Part 1
CHAPTER 1
There is beauty in silence. Have you ever ventured into the desolate yet serene environments beyond the taint of human civilisation? The constant cacophony of noise bombards us, the hum of electricity in the walls, the loud arguments of neighbours, the whirr of traffic just out of earshot, all this and more. I have lived for a long time without knowing what silence is, and I am sure most don't. True silence, the absence of noise, akin to a vacuum, where no sound can be made, is both intoxicating and terrifying. On one hand, there is beauty in that state; there are no distractions, only you and your thoughts. On the other, it's you and your thoughts.
To the disciplined mind, it does not matter. They are your thoughts, concepts, memories and scenarios created by your mind, yet they are not you. If you think of robbing a bank, then are you a thief? Not really. It is okay to think of something, including those intrusive thoughts that may creep up on you on bad days, but that does not mean they are you. A human being is far more complex than a few ideas concocted by a tired mind.
Now, that raises the question of what consciousness is. What is the meaning behind this all?
People have contemplated the question since the dawn of time. A simplistic theist approach explains the unexplainable by proverbially burying your head in the sand. Higher powers have created humans to worship, build, destroy, and love. And contemplating the intricacies of existence is above the pay grade of feeble human minds. On those dark and dreary days (like this one), I wish this was true, it removes the burden of those enquiries from me and gives a point to the pointless. Existence is scary, so I understand why some people seek faith as a source of peace and a reason.
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Atheist philosophies argue that the pointlessness of existence is simply because it's fucking pointless. Some say that you should find your meaning, a reason to continue on the constant struggle and suffering that is life. I also see some beauty in this idea: to create meaning out of meaninglessness, stand in the face of suffering, and be resilient. People tell me I need to find meaning; some take it from their family, loved ones, jobs, or interests. None of that sounds appealing, to be honest. And all of this because of particularly land-inclined fish a few hundred million years ago…..sigh.At least, that was how it was back in my world.
So, where am I going with this? Well, nothing makes you contemplate the meaning of existence more than a fresh bout of murderous violence. Letting my freshly conjured blade dissipate, I talk to the room's only other, well-former occupant.
"To be honest Frank, I have no idea where to go from here", I whisper in a hushed tone to the headless corpse sitting mere centimetres from me; the distinctive smell of death and the foul materials are almost overpowering my other senses, but more important matters occupy my mind at this moment.
“I think a conversation this important warrants a face-to-face meeting, heh" I pull the stray head using Frank's few remaining locks of hair and bring him to eye level with me. His expression is forever frozen as one of utter bafflement; his mouth is open, and his tongue is lolling this way and the other with the shaking of my hands. As I stared into his lifeless eyes, an uncomfortable silence enveloped the tiny room I found myself in; the only sound breaking the silence was the constant dripping of blood from the cooling head I held in my hands.
drip…drip….drip…drip….
“This is getting rather awkward Frank, I know we didn’t start on the right foot, but I’m sure we can hit the ground rolling” I chuck the head like a bowling bowl, and it not being one, it does not go very far.
I take careful yet steady steps towards the reinforced metal door of the room that housed me for the last few months. Casting a final gaze on the remains of the incubation pod, the bloody corpse of the researcher I dubbed Frank, I unceremoniously bend the metal like a child playing with playdough, and it makes a horrible shriek that will doubtlessly draw the attention of every living being in the lab. I only take a few moments to admire my inhuman strength before making bloody footsteps outside the tiny room, my naked, rippled body tensed in anticipation. I feel for my demonic power and conjure another ancient and powerful blade. I have fifteen people left to kill.