I wake up with a headache… I’m not sure what it’s from, since it’s not like I hit my head this time.

Maybe some more water will fix it…

Wait, what am I thinking? I don’t need water. I’m on a new planet. I must be experiencing gravity sickness! That means I need fruit!

Alright, mission accepted. Meet tree, acquire fruit.

I go to sit up, but something heavy is in my lap. Looking down, I realize that Seela is passed out, completely limp, with her head in my lap. Her big, curly brown hair is full of frizz and knots. Her mouth is wide open, with a small stream of drool trailing down my thigh. An absolute epitome of sophistication lies peacefully in my lap. I want to wake her up and begin our adventure on this new planet, but I’m not sure that I want this moment to end.

Wait, I could be having even more moments like this, with no headache!

I gently shake her shoulder. She doesn’t react.

“Hey, wakey wakey,” I tell her.

Not moving, she grumbles something that does not sound like words.

“Let’s go explore, come on!” I shake her a little harder.

“Shut up,” she groans, rolling down my leg. When she gets to my knee, her eyes snap open, and she quickly sits up, red in the face.

“Ready to go?” I ask her.

“Uh, yeah, give me a second,” she wipes the drool off of her face, not making eye contact, and goes into her crate.

I wipe the drool off of my leg, and go into my crate as well. Once I’ve changed my clothes and my bag is packed with the jar of water and some of the meat and liver we dried over the fire last night, I look again at Seela. She’s changed into a fresh, sand-colored sarong held into place with her belt, which has two harpoons and rope attached. On top, she wears a matching piece of cloth that she’s wrapped around her back, over her chest, around her neck, back over her chest, and back around her back, and tied in the front. I guess that would be the easiest way to wear clothes when you have giant wings. Finally, she’s tying an even smaller piece of cloth around her hair, covering the top of her head and keeping her frizzy hair out of her face. As she does this, I hear her mutter under her breath about how dry the air here is.

“All set?” I ask her.

“Not yet, one more thing,” she says without looking at me, while she picks up the horned skull of one of last night’s rabbits, “this one is just too pretty to only keep the teeth.”

She sits with it on the ground, and using her talons, drills two holes into the skull. Then she goes back into her crate, and takes out some string, which she threads through the skull, and ties it around her neck.

With a satisfied smile, she says “Now I’m ready.”

Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.

~~~

“I know they seem like a lot of fun, but there’s a lot of them,” Seela says, carrying me through the air by some rope we tied into a harness around me, “are you sure you want to ask them for directions?”

“I don’t see any reason not to!” I reply, as the group of loud people get closer, larger, and louder.

As we get closer to them, I can make out the figures a lot more easily. There’s about thirty of them. Half of them are catlike in appearance, a little taller than me, almost completely black, have long, thin, pointed ears on the tops of their heads, and long tails with spines all over them, not unlike the branches that had the water in them. Among the other half are lizard-looking people, who come up to the cat peoples’ waists and have black and brown stripes along their bodies and bright blue tails, black pig-looking people who are not as tall as Flo or Chris and have snouts that curve slightly downward, a couple of large, tortoise people, and one person who just looks like a vaguely person-shaped, shiny, black… liquid?

They stop their activities and turn to us as we descend in their direction. Many of them were working together to build various devices. Some of the devices are big, and have wheels. Some are small, long, and sharp, with lots of blades. I don’t know what any of these are supposed to do, but they look really big and intimidating.

The largest of the catlike people comes forward to greet us as we land. She’s wearing lots of big, chunky blue stones, around her neck, up her arms, on her fingers. There are holes in her ears where metal hoops with the blue rocks attached to them sit.

“It’s been a while since we’ve had visitors! Welcome!” she outstretches her arms with a big, toothy smile, and the people behind her cheer in welcome.

“Hi!” I step forward, “We’re looking for the world tree. Do you know where it is?”

There’s a sea of murmurs behind boss cat lady, but her smile doesn’t fade.

“We can take you there! But first,” she says, bringing silence among the people behind her, “we want to play a game.”

“What kind of game?”

Her smile widens, almost creepily.

“We’ll get to that. What’s important are the terms,” she says.

“Well okay, what are the terms?”

“If you win,” she explains, “we will do what we can to ensure that you thrive on this planet.”

Well that seems nice of them!

“But if we win,” her smile gets even wider somehow, like she’s trying to hold herself back, “we can do whatever we want with you before you die.”

Wow! Never mind! That’s horrifying! I don’t like this one bit! I suppose now I just politely decline, and then Seela and I can be on our way. Yeah, that sounds like a plan-

“We accept your terms,” declares Seela, stepping forward, chest puffed out.

Damn it Seela, you beautiful, beautiful psychopath.

“Oh-ho-ho! Now that’s the enthusiasm we like to see!” says boss cat lady, as cheering and whooping erupts behind her.

“And just so you know,” Seela takes another step forward, “we aren’t here to make friends. We fully intend to win so hard, you’ll rue the day you challenged us!”

Please stop talking.

“Look everyone,” says another cat, who wears a brown leather hat with a wide brim, “bird brain here thinks she’s hot shit because she slayed a jackalope!”

Seela turns to them, leaning forward and shooting those intense eyes in their direction.

“Two of them!” she corrects, “At the same time!”

The crowd roars.

“Well, this should be interesting,” the boss cat lady says, looking Seela up and down, and then turning her eyes to me, “and what about you?”

Before I can say anything, Seela puts a long wing around my shoulders. I feel so safe here.

“This is Hana, my fearless yet humble Captain!” Seela shouts.

I feel much less safe.

Seela continues, “She’s indestructible! Not even my harpoons can pierce her tough skin!”

Why must she do these things?

The boss cat lady laughs.

“Sounds like today’s game will put that to the test! Everybody!” she turns to the crowd, “Prepare the carts! We’re having a joust!”

There’s a second of the loudest cheering yet, before the crowd disperses in all directions, making the preparations as they were ordered to.

I look down at the harness around my chest.

What have I just been literally roped into?