Bo was caught by surprise at her question before catching the challenging gleam on her face. Not a few minutes ago, he’d have been in a panic but the Bo of right now was happy to argue with his friend again.
“The Gym Leader will be yours truly,” he said, shooting her a cocky smirk that would have made Angel proud. Luckily, it just elicited a raised eye and responding smirk.
“Oh really? So I take it we’d be running this whole thing out of the old Moon clan hometown, eh? I’d be trading in a sunny paradise where hard-bodies think tank tops and going shirtless is business casual for what exactly?”
“We have a magical lake where fairies gather to dance during full moons?” He couldn’t quite help it from coming out like a question towards the end.
“I grew up in Ballonlea. It’s literally a glowing forest full of dancing fairies at all times. Parents had to do headcounts once an hour to make sure a fairy didn’t wander off with one of the kids.”
“Mt. Moon is a natural wonder.”
“So is Mt. Hokulani. It even has Clefairy there.”
“We have the best Clefairy. Also, we’ve got a seriously good ramen joint.”
“Debatable and Alola’s got Malasadas.”
“We already have a Gym facility built inside the village.”
“Is that the one you accidentally sold to terrorists?”
“No, we accidentally let it get repo’d by terrorists because of a legally binding contract we signed with them. Not important though. Carmine Village has my crazy grandpa. You love the Old Man.”
“Yes I do, but if I was going to move for crazy geezers, I’d hit up Opal and Mustard. They’re at least as crazy as the old man.” Oh, it was on now.
“Nobody is as crazy as Old Man Moon. He once made me chase around Spearow, butt-naked at two in the morning. Apparently it was supposed to be ethics training, but that’s beside the point. It was still one-hundred percent, Zubat-shit crazy. And it’s not just him. The Moon clan settled Carmine Village on the back half of Mt. Moon where just about no one sane ever goes and no one sane lives. It’s an entire village of outcasts, riffraff, and scavengers that you’re going to either hate that you love or love to hate. Best of all, it’s in Kanto, the true origin of Legendary trainer culture. Times might have changed a little, but we know how to raise trainers right there.”
“Is that so,” she laughed wildly at his boasts before knocking back the last of her drink. At some point, Joy had refilled both of their glasses. Bo thought they had determined that that was her… third, yeah third. “Well if that’s how it is, I guess we just got to battle for it. Best trainer gets to be Gym Leader. If you somehow win, we stomp that tournament and open up a Gym in the back-end of nowhere you call home, and when I win, we sweep the tournament and set up my Gym in the Whirl Islands.”
“Oh hell no,” stated Bartender Joy, rapidly waving her arm in the space between their faces. She even somehow manipulated her aura to use Double Team for dramatic effect. “You drunk idiots are not battling tonight.”
“Don’t worry, we’re real good at battling Joy,” cheered Bo happily. He hadn’t battled Dani since before the Ever Grande Conference and he could feel his team roaring in anticipation at the idea. Well, most of them that is. The one resting aura around his neck did remind him of something. “I can only do up to four-on-four though. I’ve got two new pokemon still in training with me. Fay’s got a little more growing to do before any serious battling and Saber’s still a touch wild. They’re in that phase where they think of me more of as a fun playmate instead of a trainer.”
“That describes just about all of your pokemon, mate,” she shot back while leaning forward slightly. Bo felt her aura brush out against his neck as she looked over the capsules hanging there. She lightly scanned over Angel’s empty Moon Ball, Baron’s own Moon Ball, and Gizmo & Princess’ Love Balls before reaching Fay’s Luxury Ball. As was typical of her, Fay preened at the attention of someone new while still repeatedly pulling at Bo’s own spirit as well. “Hmm, I know Astra and Huntress have the kids, but I’d have at least expected Storm.”
“Nah, he wanted to get back and start training as soon as he heard the news. I haven’t had an ace level battle in a whole month so the battle hungry maniac is worried he’s gotten rusty. He’ll kick himself silly once he realizes he missed out on fighting Warrior though.”
