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Saints and Suffering: A Naruto Fanfiction
Chapter 53- The Desert Bloom and the Fall of Babylon

Chapter 53- The Desert Bloom and the Fall of Babylon

Chapter 53- The Desert Bloom and the Fall of Babylon

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Shijin had been wandering the decaying battlefields for days. The first day, he had found several Kumo squads, the next even more. but fairly soon after that, it started becoming harder and harder to find them.

And while Kumo ninja had been attacking him on sight at first, now they only ran, causing him to spend a little effort in chasing them down.

Shijin was still in the process of awakening his eyes, and each Kumo nin helped the process along just a little further, as he absorbed their chakra and life force with the Preta Path.

The last group of Kumo shinobi he encountered taunted him at first after seeing his Konoha headband. They slowly encircled him, and after cutting off all escape paths, they considered Shijin as good as dead.

There were 4 of them, all chuunin, and one of them was a decent sensor, and had let his teammates know that Shijin was low genin level and posed no threat. Still though, more ninja had died to underestimation and explosive seals than almost any other weapon other than kunai.

Shijin was unimpressed with their display and posturing, and simply looked on without comment.

The team leader finally spat out a curse.

  "Cat got your tongue, fucking tree hugger?

  Not gonna say anything before you die?

  I can't believe that Konoha keeps sending out brats like you.

  I'll carve another mark into my hilt for you."

That however, finally caught Shijin's attention.

  "Brats?"

The Kumo nin laughed.

  "Worried about your friends? Well they're all dead, idiot!

  You fuckers shouldn't have sent kids to a warzone.

  You fucking hypocrites, so high and mighty, will of fire shit this and that.

  You're the fucking worst!

  You sent them to die, and we obliged,

  I can see it in your eyes.

  You hate me don't you?"

Shijin said nothing as the man continued.

  "You're the only ones that do that shit you know

  Even those donkey fuckers in Iwa wait until their kids are useful enough to die productively.

  You Konoha bitches though

  You send em early. What's the youngest we saw boys? 8? 9?

  That kid wasn't ten! I know that much...

  And you fuckers gave him a knife and told him to come kill us.

  And when we defend ourselves, we're the bad guys.

  And you fuckers go home, beat the war drums.

  Talk about the will of fire, and send more kids into the reaping fields.

  What, you gonna cry?

  Fuck you!"

Shijin stood their motionlessly, head held low, staring at the ground.

His eyes, no matter their current state, were once Sharingan.

And the defining feature of the Sharingan was that it grew stronger with hate.

How lucky for Shijin to find someone so deplorable in this battlefield full or corpses and the stench of rot.

Someone responsible for the death of many children. Someone it was so easy to hate.

When you hated him, it felt good.

It burned like the sting of powerful wine.

Intoxicating, yet leaving you thirstier than when you started.

Shijin continued to stare at the ground, drinking in the emotion, letting his rage and wrath stew and ferment.

He hated. He hated so much. He had never hated someone so thoroughly since Itachi, who still left him full of conflicting, raging emotion after all these years.

He was so confused following his years in the Nothing Dimension. He could no longer feel anything, he knew neither hunger nor thirst. He wanted for nothing, and he lacked nothing. As content to sit still until he faded away as he was content to stay in motion.

He had no Animus, and it was Yama that gave him that. Yama was the one who said "Let's go back in time".

Yama was the one that said "Let's go defeat Kaguya."

Yama was the one that said "We can make things better."

Yama was so very wrong.

Things were not better. Things were not even the same.

Things were worse.

Shijin could see that beyond any doubt.

Yama didn't see the barren world of the future like Shijin did. Yama saw the grave of billions and an empty husk of a world once filled with life.

Shijin saw the truth. Shijin saw the stars that faded. Shijin knew that the world would become an empty husk sooner or later.

Shijin, while Yama had been away, once picked up a fistful of dust and let it slip from his grasp.

As the dust trailed through his fingers, Kaguya was so distant and so small that he could not tell the difference. His eyes, having matured for eons, saw the truth of the matter, which was that nothing mattered.

Eons from now, this planet would once again become sterile. Minus a god tree, plus a god tree, it didn't matter. It all came to an end. Whether Kaguya lived or died, won or lost, it mattered not.

The only thing that mattered was that Shijin was once more filled with hate, once more caught in the fatal coil of mortality.

Once more, Shijin was at odds with existence.

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Shijin spoke to himself, ignoring the surrounding Kumo nin, and for the first time in a very long time, Shijin knew what he felt.

  "I'm tired of living."

The Kumo team leader hissed.

  "Well that can be arranged, I'll put you to sleep forever!"

And the leader threw a kunai at Shijin's forehead and charged in as the blade flew at its target.

