I groaned, sitting up in the dark, blinking to shake off the grogginess. My eyelids felt heavy, and my head pounded like I was hungover. Where was I? Oh yeah, that crazy weird room in Doreen's.

Shit. I need to go.

Finally, a proper groggy awakening—one that didn’t feel like I had been doused in water—and I had to pee. I’d had like two cups of tea all day, but then again, I did spend a week in a time anomaly. How does that even work with food?

“I should’ve had Felix show me where the bathroom was... Dammit.”

I looked across the massive, overly plush bed and saw a dimly glowing purple orb. Did I really fall asleep tinkering with it? Yeah, I definitely did.

I reached out and grabbed it. As soon as I made contact, I felt a slight tugging sensation through my hand. The orb’s light flared up with renewed brightness. That feeling had to be mana, right? I’d felt it a few times before. Even Winchester had a similar sensation when I held it.

“Okay,” I said, holding the orb out to light up the room. “Let’s go pee in another world.”

I swung my legs over the side of the bed and took a step, only to trip on the edge of the carpet. I managed to catch myself on a nearby shelf, but it tipped, sending a plate armor helmet tumbling down. It hit the one spot on the floor not covered with rugs, the metallic clang echoing through the room. I winced.

This room was a war zone for anyone trying to walk in the dark. I nearly took out a suit of armor, only managing to save myself by grabbing a coat rack that creaked under my weight

“Great,” I muttered, stumbling toward the door and managing to knock over a chair in the process. “Let’s just wake up the whole building full of magical warriors, Ben. Real smooth.”

I paused for a moment, taking in the chaos. This was going to happen every time I had to walk around at night if I didn't do something about it. Maybe Doreen could help?

The hallway was dimly lit, with only a few lantern orbs glowing softly. I tried to move quietly, but every creak of the floor seemed deafening in the stillness of the night. I chided myself again, gripping the glowing orb tighter.

No one stirred. It was actually eerily quiet. I guess in a place with no technology or light pollution, it would be.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, I made it through the empty common room and out into the street. The night air was warm, and the stone felt cool on my bare feet. I had forgotten to even put on a shirt. It was surprisingly less dark outside; dim lantern orbs about the size of grapefruits were interspersed around the street, mostly at eye-level.

“Right, two doors down…” I set off towards the harbor I had seen earlier. It felt like the right direction. About eighty meters away, some promising symbols led me to an alleyway with a single lantern orb at the far end.

“Oh good, sketchy bathroom in a dark alleyway. What could go wrong?”

It… was a public bathroom, plumbing and all. Clean, simple, old school, but more or less what I had expected. The toilets were also bidets, which was a bit of a surprise since I wasn’t sitting down when I triggered it.

“Well, that could have been a lot worse,” I said as I exited. On my way back up to the street, I heard a weird clattering sound. I noticed movement in the dim light ahead—maybe a dog?

It was a crab. Holy shit, it was a big crab. It wasn’t monstrous, but it was huge—like an Alaskan King Crab, and faster. It scuttled forward, faster than any crab should, and the sharp clack of its legs against the stone road filled the air. Those claws looked strong enough to break bone. Was that a Carapax? It was red and spiked, like a King Crab, but it had a glint under the dim lights that made it look almost like an oil slick. It snapped its massive claws in the air with a pop that sounded disturbingly like gunshots.

I reached out for Bravery, feeling the familiar spring return and wind up tight. I turned to run, but instead found myself walking toward the crab.

“I’m wearing nothing but pants. This is a bad idea. Turn around, Ben. Run.”

Fuck the crab, I have magic. How many crabs have I eaten?

Yeah, I’d eaten a lot of crab. And goddamn if that wasn’t what I needed to hear. Was this the Bravery magic? It felt like a natural thought.

I stopped walking as the crab caught sight of me and dashed up the street, its shell clacking loudly on the stone.

The rune—or the spell—had changed. It was closer, more focused. All that mattered was the crab in front of me. Oh shit.

Snap.

I didn’t even have time to think. My body moved on its own, dodging to the side as the Carapax lunged, its claws snapping with a sound that echoed off the high stone walls of the buildings. The movement threw me off balance, and as I went to take a step, I tripped, crashing over a street cart.

The Carapax, seemingly confused by how it missed, turned and hissed—a strange, high-pitched noise. Can crabs even do that? It jumped on top of the cart, claws snapping in the air menacingly.

I glanced into the cart to see fishing nets, some dry lumber, and a big hammer—really just a five-pound sledgehammer with a well-worn shaft. That should be enough to handle a crab with a solid hit.

I scrambled to my feet, my heart pounding as the Carapax ducked reactively. I ran two steps, dropped, and kicked my feet out, knocking the cart over. The crab, disoriented, hissed again as it flew backward, landing with a loud crack.

