Nervously, and acutely aware of how nervous she was, Sarah extended her hand to take Diana’s. Even though the woman's grip was strong, her hands still felt soft and delicate. Sarah pulled her own sweat soaked hand, which seemed extra limp to her, back, then introduced herself as ‘Sarah Becker’.

“Well, Sarah,” Diana said, pushing her glasses up, “Again, welcome home. If you’re planning to stay here anyway.”

Sarah was curious to see what sort of place this carved-from-marble woman would live in, but she still nervously glanced over her shoulder.

“I’ll wait out here for your aunt,” Cristal said, producing her phone from her pocket, “She’ll be here in a few lines.”

“Lines?”

“Minutes.”

Sarah looked hesitantly at the door, which had been decorated with a wreath of purple star-shaped flowers.

“She doesn’t bite,” Cristal reiterated, nodding to the door, “Get inside before you catch a cold.”

Even though it wasn’t that chilly, Sarah nodded and followed the woman into the house, hearing the sound of Aunt May’s car heading into the street as she did. The heavy brown oak door fell shut behind them, leaving Sarah alone with the strange woman. ...Even though Diana’s clothes could barely be considered an outfit, Sarah felt underdressed now that she was alone with her.

“You can put your bag and jacket anywhere,” Diana said airily, “I’ll make you some...coffee?...tea?...Something stronger?”

Sarah briefly considered asking for a glass of vodka, then weakly said tea was fine.

“I’ll get dressed and be with you in a bit,” Diana said, “Just follow the sound of the tv.”

Sarah hadn’t noticed it when she entered, but when she payed attention, she could hear the soft drone of a television, which appeared to be playing some kids’ show.

“Thanks,” Sarah replied and hung her stuff on the coat rack, which she noticed, on closer inspection, resembled a row of small, but rigid, bronze phalli.

She glanced down the hall at Diana, who just disappeared into what was probably the kitchen, then shrugged and just wrote it off to the woman’s sense of humor.

Following the sound of the television, she found herself in a small but spacious side room. If she had to describe it, she’d call it a lounge. A fainting couch, in a surprising vibrant red velvet among the brown wood interior, stood on one side, flanked by two leather chairs on one side, with a similar black couch across from those. In the center of it all stood a low table with a neatly spread bouquet of chalice-shaped flowers, purple, and a multi-tiered tray, neatly decorated with cookies and chocolate, as a neighbor.

The outer wall was entirely given over to a set of three huge windows, which even in the middle of the day had the curtains, dark green with blue tassels, drawn. An odd decision, considering the window side of the room had been given over to a small forest of houseplants that cluttered the floor.

The interior wall held a collection of paintings, mostly portraits of women, though in the center was a large painting that looked like a piece from the Renaissance. Four horned, winged women showering a fifth figure with attention. The fifth figure being a handsome man, whose crotch had been covered with an orange cloth that did nothing to hide the product of the women’s affections. It took Sarah a moment to notice the man too had wings, but where the women had batlike wing, the man’s were swanlike. For some time, Sarah tried to remember if she knew this bible story, then suddenly was brought back from her reverie by the television that decorated the third wall. She glanced at the device on which a girl, who was very pink, was singing about brushing your teeth. The whole thing seemed bizarrely out of place in this room. Sarah assumed the news or such must’ve been on after or before the kid’s show, and Diana was planning to watch that. She glanced at the painting again, then resolutely decided to sit with her back to the work in one of the comfortable leather chairs.

Diana appeared a moment later.

“Did they already do the song?” she asked, looking slightly irked when Sarah nodded. Sarah hid a look of confusion at the woman’s enjoyment of a children’s show, then pointedly stared at the tv when she saw what Diana was wearing.

It seemed the designer of the dress couldn’t decide if they wanted to go for sexy or cute, as such the white garment ended up decorated with an odd pattern of smiling sausages on forks, but also enough cleavage to make a butcher jealous.

“So,” Diana said, taking the cups from her tea tray and neatly placing them on the table, then holding the metal over her chest, “What flavor tea would you like?”

“Any is fine…”

“But I have,” Diana said, then started a seemingly endless list of flavors available. When she got to the F’s Sarah hastily stopped her at ‘That one’, afraid that it would go on forever.

“Forest fruits,” Diana smiled warmly, “Coming right up.”

The author's content has been appropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

Again, Sarah was left alone with the kids show, that had trudged along to a man in an odd purple fairy dress and a bunch of puppets fighting a machine that shot taffy.

“What even is this?” Sarah mumbled, glad to hear Diana’s shoes click back into the room.

She dropped down on the couch across from her, hung the tea bags in the cups, then very slowly crossed her knees, leaned her elbows on them and her chin on her folded hands.

“So,” she said again, “Sarah Becker.”

“That’s me,” Sarah said, politely trying to keep eye contact with the woman. The woman’s glasses slowly slipped down her nose, before she hurriedly pushed them back up. Briefly Sarah thought Diana’s eyes were an odd swirling red, but that was probably just a trick of the light.

“You need a room?” she asked pleasantly, as if she didn’t know why Sarah was there.

“It’s not so much that I need a room, but I want a better one.”

As she spoke, Sarah noticed from the corner of her eye that she was tracing undefinable patterns in the air with her finger. Even though they added nothing to her words.

