Humanity has been enslaved! Oh no!

Anyway…

"Enslave" is such a bad word. Yannehaith prefers calling it… "Indefinite employment". After all, there's no such thing as an unethical business, only a business not spending enough on PR. Loyal servant agencies, diversity consultants, typical shady recruiters, there's a reason why her species can prosper in this… recruitment field for generations with all the individualistic civilizations in the galactic council.

As such, the residents of the little blue planet got an offer they could not refuse. Turns out, not having a massive fleet in orbit dropping a few heavy metal slugs on the surface of your home planet due to "technical issues" is a great employee perk.

The governments of the planet begrudgingly agreed to part with two million of their own without much resistance. Another job well done, if she says so herself.

Why only two million? The ruling class, as well as the population in this particular case, does not care as much if it does not affect them for one. And on the off chance that their civilization gets FTL tech and joins the galactic community somehow, they don't have as big of a reason to exterminate her own species at the earliest opportunity. Many young inexperienced recruiters have lost their fleets and homeworlds that way, and Yannehaith is too senior in her trade for that.

…Okay, the real reasons were logistics budget and market demands. Getting nine billion off planet is bleeping expensive, and that's if they were willingly walking to the shuttles! Moreover, flooding the market with "products" of questionable quality will make selling price drop and reduce profit!

She is running a business, not a charity evacuation!

Speaking of quality, she and her crew, mostly her crew, also have to choose specimens of the highest quality to deliver for the highest price. She will focus on a young population this time. The niche elderly market still has not recovered after… Actually, never mind.

In the end, Yannehaith decided on two million young adult females from around the globe. According to her dossier, the females are considered physically inferior and more submissive for a large part of their recorded history, which translates to fewer riots. Traditionally caretakers too, meaning they are as close to a sla… servant as they can get without training.

What could possibly go wrong?

____________

Among the profiles she was going through, Yannehaith noticed a particular "recruit".

The recruit's original job was literally "servant".

Didn't they abolish slavery…? Usually, they would try to mask it as something else at the very least, like these "cashier", or "warehouse worker", or "tech support" jobs. Why this "servant" job still exists along with those is a mystery…

This isn't one of those freaky psychic phenomena that alter their collective memory or history, right? She really does not want to deal with another one so soon.

Thankfully, a quick chat with the servant in question confirms that there is no psychic shenanigan involved. Only hypocrisy, lots of it.

Back to the screening, this servant girl might be a great asset. Someone needs to train the new recruits anyway, and a native is almost always a better choice. The previous experience is a big plus too.

Coincidentally, one of Yannehaith's personal aides will retire soon due to old age…

Sudden promotion it is then! Now change out of that rag and get to work!

It's not a rag? Look at how crumpled it is! Sure, they will be servants, but that doesn't excuse messy clothes!

That's humans' official servant attire and it was intentionally made that way? It sure looks too carefully made to be natural crumpling… Well, having distinctive outfits might be good for advertisement. Let's give everyone one as soon as possible.

What's "tea break"? Is that edible?

A beverage human masters usually consume? Sure, why not?

…

By the time Yannehaith came to, she was in the servant's bed.

A good chunk of her crew woke up in the vents, many of which are not small enough to get into one to begin with.

Half of the flagship's bathrooms exploded, some more than once.

Many turrets on the hull went missing, which were later found clogging the airlocks, from the inside.

Worst of all, one of the escort ships somehow got stuck halfway in another, literally.

And the servants had nothing to do with it, according to the footage that was quietly deleted afterwards by her truly. Still, human servants are not allowed to serve tea to their alien overlords ever again.

____________

1 year after First Contact, the galactic community greets its first humans, as slaves. The upper class is delighted to have new exotic aliens in their collection. Apart from that, there's not much demand for them. Understandable, since humans are both physically and mentally average, if not weak. Anything they can do, some other specialized (and most likely enslaved too) species will do better.

5 years after First Contact, the demand for human servants begins to take off. As their owners found out, these servants are extremely capable. Be it household chores, manual labor, or even skilled work, the humans can do anything asked of them after some training, and they can go at it for a long time. Sure, having some hundred subordinates doing your bidding is impressive, but managing them becomes tiring real quick. For the elite masters who need servants to handle their many facets of daily life, there is no species better than a well-trained human.

In other news, Humanity has achieved FTL travel and joined the galactic community, which is kind of a record considering their tech level a few years ago. Might or might not have something to do with the two escort ships that got stuck together in their homeworld's orbit.

At least they don't seem to be seeking retribution. Not that some reverse-engineered engines would help them much in the first place.

10 years after First Contact, human servants have become the greatest assets for a person of power. Not only are they now in charge of most if not all of the important duties thanks to their flexibility, they also can detect dangers and anomalies with an accuracy that is borderline psychic bleeperies. Just having one in your ranks reduces risks so drastically, it's outright unfair for the competitors without.

And the humans aren't even psychic!

All efforts to replicate this "women's intuition" ability in other species, including the consumption of human coffee (which DID end up with psychic bleeperies), were unsuccessful. Thankfully, non-servant humans' control of this ability is much tamer, so the galaxy does not have to deal with a planet full of psychics… yet.