Pocketing my lantern orb, I rounded the cart for my prize. The Carapax had landed on its back and was scrambling desperately to get upright. I picked up the hammer as it recovered and locked eyes with me.

“Oh,” I said, nodding at the crab. “Now he has a hammer.”

The creature didn’t hesitate.

It lunged, but I was already moving, stepping to the side and bringing the hammer down—slightly off-target. A loud pop echoed off the walls, and the stone ground cracked with a spark. The Carapax caught the cart with a devastating claw, sending pieces of it flying in splinters. It scuttled awkwardly, trying to face me.

It was too late.

Crack.

The sledgehammer struck true, cracking deep into the crab’s shell. The impact drove its legs out from under it.

Crack.

One more for good measure.

“Always double-tap,” I muttered as the Carapax fell limp, very dead. “Guess I’m making crab cakes,” I added, reaching down for a claw to pick it up. I paused.

What was that smell? Not the crab. There was a distinct scent—something sweet and earthy in the air. Even in the bathroom. Was that poppies?

This was a monster—a magical thing I knew nothing about. It had taken the Monster Hunters days to deal with them before.

The streets snapped back into focus around me. I looked towards Doreen’s but didn’t see anything. But further up the road, there was something…

“Oh shit.”

At least two dozen king crabs came clacking up the street towards me, a shimmering blue mist roiling in behind them. There was a fine line between bravery and stupidity, and I knew which one I was leaning towards.

I turned and ran, leaping over a cart as I sprinted straight back to Doreen’s. My voice echoed through the empty streets as I screamed, “Wake the fuck up! Carapax!”

I burst through Doreen’s door, slamming it behind me and making as much noise as possible. I threw plates, yelled until my voice went hoarse—anything to wake someone up. But no one stirred. Panic started to claw at my mind, and I felt the Bravery magic begin to ebb away. Why wasn’t anyone waking up?

I ran down one of the hallways, frantically trying door after door. Locked. Every door in the hallway was locked. I banged on them with both fists, screaming as loudly as I could.

Nothing.

Oh no. Was I in some kind of spirit realm? Was everyone gone? Had they ever been here at all? Was I hallucinating the whole thing?

I fell to my knees outside one of the doors, despair starting to set in.

“Acolyte, what the fuck are you doing?” a voice snapped me out of my spiral. The tone was sharp, filled with irritation but also a hint of concern. Further down the hall stood the tall Viking-looking guy. Elara had called him… Ironheart? He was wearing red satin pajamas, complete with a monogrammed “EW” stitched over the breast. He was even wearing slippers.

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I caught my breath, trying to gather my thoughts. I’d been in enough emergency situations to know that being clear and concise was key.

“There’s at least thirty Carapaxes… Carapai? Thirty of them outside, maybe more. No one is waking up, and all the doors are locked.”

Ironheart raised an eyebrow. Was I supposed to say more?

“Show me,” he ordered. I nodded, getting to my feet and leading him back through the common room.

“Ben Crawford, right?” he asked as we walked.

I nodded. “Yeah.”

“Erik Winters,” he introduced himself. “Let’s have a look.” He put his finger to his lips in a gesture for silence. Of course his name was Erik—he even looked like an Erik. Probably with a ‘k’ at the end. Why were names so familiar here? Wasn’t I supposed to be on the other side of the universe or something?

Erik opened the door and leaned out, peering around with a casual air. He grunted in disdain, then backed out of the entrance and closed the door. His arm was now encased in plate armor up to the shoulder, and a large crab dangled from it, its claw locked firmly around the metal.

Erik examined the Carapax hanging from his arm, then grabbed it with his other bare hand. With a sickening crack, he pulled it off, leaving the claw and most of the arm still wrapped around the armor. The creature thrashed wildly, but Erik’s grip was unyielding. With his plated hand, he grasped the top shell and ripped it off with a grotesque tearing sound. The Carapax let out a high-pitched squeal that made me wince, though Erik seemed unfazed. He tossed the shell aside and buried his hand in the crab’s innards, rooting around until he pulled out a small blue pearl.

I stared, wide-eyed, as he tossed the now-lifeless crab onto a table in the common room. He turned to me, his hand outstretched, holding the pearl.

“Here, mana pearl,” he said, tossing it to me.

I had no idea what a mana pearl was, but I caught it and put it in my pants pocket alongside the now-dim lantern orb.

“Let’s sound the alarm,” Erik said, walking up a set of stairs and banging on a large set of double doors with a sign on it that read, “Doreen’s Room, fuck off.” He paused for a moment, rolling his eyes at the sign before pounding on the doors repeatedly, the sound echoing through the hallway.

