Chapter 0 – Welcome New Hero
“Welcome to Sauropod Station, is there anything else you need today?”
Next customer
“Welcome to Sauropod Station, is there anything else you need today?”
Next customer
“Welcome to Sauropod Station, is there anything else you need today?”
This is my entire day. It is a lot like a trained monkey. I’m sure if you give a monkey a sign they could literally be taught how to swipe a credit card. In fact why do they need some idiot to do this? If this was put outside or you get a robot to scan bar codes then boom no job. But you might ask well what about the outside? No that’s trash work too. It wouldn’t take much to automate that either. During the day they set the thermostat down in the 60’s for the station. But I’ve learned how to use a coffee stir stick and tap the button to raise the temp into low 70’s. 74 is much more to my comfort zone than 62 degrees. I’d swear they want the inside to be like the coolers in back. My coworker doesn’t stock the fridge but waits for the crowd to die down then has me “finish” his work. Yea this is like when I had to restock the fountain soda and walked in the back room to find him head down sleeping. Uh huh.. yea he was just looking for something. I’d believe that if he could only see to the end of his nose. When people have a bad day they come in here and scream at me over life. HOW exactly am I their councilor?
Day after day passes like this getting minimum wage ish. When I’m working for $7.50 an hour and I’m nearly 30 then I know this is truly what they call a dead end job. I get home, shower, and relax but unless I can save the cash for a 2 year degree or something how am I going to get a better job. This is exactly how it was until that day when everything changed.
Something happened and a wave struck the world. Some called it cosmic rays. Some said it was tectonic shift. Others said hell bled over into our world and the devils minions are getting those that deserve eternal torment and punishment. Some said it was what happened when a partical accelerator was turned on full and overloaded, and the result is the explosion here. Ask me and I’ll just tell you I have no idea what in the world it was, nor where it came from. But it fucked up and already screwed up society.
WOOSH!!! Congratulations Hero, you are recognized as a Warrior! Lights and fan fair.
WOOSH!!! Congratulations Hero, you are recognized as an Archer! Lights and fan fair.
WOOSH!!! Congratulations Hero, you are recognized as a Wizard! Lights and fan fair.
WOOSH!!! Congratulations Hero, you are recognized as a Cleric! Lights and fan fair.
What’s the meaning of this? I’ll be happy to enlighten you from my point of view. This means one wanker who has more muscle than he has brains was recognized for this. Now he’s greatly desired by various groups, he kills monster that free roam the world, and they do dungeon attacks to keep dungeons from overflowing. The Archer no matter if they use guns or bows it doesn’t seem to matter but most have gone mid evil on the monsters ass. That’s right bows, cross bows, and some even just throw shit. Police agencies, military, private contractors all want these “heroes” to help defend the world. Bad news is not everyone is a “hero” and if you’re not most people don’t give a rats ass. Governments decided that some taboo stuff is taboo still. Yea cause who cares if skeletons attack us or demons or other crazy shit so long as no one else uses them. Because that makes so much sense. Like just because some group of people order hey this is bad, then everyone else should rightly obey and agree. When we the common people don’t matter to those in charge and they boot lick the heroes. I don’t care where the help comes from.
Where does the healing come from with clerics? What about the wizards spells? Hell I would love to know how a high level Warrior can cut through a car. That is not normal. But hey some spells are bad, and some classes are bad too… unless you just GET it.. Right. Can someone explain this to me?
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The Event hit the world and most were left class-less. Only some events, achievements, or special circumstance just gave a person a class or even abilities. All the rest were gained by a book. But this is something only super rich could afford. Not a minimum wage guy. All these special things from dungeons were kept by the government, police, military, and these special agencies. It’s a premium they said. It is a precious resource that can’t be wasted they said.
Everytime one of these heroes stopped at the station they expected to be treated like a celebrity. They expect to be first in line, and to get free stuff because they are saving the world and protecting it from “EVIL”. Yea.. and their bloated over inflated ego or head isn’t a problem either.
I thought nothing would change these facts. Until one hot and steamy night I had waited for most of the pumps to be empty so I could get out there and empty the cans next to each pump. A few times I considered tossing those trash bags into the tar pit next to the four legged dinasour in front of the shop. But I figured it would look bad on camera and if any of the trash floated. But isn’t this how they make landfills?
Anyway when the day was over 110 degrees outside then the food and beer people toss into those cans have a special smell of death and decay in it. It’s a special kind of sick smell that will actually draw bees to them. I was trying to pull out the trash bag but like every other time the bag is over loaded I could get it part way out of the mess before it then splits down the side.
Spatter and splush it all flows over the can, the concrete, my shoes, and pants leg. /facepalm This is just another reason why I can’t stand working here. Why would anyone want to do this stuff. I hold my breath and have to walk away to keep from vomiting right there on the spot. I make repeated attempts to clean up the foul debris now scattered on the ground and the tipped over can.
Inside the midst of the nastiest muck you’d ever see was a dark colored tome. The kind that is leather or something you would find in European museums. But this book was strange. It wasn’t just flat leather but had designs that were coming out of the leather. Like the leather was holding back what was inside it. And the book wasn’t just dark, it was black. This black was so dark it was like it absorbed the ambient light. I could only assume someone dumped the book in the can and maybe they stole it or got it from a dungeon. They said some things you could get from a dungeon is illegal. So at least they would take it from you after stiff questioning. But if it didn’t go well they would lock you up for even possessing it.
In hopes of getting my own class I kept the book with the second bag I gathered the trash up in, and put the book on top in the bag. Once I took everything around back I snuck the book out by the dumpster and hid it in the side of the dumpster. One of those holes the giant forks go into in order to lift and dump the can. Then, I finished the shift like i normally would with one exception. I drove round to the dumpster and emptied the trash from my car while getting the book from the can.
Everything went well, and I got home free of harassment. I tried to clean up the book but even it had its own scent to it aside from the trash smell it was in all day. Eventually I opened the latches on the cover, and looked inside.
When I woke up I was on the floor. I felt cool, with a slight headache. And I had the worst case of cottonmouth you’d ever dream of. I got a glass of water and took a couple of ibuprofen to help with the headach.
“what the hell happened…”
WOOSH!!! Congratulations Hero, you are recognized as a Necromancer! Lights and fan fair.
I was dead silent. There are little lights that swirled about me with sparkles that rained down afterwards. Like the world provided a tiny little party in the comfort of my own home that was accompanied with a short musical clip.
“That’s it.”
Pause…
“That’s literally it?”
Pause…
There is only one word for this. Underwhelming. This is absolutely underwhelming. There is no difference. I don’t feel any different than what I felt like yesterday except my head hurts, I’m hungry, and my body hurts where I was lying on the floor. So I check the mirror in the bathroom. No I’m no different. Well maybe a little more pale… guh. This sucks. What’s so special about a class? Everyone else was ecstatic and boasted about all kinds of things. What’s so special about this one?
-Ding!!! Congratulations Necromancer! Your first quest is to raise a lesser undead. -
Huh.. Raise the dead and have them fight for me? Ok, not too bad. Does this come with a user manual or instruction book?
Pause…. No response.
Well I guess I have to find a body to raise it… /sigh yes because there are bodies all over the place. And checking my phone, it looks like among the classes the Necromancer is one of the classes on the taboo list. Great so books, skills, and items related to necromancers are illegal to sell and buy. But if you are one then they won’t lock you up unless you are doing things against the laws. Like stealing from cemeteries or invading a town with a horde of undead. Well this is going to be harder than it looks.
/chuckling “that’s what she said….”