Dani seemed to chuckle at imagining the sulking face of Bo’s most serious-minded battler. The rest of his team might love battling but Storm was the only one who pursued strength so purely for its own sake. As Dani’s focus finally drifted over to Saber, he fully expected his newest Pokemon to remain asleep but no sooner had an unfamiliar aura skimmed their resting place, Saber’s spirit sprang into action.
Bo was used to it by now but still flashed a chagrined glance as Dani and even Bartender Joy jerked back in response. Saber’s aura stabbed out at the room not unlike a cloud of razors. Meanwhile, the Dusk Ball holding them began rattling in place as its occupant decided they wanted to explore their new surroundings. Pushing his own aura past the hazardous energy emanating from the pokemon, Bo unclipped the ball from his necklace, switched it to its enlarged size and fiddled with the de-materialized Soothe Bell inside to calm Saber.
Before he could finish though, a hand clamped firmly over his wrist, locking it and the rattling ball in place. Looking up, Bo noticed his friend gazing seriously into his eyes with Brute and Witch hovering protectively over her shoulders. “Rainbow Moon,” she intoned flatly. “What in Arceus’ name did you do this time?”
“Oh relax,” he responded lightly, calm now that he knew what her concern was. “The Paldean League sort of knows I have them. I mean, they don’t know that I have them but they were okay with the concept of a trainer having Saber as long as I kept them in the ball or immediately sent them to another region. Had to have Saber hang out with Gramps for a while now, come to think of it. Complete overreaction really, Saber’s a total sweetie-pie.”
This didn’t seem to help the way he’d expected as Dani released his wrist in favor of groaning into both of her hands. Strangely enough, she actually looked even more worried at his last comment. Witch and Brute likewise seemed to increase their suspicion of the pokemon he was holding, though Witch seemed to be alternating looking at the ball and peering out the window in confusion. The party outside must be getting a little rowdy he mused. Once Dani finally lifted her head from her hands, she shot him an exasperated look.
“Skittles, that’s almost exactly how you describe the most uproarious mon irrationally known as Princess.” Her slightly profuse complaint caused Bo’s face to screw up in confusion.
“Exactly. Princess is a sweetheart. Her and Saber are great playmates.”
“Princess hates me,” Dani declared flatly, as though she hadn’t just said the most preposterous thing Bo had ever heard. “Don’t get me wrong, that’s better than how she feels about almost all other living lifeforms and all inanimate objects, but the fact that I can group those last two categories together says a lot.”
Bo’s mouth dropped open in shock, aghast at the sheer insanity of what she was saying. He could practically hear the cartoonish sound a crashing glass and aghast screaming. Even Brute and Witch were vigorously nodding their heads in complete agreement with his shock at her words. Finally getting his mouth closed, Bo rushed to reassure his dear friend whom he just now realized must be horrifically drunk.
“Princess loves you, Dani. You’re practically her mother. In fact, she was the most insistent on coming with me to bring you back to Kanto. It even took me a whole two hours to convince her that we couldn’t use force to bring you back if you said no. I mean; she was legitimately ready to just blast every square mile around you to smithereens in order to convince you to come back.”
“Oh, well that’s all good then,” Dani responded to his audible relief. “As long she thinks of me like the mother that abandoned her, jumps at the idea of attacking me, and thinks obliterating a highly populated area which I happen to be standing in is a good plan, I can’t believe I ever doubted her. Thank Arceus the quaking ball of destruction you’re currently holding is as sweet and compassionate as her.”
“Exactly!” Bo sat back in relief as a wide smile split his face. He had been really worried there for a second. This called for celebratory round before their battle. Turning back to where Bartender Joy stood behind the bar, he started to order before noticing that she had tuned out of their conversation and was gazing worriedly out the windows. Dani too noticed the Joy’s worry and turned towards the exit with a frown. Even Angel hopped off his stool to peer outside.
Outside the window, the group could see people running about erratically as they all seemed to try to flee in twelve directions at once. Bo had just a second to puzzle how the neglected lawn they were running over had gotten so green before a boom seemed to echo throughout the village, followed by the quaking ground. In a flash of sudden insight, Bo realized that the screams of horror he’d heard earlier hadn’t just been in his head. As one, all six of those inside the bar leaned forward further in an attempt to hear what they were saying.
This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.