Erik grunted in frustration, "I'm breaking it down." He placed his hand over the door, as if trying to sense something. After a moment, his expression hardened, and his boot suddenly became encased in plate armor. With a swift, powerful kick, he sent the door flying open, the impact echoing through the hallway.

Erik and I rushed into the room, our eyes scanning quickly for any sign of Doreen. She was on the floor, looking as though she had tried to get up and then collapsed, her body sprawled awkwardly.

Erik knelt down beside Doreen, shaking her shoulder gently. "Doreen, wake up," he said, his voice carrying a note of concern.

She stirred slightly, her eyes barely opening, and muttered, "Fuck off," before drifting back into unconsciousness.

Erik cursed under his breath. "Shit. She's not waking up.”

Poppies. There it was again. Weren’t poppy seeds used for sedatives?

“I’ve smelled poppies since I woke up. Is this sleep magic or something?” I asked and Erik seemed briefly intrigued.

“I don’t smell anything…” He started. “These things can’t do that kind of magic. They’re Class F. But something is definitely putting everyone to sleep. I can feel it.”

He lifted Doreen up gently and put her on a high shelf, as if to protect her from anything on the floor.

“We need to get to the tower. They’ll have charms to help with this and more hunters to push whatever is happening back. Stay behind me and… bring your little hammer.”

I looked at the sledge in my hands.

“Hey its not the size of the tool that matters…” I started but Erik’s deadpan look stopped me. He sighed and walked out of the room and into the common room.

I followed him but ducked into a hallway and grabbed a few more lantern orbs and stuffed them into my now bulging pocket. I had an idea.

“Give me a minute,” I said to Erik as he was about to open the door outside. I could clearly hear clicking and clacking on the stone outside now. The sound of smashing wood and glass filled the air as it seemed like crabs were trashing the streets.

“Make it quick,” Erik said in front of the door.

I renewed my hold on the Bravery spell and placed a lantern orb in a ceramic bowl on the table. I had made light turn infrared once, could I do it again?

I stared at its dim glow, visualizing the runic representation of light in my mind. Manipulating the orb without touching it was slow, difficult, and not something I had time to experiment with now. Instead, I grabbed the orb and poured everything I knew about light into it. The runic symbol overlaid perfectly with the schematic in my head, and I felt a surge of completion. The orb vibrated with power, and I could feel mana drawing from my hand as it lit up impossibly bright.

Infrared. No, short-wave infrared.

I dropped the orb back into the bowl and rushed back to the door. I could feel the pull of the orb—static running through my body toward it. The sensation wasn’t painful, but it was close. The red glow intensified inside the bowl until it burst, sending a shower of orange sparks to the ceiling and all over the common room, singing tables and upholstery. The bowl and table completely destroyed.

“That’ll do. I’ll let you explain the damage to Doreen though,” Erik said with an approving look. Holy crap, I could make bombs.

We went outside.

It was pure mayhem. Crabs were everywhere, smashing glass and clawing through doors into seemingly empty buildings. The building across from Doreen’s was apparently some kind of butcher shop because the crabs were killing each other to get to the meat inside a display case.

My danger sense kicked in, and I shifted to dodge, but Erik was already there, slamming a gauntleted fist into a Carapax. He was now in full dark plate armor that looked far more menacing than any Viking. If not for his blond hair and blue eyes, he was every bit a "Dark Knight." Could he just summon armor? Could I learn that?

We ran up the street toward the tower, crabs chasing us. Erik moved fast, vaulting over carts and barrels with ease, barely noticing them. It was parkour—even more impressive considering the heavy plate armor clattering around him.

I tried to keep up as best as I could, but I was still only wearing pants. I chided myself as my bare feet struggled to find traction on the smooth street. We were moving fast, much faster than I thought I could run, but the crabs were gaining on me.

My danger sense screamed, and I looked to my left.

A net.

I grabbed a fishing net from a barrel and spun, catching an advancing crab. I was a bit too slow, though, and its sharp legs pierced my side, sending lightning strikes of pain. Grabbing the net, I swung it around once and hurled the crab into the oncoming swarm with a loud crack. I pulled a lantern orb from my pocket and forced light into it again, then pushed it to infrared. The orb scalded my hand as I threw it at the crabs, my aim thrown off by the pain. It didn’t matter. The orb exploded into molten sparks, hitting several crabs like a shotgun blast, melting pieces of their shells and throwing them backward with pained screeches.