Shijin, without looking up or even glancing at the kunai hurtling towards his skull, languidly, lazily reached up, and as softly as if he was brushing away a flower petal, caught it and redirected it to the shinobi on his right, multiplying its speed.

The kunai then screamed through the air before blowing a fist sized hole through the other ninja's chest, obliterating his heart.

The ninja behind Shijin then threw a double fistful of shuriken at Shijin's back.

As Shijin calmly stepped aside, he continued talking to himself while the shuriken flew past him and impaled the team leader who hadn't seen the attack coming.

  "I'm tired of this place."

As the Kumo Team leader stumbled past him, Shijin tugged the man's sword from his grip, easily prying the dying man's fingers from the hilt of the blade.

Shijin made a quick slash, and cleaved through the back half of the man's neck to end his suffering.

The two remaining Kumo ninja looked at each other for a fraction of a second before charging in at the same time.

Shijin avoided their first attacks, killing one with a slash to the stomach before throwing the sword through the other's head, nailing him to a tree several yards away.

Shijin continued.

  "I'm tired of being caught in the tangle of their lives."

Shijin looked around him, eyes a swirling kaleidoscope of maroon and lilac, featuring the all to familiar concentric rings and tomoe of the Rinnesharingan.

Shijin was so very tired, and he hated so deeply.

Shijin didn't look at the four new corpses added to the battlefield. In a few days, you wound't be able to tell who was freshly dead and who wasn't.

The scavengers would come the same, rot would come the same, and the flesh would slough from their bones the same.

It mattered not.

What Shijin was looking for was chakra signatures. He eyes scanned the horizons in every direction, and he concluded that these were the last of the Kumo nin in the area. He had avenged his genin properly.

However, he now realized he had a much more important task.

Shijin looked to the South East, as felt as much as he saw the hole in reality that was Yama, and he started making his way towards him.

Before he took his first step however, Shijin muttered to himself quietly.

  "We were never meant to be here."

Shijin did not hate Yama. No, he loved Yama.

Who Shijin hated was himself. He who wanted to save everyone, but knew that it didn't matter.

He who knew that his presence here was only making things worse, yet remained.

He who exists as the Avenger.

He who loves too deeply.

Deeply flawed, hypocritical, and more than all of that, broken.

Shijin was not meant to be here.

Shijin was not meant to be alive.

Shijin was not meant to exist.

Yama was the same. Yama had just yet to realize it.

Shijin had to stop him before he could.

If he did realize it, Yama would suffer too much.

Yama had already suffered enough.

Shijin could spare him the pain of reality.

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Yama, locked away by the Fire Daimyo and under guard by one of the 12 guardian ninja at all times, was a good prisoner.

He made no attempts at escape, and he complied with every order. His genins' lives lay in the balance.

He had lots and lots of spare time, and he spent it meditating.

Yama didn't know how long ago it had happened, but about a day or two after he started meditating, he finally met Kurama again, and the best thing ever happened, it wasn't Ginou, it wasn't this Kurama, it was his Kurama!

It was nice to have some company while he waited. He and Kurama had been talking a lot recently.

As he calmed his breath and chakra and slipped into a deep meditation, he once again traveled to his mindscape, the sewer that had once held his friend.

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Yama first meeting with Kurama was special, and even Yama could feel that he changed for the better after it.

At first, Yama had thought the sewer had changed a lot, but everything was still the same upon second look.

The God Tree was here now, that was cool, and all the sealing arrays were gone, but that was fine.

But the best part was that Kurama was back!

Yama had trouble telling who it was at first, with their nebulous appearance.

Kurama was now all inky black and purple, and he didn't look like a fox anymore. He just kinda sat deep in the shadows and writhed around like a ball of snakes. He didn't have his normal eyes anymore, or any eyes really, and his mouth was now a little too wide and took up too much of his body, and he didn't have a head, but it was still his Kurama!

Yama wouldn't have known it was his Kurama until he talked to it though.

One day, he was meditating, and he actually started talking to himself a little bit while he was walking around his mindscape and thinking. He really couldn't figure out a lot of this political stuff with the Daimyo and talking it out was helping him a little.

As soon as Shijin came back though, he'd know what to do, and he'd help Yama outta this predicament.

But while Yama was talking to himself, his train of thoughts got interrupted when a voice reached out to him.

  "Why are you even trying? It won't do any good."

Yama was a bit startled for a second before replying.

  "And who are you?"

  "Me? I'm the one sealed within you obviously.

  I am Hatred Incarnate."

  "Seriously, who are you?"

  "I already told you.

  Why won't you listen to me?

  I listen to you. All the time in fact.

