My sleep was restful until just before I awoke. I felt myself slipping into the cold, waking nightmare of the void. Then, warmth and light flooded in: black nothingness replaced by black stone.
Though, I could still feel the shadows. Ever watching. Ever waiting. Ever ready.
“Of course I do not think less of you for having slept only rarely in beds! I think that’s a terrible tragedy, sister,” Ssiina’s somewhat shrill voice was the first I heard as I opened my eyes, stirring and pulling myself up from the pile I’d fallen into in my sleep.
“Be careful how much you complain then!” Kyrae retorted. “This room was nice and warm and dry!”
“…And hard,” I mumbled, stretching out with a jaw-popping yawn.
Their conversation stopped.
“We weren’t arguing,” Ssiina said with odd conviction.
“How did you sleep?” Kyrae asked, ignoring our hssen-raised sister.
I opened my mouth to complain about how my lower body felt, but shut it. “Fine. I felt the void right at the end, but I had normal sleep otherwise—although I do wish we’d slept in a bed.”
“Quite,” Ssiina agreed, smiling widely for some reason. “I’m surprised they let us sleep here, but I suppose your condition and our situation warrants bending the rules.”
I yawned again. “Rules?”
Ssiina opened her mouth.
“Actually, don’t answer that,” I said quickly. “When can we eat?”
“Soon, hopefully,” Kyrae answered, tilting her head. “I think someone’s in the other room.”
“Antechamber,” Ssiina clarified.
Kyrae glared at her.
Ssiina put her hands near the top of her lower body. “Do you want me to help teach you terms, or not?”
My sister sighed. “Fine. Issa?”
“Me? Oh, uh, yeah. Ant chamber or whatever.” I waved a hand and continued my stretch. “Whatever gets me food.”
“How are you that hungry?” Ssiina asked, the larger-for-now lamia looking over me skeptically.
“Still growing?” I offered. “I dunno. But I could eat a whole swarm of water rats.”
Ssiina paled. “They—they swarm?”
“Oh yeah. Like a rushing river of wet fur and dull teeth.”
Ssiina shivered. “Are you certain you are alright, sister? You weren’t so… spirited, yesterday.”
“Yesterday, I’d just woken up from dying and had a bunch of powerful people breathin’ down my throat. Today I got sleep and have a chance at a bunch of free food. Not turnin’ that down.”
“Issa,” Ssiina chastised. “You won’t have to worry about food ever again.”
“You say that, but—”
“But nothing!” Ssiina interrupted suddenly, her voice shriller than usual. “We are not going to abandon you. No matter what you say or do, you are family found again and I am going to make sure you are not lost. Sire is too—you saw her yesterday!”
Yesterday. Already, fresh as it was, it felt like a dream. A turbulent tide of emotions, riding out in front of what might have been a storm. What might still be.
I didn’t really want to put too much stock in all this being real.
I looked at Ssiina again; she was starting to cry.
Maybe it was real.
“Ssiina, I’m…” I paused, but neither she nor Kyrae cut me off. “I’m sorry. I just… it’s hard…”
Ssiina’s eyes cast down. “I’m sorry—and I mean this in the sincerest possible way—I’m sorry it’s hard for you to believe all this is happening. That all the awful stuff you’ve lived through has made you feel that way.”
I winced. But I didn’t snap at her.
Kyrae gave Ssiina a sharp look. “If you’re sorry about that, keep being our sister and don’t pity us.”
Ssiina nodded. “Yes, sister.”
“…Can we just go find food?” I asked, feeling hunger again almost as strong as when I’d woken up the day prior.
My sisters nodded, and together we left for the antechamber, Ssiina complaining about a lack of fresh clothes. I didn’t get it: ours were plenty fresh still.
Dyni was awake in the… whatever Ssiina had called this room-before-a-more-important-room, and she gave us a small nod. Asleep in the room was Ssyri’zh Onussa, her head in her arms as she snored softly.
The three of us paused. Do we wake her?