“What the hell yo, this ain’t the freakin distortion world yo!”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’ll give Grandma the scooter back. I was just borrowing it, please!”
“Not my money, take them, just please don’t hurt my money!”
And then,
“TAPU BULU! RUNNNN!”
Bo unconsciously jerked back in shock. One of the Tapus was here? Like all Legendaries, the island guardians were reclusive figures that only came out for two reasons; boredom or a threat to the islands. A bored Tapu was generally pretty bad as relieving that boredom usually meant battering whatever challenger they first came across. A threatened Tapu was a disaster waiting to happen though. As was typical of most Legendary pokemon, their solution to threats tended to involve obliterating the threat and anything else around it.
A little after Bo and his friends had split ways, he’d heard that there had been some kind of upheaval in Alola. Apparently, it had even been enough to rile the Tapus into action. At the time, League officials had issued some statement about strange breeds of invasive pokemon from another region that were strong enough to draw the Tapus out, but that had been over a year ago. What could possibly –
Clack* Clack*
Looking down towards the bottom of the exit, Bo beheld a strange sight. He couldn’t quite place when it had happened, but at some point Saber’s ball had slipped from his hand and rolled towards the door. As he watched, the ball bounced once more off the closed door before immediately rolling around. Picking up speed, the ball launched itself off the ground in a futile effort to send itself through the closed door and to where Tapu Bulu was apparently wreaking havoc. As Saber repeated the process, Bo stiffly turned around, only to see four faces of varying shape share the same flat look as they stared at him. Angel clapped joyously at Saber’s antics while laughing. A cold shiver went down Bo’s spine as the previous warmth from the alcohol seemed to abandon him.
Clack* Clack* Clack*
Bo attempted to turn back to looking at Saber, but Bartender Joy reached out and roughly turned his face towards her.
“Rainbow, was it?” she asked with a sweet sounding voice. It would have been comforting if he hadn’t heard a similar type of voice coming from Emma often enough before. His concern deepened as her tone and cadence changed. “Why, Oh Why, do YOU think, a Tapu, might be HerE!”
“Ohhh,” he stalled as his eyes darted between his friend’s and her pokemons’ unsympathetic faces to Angel’s oblivious chuckling at Saber’s actions. “Yeaahhhh. That one might be my bad.”
“NooO?” Joy seemingly gasped in surprise as her bulging eyes tried to burn through him. “And wHat, pray TELL, are YOU, going to do about IT?”
Her words were a Thunderbolt running straight through him. She was right. He had brought an angry Legendary here. An angry, powerful, destructive Legendary. It was literally right outside and it was him and Saber it was looking for to fight. Barely a few months before, the news would have sent him into a catatonic stupor or running in fear. Now though, the gravity of the situation just bounced teasingly around his head. This was, that was, this is…
“THAT’S IT!” Bo yelled as he burst free from Joy’s grip. Rapidly, he turned to face a stunned Dani and gripped her shoulders in excitement. “That’s it, Dani! First one who beats Tapu Bulu gets to be Gym Leader!”
She stared at him, mouth agape as she processed his pronouncement. Perhaps, despite their conversation, she had still been expecting him to flee. Unwilling to risk her doubting him, Bo couldn’t help but look feverishly into her eyes until he saw his suggestion roll around her mind before landing. Like the sun breaking free from a cloud, a wild smile burst across Dani’s face.
“Yes! Yes, that is exactly what we are doing!” she yelled back at him enthusiastically. In response to her shout, Angel, Brute, and Witch cackled in excitement. Within his spirit, Bo felt the previously alarmed auras of his team ignite in joy. Seeing them so willing to selflessly jump in to help quell the Tapu, Bartender Joy seemed to regain a Joy’s typical concern for others as she tried to backtrack.
“What! No, don’t do that. You don’t need to do that. Just teleport the damn ball somewhere outside of town!”
“Don’t worry, we’re happy to do it. We’re fighting a Tapu, Bo!” Dani ignored Joy’s concern as she tightly gripped his own shoulders while laughing maniacally. “We are back, baby!”
