Liam had spent two days riding in one of their medical wagons. There hadn’t been much to do, other than laying on one of the stretchers and feeling every bump of the road jolt through him.

The others hadn’t been much of a company. After the attack, the medical wagons were pretty full of people like Liam, but his wagonmates by circumstance were all heavily medicated mercenaries who had carried some of the brunt of the attack.

The fact that he was put into the same wagon as them, should’ve been cause for concern, but Liam had simply never entertained the idea. The doctors had told him that his spirit had simply been too overtaxed from the battle and he was in shock from the experiences. They didn’t even mention the third-degree burns on his hands as the major reason for his stay.

They were right in a way. Liam felt weak and overtaxed, but he knew it was mostly from how much he had overdrawn his mana. He had pushed his ability and mana reserves farther than he should have, and now he was dealing with the backlash from that.

Barney and some others from the wagon came from time to time. Even Marten and Katarina and Blue checked in on him. Only Jerem was absent.

With all the time Liam had on his hands, he started worrying. Was there a reason his friend didn’t show up? When would he tell the rest of the caravan? It was only a matter of time until everybody would find out, and then they would be treating him differently.

Would Blue force him to join the mercenaries and be on the front lines? How would his wagon mates react after he had deceived them the whole time? Liam didn’t even want to think about what Bilby’s reaction would be.

Once he was discharged, with two thick bandages around his hands and orders to return every two days to change them, Liam beelined straight toward his wagon. He wanted to talk with Jerem. Needed to.

Only to find himself lacking the courage when he was suddenly face to face with the other man. It took him three attempts and a lot of courage to finally ask Jerem what the problem was.

And when he did, he was surprised by the forceful nature of Jerem’s reply.

“Why did you never tell me?”

Liam had asked himself that question many times already. It wasn’t like he was technically obliged to. There wasn’t such a thing as a friendship contract and Pantheon knew, he had been more than a little secretive to all the people in his life so far. Almost all of them at least.

Still, he couldn’t deny it felt like a little betrayal. Jerem had done so much for him and had become sort of an anchor for his new life in the caravan. It was almost impossible hard to not talk with that guy.

Now looking at him, Liam saw a little hurt in the man’s brown eyes. Guilt gnawed at his stomach.

“I don’t know,” he said eventually. “I wanted to keep you safe.”

“That’s a convenient excuse,” Jerem snorted.

“It is no excuse. I really only thought about your safety.”

It was true in a way. Liam knew firsthand how dangerous his secret could be. Telling Jerem would’ve put him in danger.

That didn’t change that he felt like he had done something wrong though.

“Were you afraid I would be jealous?” His voice was icy.

“Pantheon no.”

“Good, because I wouldn’t be. I think it’s great that you’re blessed, I really do. But why didn’t you fucking tell me Liam? Why even go through all these lengths just to lie to me and all of the other people?”

“I wasn’t lying, I was just… I had my reasons.”

Jerem shook his head. “You’re full of bullshit. I can’t believe it. I thought you were a good guy.”

“Easy mistake to make.”

“Stop trying to play it cool even now,” Jerem said, agitated. “I don’t know what got you so stuck in your own arse, but I can’t deal with it anymore.”

“What got me stuck in my own arse?” Liam asked, his temper suddenly somewhat rising. “What the hell got you stuck in your arse, eh? It’s not like you ever shared anything about yourself. Fucking half the caravan doesn’t even know where you’re from.”

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“So what is your excuse?” Liam asked. “What’s your reason for being stuck?”

“I… I had-”

“You had your reasons, didn’t you?”

“It’s different!” Jerem was getting angry now. “Some things are not mine to tell. But that’s different from you being a cultivator. You’re a whole fucking different breed and didn’t even bother mentioning to anyone that they were sitting next to something supernatural right now.”

“Oh, you fuckhead.”

After that, their argument had only degenerated further.

----------------------------------------------------------

Afterward, Liam had expected everyone in the caravan to find out about his secret identity, the news spreading like a wildfire. He could already imagine Bilby turning up before him, wanting vengeance more for his product than for Trake, but vengeance nonetheless.