Ssiina seemed to think so, slithering forward just as Onussa mumbled something and began to stir. Eyes still closed, she stretched and yawned wide, fangs popping down briefly before she realized we were all staring at her.
The small lania’el flushed darker. “I… you’re awake! My apologies, I was just napping—I didn’t mean to—”
“When had you last slept?” Kyrae asked.
“Oh.” Onussa rubbed at the back of her head as she straightened the kinks out of her lower body, scales sliding on stone underneath her. “Well, I suppose it was the night before you brought Issa to the temple.”
How long was that? Days—had to be. She stayed up for days, and even came back after Ussyri Noksi had her leave for other duties?
The ssyri’zh laughed nervously under Kyrae’s glare. “I’m fine—really! I suppose you all are hungry?”
The way she said it made me think we weren’t the only ones. Regardless, however, we all assented.
“Are you okay to wait here?” Onussa asked as if she knew the answer would be no.
“I’m fine to wait,” I answered, surprising myself. I tried to continue, to explain why, but I didn’t know why.
“Oh.” Onussa looked at my sisters.
“I suppose this room is adequate. And it would be best were I not seen cavorting with an ‘unknown’ lamia and ea,” Ssiina added.
“I don’t mind waiting if Issa doesn’t,” Kyrae agreed.
A surprised Onussa nodded. “A-alright then! I’ll go get us—you—something to eat.” She inclined her head to Dyni who, after a moment, nodded. “I’m glad to see you three getting along so well,” the ssyri’zh finished with a smile.
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She left while humming to herself. Why does today feel so… different?
***
The whole week felt different. Even after Ssiina had to go home with Dyni. After Sire Tyaniis visited and apologized again for her servants’ treatment of Kyrae and me.
Speaking of Kyrae, she even got her herbs, in the form of a tea and with a near-promise of magic in the future to finish things off. I didn’t notice any immediate changes, but Kyrae and Ssiina both had laughed at my skepticism. My elf sister was confident me she already felt better.
To be honest, I did too.
Ra’zhii.
I wasn’t a freak. Not that I would’ve been otherwise, the others assured me, but I guess I finally believed it myself. Mostly. Still couldn’t believe I’d get my own boobs, or that they were growing in so late. Ssiina blamed it on a lack of food—which I’d been working hard to remedy while I still could.
Though the ‘while I still could’ voice was getting quieter and quieter.
The void as well was distant, although I did receive another visit from Ussyri Noksi to check on me. She seemed pleased I hadn’t used my powers. Really, I did miss parts of them—the feeling of power they gave me.
Would that I could control that power.
Perhaps this Phaeliisthia, whatever she was, could help me. Only time would tell.
Before we left for Uzh, a trip I was increasingly accepting as reality, Kyrae and I were also fitted for clothing by a stern man with a long string and cold hands. We were going to get clothing, made just for us!
At the end of a week-long blur of food and warmth, Kyrae and I were called again into the room where we met our sire. This time, I didn’t enter scared. I slithered in confidently and coiled next to Sire Tyaniis and my sisters Ssiina and Kyrae, both across from Ussyri Noksi.
The ussyri wore an expression I couldn’t understand, and she spoke first once Dyni closed the door. “Phael has informed me she will help. She expects Issa, Kyrae, and Ssiina in Uzh in two weeks.”
“Why the cold face then?” Sire Tyaniis asked with a hint of venom.
Ussyri Noksi sighed. “She insisted that I drop what I am doing and go with you to visit for the day. ‘Have tea,’ she said.”
I stifled a giggle and earned a glare from the ussyri. I haven’t met Phaeliisthia, but if she can make Ussyri Noksi flustered, I think I like her already.
“You certainly seem in better spirits, Issa,” Ussyri Noksi said with an edge to her voice.
“I do!” I replied brightly.
The ussyri nodded, then sighed. “I can have a ship ready by tomorrow if—”
“No need,” Sire Tyaniis interrupted with a wave of her hand. “My ship is ready to go right now. We need only board it.”
