Unfortunately, the Dok has proven less than useful to him. While he did assist in the creation of the hand - mainly by creating a steam engine both small and strong enough to support it - he did not possess any additional information. Though he seemed perplexed by the sudden malfunction that Sunshen suffered when...when he was in the rain. Sunshen decided not to reveal more, even if he desperately wanted to confide in someone.

With nothing to do and the first party he was supposed to attend in two days, Sunshen wandered around the rebellion grounds aimlessly. His indecision felt deeper and deeper with every step, as if his lack of action was slowly shutting down all his possible paths, leaving only the one he dreaded the most.

He arrived back at his apartment, disappointed and desperate.

He twisted his arm gently off and put it on the table. He was still as useless as he always was, just under the protection of a different master. Maybe he should embrace the helplessness. Maybe he was fated to be nothing more than a piece on someone's board. He was born without an arm and his grip on things had always suffered for it.

The metal of the hand on the table reflected the lights in the room.

Whether he wanted or not, Herner did give him...well, a hand. He did help him escape the situation he was in prior. Maybe Sunshen just did not word his wish properly before.

Maybe for once, Sunshen should clearly express his intention, at least to himself.

Informant? Not what he wanted, beneath him. Part of the rebellion? That did not sound right anymore either. He did want to change the world for the better. Wanted to help. To be a person worth looking up to, revered and honored - for a good reason.

The wind outside howled as it gently pressed against the glass panes. Small drops of water splashed against the window, as water started raining somewhere up in the fog.

Clouds. At least that is what was written. Big lumps of air and water droplets, flying and moving, changing and falling. Everlasting, ever present, ever out of reach.

Sunshen walked over to the giant window and opened it. He had no intention to try to jump, he already knew he would not, and he did not really want to anymore.

He let the little droplets splash on his skin and clothes, refreshing his skin. They seemed completely unaffected from the fog, even though they came off it. The little mist stuck in the water getting burned out by the niatra light. Sizzling.

Sunshen knew what he had wanted to become, as well as what he undoubtedly became. From the innocent naivety to guilty conscious, riddled with questions, lacking answers.

He was not the same man, as the one that looked upon the engineering marvel of Herner some time ago. Not the same man Magnus disapproved of. Not the same man that fell in love with Tatiana. So quickly he had changed, so quickly he let the world around him mold him to what it needed. Molded him so much he lost his shape. Lost all hope.

Sunshen had enough of it. He would try, at least once. Try with all he could. Try to achieve exactly what he wanted, no matter how difficult it may seem.

He wanted to change the world and he had not lost the intention to do so, but the world would only be the end. There were places to begin.

The rebellion perhaps? Surely there were people better suited for the leading role in all of this. Nataniel, or even Percy would make more trustworthy leaders. Maybe even Sunshen. The lack of action towards the fog from the mayor's office was a concern as well. A lot of the propaganda Herner so loved to utter around was lost on Sunshen. He could see the empty words and threats they carried, so he did not really need to dethrone any of them, as long as they would cooperate.

But before he could start with anything, he would have to do the one thing Herner forbid him to do - gather information.

But first, he had a meeting to attend.

----------------------------------------

His right arm could not stop quivering, as Sunshen took on the image of the gate again. The dark purple fog moved and bashed at the light, turning to smoke or running from the righteous fire. But Sunshen well remembered the touch of the mist. He watched the blackened ends of his fingers, while the horrific memories flooded through his brain.

There was evil right out of the gate and not the mythical kind either. This evil was real, it touched him once already. It was incredibly dangerous. How could Herner send him there again? Was he not useful? Did he not require him to spy on the mayor? Was he useless even when...

His train of thought disappeared when a hand bumped his arm.

Naheila was standing beside him, her arm extended to his shoulder. Sunshen nervously turned to her and she nodded. It seemed that at least she understood his distress.

The other people around were similarly troubled, hauling the stock into the cart. As if they had heard about it, as if they knew the danger personally. Even when none ever ventured into the fog.

Maybe the difference was in origin. At least that was the only think Sunshen could think of. These men were lower-born. At least some knew of their relatives dying to faulty niatra's.

Sunshen did not know better at first, but even he accepted the grim reality fairly quick. Now, he could not understand how someone can look at the wall of malevolence before them and laugh.

"You should tell them something." Naheila whispered to Sunshen, clearly still hiding the fact she could talk from the others.

Sunshen agreed. Based on Herner's words, he was the captain of this expedition, and those that would come after. He needed to solidify his position as much as he could have.

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"Bert!" Sunshen yelled for his third-in-command.

A man dressed in dark leather, his hair cut short and beard shaved walked out of the huge crowd.

"Aye, cap?"

"Gather the men, I will have to tell them what this is about."

