Solace came as a brief moment shared in the park. Awkwardness extended between them as it ended. A side of true weakness from Ayumi took Yuki aback a little. It reminded him that despite being a hardened soldier, she was human. They soon left the park to return to friends.
When they came to the former intersection of the neighborhood Ayumi took a different direction away from where Yuki lived. He rushed over in front of her when he realized what had happened. “Hey Ayumi, our houses are back that way!”
“I know, but we aren’t going home just yet.” She began to walk around Yuki resuming her pace until he caught back up to her once more standing in her way. “We’ll be late if you keep this up.”
“Late? Late to what?”
“There is somewhere we both need to be soon.”
“Which is?”
Ayumi stepped around him, continuing in spite of his interruptions. “You’ll learn when we get there. Now hurry up!” The deeper rough tone came out in her voice echoing it as an order that Yuki couldn’t ignore.
The mysterious walk through the abandoned neighborhood streets of the city left Yuki plenty of time to think. None of it proved to be helpful for him, but since Ayumi remained quiet the entire time there was little left for him to do. However, the confusion that Yuki felt suddenly intensified the moment he saw where they had stopped. It mixed with uneasiness and a slow unwanted feeling of clarity.
Yuki looked over at Ayumi, narrowing his eyes at her in a question. “Why are we at a cemetery?”
“You’re smart enough. I think you can figure it out.” Ayumi took a couple of steps forward entering the threshold of the cemetery. She paused and waited knowing that Yuki was not following her.
It had been a while since the last time he had visited a cemetery. The images of the past from when his mother and father had died echoed through his thoughts. He couldn’t keep the past away from him as much as he wanted to forget at that moment. This was a different cemetery, but it didn’t make a difference to him. The memories were linked. Yuki wanted to back away and run, yet the reason for what it meant today appeared. It froze him immediately from being able to retreat or even advance. “I’m sorry, Ayumi, but I’m not ready to see him.”
“No one is ever ready.” Ayumi kept her back to Yuki looking forward through the rows of headstones. “It doesn’t matter how much anyone prepares themselves for it…you’re never ready…never…” The fading echo in her voice was piercing as though it came from inside holding a deeper understanding of the word’s meaning.
Chapter 71 – The Farewell
Ayumi reached back with her hand, still not looking at him, grabbing his hand and guiding him on. ‘…Ayumi’s hand…she’s shaking, but why?’ Yuki looked up towards the back of Ayumi trying to understand what he was feeling from her. Unfortunately, there was nothing that she allowed him beyond her hand.
Several aisles of burials later Ayumi came to a stop abruptly. Yuki hadn't been paying much attention to his surroundings, having been solely focused on Ayumi. So he didn’t take notice of the company that fell in around him. “Why did you stop, Ayumi?”
“I brought him! As promised!” Ayumi declared releasing Yuki from her hold very quickly under the stealth of her announcement. The tone in her voice quickly covered up any of the subtleties that had been leaking through her.
Yuki took a moment to look at Ayumi, confused by who she could be speaking to, before examining those around him. It made him step back a little seeing that Saki, Hiroshi and Tatsuya were all standing in front of him. There was a long pause between them as Yuki quickly felt incredibly awkward and guilty. The depression and sorrow that he had thought that he had overcome began to overwhelm him, staring at them. “…everyone…”
“Hey Yuki!” Hiroshi sounded a little too happy for the occasion. He stepped out from the others looking to greet Yuki back from his long vacation. A brief second waited while Hiroshi smiled at Yuki before his friend was greeted by Hiroshi’s fist. It was enough to send Yuki to the ground and slide across the stone tile kicking up dust and dirt throughout the entire area.
Saki reached forward and grabbed a hold of Hiroshi's wrist. “Hey! This is a cemetery! You can’t be making so much noise!”
“Don’t give me that, Saki! I know you were wanting to hit him just as much as me!”
Ayumi ran off after Yuki to check on him. She found him on his back propped up against a headstone that belonged to a long deceased family. “Hey you alright?”
“Yeah…I think so…” He looked up at Ayumi and then back over at his friends. She helped him up off the stone and back to his feet. Yuki marched back over to Hiroshi once all of the feeling was back in his body. He tried to ignore the pain in his face. “What was that for? I thought we were—“
“I thought we were friends, Yuki!”
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“Huh?” Yuki blinked back at Hiroshi a little confused for being interrupted by exactly what he was trying to say. There was a sense that he was expecting it to happen from someone, but Hiroshi seemed like the last person that was going to punch him.
Hiroshi moved forward closer to Yuki. “You’re not the only one that’s hurting because of Kazuhiro! You think it’s all your fault that it happened, huh?” Another step from Hiroshi moved him close enough to Yuki that Yuki backed away a little looking uncomfortable. “Don’t be so arrogant and self-centered. Kazuhiro chose to be there like we all did. It was that other guy that killed him, not you! That Alex guy, right?” He stared at Yuki under the expectation of getting a response from him. The expectation took a while for it to click with Yuki.
Yuki gave Hiroshi an uncertain nod not knowing where all the yelling was leading. “…yeah…” The hesitation and confusion in Yuki's voice brought Hiroshi in towards Yuki even more intently than before. Yuki leaned away no longer certain what Hiroshi wanted from him.
