Darian slid down the hill, his blood slick arms cool in the night air. Darkness still dominated the sky, but the scent of morning accented the air, driving Darian’s feet faster. He fled the fort for reasons he wasn’t sure of himself. He just knew he needed to get away, find a place to calm his scattered thoughts. What about Fria? He’d left her in the care of a stranger. But he wasn’t confident he could control himself. His hunger was sated, but for how long? And now that he’d had his fill, the thought of drinking lesser blood disgusted him. He could still taste the sweetness on his tongue, feel the heat in his throat.
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Enemies Defeated
Valmier Lv. 16
Bonus - Rival’s Companion killed: + 50 Class XP
[Skeletons Lv. 1-4] x22
[Humans Lv. 3-6] x4
Class XP gained: 268
[Class Level 7 Reached]
Progress to Class Lv. 8 (84/300)
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He ignored the notification for now, stopping as he leapt over a stream. Where do I go? He was too far from the ruined temple to make it there before sunrise. The idea of returning to the fort entered his mind, but he rejected it. He'd seen the burning coffin near the gate, the signs of battle. And he'd caught a whiff of Carver's scent in the air. If he was at the fort, Jorg was most likely with him. They probably wouldn't do anything to harm Fria, but Darian was a different story. No, he couldn't return there, at least not yet. But I have to find somewhere, and soon. With his map open he decided to return to the cave Fria had discovered. It connected to the fort, but he hoped he could find a dark place within to not only rest, but to think.
It didn’t take long for him to arrive at the cave. The bones of its skeletal guards scattered the ground, but Zan was nowhere to be seen.
“Zan!” Darian called to no response. Where could the wolf have gone?
But he didn’t have time to think about it. The canopy above lit up, the first breath of morning sun teasing the branches. He sprinted into the cave, listening for signs of movement. When he was certain nothing awaited him, he pushed deeper inside. He crept along in the dark until he met one of the side paths that he knew went nowhere. It was far from perfect, but the spot would have to do.
He pressed his back to the stone and slid down, a flickering torch outside the tunnel sending dancing shadows across the ground. Alone and in silence, he fought off the sleep trying to claim him. His heart still thrummed with power, the fresh blood coursing through his veins electrifying. But what have I done? He’d killed people now, and there was no going back from that.
Focusing on it, he expected to feel disgust at his actions. He’d had to kill plenty since he came to this world, but never humans. Turning his blade against monsters was just what he had to do. And yet, when he thought about the men he killed, he felt nothing. I had to do it. He’d already decided back when he first met Valmier that he would never be anyone’s prisoner. And they would have most likely killed Fria. No, he didn’t regret killing them. They’d given him no choice. They were still people. But they weren’t innocent. But does that give me the right to kill them?
Then he remembered the way he killed them.
After fully giving into his hunger, the battle became a blur. But he remembered fragments—terrified faces, screams as his fangs met flesh, the relief of his thirst being quenched. But it didn’t make him feel sick like he expected. If anything, thinking about the slaughter sent a satisfied rumble through his stomach. What’s wrong with me? He wasn’t happy about what’d he’d done, but he also felt no shame in it. Numbness crept in as he cradled his head in his hands.
I killed someone. He repeated it to himself over and over, but he felt no response.
“I killed someone.” The sound of his own voice echoed. But even admitting out loud what’d he’d done did not stir his heart.
Maybe it wasn’t only his body that changed, but his soul? He’d experienced plenty so far that would have shattered the old Darian. But maybe he was always like this. He’d spent so much of his life tucked away, did he even really know who he was? What was it that I even wanted from life? His cancer had robbed him of any goal besides survival, but there was something he wanted to do, wasn’t there? Some dream that kept him going through all the hard days and nights. A goal that pushed him on for ten years.
But nothing came to mind.
He slumped against the wall. He’d killed four men, tore their guts and throats out and drank his fill. Anyone who saw that would rightly call him a monster. And I almost did that to Fria. Thinking about her sent a cold pang through his chest. What would she think of him now?
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In the end, he leaned his head against the wall and welcomed sleep. Perhaps when he woke his thoughts would make more sense. Until then, he was thankful for the oblivion of slumber.
***
Darian woke slowly, his eyes fluttering open. He rose and worked his way back through the cave, listening for the rattle of bone. When he emerged, he checked his HP, finding that he’d almost made a full recovery. The battles of the previous night played through his mind, one after another. Yet he still felt no sorrow at killing those men.
