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Chapter 5: The truth about myself

After my first experience of trying to talk, or rather, just trying and failing to go over the ABCs due to my underdeveloped newborn brain, I made several more such attempts. However, I continued to only practice at night, when even these two were asleep. I didn’t know very much about my, or rather, our situation. And, due to the fact that they were apparently supposed to be my food source, that made me rather nervous about how my parents or other members of my own race might react to these two saying something careless if they caught on to me being from the same previous life as them.

At the very least, I wanted to have the ability to say the words “don’t tell anybody” before I tried to talk to them. I would likely say something sooner if they start to show obvious signs of becoming weaker because of me, but until one of those two things happened I kept my training to when the two of them were asleep. That’s not to say I did nothing during the day though. While I couldn’t go to the extent of anything obvious like practicing English words or the ABCs, but I could at least become more vocal. After all, I was only just now developing the motor speech center of my brain, so any conscious attempt to move my mouth to make noises other than “aaa” would help.

(She’s making a lot of noise now, isn’t she?) The boys of course noticed this. Since I have gotten my eyesight, I managed to confirm they were indeed boys. It’s kinda hard not to notice when they are only around a year old and I’m with them literally 24/7, or however they keep track of time in this world. Clearly, since frightening creatures like me who feed on children exist in this world, it can’t possibly be earth where we are.

(Well, at least she’s not crying anymore,) Rolwen says, holding my sister. I look across at her from my place in Levin’s arms, studying her face. She’s also looking back at me, looking like she’s slightly out of it. When I see her, I realize exactly why it is that they were so afraid about us back when I started crying before.

As I look at my sister, her face is an ashen pale color. As a nurse in my former life, I have seen that skin tone before, normally on people who have died of asphyxiation. Did something go wrong while we were being born perhaps? To see that skin color on a baby this young, it can only mean that their lungs are not functioning properly in some way.

But, no. That would be if we had a normal human physiology. Well, I do find that I breathe like a normal human does at least, despite the manner in which I eat being an incredibly alien thing to anything that would exist on Earth. This leaves me with two possible scenarios then. Either, one, our species is one where our skin will also begin to turn pale ashen grey when we are malnourished and the adults are doing exactly the correct thing to treat our condition. Or, two, the medical science of this world is not advanced enough to realize that the problem is her lungs.

Well, there is probably one way to settle this for sure. I have been practicing to talk for a while now, and was crying at the top of my lungs for days at a time before that. If I’m able to do something like that, there’s no way I have any kind of problem with my own lungs. So, I’m going to need to somehow take a look at my own face, or at least my hand or something.

This poses to be rather difficult though. Along with not eating normally, the excretion functions of this new body are also not normal. In fact, it is not an issue that even comes up at all. So, with no reason to ever unwrap me from this tight blanket they have wrapped around me, I often go over a day without even being unwrapped once. I cannot see any part of my own body with only my face poking out.

Well, it would sorta make some sense for a newborn of a species like this. We’re at an age where we wouldn’t be able to properly regulate our body temperature and wouldn’t be able to lift our own heads either. As such, these tightly wrapped blankets likely help to solve both issues at once.

(Are you feeling better Gaerien?) Levin asks, the one problem with his question being that it was directed at me while he was using my sister’s name. Well, that issue aside, with the tone of his voice I can discern a few things at least. One of those things is I likely am seeming a lot healthier than I was when everyone started worrying about me.

(She seems better, but her face is still pretty pale isn’t it?) Rolwen comes in, giving me the exact information I wanted to hear. (Ah! Looks like she’s happy to hear that!) Was my expression that obvious? Well, an infant also doesn’t have a well developed frontal cortex or inhibitory center in their brain, so I suppose any emotion I happen to have will automatically and immediately appear on my face with no space for me to interrupt it.

Well then, that gives me exactly the information I wanted to hear. So, obviously the pale color of my skin about matches Gaerien’s skin. I look back across to my sister with some concern in my eyes. So, is that pale appearance about malnutrition after all?