Right now. “Possible” immediately became “real.”
But… I didn’t have a reason to stay. Except Ssyri’zh Onussa.
“Will we get to say goodbye to Onussa?” I asked.
“Of course,” Ussyri Noksi replied.
“You’ll also be able to visit: here or elsewhere,” my sire added.
Good. Why did that make me feel good? I’ve barely known Onussa for a week.
I glanced down at Kyrae to see her smiling up at me, fresh-washed and looking brighter than she had in months. That’s why.
“Sire, if I may,” Ssiina started and Tyaniis gave her a nod to continued. “May I take some time to prepare?”
“Prepare what?”
“Well, clothing and other necessary items for one thing. A living space on the ship for another and—”
“Daughter mine,” Sire Tyaniis cut Ssiina off, “you have enough already on the ship, and on your back. Uzh and Phaeliisthia will have more than whatever else you need.”
Ssiina looked like she was about to protest.
“Or,” Tyaniis continued slyly, “Is it that you think you need more than your sisters?”
That stopped Ssiina cold, and I barely hid a smile at how fast she went from pleading to conciliatory. “No Sire! It’s just… no, it’s fine. It’s fine isn’t it.” Suddenly, my hssen-raised sister seemed to take pause at something. She looked almost nervous.
“We’ll be sure to take good care of you, sister!” Kyrae added.
Ssiina gave an odd expression, but nodded. “Of course, sister.”
Is Ssiina afraid of losing whatever luxuries the palace has? Is that it?
I didn’t get a chance to ask, as Sire Tyaniis and Ussyri Noksi once again took control of the conversation, discussing logistics.
Only when they were done, did one of us sisters speak again.
And it was Kyrae. “How long will we be staying in Uzh, Sire Tyaniis?”
Tyaniis smiled. “However long it takes for you both to learn what you need to know of our world and to navigate the politics of hssen and ussen. I expect Phaeliisthia will also take you on as a student of magic, Kyrae, and you may also learn more of your own curse-granted powers, Issa.”
“I’m gonna have to learn a lot of glyphs aren’t I?” I asked hesitantly. But I might also be able to use my powers?
The shadows in the room twitched.
“All of them,” Sire Tyaniis answered easily.
All of them? The shadows in the room twitched again, for an entirely different reason.
“H-how long?” I asked again.
“Not too long,” Sire Tyaniis answered. “I expect only two or three years. Five at the most.”
Five years?
“If Phael will have them for that long,” Ussyri Noksi added.
I glanced around at everyone. Ssiina’s own wide yellow eyes met mine. She mouthed “five years” at me and I blinked rapidly. Beside me, Kyrae was remarkably calm.
“Kyrae,” I hissed quietly. “Five years!?”
“Sire Tyaniis said we can visit, Issa. And I’d bet it’ll be a nice place to live.”
“What if we don’t like it?”
Kyrae shrugged. “What do you think?”
I looked up at the two older women, suddenly reminded of how very scary they were. “Uhm, if we don’t like it there…” My bravado was gone in an instant.
“If,” Sire Tyaniis started, “that happens, then we will make a decision.”
I shook my head.
“Issa,” Sire Tyaniis warned.
I shook my head again, harder.
Sire Tyaniis sighed. “Would you feel better if I went with you to Uzh and stayed a while? We can figure something else out if you or Kyrae are not comfortable there.”
I didn’t miss that she left Ssiina out of this. Still, I nodded rapidly, surprising myself yet again. I shouldn’t be risking this. What if… I couldn’t finish the thought.
Meanwhile, Ussyri Noksi sputtered. “Hssen Tyaniis, surely you cannot simply—”
“I have already informed my retainers, servants, and my sister, Ussyri Noksi. They are well prepared for me to take a spiritual trip to the Holy City.”
Did she…
Ussyri Noksi laughed haltingly. “Of course. Well then, Hssen Tyaniis, this is shaping up to be quite the interesting trip. How do you plan to ensure attention is not drawn to our entourage.”
