Masami found herself in a grassy field that stretched to the horizon in every direction. A cool breeze stirred the bright green blades and rustled her hair. The sky overhead was cloudless, and the sun was perched directly overhead. Masami took a step forward. The grass parted, and she noticed she was barefoot. Far off in the distance, she saw a group of figures standing together. Seeing nothing else of interest, she began to walk towards them. Something felt off about her gait. Too light. She looked to her left, down at her shoulder, only to see that there was nothing there. Her entire left arm was simply missing. Where her shoulder had been, now there was a smooth patch of skin. She placed her right palm over it, felt around it, squeezed the flesh to convince herself she was only seeing things. But there really was nothing there. Suddenly feeling panicked, she picked up her pace, beginning to jog towards the distant people.
As she approached, she began to recognize them. Kohaku was there, their hair unmistakable in the bright midday sun. Toshiro and Yasuko stood beside them, as did Takeo, Kaiya, Toshiro’s grandmother, and several more of Masami’s neighbors. Kohaku waved to her as she ran. But something seemed wrong. Their smile was slightly too wide, their proportions stretched in strange ways. The more she looked, the more she noticed. All of the people before her were warped in similar ways, pulled or twisted into caricatures of themselves.
The hair on the back of her neck began to raise. Something cold brushed against her back. Looking back, she saw a terrible void yawning behind her. The blackness rushed up to meet her, and soon it had engulfed her. She stood now in darkness, surrounded by her friends and neighbors. Kohaku stood directly before her, but their face was even more wrong. It morphed before her eyes, at first into Satoshi’s face, then into something more twisted. She watched in horror as Kohaku stretched and grew, becoming a hulking demon. She screamed, but no sound came out, so instead she fell to her knees. All around her, everyone she cared for in the world started to twist in the same way, until she was surrounded by a monstrous horde.
Then they all began to burn away from the inside. One by one, they were reduced to ash by fires lit from within. As they disintegrated, Masami could hear them calling to her, pleading for help. Kohaku was the last to fade before her. As tears poured down her face, they snarled “why did you leave? Why didn’t you save me, little one? Did I mean so little to you?” She tried to reach out to them, tried to respond, but they were already gone. And then she was alone. The darkness receded, revealing the field from before, burnt and barren. The sun which had been pleasantly warm before was now bleak and harsh as it beat down on her back. She curled into a ball on the cracked earth and sobbed.
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Toshiro gasped for air as he carved through yet another demon. He had lost count of how many he’d felled. All he knew was that every muscle in his body ached, and that there was seemingly no end to the monsters. A pair of oni charged him next. It was all he could do to raise his sword and ward off the first one’s club. The second caught him squarely in the chest. He felt his ribs crack as the blow lifted him off the ground and sent him sailing through the air. He hit the ground hard. Despite it all he still tried to get back to his feet, but his body would not obey him. His vision blurred as he lay there on his back, trying to catch his breath.
A figure wearing a samurai’s robes appeared over him. He spoke, and Toshiro thought he distantly recognized the voice.
“Get up.”
“I can’t!”
“Then you are less than worthless. Go home, boy.”
The man drew his sword and plunged it through Toshiro’s chest. His first instinct was to scream, but he felt no pain. As the man withdrew the sword from him, he noticed the markings on the end of the hilt. They were the same as the markings on his katana. The man turned to walk away, and Toshiro saw the back of his robes. They bore the mark of Lord Kanishiro, the lord his father had been bound to. He called out, but the man did not reply. He was beset by more demons before long. His blade cleaved effortlessly through them. Toshiro watched in awe as the steel flashed through the air, cutting down one nightmare after the other.
The man waded further into the horde, until Toshiro could no longer see him. Left alone, he could do nothing but lie there. He closed his eyes for what felt like only a moment. When he opened them again, he was lying in his bed back at home. Chickens clucked outside, and he could hear his grandmother calling his name. He tried to get up, but his limbs still refused to cooperate. Suddenly he heard Masami yell “Toshiro you useless boy! Get up!” He gritted his teeth, enraged, but still he could not force himself to rise. Then Yasuko burst into his room and knelt next to him. She whispered in his ear “Toshiro, you must get up. We need your help, Toshiro.”