“And Aunt May said I could get one here for a dollar a month… Which leads me to my question…”

She dropped her hand dropped to her lap to stop the unconscious drawing, “How?”

Diana let out a soft giggle, “I don’t need the money. I just want the company.”

“Then why…”

“Just formalities. Should I give you the tour?”

Sarah rolled her eyes up, briefly considering if the awkward conversation would become less so and, deciding that it probably wouldn’t, she nodded.

“Sure… As long as this doesn’t lead to me being locked in your dungeon.”

Momentarily, Diana looked nonplussed at Sarah, then giggled again.

“Of course not,” she said, then added under her breath, “We just met after all.”

“What?”

“Nothing. Come on, I’ll show you around. Oh, the tea…”

Diana picked up the steaming glass of amber liquid and downed it without a second thought. When she put it down, three honey colored points faded from where Diana’s fingers had been, leaving only a couple of new dents.

Sarah looked for the source of the orange light that had played on the glass, couldn’t find it, then shrugged it off as her imagination.

“You’re not going to drink yours?”

“Can’t say I have your strong throat,” Sarah replied, “I’ll get to it later.”

“Very well then, follow me.”

Diana had led Sarah through the hallway, talking as she did. Sarah only half listened, fascinated by the new sights of this strange woman’s house.

The first room she showed was the library. It wasn’t big, but it was well stocked. A bay window had been filled with comfy pillows, which was one of only two places to sit. Next to the window was well worn leather chair, facing outside, where Sarah assumed Diana did her reading.

“You’re free to read the books,” Diana smiled, “Just put them back where you found them and… Stay out of the restricted section. Those books bite.”

“What?”

Diana chuckled, “Nothing, but if the book’s behind glass, please don’t touch it. They’re collectables.”

Sarah looked at the displayed books, wondering what kind of literature the ancient-looking leather bound tomes held.

“Next room. You can read later.” Diana said, taking Sarah by the wrist. Her hand was a strange mix of warm in the fingertips, but a pleasantly cool palm.

“The kitchen’s a bit on the tiny side,” Diana said apologetically, showing Sarah to one of the many doors in the hallway.

The kitchen was thrice the size of her current apartment, which was so small that she could theoretically fry an egg while she did her business, then probably get into bed with two steps.

“It’s great,” she hastily said when she saw Diana’s proud beaming at her perfectly maintained kitchen, “I don’t cook much anyway.”

“Take-away every day, and your belly will pay,” Diana said, poking her fingers in Sarah’s side.

“Personal space, please” was Sarah's response, gently pushing the fingers away.

“Sorry, I get excitable sometimes,” she said, her face falling.

Sarah shrugged, “Let’s just continue the tour.”

Diana lit up again, her embarrassment apparently immediately forgotten.

“Oh. Thing about the fridge. It’s communal unless you put your name on something, so if you have family sending you cookies or something, don’t forget that.”

“There’s other people living here?”

“Sometimes. One’s a model, so she’s not around much. The other rarely leaves his room, so don’t be surprised if you don’t see him often. Then there’s Pan and Penny. Penny’s pretty sociable, but Pan keeps to himself. They're traveling though.”

Sarah shrugged, “I guess the house is big enough for six people, wait… Pan?”

“Surname. But you’re right. Plenty of space. I still have three empty bedrooms even,” Diana said, the delight obvious in her words, “Don’t you just love a bustling household?”

“...Sure.”

“Okay, so here’s the living room…”

It took at least an hour and a half for the tour to be over and Diana showed Sarah to what would be her room. A round room in a part of the house that Sarah would describe as a turret. The room was empty save for a four-poster bed that currently was missing the linen, a rickety chair and a desk that was too low for her to work at. In this room too, the curtains were all drawn. She briefly considered saying something about one buck being too expensive for this room when she saw Diana cover her cheeks in shock.

“I’m sorry,” she said, “I’ve put all the stuff in the laundry, but didn’t put anything back on the bed. I guess it’s fine if you’re not staying but…”

Sarah looked at Diana, something about seeing the excitement drain from her face and the soft pout that started to form in her bottom lip left her to answer.

“...I’ll take the room.”

The radiant smile on Diana’s face reassured Sarah that she had made the right choice in taking it and she should be sure to thank her aunt for finding it, then suddenly remembered.

“Diana! We forgot…”

“Cristal and your aunt? Cristal has a key, so she’s inside already… probably.”

“Oh...good.”

“Want to give me a hand with the bed?”

“...It’s my room, isn’t it?”

Diana nodded, then looked thoughtful for a moment.

“White sheets? Red sheets? Black? Blue? Green?”

“Whatever you have for me. …I know I don’t have the sheets for a bed this size.”

“Comes with the room,” Diana said, then studied Sarah quietly for some time, before very resolutely deciding.

‘Pink sheet, blue blanket. I’ll go get them.”

“Shouldn’t I help you get them?”

“No can do,” Diana said, lightly walking out of the room, “The washer and dryer are in the basement.”

“And?”

“House rule. The basement’s off limit. Unless I tell you it’s okay.”

“House rule. Are there many of those?”

“A few. You’ll pick them up sooner or later.”

Sarah nodded, then listened to Diana run down the stairs.

She blinked a few times, then realized what she had done. Confused at her readily agreeing to the strange living situation, she walked to the window and pulled one of the curtains open.

In the garden across from Diana’s house, the old man still quietly watched.