"I have already introduced them to the situation, they know fairly well."

"Thank you, but I feel I need to tell myself. I am supposed to be the captain after all." Sunshen replied, unsure of himself.

"Cap I-" Bert motioned him closer and dialed his voice down. "I do not mean to undermine your authority, but are you sure? You are not exactly the spitting image of a leader right now. Your hands are shaking, your voice is wavering. You are new to this. I can help. That is why yiu brought me, that is why I accepted."

Sunshen nodded with a sigh. It wasn't right, that was obvious, but he couldn't pretend like he knew what he was doing anyway. Bert was experienced, survived things that most did not. And even if he never spoke like it, he saw Bert as a friend. When he came to him with the need of a helping hand, Bert did not hesitate either.

Naheila seemed unhappy with his choice though, scoffing.

Bert walked around the men, talking with each for a minute, leaving them with a happier expression than what they had before. It seemed a good choice to leave this part of leadership to him. Sunshen had enough trouble convincing himself to not run from his responsibility.

The men prepared.

"Not a good choice. Weak choice." She said between gritted teeth.

"Probably." Sunshen replied. He had no intention to debate the legitimacy of his decision. Although he agreed with Naheila. He was a weakling from the start after all.

Packed and ready, the horses started to move. As the dark fog around washed over them and the gate behind them disappeared in a wall of darkness. Sunshen felt his heart quicken. His breath was sudden and rough and his hands started shaking.

"Everything alright boss?" One of the man asked.

"Seems so." Sunshen replied, deliberately misunderstanding the question.

The man decided not to pursue the matter further. Rather opting to watch the swiveling darkness before them.

It was the same road as before, at least Sunshen thought so. Not that he could see any point of reference, other than the sameness of the uneven stones. But that much had to do.

He watched the vines move about in the dark corners their light couldn't illuminate quite enough. He could not help the images of that night flash through his mind. The strength of their hold, the sharpness of the thorns, the touch of the void.

A cold wind flew about them, making their light dangle faster. The moving light felt almost ironic to Sunshen. As if his inner turmoil was not enough, the world always seemed to echo an almost fated terror.

As if called by Sunshen's thoughts, hounds somewhere far away started howling. At the sound of the wicked canine yelp, Sunshen's body froze, his muscles flexed, his head buzzed, his stomach threatened to overturn itself.

When he was grounded by a hand again.

Naheila stood behind him, holding his shoulder, her expression surprisingly empathetic.

"They are far. Not on our scent." she told him. "As long as we hear them, we have nothing to fear."

"Alright." Sunshen said. The last remark almost uprooted all the sudden comfort he felt from her, but he managed to calm at least a little.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Yes." Naheila said in a tone that contradicted her statement.

"How did you get here?"

"I climbed onto the cart."

"You know that is not what I meant."

Naheila sighed and put her hands over the railing.

"I think that for the same reason you did." she replied.

"For the better days, as Herner calls it?"

She eyed him, unamused with his joke.

"...for your family?" Sunshen replied. The irony in what he unanswered reaching him only after he did so. The dangerous voyage almost made him forget...almost...

Another distant howl returned his focus to the moment.

"Desperation." she replied.

Sunshen did not have to answer. He might not have named it that on any other day, but Naheila was right. He was certainly desperate. Looking back at his life. Sunshen might have been desperate throughout all of it.

"What were you desperate for?" Sunshen asked, as much for distraction from his own reasons as for curiosity for Naheilas.

She did not reply, instead her gaze locked into the fog. But she was not watching anything in particular, that much was obvious. She was thinking. Rewinding a part of her memory.

He waited there next to her for a while. Waiting for her to reply, but the time moved on and Sunshen was not as stupid as to not recognize that she would not be willing to share that memory. He decided to leave her there, in her thoughts. Not for her. The silence was too deafening for him at the moment.

"I think that is the reason for everybody." Naheila started again. "I don't know about...Herner. But Percy and Nataniel? You really only need to look at them to see it. There is something. A high ranking official like Percy? Why would somebody so well off join us? And Nataniel? A bishop? The head of our church? Not even them. All of these men as well." She pointed at the man on the giant cart. "Even they are desperate. They know the danger, they still go to it."

"I thought you did not like talking." Sunshen replied.

"I also do not like the fog. And yet, here I am."

"True enough." Sunshen laughed a bit. At that moment he could have sworn that Naheila smiled just a bit, before her eyes widened and her back straightened. Her gaze moved quickly through the fog, focusing on something Sunshen could not quite see.

"Do you hear that?"

"What?"

"The howling?.."

"No. I don't hear it at a-" Than he remembered what she told him before.

Before he managed to shout, he could see a dozen purple eyes lock onto them from the fog.

They were not alone anymore.