  I know all about the war, the Daimyo, your genin, even Shijin.

  But I also remember Kaguya, Naruto, Sasuke. I remember everything.

  The boys who tried to stop a god and failed.

  I can help you, you know.

  Destroy Everything, Erase anything that hurts you

  Entrust your heart to me, and I will save you from the pain!"

Yama's eyes lit up. He recognized that way of talking anywhere! No one other than Kurama would ever talk like that, and Kurama had been weird lately, ever since he purified the bijuu and Kurama started going by Ginou, he had been acting weird. This was normal though. This was the Kurama that Yama remembered from the past, the one that had died, or so he thought.

  "Kurama! Why didn't you just say so?

  How did you survive? I felt you die a whole buncha times?

  Was it just a matter of time till you regenerated, ah man, you bijuu got the best luck."

"Kurama" would've quirked an eyebrow had it any.

  "Must you call me that name?

  There are other that I prefer to go by."

Yama laughed and scratched his head.

  "Well, I'm not calling you Kyuubi, we're friends and partners now and forever."

  "Partners?"

Yama smiled and reached out with his fist.

  "Now and forever!"

The Incarnation of Hatred was unused to such treatment. The foul fox had guarded it for so long that it had forgotten much.

But recently, it was starting to remember. Its time within this Yama was reconnecting it with humanity.

All the new fears, all the new lies, and yes all of the new Hatred.

But the one he was sealed in, Yama, so strong, so uncorruptable, but so flawed, so cracked, and so disgustingly human.

Whoever, or whatever had left the cracks in Yama's soul had done the Incarnation a huge favor.

Whoever, or whatever had sealed it within Yama's soul had done the Incarnation a huge favor.

The Sage had sealed the incarnations within the Bijuu as a human was obviously the wrong choice. It would be like sealing water within ice. It may work for a time, but ultimately, they are the same, and there can be no everlasting borders.

The Incarnation of Hatred stared curiously at Yama's fist, and with slow and methodical movements, it reached out with a fleshy appendage of pure corruption and touched Yama's fist.

Yama then used Ninshu, the gift of the Sage of Six Paths to Humanity, in order to unite his soul with the Incarnation of Hatred.

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Yama still thinking about his first reunion with Kurama, suddenly cut his thoughts short, as he reappeared in front of his friend.

Today's argument would probably go the same as it always had, but Yama knew that he would be able to break through to Kurama, just like he did before.

Kurama spoke first.

  "Humans are evil. They kill, they steal, they do evil.

  They are Proud without Humility.

  Lazy without Diligence.

  Gluttonous without Temperance.

  Lustful without Love.

  Envious without Kindness.

  Greedy without Charity.

  Wrathful without Patience.

  They hate without end."

Yama laughed it off.

  "Yeah, Yeah, the whole spiel again.

  I'll end the cycle of hatred.

  It stops with me.

  I'm not going to hate anyone, and I will take on all the pain."

  "They will all hate you then."

  "I can handle it."

  "I don't think you can.

  You might lose everyone.

  You might have to walk alone."

Yama gave a wide grin with his thumb out.

  "I don't think that hard about it.

  I'm gonna do it because I said I would, that's my nindo."

The Incarnation sat quietly and let its intimate relationship with its host sink further and further in.

As it pried into the deepest and darkest corners of Yama, it finally knew what to say.

  "You said you would stop Kaguya didn't you?"

Yama frowned.

  "That's different. I failed last time, but I'm still here and I'm still fighting.

  Haven't lost yet."

  "But what about this war?

  You came back to make things better, but you created a war?"

  "You don't know that, Kurama."

  "But I do, if the only difference is you, then you must've caused it."

  "It isn't like that."

  "It isn't?"

  "Drop it."

  "Very well.

  Are you really ready to become hated though?"

  "It won't come to that."

  "Do you remember what Shijin and Ginou said?

  There is only one way to end this war.

  And you will have to bear much hatred."

  "I said it won't come to that!"

  "What will you do when you realize the truth?"

  "What truth?"

  "You can't save anyone, much less everyone!"

  "Goddamnit Kurama! You're being a real asshole.

  We'll talk tomorrow."

Yama ended his meditation in a bad mood.

He and Kurama had been constantly fighting the past few conversations.

Kurama was just underestimating him, yeah!

Yama is still the number one Knuckle-headed Ninja out there!

Even if he can't see any solutions right now, he'll find them later.

It won't come down to the worst possible outcome.

It won't.

Yama turned his senses inward, not seeing or listening to what went on around him.

Everything was okay. Everything would be okay.

He just needed to stick tight and make sure his genin stayed safe. If he did anything, his genin might die.

At least that was something he and Kurama agreed on.