I kept running to catch up to Erik, but the pain in my chest and arm from the attack was intense. Two more crabs lunged at me, and I managed to smash them with my sledgehammer, though it took every ounce of effort. One had managed to snap at the handle, leaving behind only a sharp wooden stake and a hammer head. Rounding a corner, I saw Erik standing amidst a destroyed street and a pile of dead crabs. In his hands was a massive two-handed hammer, the shaft as thick as a fence post and the hammerhead made of dark stone. Runes glowed along his armored arms, and the hammer seemed to vibrate with power. Alright, I guess his was bigger.

Standing between us and the tower was a massive crab—the size of a bus—glowing with blue runes carved across its shell. A thick blue mist seeped from its body, and my vision swam and narrowed. It was too much; a sickly sweet scent assaulted me from all sides.

“What the fuck is that? It's huge.”

The crab let out a screech that shattered nearby windows, sending shards of glass raining down onto the cobblestone street. I covered my ears against the ringing, feeling the vibration in my bones as fragments tinkled and scattered around me. My head pounded, and I fought to stay focused.

Erik glanced back at me, his face hardening. “Stay sharp, Ben!” he yelled. “Wake up.”

The Bravery spell burned, and I felt the drowsiness recede, but the sense of danger in my chest was unlike anything I had felt up to now. That giant crab could easily kill me. It wouldn’t even need to try very hard. It wanted to kill me. I could feel its intent like something tangible in the air between us.

It was a lucky thing that the massive crab was much slower than a Carapax. It had two claws, one significantly larger than the other, almost like a fiddler crab. Was this some kind of different species?

Move!

I ducked to the side, rolling and cutting myself on debris as the huge claw slammed down onto the street with a bone-shaking crash. It didn’t try to snap at us—this thing seemed a lot more intelligent. It scuttled around, smashing buildings and the ground to keep us from getting past.

Erik managed to catch the claw with his hammer after a near-miss. An impossibly loud thud and a shockwave of air sent him flying backward. The claw seemed unmarred from the hit. Erik got up and turned.

“It has to be a Class D. Get to the tower, get help!” he ordered.

I dodged past a leg, and the crab tried to drop itself on me. Erik took the opportunity to crack one of its other legs with his hammer. It seemed to have more of an effect than hitting the claw, as the crab staggered. Running past, I spun to see more crabs crawling through the debris towards Erik. The large one shot a leg out, and another shockwave exploded when it connected, sending Erik flying.

From behind, I could see a good portion of the big crab’s shell, it seemed determined to keep its back away from Erik. It was covered in runes, but I noticed it rippling—less like a crab shell and more like…

It was a soft shell crab... or at least some of it was. I guess it made sense—a crab that big with a proper shell would weigh a ton.

I have an idea.

Was it my idea, or the magic again? Was there a difference? I really needed to learn more about these things.

Looking once more towards the tower, I gave up any attempt to run for help.

I said I was making crab cakes.

This was my chance to prove I could handle this world, no matter how insane it got.

I was bleeding profusely and was pretty sure I had a broken rib, but sure, why not. This was an adventure, right? I ran towards the massive crab’s back and jumped onto it, slamming the broken end of the sledge’s handle into the soft shell. The creature screamed, and my ears rang.

It tried to shake me off, but I had just enough of a handhold with the hammer to hang on. It would have to fall backward and crush me, and it didn’t seem keen on that. Blue mist erupted from it like a fog machine. I could barely see anything in front of me. Climbing further up the flailing creature with my makeshift climbing pick, I managed to create a hole big enough to get my hands in. I grabbed and tore it open, runes all over its body dimming or winking out completely as I broke the circuit. Reaching into my pocket, I grabbed everything—three lantern orbs and a mana pearl.

This was going to hurt.

I lit the orbs up with infrared, feeling my skin burn as I struggled to drop them into the hole in its shell. Once they were in, they sank into its fleshy insides incredibly fast with a loud sizzle and popping sounds. Smoke and steam billowed out of the hole, and the creature slammed itself against a wall, taking me with it. I was pretty sure my collarbone snapped with the impact, and I slid down the wall into a sitting position. I could sense the orbs inside the crab, burning with the intensity of the sun. I could feel the mana pearl helping to feed them power, but it wasn’t enough. They were drawing something from me. Fast. Too much. Panic surged in my chest—I wasn’t sure how much more I could take. My body felt like it was on fire.

It was like they were ripping through me to get at something else inside. The pain was immense but my whole body already hurt. It seemed distant while I watched the massive creature panic and struggle as steam escaped through every crack in its shell. I was delirious from the adrenaline-all I could think about was how delicious it smelled.

And then it exploded.

Green blood, guts, shell, and blue ooze erupted from the epicenter in quantities that didn’t seem to make sense. I was covered in it, and it stung my wounds. Large pieces of shell sliced into my arm, and I slid to the ground.

Everything went silent except for the pounding in my ears.

“This world sucks…”

My vision went black.