“But I can’t! My legs won’t move” he cried.
“Then you truly are less than worthless. Goodbye, Toshiro.”
She sneered as she left. Toshiro did not even try to call to her. He knew there was nothing he could do to stop her from leaving him.
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Yasuko felt a terrible knot in her stomach. She was walking the road back to Ichinomiya, towards her destroyed home, where the dozens of survivors would be waiting for her to bring back aid from Kurume. But she had failed them, and was returning empty-handed. She could already picture their faces, the looks of disdain and disappointment. Of course the cursed girl had failed us, they would say. How foolish of us to send her. Takeo’s reaction would be worst of all. He would not yell or admonish her. No, he would simply give a slight frown and a curt nod, and wave her along. But she knew he would hate her for her failure. All of them would. Even Toshiro, for all his kindness, would someday find out the kind of person she was, and then he would hate her too.
She had already resigned herself to that fate, though. The walk had given her ample time to come to terms with it. She would simply nod and bear the ill will of all of them and do her part to rebuild the town. Then, when it was complete and stable once again, she would leave. The woods were large enough that she could keep herself away from everyone, and then she would never have to fail anyone again. It was for the best. She closed her eyes for a moment, and against the blackness she saw a vision of herself, old and alone, hunched over in a makeshift shack. Her older self shivered in the cold. Yes, this was what her future had always been. But she was at peace with it, for a part of her had known this all her life. After all, what good was she to anyone?
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The vision skipped forward. She was truly ancient now, older than anyone she had ever known. Her bones creaked as she slipped into her low, uncomfortable bed. Even the fire in the small hearth seemed to shy away from her. She slipped into a shallow sleep, her body slowly stilling. The vision lasted for what felt like hours. After some time, Yasuko realized she had died in that bed, cold, empty, and dreadfully lonely. She opened her eyes to see that she had reached the edge of town. With bitter conviction, she strode towards the crater in the center of town, ready to begin the path fate had laid out for her.
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Suki’s tails swished as she watched the three travelers toss and turn in their sleep. The tea was taking effect, of that she was sure. This was the part she hated though. It was never pleasant to watch a person writhe as they fought the impurities in their souls. She had avoided ever using the tea herself, but if what she had been told was true, it was an awful experience, and one that could break a person’s spirit if they were not strong enough. Still, it was the only way to purge them of the demonsmoke and get them to wake back up. She kept a close eye on the older woman in particular. Her demon arm was not moving at all, which Suki thought was odd. She wondered whether the tea had killed it. That would be for the best, she mused.
As if on cue, the older woman’s eyes opened as she took a gulp of air. Suki leapt over to her, flashing a grin full of sharp, canine teeth. The woman, who had looked ready to burst into tears moments before, bolted up, reaching to her hips where she had worn a katana. Suki had had the foresight to set it aside, though. This was not an uncommon reaction after all.
“Hey now! There’s no need for that. You’re safe. If I’d wanted to hurt you, I would’ve done it while you were asleep. Sorry about the dreams, I know they’re pretty rough. I’m Suki, by the way.” She put on her most soothing voice, warm and purring. Humans normally liked that.
The woman stared back at her with cold, calculating eyes. “And I’m awake now?”
Suki nodded vigorously in reply. “Yep! Good as new, my dear!”
“How am I supposed to know this isn’t another dream?” The woman reached up to massage her left shoulder, seeming relieved. “I’ve had my fair share of vivid ones, you know.”
Suki shrugged. “C’mon, does this seem like a dream? It’s a pretty boring one if it is. You three have been out for ages! Do you have any idea how dull it is to watch sleeping people?”
