Luweth grabbed his shoulder with a worried expression.
“Are you alright? I know it’s a lot to take in, but-”
“I’m fine. Don’t worry.”
Liam’s voice had taken on a defeated edge. Luweth’s expression slightly changed before he sighed. He moved away and turned his gaze to the battlefield below. Liam recomposed himself.
It doesn’t mean there’s no way to avoid feeling like this.
The Primordial Essence was a power that allowed him to break the rules. As he continued to develop, maybe he could use it forcefully to bring his emotional state back to a human state. Either way, finding a path was up to him. He narrowed his eyes. In the blink of an eye, all humans below disappeared. Liam had sent all of them back to Zancorix. He turned his back on the battlefield as the planet below him disappeared alongside several others.
[Humanity has exterminated the Phyr.]
His heart trembled. It was indicative that he hadn’t gone over the edge just yet. There was still hope. He was still human. Liam grabbed Luweth’s arm and teleported them to Zancorix’s skies. The aged Vampire spoke.
“…That was very decisive. Are you sure?”
“My highest priority is still developing humanity, but now that I know that I’ll eventually stop feeling like a human, our plans are on another timer. As if my lifespan wasn’t enough, now there are issues that will happen as I’m still alive.”
Luweth nodded solemnly. Liam’s thoughts were simple. If the distance between himself and an ordinary human grew even more, he would be estranged from his own species. His own perspective would change, as would the view of humanity in general. If he stopped caring as much as he did about humanity, his plans and moves would change unintentionally. His goals would shift. At the same time, if humans stopped looking up to him as the prime example of a human, they would feel hopeless and alone, knowing that their strongest was unlike them. It was a situation with plenty of negative consequences for everyone involved.
Liam’s eyes burned with steeled determination. He needed to fix this, and fast.
Ulvir. How do I do it?
[There’s nothing to be done. It’s an unavoidable part of growing stronger in your case. You cannot circumvent it.]
He clicked his tongue. Ulvir didn’t know how to fix it. Even though she said that there was nothing that could be done, that wasn’t necessarily true. The Primordial Essence was as real as it was fictional. Ulvir’s perspective was similar to that of the Chaos beings. It didn’t perceive itself as incorrect and did nothing to change. Simply put, the closer one became to reality, the more one stopped caring about their own lack of feelings for the fictional characters. It was a perspective that Liam was gradually developing.
I need to do something while I still care about everyone else.
The change was already in progress. The very least he could do was slow it down.
“Luweth. Can you give me some time?”
The Vampire nodded.
“Sure, if that’s what you think you need. If you need me, you know where to find me.”
Luweth’s figure disappeared as he stepped through space. Liam crossed his legs and closed his eyes. All of his focus was turned to his Inner World. His soul stepped on the sea below it.
There was only one thing he could think of: his Will. He had no idea if it was possible to affect his very nature, but with a high enough Will, anything should be possible. It was the only method he managed to find. He would use his Will to forcefully stay human for as long as possible, even if it meant holding himself back.
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[That consists of nothing but halting your ascension.]
[If you do it, you will fail.]
Liam gritted his teeth. The endless voices emerged from the black sea underneath his soul’s feet.
I will not trade my humanity away for power. I will find a way to fulfill my objective as a human.
[We understand your decision.]
[It is our duty to tell you that it will not work.]
[In order to defeat the First Star, you must rise to their level.]
[The change in your perspective is a natural consequence.]
[By keeping it at bay, you will hinder your development as a whole.]
No. I’ll find a way. I need to.
For the first time, Liam disregarded the knowledge of the infinite Chaos beings. From the start, he had taken their advice as a matter of course. They transcended “reality” on an endless level. There was nothing they didn’t know. If they said it was impossible, then it really was. He couldn’t accept it. He would not discard his humanity.
He let down his soul’s defenses, withstanding the onslaught of the weight of the Chaos beings’ existence. As usual, the Primordial Essence supported his Inner World, allowing his Will to develop much faster than before. Liam could no longer be satisfied with just this. He pushed himself to his very limits and then further. Ulvir’s voice soon rang out in his mind.
[Stop. You will only damage yourself if you continue. It will have the opposite effect of what you’re trying to achieve.]
Liam’s soul clenched its fists and looked down. When it raised its head, its eyes had changed. Chaos and Order moved.
5.48 seconds.
The amount of time he could use Chaos and Order without using up his lifespan had increased. Liam had reached his last resort. Any mistake would cost him unknown amounts of his lifespan. It was a result only achievable by the fourth petal’s blooming, which drastically increased his resistance to Chaos and Order’s effects. This was his only option. The only abilities he had never managed to use properly.
The sea underneath his soul got darker than the void around his body, while the cracks in the sky glowed with blinding golden light. The two colors enveloped his soul. Time seemed to have lost its meaning. Dread filled Liam’s heart. He had been foolish.
Chaos and Order were concepts that transcended spacetime completely. He had only managed to track how long he could use them because he was only using an infinitesimal fraction of them. Now that he tried to move a more significant portion, he lost track of time completely. An instant and eternity were the same. None of them held any meaning.
Liam cursed under his breath. There was no going back now. He needed to commit to what he had done, or his lifespan would be used up for no reason. He wished for his Will to be bathed in the two primordial concepts. The Primordial Essence moved alongside them, joining Order naturally. Once he felt he could no longer go on, he stopped. Chaos and Order immediately stopped, as if he were no longer worthy of commanding them. The cracks in the sky and the black sea returned to their original colors. Liam evaluated his situation.
I lost four months.
It was a big loss, especially considering that it was after the fourth petal’s blooming. He now had one year and eight months left. It was a short amount of time, even from a human standpoint. Liam let out a breath before teleporting to Cinzolia Fortress’ council room. Luweth was there, as were all the others belonging to his inner circle. The Vampire had gathered them up as if he already knew what Liam would do. Cassandra and Arthur carried the most worried gazes. Olivia and David sat at Arthur’s sides while Mikhail, Eiko, and Alexander were on the opposite side of the table. Andrew and Armaan supported Albert. Wang Lei and Yichen stood in a corner as usual. Everyone’s eyes turned to Liam. Cassandra stood up almost at the same time as Arthur. She spoke.
“I knew something had happened the moment we were teleported back. What is going on?”
Her voice was shaking. Liam sighed. He could feel her emotions; she was deathly afraid. She was afraid he would have more bad news about himself, which he unfortunately did. He could tell that she was at a breaking point. She couldn’t bear any more pain. His words died in his throat as he hesitated. That only made her expression be filled with despair. She sat back down, looking as if she had aged ten years.
With a complex expression, Liam started to speak.
“…I’m sorry, everyone. It’s great to see all of you, but there’s something I need to say,” Everyone’s expressions hardened as he spoke, “It’s about my sudden rise in power. It can… Change me.”
Before he could continue, Arthur interrupted him.
“Change you in what way?”
“Probably the same way that Isolation makes you feel. Distant. Unfeeling. Indifferent.”
The atmosphere in the room changed. Liam felt everyone’s emotions in real-time. Some had blank stares that hid the sudden worry eating away at them from within, while others displayed their desperation openly. Alexander spoke.
“…That’s a problem alright. Not only will it make your priorities change, it will also affect humanity as a whole. Your power already makes you hard to relate to. It’s only due to Luweth’s work that you are hailed and worshipped as humanity’s leading figure. If that image is broken, people won’t have any reason to go on.”
Humanity was ravaged by hopelessness and myriad negative emotions. This had only begun to change once they won against the Drakkhan. Liam and Luweth were the ones most responsible for this change. If the Emperor of Humanity could no longer be its shining star, everything would fall apart.