A new realm. A different sort of existence. An existence, this time… with form! Indeed, I now had form! Furthermore, a form that could feel! Yes, I could feel!

…I could feel!

A supreme and wonderful bliss washed over me. It was like emptiness made whole! Like bindings sloughed off! In a childlike giddiness I explored my new form.

Ten fingers, ten toes. A head, two arms, and two legs. A torso and hips connecting them all together. It was a form I was most familiar with. A human! This was a human! Somehow, this form felt dangerously small and weak, but it was definitely human, at least! And this human me is… currently… floating… in a….

Come to think of it, where exactly am I?

I focus my newfound senses towards understanding my environment. Unaccustomed to my new body, my weak limbs tremble as I try to stretch them out. A pleasantly warm liquid resists my tiny movements. I tilt my small head slightly. How strange. From my knowledge, humans are unable to survive extended periods of time submerged in water. Hmm?

Aren’t I in a dangerous predicament right now then? By all accounts I should be suffocating in here, correct? Still…

Here I felt safe. I couldn’t really explain the feeling. It wasn’t a conclusion I reached through logic, or reasoning. It was something primal. An instinct, I suppose? From the core of my being, I was at peace. In this place I was warm and happy. Yes. Here was safe. I was safe in here. Good, good.

After finally gaining form, my first experience with feeling was the blanketing warmth of comfort and security.

My second experience was pain.

A horrifically sharp pain tore out from my left shoulder. It was like a knife digging through my flesh. The terrifying new sensation left me in a stupor, the sensory overload shocking me frozen. I was dazed, simply unable to react. Until it happened again a second time.

An intense, searing pain ripped out from the left side of my neck. My body convulsed, and I thrashed about. My heart was beating dangerously fast. With every pulse my neck throbbed painfully. I felt betrayed. How could this be? I was supposed to be safe in here. Instead I was attacked by a terrible agony I couldn’t even defend against. I wanted to cry. I wanted to scream. And a cry did come out. But not from me.

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It came from around me. The sound of a young woman’s painful cry resonated through the liquid that surrounded me. The voice was muffled, but it filled me with a sense of familiarity. My environment shook in time with the woman’s labored breathing. Though barely, I managed to discern the voice of a young man calling out.

“…sha!? Tri…a, wha…ong!?

“It’s the baby! Cam, she’s…!

Another sharp pain shoots through my left cheek. The intense burning sensation caused my body to shudder, twisting and turning as if to shake off the unbearable stinging. Again, the environment shook, and again the woman cried out.

“Ah!”

“…isha, ..at’s happen…!? Are … kay!?

“I, agh! I’m fine! I’m fine, but the baby is…!”

Ah. I understand now. This voice belongs to my…. mother. I see, yes, then it makes sense. The young woman is my mother. The young man is likely my father. And I…

I am their child. No, it seems I’ve not been born yet. Not a child yet, not even yet an infant. I am simply a fetus. A parasite, leeching off of Mother’s vitality. She, thanklessly providing nutrition, shelter, and comfort… and I, unilaterally benefiting from the arrangement. And in what manner do I repay her?

The pain cuts through my left eye. My body spasms. Mother cries out again.

“Tri…a!”

“Cam, the baby! Something’s happening to our baby!”

“…sha, do… I-! I’ll fi…re something out, so y… to tell me what’s wrong!”

“I don’t know! I don’t know what’s happening! Cameron!”

I am utterly ashamed. In my ignorance, in my weakness, I have caused Mother suffering. No. This is not right. This is not how it should be. A woman in pregnancy must suffer much to begin with. I will not allow myself to add to her suffering.

The pain shoots through my forehead. It hurts tremendously. My limbs tremble and quake. But this time, I hold my body in place. Endure! I must endure it! This pain, it comes from my body! Therefore Ihave the responsibility to deal with it myself! I will not allow my pain become Mother’s pain!

Every nerve in my body stings. My limbs twitch uncontrollably. Small tears escape my closed eyes mixing with the surrounding fluid. My surroundings shake with Mother’s ragged breathing.

“Right, yes, a doctor! Cam, we have to call a doctor!”

“A …tor? But the fa…ly doctor…”

“The village doctor, then! Quickly, we’ll have to-!”

“Abso… not! I cannot all.. to move in y.. condition!”

“Cameron!”

“So, I’ll bring … to you.”

“But, my family…”

“I’ll handle th… eave the rest to me!”

“Cameron… I’m sorry. Thank you.”

“Anyth… for you, Trisha..”

Footsteps. A door, perhaps? In my fading consciousness, in my watery nest, the sounds are difficult to distinguish. But it seems after a time, the man who is my father is gone.

“…Stay strong, won’t you? Mama will fix this. It’ll be alright, just stay… stay strong…”

It hurts. It hurts so much. My body shudders, but I hold it in. I can handle this. I have to handle this. For Mother’s sake.

That’s right, Mother. Right now I’m weak. Right now I am nowhere near strong. So this is all I can do for you. But I promise. One day I will definitely repay you for everything you’ll have given to me. I will be a good child. I absolutely will.

That’s why, Mother.

Please don’t cry.