“Whatever. I guess time will tell. Suki, was it? I’m Masami. My friends there are Toshiro and Yasuko. We’re...well, I don’t know what you’d call us. Travelers, maybe.”
“That explains the blankets and food and stuff. You three seemed pretty well-prepared for the wilderness. But not for the demonsmoke.”
“Demonsmoke?”
“The black rain.” Suki chuckled playfully. “You really shouldn’t stay out in that stuff for too long, you know. It’s dreadfully toxic for you humans. You’re lucky I happened to be in the area, or you might never have woken back up!”
“Ah.” Masami frowned at this, not sure what to make of the fox-tailed girl who sat before her. “Thanks, then.”
“Mhm! It’s no trouble, really. You just made my day all that much more exciting!”
“Us humans, you said. Then I wasn’t hallucinating the tails?”
Suki curled one of her tails into her lap and patted it. “Nope! Completely real, and just as soft as they look.”
Masami laughed. “Right. Of course. We’re under the care of a kitsune. Gods above it’s been a weird few weeks. My apologies for the wary response, Suki. I’ve had too many close calls recently not to be on my guard when I wake up in a strange place.”
“No offense taken, Masami. And what a fitting name you have, if I may say.”
“I...yeah. In more ways than one.”
Suki nodded. “It suits your soul. Ah, look! They’re starting to wake up too.”
Sure enough, Toshiro and Yasuko had both stopped tossing in their sleep. Toshiro sat up, bleary-eyed. He croaked out “Yasuko? Masami?”
Yasuko did not rise as she opened her eyes. She saw Toshiro next to her and put her hand over his. He squeezed it and smiled back down at her.
“Oh, Yasuko. Thank the gods, it was all just a dream...”
Masami looked back to Suki. “Them too?”
Suki nodded. “I’m afraid so. The tea purges impurities, which is why I used it to rid you of the demonsmoke, but it, ah, doesn’t distinguish about which impurities it needs to purge. So the dreams tend to show you your fears. I really am sorry. If there had been another way to help, I would’ve used it instead.”
“Not your fault.” Masami gave Toshiro and Yasuko an apologetic look. “I’m so sorry you two. If yours were anything like mine...well. You shouldn’t have been made to go through that. I’ll be more careful next time. You’ll never have to face anything like that ever again, I promise.”
“I am not so sure,” Yasuko murmured. “All I was shown is what I already knew to be true.” She felt Toshiro pull himself closer to her.
“C’mon, Yasuko. You heard - uh, the fox lady? Okay, that’s a question for later. You heard her, though, right? Purging impurities. The dreams were just us confronting fears. It wasn’t real.” His voice was warm as he spoke to her.
“But the fact that I could not secure aid from Kurume is real. In fact, reality is worse than that dream. At least I was heading home to help in it.” She turned her face from Toshiro, staring at the stones nearby. “I really did fail.”
“Hey now. That’s not true at all. You saved countless people from that crazy Kubo guy. He was a demon too, there was no way he’d have sent aid, no matter what you said to him. It’s not your fault. You did the best you could. I’m sure everyone in Ichinomiya would be proud of you for what you did in Kurume, especially your teacher. I mean seriously, if that doesn’t impress him, nothing could.”
Yasuko bit the insides of her cheeks as she pulled her hand away from Toshiro’s. He didn’t mean any of it, of course. So why was he saying it? “You do not have to lie to me, Toshiro. I can face reality.”
She felt him put his arm over hers as he laid back down next to her. “Yasuko, what are you talking about? I wouldn’t lie to you, ever. Seriously, you’re scaring me here. What’s going on? What did that dream show you?”
She gave no reply. For all that she knew she should warn him away, she could not bear to give up the warmth of his arms. So she let him hold her. After all, why not enjoy a few ill-deserved moments of happiness while she could?
Masami had begun to help Suki set up a proper camp for the night, though she glanced over at Toshiro and Yasuko from time to time. Huh. I guess Toshiro didn’t need to find his Kohaku after all. He needed to be them for someone else.