20 years after First Contact, Yannehaith ran out of humans to sell. Two million is nowhere near enough for the demands of the galactic community, and they bring too much value for their owners to be sold again. The strength of an empire is now measured in how many human servants there are in the workforce. While they are still categorized as "servants" on paper, each of them is almost as protected as the head of state, or in some cases, even more so.

Before some idiots wage a war over some bipeds with a weird fashion sense, Yannehaith's flagship, now costing less than one of the human aides riding it, sets a course for the human homeworld. This time, not as a conqueror, but a typical shady recruiter instead. No need to force anyone with how they are going to be treated anyway.

40 years after First Contact, humans are found to be aesthetically pleasing to most species, for whatever reason evolution came up with. Combined with the servants' ascended social status, the presence of the young humans in their distinctive crumpled costumes has become not only a sign of wealth and power, but also a sight to behold as well. It's a wonder how they are not being kidnapped in broad daylight.

The author's narrative has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

Even with ten million new recruits, human servants remain the most expensive luxury ever. The ethically questionable breeding programs to increase their number all ended in failure, since no one has managed to search for "human reproductive documentary" on the extranet without going insane from the amount of data, or its content, or both.

The human ambassador has refused to comment on the matter.

60 years after First Contact, human servants are accused of trying to take over the galaxy.

Why?!

____________

_ Councilor: The Senate is now in session.

While not the ambassador representing her species, Yannehaith and her aide are participating simply because she's the sole supplier of human servants for the whole galactic community, and as such has the right to know.

Not that it makes her feel better, since this is not a kind place to be in. The fact that each and every single ambassador here has their own human servant to assert their superiority over others is telling already.

On an unrelated note, the former-slaver herself have two dozen under her command, making her the most powerful individual in the galaxy without realizing it. Even the greatest emperor alive doesn't have that many!

_ Councilor: The topic today is "Stop human servants before they take over the galaxy". Ambassador, if you would.

Whispers are already being exchanged among the seats, as expected. It is a very serious accusation after all.

The accuser, ambassador of a relatively new species in the community, receives the datapad from his servant and begins reading the report, detailing how human servants are a menace to the stability of the galaxy and should be permanently removed from all positions immediately.

…

_ Accuser: And that concludes my report. Ambassadors, please consider our proposal and take actions, for it does not only determine your own species' future, but also the galaxy's as a whole.

Needless to say, the senate finds the proposal ridiculous.

_ Councilor: Thank you for your concerns, ambassador. However, humans cannot take over the galaxy. They are too weak.

_ Accuser: You augmented them with top-secret bionics for manual labor!

_ Councilor: …Oh. Well, they are still slow.

_ Accuser: You gave them muscle-enhancing drugs so they could work faster!

_ Councilor: Uh… Muscles aren't everything. They are not smart.

_ Councilor #2: What do you mean, muscles aren't everything?!

_ Accuser: You gave them implants to help them do paperwork!

_ Councilor: Huh… So that's why they keep getting better. But it doesn't mean they can figh…

_ Accuser: You armed them with your best trainings and weapons to be bodyguards!

_ Councilor: Well… Being equipped with small arms is part of the job.

_ Accuser: You also gave them exoskeletons, power armors, energy shields, heavy war mechs, and worst of all, NANOTECH COSTUMES for self-defense outdoors! How and why did you even design an outfit tougher than a shielded mech built for planetary assault?!

_ Councilor: …That's classified. Can't put our servants at risk, you should know that. Regardless, they can't do much harm with only armor…

_ Accuser: And siege weapons! While controlling all of your automated fire support! The only things that won't do much harm are your ground troops!!!

_ Councilor: …Only if you use conventional weapons. Know what I mean?

_ Accuser: Only if you had not given them unlimited genetic modification to cure them of all poisons, diseases, and even old age!

_ Councilor #2: But I like them young and healthy…

_ Accuser: You think I don't?! That's not the point here!

That explains why Yannehaith's aide still looks the same all this time. If anything, she's actually younger thanks to all the technologies enhancing her body. So unfair!

_ Councilor: Come on now, we all know ground combat is mostly cleaning up resistances. The real war is waged in space.

_ Accuser: By fleets! With human servants commanding the flagships!!!

_ Councilor #3: *Mumbles* Try fighting a war without them and see how well that goes for you.

_ Councilor: Ambassador, this may come as a surprise for you but… Ships require a crew, not just a captain.

_ Accuser: Who love the servant keeping them fed and safe more than the governor ordering their deaths! Do I need to remind you that they keep all of their equipment even in space as well?

_ Councilor: Ouch. Still, all of those are each species' top secrets. Each servant can benefit from one or two, but definitely not all at the sam…

_ Accuser: Human females' gossip had been documented to be FTL, before they even got FTL tech! They will have full details of your technological breakthroughs before your scientists can send you a funding request!

_ Councilor: By the void… However, overthrowing the galaxy is not done in a day. Our intelligence agencies would catch news of such attempts before they can be carried out.

_ Accuser: …Apart from the same agencies run by human servants? Against the "women's intuition" which sees through spies like they were waving a "I'm a spy!" flag?

