Fuzzy and Sasha - Saturday August 11th - Morning - Ares Macrotechnology Arcolog

Fuzzy bubbled over with shame. She felt stupid. She felt stupid for feeling stupid. She tried to tell Sasha the truth earlier and would have eventually, but her secret was so big. It'd be like trying to swallow a whole poached egg. She could've did it, but it was so much easier to take small bites. She wanted to dole out small truths when she was comfortable and ready. Now she feared losing her only friend in the world.

With that fear was pain and it redoubled as she feared that pain of loss. She feared it more than hunger, more than failure in a hunt, more than breaking a weapon or being chased by ghouls or packs of devil rats. It nestled in her stomach and clawed at her and she clutched her belly with both hands as if it would claw its way out of her.

Sasha stood there, feeling awkward; her feet were set wide, her body language unsure. Sasha looked at her, but then turned away. Fuzzy's heart broke and a choked sob escaped her in front of those security offices. After hours of fear and frustration she felt as raw as a scraped pelt. She felt exposed to her friend.

“Friend?” Fuzzy silently, asked herself.

She wasn’t so sure anymore. She thought Sasha was going to turn and leave. That she might abandon her. She didn't. Instead she awkwardly side shuffled towards Fuzzy. Her shoes squeaked against the bright white tile of the floor. She didn't hug Fuzzy, because Sasha knew that Fuzzy didn't like to be touched, and so Sasha pressed her side against hers. Sasha was a few inches taller than her, but more willowy. Fuzzy was far smaller, but more compact. And they just awkwardly stood there.

Unsure of what to make of this, her pain and shame subsided, but didn’t end. Instead they waited for weakness, ready to pounce and consume her.

"You're sort of hard to look at right now," whispered Sasha.

Fuzzy could understand that. Those wriggling fears and clawing pains began to stir again.

"I was going to tell you," whispered Fuzzy, quietly, "I just didn't know how. Everything is so different and it happened all at once. I didn't...."

Sasha pointedly looked towards Fuzzy.

"Look at me," she said.

Fuzzy looked. Sasha's face contorted with pain and nausea. Here it came. This was the moment that Sasha would reject her. Fuzzy braced herself for being told to leave.

"You are hard to look at," said Sasha, pointedly, "Because you feel so bad."

Sudden understanding dawned within Fuzzy. It would be easy to tell Fuzzy to leave without looking at her, but she looked at her anyway.

"You're not going to send me away?" she asked, hopefully.

"No. I'm not going to send you away," she said, irritably, and then, more gently, "I want to hug you, but I might barf. I'll still do it if you want to though."

Joy bubbled up inside of Fuzzy. It was so dumb and inappropriate that she couldn't help feel good for just a second. She managed a smile.

"Please don't barf," whispered Fuzzy.

"I'm really trying," she whispered back.

They hugged anyway in the sight of the armed corporate security of Ares Macrotechnology and the last of the corporate wage slaves that streamed in to begin their normal seven to seven Saturday morning shift. It was 6:55 AM.

In the end they were late to their appointment to go hunting. So Sasha took Fuzzy by the arm and led her to a restaurant for breakfast. They got a private booth in the back. Sasha switched on a white noise generator which generated a bubble of soft noise. Then the noise of the restaurant was too hard to focus on and impossible to pick out anyone's conversation, like trying to see when your vision was blurry or when something was too far away.

Fuzzy thought it was strange at first that Sasha sat next to her and about the white noise generator, but Sasha wrapped an arm around her shoulder and brought Fuzzy in close. Fuzzy checked with herself and found that she didn't mind being touched. Just this once, she told herself.

The two girls talked in that quiet booth about their lives. Sasha talked about her isolation and loneliness. She talked about her inability to keep friends and her hesitance to open up to people for fear that they’d discover her disability. How invasive she felt when she looked at people and how invaded she felt when certain people looked at her with bad intent. She talked about how she avoided certain people because they made her fear greasy or dirty, but didn't elaborate beyond that.

Fuzzy talked about her fears. Fear of hunger, fear of injury, fear of being eaten by devil rats or ghouls, fear of sickness, fear of gangs, fear of losing even a single arrow or breaking what was once upon a time her only weapons. She shared the story of breaking her only bowstring and not having enough to pay Rat Man for another when she first received her bow, and how he gave her another anyway. She shared the story about two men fighting over a box of soy noodles because one cup was missing only for one to kill the other, even though Kenji had told her not to tell that story to anyone. How she scrounged the body afterwards for the slim pickings that hadn't been scrounged by the other man, despite the fact that she knew the smell of death would bring ghouls. How she would burn trash in the winter to stay warm, but couldn't always stay warm because not all trash would burn.

