I didn't know where to go. Julianne wasn't answering her cell phone. She was probably out in the woods with zero reception. Daniel had basically told me I was on my own as far as he was concerned. Asking Kahina for anything was completely out after my stunt.

Evan was back in the depths of his forest. I could feel the familiar pull towards the north. My problem was getting there. Time was not one of the items Daniel implied was available in his note.

My pockets were still filled with the money from a few days ago. That wasn’t enough to get up to the Pack woods. A half hour south on the freeway would get me home. From there it would be easier to find someone for a ride. Or, heaven help me, pay for it with money squirreled away in my basement. The thought of doing so made me physically ill.

I caught a cab south to the bar and my apartment building. Someone had to be able to give me a lift. If it wasn't for my massive irritation with cars I might drive myself, but I also needed to know how to drive.

My apartment across the parking lot had more than a few people stationed outside. Mostly they were in cars. A people few wandered the hallways that were certainly not my neighbor's. Probably Daniel's partners in crime watching out for me. The bar wasn't off limits, but home clearly was. That...that was frustrating. My mind couldn't even think of a good curse for it.

By the time I walked in the bar my irritation level was riding high. It must have shown on my face. The entire place was closing for the morning. A few moments passed and one of the waitresses decided to see what I needed. The same one whose name I could never remember. Black hair that looked like it was chewed on one end. She wasn't wearing a name tag.

"Need something, Jay?" She asked.

"I don't know."

"Only got drinks for you, no work tonight. Julianne’s out of the area." The woman plucked at a thread of hair and studied it for a moment before looking back to me.

"Don't need drinks." Hell, I wanted one desperately.

"Really?" Her tone was tainted by a sarcastic drawl.

"Really. I need a ride."

"Don't have those either." She said.

I nodded and looked around the bar for anyone who seemed familiar. There had to be someone with a set of wheels and time. Not that I had much money to pay with. All sources of extra cash were firmly locked away in the apartment I couldn't get into. Back out on the curb I sat when both hands pressed against the sides of my head. Fingers traced through short hair trying to find purchase.

"Fuck!" I exclaimed.

The street was sparse and still someone was close enough to laugh at me. Feminine and dainty amusement echoed around. I rubbed my face with a hand to try press away any sense of exhaustion. My thoughts weren't clear. I had fought with Daniel’s people, twice, been tossed around by a little girl, and done who knows what on the way out of Kahina’s mansion. I should be sleeping it off. Resting, but home wasn't an option since it might blow up.

"Horse shit," I muttered

"Not as good as the word before it." The voice standing above me Candy. She was staring down. Her glasses were gone which allowed all the world to see those tattoos that spiraled around her eyes and down behind the nape of her neck.

Not that I officially knew how far they went. It was easier to see them with the shirt she was wearing. It hung off to one side revealing a shoulder. The rest of the fabric was a white that looked extremely thin. The view was interesting from this angle but not what I was wanted right now. I didn't even have a bed to take a woman back to anyway. Not to mention Kahina's stake of claim.

"You wouldn't happen to be available for a few hours would you?" Here I was asking for help from an elf that explained how everyone like me was killed by her kind. But I needed transportation to the woods.

"Oh for you, I'm sure I could spare at least three hours." Her mind was clearly in a different place than mine. Now wasn’t a good time for games with words.

"I need a ride north," I muttered.

"I need a ride too." Her words were sultry. There was something in her tone that spoke of borderline desperation.

"In a car." I tried to steer the conversation back to safe ground. My hand waved out at the parking lot full of vehicles.

"I can go for a ride in a car." She responded. Where was that buried girl who was serious when she needed to be? It was hard to tell, normally when I saw her, there was an air of deliberate playfulness.

"Never mind."

"Why not? I liked where this was going." The elf sat down next to me. There was a hint of ornate wood lacing around one ear from a fancy earring.

"Where's the other elf? The one that comes here for that weird drink, counting out all that change every single time like he's having a fit. The one you're sleeping with, maybe he can help me." I was babbling now.

There was a moment of silence where I looked back up. Her face was stone as she glared down at me, through me.

"What did you say?" She said.