He could almost hear the gossip. Could almost see the shock on his wagon mates' faces and feel them starting to treat him differently. But none of these things happened.

Instead, it seemed that despite their falling out, Jerem had truly told no one about Liam’s predicament.

The man who he had saved had no idea it was Liam who had done it. So he was happy Jerem had been the only real witness.

Fortunately, his lessons with Marten continued somewhat normal. It allowed him to take his mind off of things.

“Lift your knee a little bit higher. And try to get the torque out of your hip. You want to have almost as much range as with a normal punch.”

Liam tried but got off balance and almost stumbled.

“Not that much torque.”

“I hate kicking,” Liam sighed. “Can we not do something else? I get that pushups and stuff are out of the question for now,” he gestured at his hands. “But do you not have a different kata you can show me?”

“No running until you can crawl,” Marten shook his head.

“But wouldn’t it also be the perfect time to start with some other cultivation exercises?”

“How many more times should I tell you? I don’t have much to teach you in that regard. I have techniques that are… let’s say not specifically for you, and in general mana stuff I think you would do better going to your new teacher.”

There was a little distaste in his voice towards the end. Liam knew it wasn’t from any ill will against him, and probably also not against Katarina. It was just that the outcome of the last fight grated a little on Marten.

The sole reason they had won had been Katarina. Liam had been too out of it to see at the end, but apparently, the woman had brought down the giant beast with an extremely flashy spell. Which was what Marten usually did.

“It wasn’t your day,” Liam said. “That happens to the best of cultivators, no? Besides that, Hydreer was really a counter to you.”

Liam had only learned the name of the monster after their battle. It was a pretty uncommon side on their side of the Deepsend, but not uncommon enough that people hadn’t managed to tell him stories.

A Beast King with the body of a deer, but the blood and magical capabilities of a hydra. With its unique array of spells, they were usually very hard to pin down for melee fighters like Marten. They had been lucky that theirs hadn’t also possessed equal healing abilities.

A weak smile played over Marten’s face. “I don’t need your excuses, but thank you still. It’s lucky your new friend seems to be pretty competent.”

“She’s not my new friend.”

“Whatever,” Marten snorted. “By the looks of her skills, she seems to be close to the second stage. Some of her skills might’ve passed the level threshold already. That giant firestorm she produced towards the end… pantheon, that was something.”

“I kind of wish I could’ve seen it. She must be blessed by Chakrata* or Lassan*.”

“Or Oandle*,” Marten said. “One of those. These elemental cultivators are always the flashiest ones, but even they need fundamentals. Don’t forget that. Now go over another hundred repetitions, while I have a little sit-down.”

Liam watched concerned as Marten shuffled over to one of the trees and slumped against it.

His eyes still had dark shades underneath him, and his movements were unnaturally unsure for him. He seemed weaker than Liam knew him.

It wasn’t that he had gotten hurt during the fight. Not overly much anyway. In fact, Liam suspected it was the same sort of sickness he had already observed during their first training back together.

Then he had chalked it up to a bad night of sleep or some wrong food, but now the man seemed to grow weaker by the day for over a week. Usually, cultivators at his stage were pretty immune to common colds, so whatever had befallen the man was a serious sickness.

After he was done, Liam brought the man some water.

“What do you think it is?”

Marten accepted the flask. “Some mana ailment probably. It will pass.”

“A mana ailment?” Liam raised an eyebrow. “That sounds serious.”

The man shrugged. “It’s pretty normal in low mana zones like this. I spent some time away in the western part of the empire. My body must’ve gotten used to the mana density over there and now have some trouble recalibrating.”

Liam didn’t comment on the fact that Marten had spent the last eight years in Blue’s employment on this side of the continent. Instead, he asked. “What do you do during the next monster attack?”

“Fight of course, what else should I do? We both know what happens if I suddenly don’t pull my weight anymore.”

People would die, Liam thought. Even if they had Katarina now, there was no telling when the next monster would come that would need more than just her and the others.

So far Marten had put on a facade amidst the rest of the caravan. He tried to still seem strong on the outside. He needed to.

Because as bad as it would be if he suddenly couldn’t help out in the attacks anymore. Things would be worse if Bilby suddenly caught wind of his weakened state.