, however, something deep within me felt hope, relief, and sadness at the sight of the man shrouded in darkness. When I was confused as to why I felt these emotions, the man shrouded in darkness said something, it was the very first word I heard him say ever since I started to dream about all of this.

"Finally" his words filled with relief, anger, sadness, and despair.

Even when the man barged in the torturer seems to ignore him, just as the torturer got closer to continue, the man shrouded in darkness lunge forward and tackled the torturer to the ground and freed me. The man helped me get up and get out of that place. I was still confused as to why this man helped me, we stopped, because it seemed that the torturer didnt chase after us. When we were catching our breath, I saw the man up close for the first time and this time he wasnt shrouded in darkness, as I saw the face of the man, I felt sad, happy, relieved, guilt and apologetic. At the same time I felt these emotions, it felt as if something buried deep inside me began to resurface.

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The man shrouded in darkness wasnt trying to harm me, he was trying to save me. As I saw his face, my father's face, I cried and cried until I felt my tears run out. Even while I was apologizing to my father, he was just there smiling at me as if I didnt do anything wrong.

I could hear him say, "It's alright, everything is going to be alright".

As I recall the memories of the last time I was with my father, I begged for forgiveness even harder.

My father was an ordinary man, but also my hero since he was a police officer. Even when we fought and I would yell at him, and even when he would scold me, we would always reconcile. I remember the last time I saw my father alive as if it was just yersteday. It was just an ordinary day, I went to my school, hang out with friends, learned something in my classes. However, everything went downhill when I was trying to go home. Some random guy stopped and asked for directions, I thought he looked nice and decided to help him and after talking to him about which route he would need to take, I blacked out. The next thing I knew was that I was tied up and gagged preventing me to scream. I dont know how many minutes, hours or even days I was held captive.

When i started losing hope, I heard the door of where I was held captive opened, I thought it was my last day on earth when that door opened but when I saw who opened it, it was my father. I felt relieved and happy.

"Thank god, you're alright" said my father, his words filled with worry, happiness, and relief while helping me.

I cried and hugged my father, my father too, hugged me and said that we should go outside since he called for backup. When we were outside I noticed my father became paler and his breathing was unsteady. I suggested that we should stop and catch our breaths, when we were catching our breaths, I noticed that there was blood on the clothes of my father and a bullet hole where the blood is coming from. Once I noticed that my father was shot, panic took over and I tried to stop my father from bleeding out.

As I was trying to stop the bleeding, my father said "It's alright, everyrhing is going to be alright".

I shouted, "No, its not gonna be alright, please, just dont give up until help arrives" my words filled with sadness.

While trying to stop the bleeding, my father knew he wouldn't make it but still smiled as if nothing matters except I was alright. I kept on shouting that he shouldn't give up, that he can still make it to the hospital. My vision became blurry because of the tears that I couldnt hold back. My father suddenly patted my head like he was comforting a crying child, and my father would keep on saying that it will be alright with a smile on his face until his last breath.

"I'm sorry, i'm sorry, because of me you-you're..." I couldn't even finish my sentence because of my crying.

My father only patted my head while listening to my apologies.

"Look at me" my father said.

When I looked to face him, I saw a smile, the same smile when he saved me.

"I'm glad I saved you, I will always choose to save you even if I went back in the past" my father said with a gentle smile.

When I heard my father say those words, It felt as if a weight was lifted. As I was feeling this, my father patted my head and smiled once again.

"It seems its time to wake up" my father said with a smile as bright as the sun.

As I woke up, I burst into tears, it was tears filled with relief, acceptance, sadness and happiness. When I finished crying I took the day off and visited my fathers grave early this year. I talked about my dream, talked about how I felt after his death, how I struggled to forgive myself and eveything that I havent told him yet. When I got back home, I went straight to bed and never dreamt of that dream again, it was replaced with a pleasant dream.