"Which part?" Desperation had addled my brain. This entire time my gaze was facing towards the place I called home where people stood guard with their little explosives.

"All of it." Candy asked.

"You, Umbrella Beer the Quick, going at it." I waved an arm in the air and ignored all the warning signs once again. Something about women and me communicating always seemed doomed to failure.

"What?" Her foot stomped and a cloth purse clanked. Hell. Officially I knew nothing about his bedroom prowess.

"He looks like minuteman." I lamely tried to cover up my glaring mistake. Her face didn't change an iota from its steamed look. Another attempt was made to distract her. "Are you good with illusions?”

It was a rash change of topic, but it got my mind back in the correct direction. Maybe she was like Evan and could get me in my house. If I could get inside then maybe I could get money. If I could get money I'd grab a cab north. Not that I wanted to spend any of it, but there was enough in the downstairs of my apartment for a cab ride.

"Who exactly have you been talking to, Jeff?" Candy didn't know my real name.

"Told you. You're not the only elf I know."

"Are you talking about the conversation we had a few days ago? The one about the elf in supposed withdrawals?"

"He's not under anymore. We figured it out. Thanks by the way." I stood up. Damage from the last few days made everything ache. Maybe it was just that I had my rear planted on cold concrete.

Her eyes were getting wide. "Oh, shit." Candy uttered. "Please tell me you're not. Please. Please tell me."

"Not what?"

"I thought it was just a joke, I had hoped it was." What was a joke? "I, I just couldn't believe that you, you're cute and all but nothing special."

"What are you talking about?" I let the cute commentary slide by and tried to focus.

"The elf you mentioned, you asked if we'd called anyone Lord, did he call you Lord?" Candy reached out a hand and touched the side of my arm. A moment ago and it might have been taken in a completely different light, but now, now she was worried about something.

"Why would that matter?" I slowly asked. Maybe information could be pried out of her before talking to Evan. Then he could skip straight to handing out whatever was left of Arnold Regious and everyone could go home happy.

"It does. It's very important." Candy said.

"What are your Lords? Why does it matter?"

The tale has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

"Oh no, no, they did. What did you do, Jeff? What did you do?" Her eyes managed to get even wider. Then her eyes started that flickering collision of colors. Like a kaleidoscope going off.

Her hand didn't move though from my arm. Finally, after her muttering stopped and her eyes glazed over a milky white. I stood there waiting for some sort of sign as to what was going on. What was she doing? What was she seeing?

I saw her throat gulp.

"No. No."

"Answer me, Jeff, answer me. I'll give you any favor you want. Did the other elf call you Lord?"

"Two favors, Candy." For once I had the upper hand with an elf. This day would go down in history as a true feat.

"Fuck." She nodded. "I can't ignore this anymore. I had hoped I could."

"Two things, Candy, before I answer."

"What?" Her hand was still on my shoulder, and it felt startlingly warm.

"Silence and a ride."

"I'm not one to remain silent while riding." Her face smiled for the briefest moment. "But that's not what you mean. Yes, I wouldn't dare tell anyone else about this conversation. But you need to promise me something as well."

"What?" I asked.

She looked hurt for a moment. "Sorry, you need to agree first."

"Agree to pay the unknown price first, right?" I confirmed the deal with her. We had this conversation once before a few days ago. Candy nodded. "Can I at least know how big a price you'll ask me for?"

"The price won't be more than the worth of the request." She said. Her fingers couldn’t even make it halfway around my upper arm, but still she hung on.

A three-hour drive, on an hourly rate? That wasn't bad at all. Silence might be a bit more pricey. My secret was unlikely to be the only one she had gained over time. Another may not mean that much to her. I honestly couldn’t figure out how this Lord thing was such a big deal to anyone but me.

"Fine. I agree. I'll answer your question for silence and a lift north to Caesars Junction." I could find my way from there.

"Promise?"

"Sure."

"Done."

"Your favor?" I wanted to know what her other request was beside me answering a question.

"If you're going to meet this other elf, you need to allow me to meet him first."

"Alright." I didn't see a problem with it. It wasn't like they'd get into a cat fight. Maybe she was just shopping for a new boyfriend, or trying to see how many people knew about this little Lord thing.