“Right?”
“Yeah?” Hiroshi didn’t seem any more pleased with Yuki response leaning in further at him. “Yeah!” Yuki tried again feeling as though Hiroshi wanted him to repeat himself until he was satisfied. Hiroshi hadn't backed off. “Yes!” shouted Yuki loudly back at Hiroshi which startled the others around him, but made Hiroshi pleased.
Hiroshi backed away and walked around to Yuki’s side looking over at him. “You thought that I would blame you for what happened. You thought we’d all blame you for what happened with the school and everything else.” He stretched out his arm around Yuki's shoulder, grabbing him firmly. “We’re all friends here, Yuki. It doesn’t matter what happens or what you do. True friends would never blame you. I don’t care what anyone else says about you, Yuki. We’re friends and friends support and look out for each other. If you’re not here then how are we supposed to support you and help you?”
A drawn out pause from Yuki allowed him to take everything in. He became a little reminded of what Ayumi had told him. It made him feel a little better knowing that there were friends that would stand by him. The worst thing that he had feared was losing them all because of the mistakes that he had made. Yuki felt like he could smile looking from Hiroshi over to Saki and Tatsuya. “Thanks, everyone…”
Hiroshi dragged Yuki over to the grave that marked Kazuhiro's resting place, the family grave. He looked down at his friend, losing a bit of the cheerful glow that had been in his face. “Hey man… I brought Yuki here like I promised… We’re together again so you keep an eye on him when we can’t, alright?” Hiroshi roughed Yuki up a little, working up a smile again to lighten the air.
“Hey! This is a cemetery have some respect!” yelled Saki at him threatening to hit him.
“You’re being just as noisy, Saki!”
“Hiroshi you…”
Ayumi kept her distance from them, watching merely as an observer. It was a comforting sight to see them looking in better spirits. In front of the yelling was Yuki kneeling down towards the grave. Most of what he said was distorted by those behind him, however a little of what he said managed to make it to Ayumi.
“I’m sorry… I’m sorry, I tried to protect you…”
A distant voice in the back of Ayumi’s mind playing from the past echoed painful memories.
‘I’m sorry… I’m sorry, I tried to protect you…’
They were far more recent memories than she wished to admit, but seeing Yuki before the grave unwillingly triggered them. She tried to ignore them and push them away, yet the emotions were too strong to be ignored.
‘Come back! Please come back! Don’t leave me alone!’
Ayumi turned her head down covering her eyes in dark shadows as she fought with her emotions.
‘I’m sorry! Please don’t leave me alone! I can’t…’
Crying between the shaking words became clearer in mind. The unwanted past filled her up. It was unavoidable for her. It was nearly two months before back in her homeland where she found herself in the same position as Yuki was today.
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Eudokia knelt before a grave unable to keep herself from crying though she knew her training told her it was a weakness. The one man that had been her support and changed her life had died, her King. He was gone, forever. All Eudokia would know once more was the emptiness of solitude. “I don’t want to be alone anymore! I can’t go on without you! I don’t want to… I’d rather wither and die here…” She hung her arms over the massive sprawling stone marker of her dead King.
Quietly approaching from behind Eudokia was an aging man dressed formally in the military uniform of the homeland. He came to stop at the grave not looking down at Eudokia trying to provide a sense of respect and dignity earned by her position. “Such words are too harsh on yourself, Eudokia.”
Swollen and deeply red from tears, her eyes only briefly looked back already knowing who it was before. “What are you doing here Demosthenes? Shouldn’t the General of the Army be at the assembly?”
“They are in recess currently.”
“So you’re with those jackals that didn’t even wait for his body to go cold before declaring the Ritual of Succession to begin.”
“It is the law. You know as well as I do without a new King our home will fall into ruin. Without an heir a new King must be found quickly if we are to survive.”
Eudokia glared over at him, finally looking up at Demosthenes. She bore him great venom for his cold and rational thought over the death of someone so important to her. “He was your King too! How can you be so cold about his death! You sided so quickly with those politicians that have been trying to overthrow the King. You never cared for him! He never mattered to you!”
Demosthenes took her shouting with measure and gave pause before responding knowing how much she would despise him. “I’ve always followed the law. The law is what has kept us alive these years. Following it will ensure that we continue no matter the path.”
“Bastard!” Eudokia spat back as she stood up from the ground. She gave him a piercing glare up into his eyes. “You’ll never understand!” Eudokia began walking away from him leaving the cemetery that was filled with the Kings of the past.
“The assembly is requesting your presence since you were the Captain of the Royal Guard.”
She broke her step coming to a stop hearing the insulting words from him. “I will not indulge cowards and backstabbers in their games for a power play. My King is dead and I will serve no other King. Tell them that!”
“You have lost someone important to you, Eudokia. But remember it is the duty of those that live to keep those that have gone alive within. You’re never alone.”
“I don’t need to be consoled by an old man like you that has already forgotten his King that he has served for so long.” Eudokia marched out of the cemetery leaving Demosthenes alone.
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Ayumi blinked briefly, catching herself from her emotions that were carried to the surface from her memories. She shifted her legs and weight a little to loosen up the stiffness that started to set in from her unmoved position watching Yuki and his friends. ‘Perhaps here…perhaps I’m not alone…’