“Ah!” I woke up with a start. The last thing I remembered was suffocating at the bottom of the sea. I definitely drowned. Yet here I was as, if nothing happened.

I knew I’d always wake up after being shot, but drowning was a different story altogether. I... died. I wasn’t hit by some mysterious paralyzingly beam. I experienced a real death, but I was alive.

Alive... was I really? No eating, no sleeping. This body of mine didn’t require any such necessities. It didn’t have any bruises either, despite how violently Jack hit me. My body was completely reset.

“Ugh.” I felt sick. This body of mine didn’t belonged to a human. We were no longer living beings. Everybody here were just mannequins masquerading as humans.

A headache drilled my brain... assuming this skull of mine even had a brain. The urge to vomit swirled inside me. I wanted to spill out all my insides just to confirm they existed.

“A-AAAAAAAAAAAH!!!” Nothing felt real anymore. Everything was insane! Nothing made sense! Why was I here!?! Why did I have to go through this shit!? I want out! Let me out!

I couldn't take it anymore. Everything was fucked up. I knew nothing about this place or why I was here. Aliens? Yeah, right. How nice it’d be if I could believe in such a childish theory.

No, the reality of this place was much more grim. It was an eternal prison of torture. It was purgatory at best and hell at worst. Could I really get out by winning this messed up game? I doubted even that.

My thoughts were in disarray. I couldn’t think straight. The drilling headache was killing me. My mind was slipping toward insanity. Ben warned me about this before, but I didn’t care anymore. If madness could liberate me from all this pain, then I’d welcome it with open arms.

BAM

I shot down an easy prey. To ensure the man was unconscious, I delivered an extra shot to his head. Then, I picked up a big rock and brought it over his head. And I smashed. Smashed. Smashed. Over and over, I smashed the man’s skull with all my strength.

I wanted to know. I wanted to confirm. Please. Let these bodies have something normal in them!

Alas, nothing happened. No matter how much I struck the man’s head, no blood poured out. Ha. Haha. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Everything was a lie. Nothing was real anymore. I gave up.

It finally dawned on me why Ben brought up bullying, out of all the possible coping mechanisms. It’s because hollow creatures like us had nothing. Our freedom, memories and even humanity - everything was taken from us. We were left only with violence. Brute, primitive violence. That’s the only way to assert one’s existence in this hell.

“P-Please! Let me go!”

BAM

“Why are you always after me!?”

BAM

They fled from me like cockroaches. I picked the weakest players, especially those who gave entertaining reactions. I hunted them. I murdered them. Each and every cycle, without fail.

“Ha. Haha.” Their anger. They terror. Watching their panic relieved me. It fueled me with a sense of control. It proved I had the power to control things, even in this empty fake world.

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“Ha. Haha.” I stalked them. Chased them. Shot them. Like a broken record, I repeated the same actions without tiring.

Was I enjoying this? No idea. My brain shut down at some point. There was no need to think. Thinking only invited headaches. I allowed my instincts to guide me.

“Ha. Haha.” The dry laughter tried to convince me this was entertaining. Maybe it really was. I didn’t know. I didn’t know anything anymore.

“E-Eh?”A startled voice grabbed my attention. “W-Where am I?! W-What’s going on!?” A teenage girl looked around in confusion.

She was a first-timer. I hadn’t met any so far, but it was easy to tell. Even after all these cycles, I could still recall my confusion upon waking up in this bizarre place. The warm welcome I received from Jack was burned into my memory.

Ha. Haha. This was great. A clueless fresh meat was a rare unicorn. Pushing her buttons will be delightful. I’ll make sure to teach her how things worked around here. Ha. Haha.

“You’re a newbie?” I approached the girl, doing my best to maintain a smile.

“E-Eh?! Newbie?” The girl jumped. “Um, I think I am? I-I’m probably am! Yep! A total freshmen!” Apparently she convinced herself.

“I see. My name’s Hugo. You are?”

“M-Mia, sir! Nice to meet you, sir!” She saluted for some reason. Did I look like a military officer or something? I had a feeling she was misunderstanding something, but I played along.

“At ease, soldier.”

“Y-Yes ,sir!” Mia gave an enthusiastic reply. I couldn’t help but chuckle. She looked completely lost. “M-May I ask what’s going on here? It’s bonkers! Everybody’s running around and like... like shooting each other and stuff!”

“This is an elimination game.”

“Eh? Elimination...?”

“You need to shoot down everybody else and be the last one standing.” That’s right. This was no survival game. The goal wasn’t to stay alive. The only way to get by was via crushing others.

“Oh, so that’s what this thing is for!” She examined the white gun like a curious child. “So this is just a game! Haha, I was sure I was thrown into boot camp for a moment there.” She produced an embarrassed smile. “You’re a real meanie though, playing along like that. I was convinced you’re some top dog officer guy!”

“Is that so.” My face must had been totally worn out to give that kind of impression, not that it mattered. “Well, was fun knowing you.” I raised my gun.

“Eh...?” All color drained from Mia’s smiling face. A priceless expression. Ha. Haha. Did I also look this dumb on my first cycle? I could now understand why Jack enjoyed this so much. Huh, to think the day would come when I'll be in agreement with Jack...

BAM

“A-Ah!” Mia closed her eyes and clumsily shielded herself with her arms. A weak and defenseless greenhorn. I couldn’t ask for a more entertaining prey to mess with. Ha. Haha. This was so... lame.

“Eh...?” Mia timidly opened her eyes.

“BAM.”

“W-WAH!” She jumped and shielded herself again. It took her a while to realize it was just my voice, not a real gunshot.

“Don’t worry.” I lowered my gun. “It was just a joke. Yeah... a joke.” I couldn’t do it. I didn't want to. The idea of becoming a scumbag like Jack disgusted me to the core. I wasn't like that! I just... just...

“Oh man, you’re such a bully!” Mia puffed her cheeks.

“No, I... just...” Guilt ate me up inside. I remembered the suffering and torture I put others through. Disgusting. I wanted to puke.

“Man, I was sure you’ll shoot ol’ little me! You totally had me there for a moment, haha!” Mia continued to drone. “But I'm really glad.”

“Glad...?”

“Yep, because you turned out to be a nice guy. Everybody else looked so scary I couldn't approach them.”

“Heh, is that so.” I smiled at her innocent words. Not a cocky or ridiculing smile. Just a normal, soft smile. When was the last time I genuinely smiled about something positive? She spouted whatever nonsense that came to mind, but her words made me feel like I was saved, like I was forgiven.

“Eh? Why did you turn away?”

“N-No reason. Just making sure nobody is targeting my back.”

“Oooh! As expected from a pro!”

“Haha. Sure. Hahaha.” I couldn't stop the laughter from pouring out. Happy laughter, unlike the broken one I was producing recently. Genuine laughter, mixed with tears of relief.

On the day I met Mia, my soul was salvaged from the bottomless pits of despair.