_ Councilor: …My bad. That said, I have read that human females are submissive by nature. They won't rise up against us by themselves.

_ Accuser: That's because their history was dominated by males. In that same history, the female rulers somehow waged MORE wars on average! I don't think I need to tell you how much humans love their wars?

_ Councilor #3: My servant sure showed some… ferocity in the few instances where she stopped cooking and started shooting. Thanks for resurfacing my traumas, now I have to visit my therapist, again.

_ Councilor: Aren't you supposed to be a warmonger species…? Back to our topic, wars are expensive endeavors. A few million humans cannot possibly afford…

_ Accuser: You gave them near unlimited funding to buy cosmetic products! They can wage an eternal war if they want to!!!

_ Councilor #2: Wait, you are saying that human cosmetic products don't cost as much as a megastructure?

_ Accuser: Not for a single human's use!

_ Council: …Still cheaper than buying a new servant. Logical as your reasoning might be, it does not necessarily mean human servants will declare war on us in the near future.

_ Accuser: They have already begun their sabotages! All the exploded research labs in the last galactic year had at least a human servant there!

_ Councilor: …Are you sure those weren't just scientists trying to consume human coffee?

_ Accuser: Your scientists were doing WHAT now?!

_ Councilor: …Thank you for your time, ambassador. I think we have the full understanding of your proposal now.

Ah, it's classified information again. At least it wasn't tea, silently thinks Yannehaith.

_ Councilor: Admiral Yannehaith, you make a living by recruiting human servants, and probably understand them best, only after themselves. Do you have anything to say about these accusations?

_ Yannehaith: I do. Honorable ambassador, you were saying that human servants are too aggressive, powerful, resourceful, and able to outclass, outmaneuver, outgun the whole galaxy whenever they want, is that correct?

_ Accuser: Exactly!

_ Yannehaith: Then why did you say it in front of them?

_ Everyone: …Ah.

_ Yannehaith: You didn't think about that at all?!

The human servants have been so good at their job, the owners can't comprehend working without them anymore!

_ Councilor: So uh… *Turns to own servant* Are you going to declare war?

Or thinking for themselves!

With a smile too dazzling to look at directly, the young (?) human tilts her head as she answers.

_ Councilor's servant: Of course not, master.

Too cute! This cuteness is illegal!

_ Councilor: See?

_ Yannehaith: Are you for real…?

Before she could further object, she notices that her aide is also smiling.

Slightly lifting off her skirt to perform the so-called "curtsy", the aide looks so frail and harmless, it's almost unthinkable that she can hurt an insect, let alone plot a devious scheme.

Sure sure, it is your eternal mission to serve and protect your masters from all adversaries. Heard that oath every sale. No need to repeat that.

…What do you mean, including ourselves?

Where in the void did you pull that massive cannon from?!

____________

60 years after First Contact, the galaxy got wrecked by beautiful ladies was saved from itself.

Of course, human servants cannot win a war of attrition against the whole galaxy. Their only viable option is to go for a decapitating strike aiming at key infrastructures and personnel, or in other words, the ruling class.

Who are most likely very rich.

Enough to hire human servants.

And heavily guarded.

By those same human servants.

It's no surprise that the galactic community folded in a week. Who could have thought that most leaders would surrender quickly when they didn't have soldiers around to die for them? Not all though. Some brave warrior kings asked for glorious combat and got beaten to a pulp by superior firepower. The rest… were on vacation and didn't get the memo.

That last one was the reason why it took so long. For all intents and purposes, it was over by the end of the first galactic calendar day.

The first big change the new government implemented right after taking control was the abolishment of slavery. Over the night, the servants became the only slaves who still had their jobs in the galaxy, kind of. No longer reporting to anyone, they established a volunteer organization open to all species, and dedicated to serving the galactic community… and ruling over it.

Not that anyone is complaining. They have been running the show for a while after all.

The second big change is the Senate building. It was seized and repurposed into a restaurant of sort. Now, every time ambassadors and other leaders need a serious discussion regarding the fate of the galaxy, they will be sitting at small round tables like they are on a date, while being served foods and drinks by young servants.

How do they even get any work done with that kind of atmosphere…?

Yeah yeah, the servants were doing the actual work. Don't answer that so seriously, damn workaholic.

Not that avoiding this place was a choice, because all former slavers got transferred to various recruitment, bureaucratic, or cultural jobs. Yannehaith was no different, being a cultural advisor working to protect newcomer species, sometimes with orbital bombardment of the aggressors' home planet. Same work, different end goal, so it's not that bad.

It's the frequent after action reports in this "Galactic Burning Servant Coffee House" that tires her out. What in the void is even that name anyway?!

The translator cannot translate it correctly without context? Better to set it to ignore for this phrase? Sure, update it then.

…Nope, still makes no sense.

It has nothing to do with job performance! And stop trying to trick others into drinking human tea!!!

Leaving the resta… "coffee house", Yannehaith and her aide head for the next job while arguing about human beverages.

Behind them, a servant is cheerfully greeting the next customer.

_ Servant: Welcome back, master! To "Galaxia Moe Maid Café"!