What do I do now? He wanted to find Fria and ensure she was safe. But he had no idea where to start searching, or if finding her was even a good idea. He’d been so close to tearing into her, and she’d seen it. He’d pushed her hand away, his hunger overwhelming. The thought of facing her frightened him, and he began aimlessly walking into the forest.
He didn’t get far before he heard something rushing through the underbrush. He’d left his enchanted sword behind when he fled the fort, and so he pulled a lesser blade from his inventory. Dropping into a low stance, Darian readied himself to face the charging beast.
“Zan?” Darian cocked his head to the side as the massive wolf slid to a halt, his nose twitching.
As soon as Zan saw him, he reared back and howled. The sound startled Darian, and he stumbled back, his foot catching a root. As he went to rise, Zan pushed him down, his rough tongue lapping at Darian’s cheek.
“Where were you?” he asked, pushing the wolf off him.
Zan barked and nudged Darian’s hand. He pet the wolf while he peered into the darkness.
It was then that he heard the footsteps approaching, and he realized. “Fria.”
She limped into the starlight, her fur armor gone, replaced by a leather vest and a thick wool shirt. She smiled when she saw him.
“Good work Zan,” she said, stepping closer. “I’ll have to thank that pigheaded paladin for healing me. Never would have found you so fast otherwise.”
Darian backed away. Though it was covered, he could still smell her wound. “I…” the words caught in his throat.
Zan padded over to her, and she scratched him between the ears. “The alchemist, Gustan, he told me what you did.”
Darian couldn’t look at her. He could only imagine how the scene was described.
“And he told me you ran after you killed them.” She took another step. “Why did you run?”
He finally looked up at her, expecting disgust to paint her features. But she just looked concerned. “I was afraid,” Darian admitted. “I almost hurt you.”
“But you didn’t.” She was close now. “And what you did to those men—”
“I’m a monster.” He didn’t want to admit it, but it was true. “Not for killing them, that for good or ill I don’t regret. But I tore them apart. Drank their blood as they screamed.”
Fria just stood looking at him a while, Zan squatting by her side. “And?”
Darian blinked.
“Would gutting them with your sword or burning them with your spells have been better?”
“But I lost myself to the hunger. I'm not sure can I be trusted to resist it again. Not after what I did.” Darian gritted his teeth, his chest suddenly tight.
“Twice now you’ve overcome it and both for my sake.” She cupped her hands together. “You told me you’re a thing called a vampire, a creature that’s considered a monster back in the world you come from?”
“Yes.”
“But no one, not Jorg or the undead have heard of something like you. Do you know what that means?”
Darian shook his head. “What are you saying?”
“You might be the only vampire in this world. And that means the only person who gets to decide if vampires are monsters is you. You and your actions.” She smiled. “You’ve protected me, saved that fool Carver, and even if it was only by circumstance, you saved Gustan. And now you’re helping stop a necromancer that would see my home burn. That doesn’t sound very monstrous to me.”
Darian opened his mouth to protest but Fria hushed him with a stern glance. “And those men forced you to kill them. You were beaten and tired, and you already lost so much blood…Yes you killed them brutally, but did you enjoy it? Did you revel in their slaughter? If you didn't, then I don't think you should start calling yourself a monster.”
“But I enjoyed draining them,” Darian said, taking a back step to lean against a tree. “And my body still hungers. What will happen the next time I run across humans? Will I be able to control my thirst?”
“What, do I not count?” She smirked. “You’re not human anymore, Darian. You need to accept that. But not being human doesn’t make you a monster. You can learn to control your thirst, I know you can.”
Darian shook his head. “Why have so much faith in me? We only met a short while ago. What gives you such confidence? Why even risk yourself for me?”
She looked to the ground. “Do you remember the man I told you about, my father’s friend who was half demon? Well, his father was a demon of rage. That meant Feydrian had a bit of a temper. Father told me when Feydrian was younger even the slightest of things would set him off. But when I met him, he was the calmest person I ever knew.” She looked up, her eyes and Darian’s matching. “He fought against his nature and won. That means you can too. You are you, not whatever monster you’ve conjured up in that thick head. You can control yourself. Hells, you’re doing it right now. And as for why I'm risking myself? Well, I couldn't save Feydrian or my father. But I can still help you. And for me, that's enough."
Darian swallowed, his mouth dry. He wasn’t sure what to say. “Okay.”
Fria crossed her arms over her chest, a sly smile playing on her lips. “We should head back to Gustan and the others. They’re making plans on destroying the next Nether Gate.”
Darian pulled himself from the tree, her words just now registering. “What do you mean others?”