“Ll' en' lle, endenmul” The woman who seems to be the caretaker for all the children here calls out. I’ve learned after hearing this phrase a few times now, and watching the reaction of the children, this has something to do with food. Of course, while I may not need food, they all still seem to be very much human and have been eating normal meals this whole time.

Suddenly, my ability to focus on my thoughts is interrupt as there is a clamor of activity with all the children rushing to the table. That is, all the children except Rolwen and Levin, along with the two of us. They remain sitting on the floor cradling Gaerien and I. While the other kids have to come get their food, it has become the pattern that for Rolwen and Levin, the food gets brought to them.

It is at about this time that I notice there is someone new who I haven’t seen before in here. Normally, it’s the woman who seems to be the caretaker here who sees to all the kids, a woman who appears to be in her mid 30s with brown hair who is always busily going from one child to another to keep them in line. However, now there is someone else.

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Unlike our usual caretaker who has a relaxed posture, if not slightly hunched from always looking down at the children she’s constantly tending to, this individual has a tall and erect posture. It is not quite that of a military air, but it is clearly a very refined and proud manner with which they walk slowly through the room filled with children’s toys and scampering kids. However, when each child notices this new person, they all give a wide clearance as though they want to avoid getting in their way, all with a silent almost suppressed feel to their actions as the few younger children who are making noises, squirming, and acting up are quickly silenced by the older children.

Just watching the unusual behavior from the other children as though fearing the consequences of annoying this person while they direct repeated strange gazes toward them, I very quickly realize there is something about this person that’s taken very seriously by all of them, and my brain is very quickly beginning to form various theories.

This person seems to be holding a plate full of food. And, as soon as all the other children are sitting at the table, they pay the other children no more mind and begin looking directly at the four of us. This person walks straight to us, keeping that dignified air and perfect posture the entire time, kneeling down when they reach the point where Levin and Rolwen are sitting on the floor with my sister and I in their laps.

I get a closer look at this person’s face. I wasn’t certain whether they were male or female all this time due to the long and rather well-kept hair they wore down their back. What’s more, their clothes seemed to be a flowing robe draped over their entire form, giving little obvious hint as to their gender. However, getting a closer look, the face does seem rather masculine. But, there’s something else that seems a little off about them, but I can’t quite seem to place it.

“Lle atta en' sana caela malia quel i' ai laito.” A gentle masculine voice, comes from the person in front of us. Well, I certainly have to conclude he’s probably a man then. “Sii' ta naa coiasira ten' sen mat- en' i' palurin.” He takes a look from Rolwen to Levin and then directs a gentle smile at me, placing a hand down on top of my head and rubbing gently.

“Sen helma naa il-quel sal'. Amin estela sina alya-sen natul-eithel.” After saying more things in a language I can’t understand with a slight drop in his face and tone of voice that makes it sound like he’s saying something serious, the man picks up what looks like a small berry and crushes it between his fingers. After getting the berry juice on his finger and discarding the skin, he reaches down and forces his finger into my mouth.

Reflex automatically takes over at this point and I naturally start trying to resist him. Meanwhile, my tongue begins attempting to force his finger out with the natural infant’s extrusion reflex. However, he keeps a firm hold on my head, and seems to make a point of rubbing his berry-juice covered finger all over my tongue. The flavor of the berry spreads over my tongue and through my mouth, and eventually the man seems satisfied.

“Naa sai-quel sai-quel, tanya nae quel.” He says quickly in what sounds like the apologetic and encouraging tone one might use after giving a child a shot. In fact, was that? Did he just give me some kind of medicine?

I try to blink the tears out of my eyes in order to get a better look at him now. Is he, maybe, some kind of doctor here? Judging by the dynamics of what’s being going on so far, if this guy is a doctor then the chances are fairly good he’s the same race that I am. This means that if I want to understand my world and what I am, I should probably try to get a good look at this guy.

