I didn’t know that the delightfully persistent young Mr. Caine had once again tracked me down until he laid his dainty little hands on the Siren.

The Siren was a one hundred and eighteen pound statue of a model named Kate Moss twisted up in a yoga pose, but it was its value in the gold it was made from that interested me. After all, I had been envisioned as a dragon by my summoner, and to stay in this mortal world I had to be true to that idea.

Or at least a compromise that allowed me to walk about in the form of a rather tall, slender, oh so handsome man.

So much easier to go out in public than a great scaly beast.

Dragons hoarded gold. If I don’t horde, then I wasn’t a dragon. Then I would lose my sometimes tentative grip on being me, Josef Drake. International Bon Vivant and art thief extraordinaire.

I could just buy gold, but it didn’t seem very dragon like. And it just simply wouldn't be as much run.

Even dealing with young Mr. Caine and all the others who had been hired over the years to steal my treasures back were part of a wonderful game. All they had to do was literally lay their hands on my stolen goods to challenge my claim to them.

As for knowing who it was, well, I had tasted his blood in Venice. During an actual sword fight on a rooftop in the rain. I fell down into a canal after he ran me through in a classical villainous supposed death. So cinematastic. And fair was fair, while I cut him and licked the blade, he did shed mine as well before we were done. Neither had been the type to give up easily.

“Hello, my boys and girls! We have the Witch’s blade in the house today! A hundred thousand to whoever takes him out!”

Yes, I know how much he hated that name. Just adding a little spice to today’s encounter. Pity I didn’t have another sword handy.

My voice carried out easily over the plumbing supply warehouse I had made the right bribes to be left unoccupied for the week. In fact, my voice was more than loud enough to let all my minions hear me clearly and begin hunting down the would be hero.

That’s when someone put their boot into the back of my head.

As I tumbled over a few times on my way to the ground, I got a glimpse of the woman in the biker leathers and a look of self satisfaction on her face. After rolling to a stop, I muttered a complaint to the universe. “Oh great, the girlfriend.”

She glared at me as she pulled out a gun and aimed it at me. “I am not his girlfriend, he is my rival.”

I posed while lying down on my side, head resting on one hand and my leg bent up at the knee.

“Really Miss Ichiban? Carrying around that ridiculously oversized handgun and rushing into my lair to save your tiny prince. I do think that someone’s in denial.”

As she raised the gun toward my face and gritted her teeth I decided I wasn’t going to identify as being on the ground but instead as being on my feet and standing behind her.

I had just enough time to start to think about how almost comically short she was before John Pierre came flying across the room at me and Caine was getting all shouty. “Yuki, behind you!”

As I danced back a few steps, letting the French safe cracker fly by, the young lady spun in place in a textbook perfect spinning back kick that connected with nothing but air. As she glared at Caine she raised her handgun and shot at Lillian, the Russian second story person. The shot was well over the blond woman’s head but more than enough to send her scurrying off while Caine nearly hit the floor ducking down with a surprised look on his face.

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I rolled my eyes. “Oh, for… She wasn’t shooting at you Caine. One of my people was about to light you up with a taser. You would think that after working as a team so many times you would trust your woman.”

That was enough to get the young lady to empty her handgun at me while screaming. “I’m not his woman!”

Luckily I had decided I very much liked the idea of being a man standing up on the catwalk up above, rather than a person standing on the floor. So the bullets when into a stack of toilet bowls, shattering them, while Toby, the Brazilian computer expert tried to sneak up on her with a large plunger.

I never did find out what he was planning to do with it since Caine came sprinting across the room and jumped kicked my hacker into a support beam for the catwalk hard enough I could feel the impact on my feet.

Then it was the two little darlings fighting back to back in a constant whirl of kicks and punches, almost perfectly in sync with each other. All of my employees got knocked about until they were laid out in a circle of moans and weak efforts to struggle back to their feet or crawl away.

Then the two of them turned on each other. Face to face. Eye to eye. Breathing heavily in more than just from the exertion from their fight.

I began to clap with a big grin on my face. “That. Was. So. Thrilling. And obviously exciting for you two as well. Why don’t you forget the whole steal back the Siren part and just go get a room?”

The two of them froze. Glanced up at me, then at each other as they both turned bright red. Then they began looking at anything rather than each other.

What? The? Hell?

“Seriously? You two aren't together already? What…? All that passion, your youth?” I gestured my hand at each and them and began to swing them back and forth. “What is wrong with you two, chasing after me when you could be chasing each other around a bedroom?”

I dug out the key card from my jacket and did my best to whip it down at Caine’s head. “The room is paid up for until tomorrow. Go and do things to make the young lady's toes curl up. You twit!”

Caine flinched back from the card as it fluttered down while Ichiban just looked down at the ground. “It’s… It’s not like that. She just keeps chasing me around to try to beat me at my jobs. Just because I won a tournament we were in when we were kids. I didn’t even fight her in it. It was just because she was pissed off because I won with some half assed strip mall martial arts.”

The girl glared up at him. “I did beat you, over and over again until I proved to you that you needed real training. Trying to just power through everyone was going to get you killed.”

He looked at her in shock. “You never told me that?”

She dug her hands into her hair. “I outright told you that a dozen times. Find a real teacher, get some real training.” Then she threw her hands down and glared at him again.

The young idiot looked down and twisted his foot on the ground. “I just thought you were rubbing it in after you shoved me down the stairs and all those other times.”

Ichiban screamed and began pacing back and forth cursing him out in Japanese.

Jean Pierre had pushed himself along far enough to sit up and lead against a crate of pipes. “I think young man that you are missing the point. No woman would pay that much attention to a man that she wasn’t interested in. “Then he threw up his hands defensively as the lady in question shot him a dirty look.

Lillian sat up with a groan. “Don’t put all the blame on the boy. Men can’t read minds. Sit on their laps, knock on their doors wearing nothing under your coat, or even...” She gasped and clutched at her chest. “Talk to them and make your feeling clear. If you don’t risk, you don’t win.”

There was a murmur of groaned agreements from those of my minions still conscious.

Ichiban stomped her foot. “Shut up! This is between me and him.”

The boy stepped over Ivan, the Scottish muscle, and got dangerously within the girl's reach. “Is there a me and you?”

She muttered something at him that ended in “…baka.”

He blinked a few times. “Oh… I would.”

Caine turned to me and held his hand out to the side. The girl hesitantly took it. “We’re taking the Siren.”

I wave my hand nonchalantly. “Take it, I can always steal it back later on. Hopefully when the two of you are distracted. Send me a wedding invite.”

The two of them glanced at each other again and blushed again before heading off. Caine talking about the two of them getting a drink later on while Ichiban gave my room card a regretful look.

I looked down at my minions. “Sorry boys and girls. I’ll pay you your shares out of pocket. But after you all heal up we can try something simple and pedestrian to work up some capital for a real job. Maybe we could try robbing a bank…

Two years later I found a wedding invite on the back of a Rembrandt in a museum that had been bragging about their new security system. I didn’t attend but I did send along a lovely tea set that had once belonged to a queen.

Gold and precious gems were my greatest desires. But getting two lovers together, all the way to the altar. Now that was something a little different to treasure.

Maybe I should have been cupid instead.