"Good, and the answer to my question?"

I took a breath slowly and let it out.

"Yes. He called me his Lord."

"Anything else?"

I shook my head back and forth slowly.

"I don't want to dig myself a deeper hole here, Candy."

"Did he say anything about you laying claim?"

No, he hadn't said it, but that was exactly how I'd tracked him. Evan said I'd called him. My frozen posture must have indicated more than I might like. She didn't press it, having a more than clear enough answer on the subject. I wanted to ask her what exactly it meant, why she seemed upset. At least she hadn't clammed up and walked off.

"Come on." She motioned me to the parking lot.

I eyed the guards standing rather obviously outside the building. They stared back with passive faces. From the looks of it, they seemed to have more than enough confidence that I'd stay on my side of the security gate.

Candy's car beeped as an alarm disabled, then doors unlocked.

"I thought elves didn't like Iron." It was hard not to phrase my statement as a question.

"You'd be amazed what they can make cars out of nowadays. Enough layers and some of the best-padded seats money can buy." She smiled as the playful persona came back into control. "They're very comfortable."

At least I got to sit in the passenger seat this time. She was right too, the seats were extremely comfortable. Soft leather, carefully maintained. It was beautiful inside, and that wasn't a phrase I used lightly when talking about cars. I'd 'recovered' some fine ones, with help, over the years.

Candy seemed focused on something else entirely as we headed north. She didn't even ask where we were headed, Caesars Junction must have been an obvious enough location. I didn't expect a hotel to be something she just knew about. An hour down the road some thoughts I'd been mulling over made me risk asking a question.

"Candy?"

She gave a happy hum but didn't look over.

"I thought elves only had one addiction?"

"Are you willing to pay the price for that question?" Her tone was suggestive.

"That's exactly what I mean. You seem to be rather...physically oriented." Even though I was nothing special by her words. "And you have that thing with the questions."

"I can answer it, but there's a price, you'll have to pay it now, though." The last two questions did haven't overwhelmingly bad prices, so maybe they weren't a thing to worry about.

"Sure, I guess."

"Promise?" She said.

"I promise to pay whatever price you ask." Since I wasn't afraid of more questions at this point. She already knew one of the few little secrets I had, and it was only a secret for the last few weeks.

"Deal then." She kept driving for a few more minutes before speaking again.

"So?"

"One is for pleasure, the other is a means to an end, both are misdirection."

"What? Which is which?"

"That's your answer. Now I believe you owe me something in return."

"Sure." I was ready for anything she'd ask me.

"Well, Jeff, since I'm giving you a three-hour ride north." She had a grin on her face that looked far too pleased with itself. "I believe you owe me a three-hour ride in exchange." Her voice carried every ounce of huskiness you might expect with that kind of comment.

I blanched for a moment.

"I'm kind of seeing an old girlfriend." Kind of not sure what to think about her. I was smart enough to know sleeping with another woman wouldn't go over well.

Someone would end up dead. I could hear Candy flicking on the turn signal and pulling off the highway onto a dangerously quiet little road.

"Did I ask if you were otherwise engaged?"

"No." The car had stopped and her seat belt came undone.

"Did you promise to pay my price in return for an answer?"

"Yes, but..." I didn't want to have to explain this.

"A deal is a deal, Jeff, besides, you'll enjoy paying up." Then she was too close, and all I could see was the smile on her lips as she leaned into me. What would Kahina think? But it's not like we were actually together, right? After all, I had promised, and Kahina only thought of me as a glorified blood bank. That much was proven by her actions back at Julianne’s. And our conversation back at Kahina’s little mansion? It was hard to say how much I believed that.

I saw Candy slip her shirt off with an expert pull. Then a moment later she'd unbuckled her pants and started in on mine. She wasted no time on foreplay, and it'd been so long that my body didn't mind skipping it either. The most she stopped to do was pull out a thin blanket of some sort from behind one of the seats. She positioned it under my hips and took the moment to pull my pants the rest of the way down.

My brain didn't have too much more room for following that line of thinking. The press of her skin and the little moans coming out were very demanding. My last coherent thought, before a year or so of celibacy caught up with me, was how bad this would get if Kahina ever found out.