“Dyni,” Sire Tyaniis said simply.
The ever-quiet bodyguard brought out a pack and opened it, revealing old, stained cloaks within.
Ussyri Noksi frowned. “Hssen Tyaniis, surely you cannot mean to—”
“Why not?” my sire demanded. “If it is good enough for my daughter, it is good enough for me. Besides, we can travel in different groups at different times, and I’m certain the people I have in place will be more than adequate to watch the streets and ward the alleys.”
“By Jaezotl, you’re serious, aren’t you?” Ussyri Noksi said with wide eyes.
Tyaniis nodded with a knowing smile. “It really brings me back to my youth, Ussyri.”
“But you didn’t—”
“I didn’t get caught, Ussyri Noksi,” Sire Tyaniis smiled widely.
I looked between her and the nervous Ssiina, seeing almost the same thing.
“Those two are a lot more similar than they want to admit,” Kyrae whispered into my ear.
“It’s kinda cute,” I shot back, surprising myself and immediately very glad no one else seemed to have heard me.
Ussyri Noksi put the fingers of one hand on her forehead. “Fine, Hssen Tyaniis. Given that we should leave today, and knowing your reputation for both stubbornness and reliability, I will go along with your plan.”
“Excellent!” Hssen Tyaniis clapped her hands together.
Ssiina peeked into the bag and paled, but didn’t speak. Kyrae and I simply exchanged knowing looks.
***
Before we left the temple, while the others were getting ready and Kyrae and I had our cloaks—which were still far too nice for what they were imitating, but they’d work at a distance—we said goodbye for now to Ssyri’zh Onussa.
“I’m surprised at Hssen Tyaniis’s plan,” Onussa said with a giggle. “But it sounds fun, doesn’t it?”
Really, I liked my sire’s plan. The old cloaks seemed comfortable and the anonymity more so.
“It does!” I agreed. “We wanted to say goodbye and…”
“…Thank you, Onussa,” Kyrae finished for me. “For saving Issa—and me—and for staying with us and helping us way beyond what either of us expected.”
Onussa blushed. “O-of course. Any self-respecting ssyri’ssen would have done the same thing.”
“No,” I shook my head, thinking back to our other experiences. “They wouldn’t have. Thank you, Onussa…” I let her name trail off. “Would… are we friends?”
The ssyri’zh’s smile grew wider. “Of course we’re friends, Issa! You and Kyrae!”
“Thanks, Onussa,” I responded.
The ssyri’zh leaned forward and hugged me and Kyrae both. I stiffened, then melted into her warm embrace, eyes growing wet.
“Thank you for helping her to trust again,” Kyrae whispered loud enough for me to hear.
Onussa nodded into my shoulder.
When we broke apart, she wore a sad smile. “You’ll be away from Ess’Sylantziis for a while, won’t you two.”
I nodded. “Five years.”
“Up to five years,” Kyrae clarified. “And we’ll be sure to come visit, right Issa?”
“Right! And when we do, we’ll go out to the nicest places in the city because we can!”
“Thank you, you two,” Onussa replied, her own eyes wet. “It feels like it’s been a lot longer than ten days.”
I nodded again. It really has.
“You two should finish getting ready and head out. From what little I know of Phaeliisthia, she hates being kept waiting. Her and Ussyri Noksi and Hssen Tyaniis—all three of them.”
“Yeah,” I choked a little. “That sounds like Sire Tyaniis.”
We said our final goodbyes to Onussa and slipped our cloaks on, rendezvousing with Dyni before leaving the Grand Temple to head to the docks on the Greatriver side of Ess’Sylantziis. Sire Tyaniis’s ship was docked there to make its presence less suspicious.
I was relieved she thought of something like that. Still, though, anyone looking too hard at our cloaks would see not only someone wearing unusually heavy clothing, but someone wearing rather nice fabric.
One thing about the cloaks was true, however: the familiar, comfortable sense of anonymity. But, as we descended from the Grand Temple onto the busy street, I almost wanted to throw mine off.