It’s incredibly frustrating, having my hands pinned down by the blanket and being unable to move my head. I have no good way to wipe the misty tears from my eyes resulting from getting a finger suddenly jammed in my mouth. I keep blinking my eyes furiously, hoping to dislodge some of the tears so I can get a good look. Through my blurred vision, I do manage to just barely make something out while his head is turned to the side, apparently repeating the same process with Gaerien that he just did with me.

‘That’s what was weird!’ It was not so obvious looking at him from straight-on in front, but as soon as I saw this guy from the side I knew immediately what the strange thing about his face was. ‘His ears!’ His ears were not quite shaped the same as a human’s ears. It was slight, but the auricle of his ear came to a point in the back, and this caused it to also turn slightly forward and seem to protrude a little farther from his head rather than laying back flat against the head. At the same time, there also seemed to be a little more material on the front end of the ear. This structure, it seemed to be almost optimized to catch sounds coming both from in front and also in back.

I continued to take in the distinctive and seeming highly efficient shape of the man’s ear, almost shaped like a strange cup missing part of its side, as he finished giving Gaerien the same stuff he had just given me. “San’” He made a satisfied sounding expression as he stood up. Gaerien had not made nearly as much of a fuss as I had, and so he didn’t seem to see a need to say something soothing to her. “Ve' lle eden’ta amin estela lle uma. Sai-quel malia en' i' he` laito lle sana.” After saying these words with a satisfied smile, the man turned and left, briefly saying a few words to the woman taking care of the children before he goes out the door.

After this, I am left to ponder what I had just seen. Those ears. While they did have a little bit of extra material, ultimately making them look far more functional than the image that existed back on Earth, didn’t those ears have essentially the same basic pointed shape of what we called Elves? Also, aside from the ears, everything else about him perfectly fit the image of an elf.

As I have these thoughts in mind, I am also struck by another thought. It wasn’t so popularly portrayed in the time that I died in my previous life, but if you go back to the very origins of the tales about Elves, they were very far from the friendly creatures that helped Santa Clause, or even the more ancient forest warrior race that worked for the benefit of all races against a grand threat in Middle Earth while helping some Hobbits. No, they were nothing like that. In fact, they were a creature of fear for all the people of the time that their story was first told.

Of particular note, Elves were said to abduct and, in some stories, even kill children. There were even tales where the presence of an elf would cause a child to die while being tightly held in their father’s arms as he tried to protect his son. Nothing would matter if an elf set their eyes on a child.

In most of the stories, the elf just lured in the child with music an promises of a fun life where they could play all day if they came along and ran away from their parents. However, there were none of the ancient stories in which it was ever clearly said what the elves actually did with the children after they got to the elven home.

Well, it was not entirely the case that you never heard what happens in the elven home-land. It’s just that you never heard the fate of the children. For adults, however, they often get lured by elves as well. In the case of adults, they will often invite the adults to have a meal with them. However, as soon as the adult eats something that the elf offers to them, they become unable to ever leave the elven lands or return home to their family.

There are several stories about elves, but among the most ancient stories, there is always one thing in common. That is that elves seem to have a very very big thing with kidnapping people, and there also seems to be a particular interest in children.

So, if that’s the case and these really are the same elves from the oldest fairy tales, would this be the reason why they have such a thing for kidnapping children? To feed their own children? Well, at any rate, even more things are lining up now. With so many things similar to the old stories, I now have quite a bit to go on in figuring out what’s going on, or at least developing a reasonable expectation.

I should avoid thinking that this is all exactly like the old Earth fairy tales. Clearly it’s not at all like the modern portrayal of Elves, so why should it be perfectly identical to the oldest stories as well? Still, from what I can see so far, the oldest stories have more in common with these Elves than the modern portrayal.

At any rate, this does not change my short term plans in the slightest. Well, my only plans for that matter. I still have to get myself to a point I’m able to talk, and I have to ask these two how they are feeling while also warning them not to talk to anyone about me being able to communicate with them. At least, not until I can find out a little more about the temperament of the elves and their intentions toward these children.