Rushing outside, it didn’t take the duo long to spot the bovine-headed Tapu raging about. They just had to look at where the rapidly emerging jungle was spreading from as it started to overtake Po Town. Likewise, as Bo brought Saber’s ball out into the open, Tapu Bulu turned to glare at them and emitted a huffing challenge. It didn’t charge them like he expected, but Bo supposed that the Legendary was calmer now that it had spotted its query. Meanwhile, Angel, Brute, & Witch ringed around their trainers in loose preparation.
“Aight Skittles, how we doing this?” Dani asked as she unclipped one of the balls from where they lined her vest. “If you want, you can just sit there looking pretty while Demon gets his work out in.”
“Why thank you, kind lady, but I think Angel is looking to strut his stuff so you two can just relax.”
“Angel? No, no, no. If we’re doing this for the Gym Leader spot than it’s got to be type specific. No offense love.” She directed towards Witch after the willowy fairy started to nudge her. Dani further tilted her head in confusion as Witch’s eyes glowed. Not being too worried about what they were discussing, Bo pondered over what Dani has said before nodding agreeably and plucking a ball from his neck.
“No problem. Angel you sit back and protect against any rogue shots. Princess has been dying to see you anyways, Dani. As for how we do this, how’s about whoever lands the finishing blow wins?” he asked but received only silence in response. Turning, he saw that Dani’s face had screwed up in confusion and was looking around at the sky. “What’s up?”
“Witch says to look up, but I’m not sure what she’s… oh that,” she finished as three eerie figures appeared around the outskirts of the town. As the two looked on, Tapu Koko, Tapu Lele, & Tapu Fini closed in, and the four Tapu’s now surrounded them. Electricity and mist surged across the grassy terrain, while the air around them seemed to warp to their senses. Within the span of a few breathes, the formerly run down town had morphed into a child’s fever dream. “Well that explains why Tapu Bulu was waiting.”
“Yup. New plan then,” he began while gathering more pokeballs in his hands. They shook only slightly as adrenaline pounded through him. The presence of four Legendaries in all their glory, even relatively minor ones like the Tapus, were more than enough to bring echoing flashbacks and cause his heart to feel squeezed. Bo didn’t let that faze him though. He and Baron had spent too much time working past that particular trauma to stumble now. “They seem worried about Saber, but not in a rage or anything so we should still be good to fight. Angel and Witch protect us and the civilians running about while we get to brawling. Last team standing wins.”
“Works for me,” she answered, a wild smile returning to her face at the challenge they were facing.
As one, they each threw three balls into the air to release their teams. Whilst one of his pokeballs soared high into the air, two figures appeared around Bo. Baron’s prided black coat gleamed in the night, illuminated by the softly glowing rings around his body. The mon’s sleek face smirked haughtily out at the glowering Tapus. In comparison, Gizmo’s shadowy silhouette seemed to blend into the night, only identifiable due to her glimmering eyes and snickering voice.
Meanwhile, three muscled figures formed around Dani along with Brute. Demon roared loudly as the flames around his waist flared in anticipation, while Shogun emitted a screeching cry as he began sharpening his bladed figure. In comparison, Brave’s black and white robed form silently settled into a low martial artist’s stance.
“Alright then,” Bo yelled happily as the ball he threw into the air finally opened. Princess’s three heads rose high into the air as his adorable Hydreigon let loose a cheerful war-cry. “Let’s decide who’s going to be Indigo’s first dark type Gym Leader!”
*
‘I really should have taken Auntie’s offer on that residency in Shalour.’
While she waited for her call to be picked up, Bartender Joy could only muse in aloof horror at the spectacle taking place outside her bar. She had seen worse situations, working in disaster zones being a point of pride for most Joys, but this was definitely in the top five.
As she watched, the Hydreigon let loose another round of three searing Flash Cannons that Tapu Fini barely dodged by ducking in and out of the shifting mists. The attacks did manage to obliterate a pair of concession stands and some abandoned cars, though. Each flash of light seemed to instantly vaporize whatever it hit whilst cooking the air around them. The water type Tapu responded with a powerful Hydro Pump that the enraged dragon plowed through. Taking advantage of the Tapu’s distraction, the towering Urshifu slammed a powerful Poison Jab into the other Legendary’s center, sending it tumbling.