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The young women shared everything like friends do. Like best friends, even though they didn't really understand one another. Fuzzy had a long cry with Sasha. It was the first time she'd allowed herself to be weak like this in front of another person since she was a little girl too weak to pull a bow string or set a spear. She talked about Rat Man took her in and gave her a safe place to live and how she'd lived and worked in his house, processing the barrens bush meat from the older children who hunted. She had to explain to Sasha that that was one of the happiest days of her life and one of her earliest memories. Sasha didn't understand, but she could see the remnants of relief and joy borne upon her soul while she relived the memory.

"Are you hungry?" asked Sasha. "We've been here an hour and a half and haven't eaten anything."

Fuzzy wasn't hungry, but she knew from experience that that would change and balked at the idea of turning down a meal.

"A little," said Fuzzy.

"We should get out of this booth. Dad is going to give me an earful when he knows I used a private booth," she grumped, "All the money in the world and he still chews me out about spending too much. Your face is a mess though. Here."

She produced a fancy looking cloth from the table and held it out to Fuzzy. Fuzzy, not understanding, found her face gently brushed moments later by that cloth when she didn't take it for herself. It was so soft and clean.

"Sorry," said Sasha, anxiously. "Anyway, let's have some quick breakfast and get to hunting."

They slipped out of their booth and went to a different booth, this one not private. The sounds of the restaurant were back now that the white noise generator wasn't active and near them, though Fuzzy didn't know why it had been that way. She just knew that sounds were distinct and that she could actually hear what people were saying now.

Fuzzy was introduced to pancakes which she loved pancakes and her love of condiments on things like hot dogs extended to syrup, strawberries and whipped cream on her pancakes. Just like a hot dog, she asked for and received liberal amounts of all three. So in the end her pancake was more syrup, strawberries and whipped cream than pancake. She also had bacon on the side. Porks are delicious after all, and she enjoyed the crispy, salty, savory, meaty flavor of the bacon. Sasha ate a much smaller breakfast and quirked a smile at Fuzzy.

"You're going to get fat," said Sasha.

"Where I come from, fat means you're successful,” said Fuzzy.

"Well it's not here...Shit, screw it," said Sasha, "Hey, give me a bite of that."

Even an hour and a half late the girls were still able to sign up for bow training though the hunt had to be rescheduled for tomorrow as there was someone who'd reserved the grounds after them. It was trivial to get bow training now and set up a time for a hunt tomorrow though. Like Sasha said this was a hunting ground for Knight-Errant, and as the new police force in town they were far busier than when they were as mere corporate security. As Seattle's main police force, and a private one at that, they were busy trying to establish themselves so they didn't lose their contract back to Lone Star, the other competing corporate police force.

And so the girls traipsed through the enormous wooded area that was literally inside of the arcology with their instructor. Fuzzy found the idea of an "inside outdoors" fascinating. Their instructor taught them how to shoot a bow, how to thrust with a spear, how to hold a knife without cutting themselves, how to set a snare, how to move in the forest and at Fuzzy's request, how to dress a killed deer, though she had to watch that on her commlink since one wasn’t immediately available.

Fuzzy found that while she learned a few new things, she knew most of this already. Sasha on the other hand was learning tons of new things and both the instructor and Fuzzy helped Sasha when she didn't understand something or fumbled. It seemed obvious in retrospect, but Sasha knew nothing about how to navigate, how to move silently, how to start a fire, shoot a bow, wield a spear, hold a knife, set a snare or basically do anything in the woods at all. All of it was new to her, but she took to it with a will. Sasha wouldn't have lasted a day out in the barrens and Fuzzy resolved never to never take her, even if she begged her to.

Hours later Fuzzy was tired and Sasha was exhausted. Both of the girls were sweaty, but Sasha was absolutely drenched with sweat from the effort. They walked back to the entrance of the park.

"You did stuff like this every day of your life?" asked Sasha.

"Yes. Every day," said Fuzzy, "Some days I'd stalk my prey, some days I'd wait. I used traps a lot for bigger animals."

Sasha's eyes unfocused for a moment and she frowned. Fuzzy could tell that Sasha wasn’t looking at Fuzzy’s emotions in the astral, but her smart contact lenses brightened as information flashed across it.

"Oh, that little bitch," she muttered.

Sasha looked like she was fuming, but schooled her features and put on a nervous smile.

"What?" asked Fuzzy.

"Heyyyy...Sooooo...About spending the night at my place," she said, as she dodged the question, “I'll have to ask my dad...Again...And probably clear it with security...But you can still stay the night. You know, sleep over. It'll be a real hassle to get you back to school and I’d have to pick you up in the morning anyway. You should stay! Really. Stay."

"What's wrong?" asked Fuzzy.

Sasha worried at her lip.

"I just got an anonymous text from someone about you, Kenji and Julie not being...You know," said Sasha, with a sigh, "I'm pretty sure it was Christina, but I don't think I can prove it. It's...Pretty bad."

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