Meanwhile, the rooster headed Tapu Koko crashed through a nearby building in pursuit of the nimble Umbreon. Arcs of electricity scorched everything around them but couldn’t land on the dark type’s sable form. In response, the black dog seemed to relish in tormenting the fairy with quick pot shots before twisting away from the electric type’s charges. Flashes of light and shifting darkness danced all around them as the Tapu fruitlessly chased its foe. Joy felt a twinge of concern as the enraged Tapu finally seemed to corner the Umbreon, only for it pass through an illusion and crash into the waiting Brute. She really wasn’t sure how she should feel about watching the hairy troll brutalize what was effectively one of Alola’s most revered deities.
A high pitched snickering drew her attention to where Tapu Lele was being repeatedly harassed by the Sableye’s status moves. Every time the island guardian shook off one of the status effects, a new one replaced it. The area they were fighting in seemed to be entirely consumed by living fireballs, waves of lightning, and doppelgangers snickering in ethereal voices. Even if the fairy tried to get close to one of the living shadows, the Bisharp intercepted it with a series of Metal Claws and Iron Heads. The sword blade pokemon fighting there was clearly leagues above the one that had recently battled within the nearby stadium. It ruthlessly slashed and hacked with a precision fit for a career soldier while flowing between the Sableye’s moves like a dancer.
Lastly, the Incineroar’s Flare Blitz clashed explosively with Tapu Bulu’s Wood Hammer, the impact cratering the ground beneath them. The fire type might have been the only one fighting alone, but it’s Intimidate ability and typing were letting it hold its own. The flaming feline yowled with a demented glee as it met the angry deity blow for blow. Their clashes left a twisting tapestry of scorched earth and overgrown plant life in their wake. Joy winced as fire from another attack raced towards her bar, but a shimmering screen appeared in time to prevent the destruction from reaching her. The work of either the Clefable or Hatterene that had hung back, no doubt. As she watched, the Clefable swirled one of his fingers slightly and a trio of dazed and terrified pedestrians were swept up by psychic energy and sent flying out of the town. Hopefully, he would remember to put them down gently and not just assume they’d survive a crash landing.
Regardless, it looked like the two trainers would be able to hold out for a little while, but she wasn’t sure for how long. She was sure, however, that they were going to last long enough for this battle to do more than enough damage to Po Town, despite the two fairies’ best efforts. Joy was finally broken from her musing as the phone call connected.
“Sup. Is this important? A re-run of Starly & Clutch is on.”
‘Oh yes, I feel safer already now that Ula’ula’s esteemed Kahuna is on the line.’ Aloud though, Joy maintained a professional tone.
“Nanu, we have a situation in Po Town. That trainer you told me to look out for has some kind of pokemon on him that’s pissing off the Tapus, all of them. He and Dani Maven are currently fighting them in the middle of the town, drunk off their asses. I need you here to calm the Tapus down and then you need to get these morons off the islands as fast as possible.”
“Seriously? We already went through a fucking alien invasion without the Tapu’s destroying any settlements. How bad can this be?”
While he morosely tried to get out of working, Joy felt a chilling sensation pass through her. Whipping her head up, Bartender Joy was just in time to see Bo’s errant Dusk Ball finally snap open in a swirl of shadows. At first, she couldn’t quite make out what she was seeing. The pokemon looked vaguely like a broken Honedge, an ominous blade cracked in half and floating in the air, but a simple ghost type shouldn’t be enough to enrage the Tapus. It certainly wouldn’t explain the overwhelming feeling of cold and malice now shrouding the town.
As she watched, a flurry of ice & snow materialized and gathered around the blade. Soon, an enormous feline figure made of ice stood in the middle of Po Town and emitted a piercing roar at the gathered Tapus. While no louder than any of the other pokemons’ battle cries, the sound emitted by the strange beast seemed to slice deep into Bartender Joy’s consciousness, conjuring image after image of gruesome endings carried out by a blade. In response, her bar, which had remained undamaged up to that point, shattered around her as the windows cracked, counters split, and tables fell to pieces.
“Bad,” she answered dully as the new pokemon knocked the Incineroar to the side in order to pounce on Tapu Bulu, sending them both crashing through a series of nearby buildings. “Very bad.”