"Hey Jeffy, are you crying?"(?)
"Hic*... No... *Hic.. I'm not.. crying..."(Jeff)
"What are you talking about? Look at you face, it's useless to lie now."(?)
"If it's.. *Hic... obvious.. *Hic... then you shouldn't have ask!"(Jeff)
"Nah.... Haaaahh. So why are you crying?"(?)
"You don't have to know..."(Jeff)
"Are you being bullied again?"(?)
"....."(Jeff)
"Well, looks like I'm right... Is there anything I could help you?"(?)
"You don't have to, Sis..."(Jeff)
I know this person... The one who always help me when I'm sad, the one who always praise me, the who always supports me. My beloved sister.
When I was a kid, I always get bullied in school, because of me being an orphan. But my sister always saves me.
"They won't stop even if you told them.."(Jeff)
"So then, how do you feel about them?"(?)
"I hate them... I hate them so much that I want to hurt them... but..."(Jeff)
"But?"(?)
"I'm afraid of hurting others, I don't like hurting people..."(Jeff)
I was always like that, in my mind I want to hurt them, but I couldn't have the courage to do it, because i was afraid.
"Yep... that's right. You shouldn't hurt people hurt people, but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't do anything."(?)
"Then what should I do?"(Jeff)
"Avoid them, don't talk to them , run away from them."(?)
"That just the same as not doing anything!"(Jeff)
"No no, when you avoid them they wouldn't notice you. when you don't talk to them they wouldn't also talk to you, when you run away from them... well... they might chase you...but if you run fast enough they won't catch you!"(?)
"...."(Jeff)
"Haha... I'm sorry if i can't help you enough, but remember my words okay, Jeffy."(?)
"Okay..."(Jeff)
"All I could do for you is comfort you, talk to you, if you want I can let you cry in my lap!"(?)
"Then... I'll take your offer..."(Jeff)
"?"(?)
When I was sad, I would always cry at my sister's lap, until I was satisfied. This always helps me from breaking apart, it was kinda... a mental support for me.
"*Hic, Uuuuhhh,"(Jeff)
"There there, cry all you want, your sister will comfort you... Should I sing you a song?"(?)
"*Hic... shut up, sis..."(Jeff)
"Hahahaha!"(?)
"...no laughing.."(Jeff)
"Jeffy, can you promise me?"(?)
"What is it?"(Jeff)
"Promise me that you'll always live your life to the fullest... and..."(?)
"And?"(Jeff)
"Be always be a good boy.. can you promise me?"(?)
"Okay. I promise."(Jeff)
"Hehehe, that's a good boy!"(?)
"Don't treat me like a dog!"(Jeff)
"Hehehehe, Jeffy is a mama's boy... ah no, it should be sister's boy."(?)
"Nnnghhh, come here!"(Jeff)
"Haha! Can't catch me!"(?)
This was the promise that I could never forget. The promise that I wanted to fulfill... but...
"Sis! Sis!"(Jeff)
"what are you... crying for...Jeffy..."(?)
"I'm sorry... it's my fault.... I'm sorry.. Sis.."(Jeff)
"Come on.. Jeffy.. don't cry... you should... smile you know..."(?)
"What are you talking about!? How can I smile right now!!"(Jeff)
"Hehe, Jeffy... live... your... life... to the... fullest..."(?)
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"No.. No! Sis, please don't close your eyes... please.."(Jeff)
My sister got caught in an accident... because of me. I was careless... and the price was my sister's life.
In the end I couldn't fulfill the the promise i made, I locked myself in my room and cried everyday. My parents tried to persuade me to go out but I didn't do anything. I just never left my room.
To pass my time I would always play at my sister's computer, I would read some light novels or sometimes watch some anime, my sister was the one who influenced me that. But every time I do it, I keep remembering my sister. But I didn't hate it, I actually loved it though it would really make me sad sometimes
After some time, I finally had the courage to go out, I didn't want to just keep hanging on my parents' support, I also need to fulfill my promise.
When I finally decided to go out my parents were very happy, I decided to get a job so that I could also support my family, though I was still a kid at that time. My parents just jokingly accepted my decision, so that I would not be depressed about it, though what happened next, changed my life.
They brought to me to an unfamiliar place, they said that they will interview me there. I really want to slap my past self. I followed their instructions and suddenly I fell unconscious.
When I woke up I was in a small room. I didn't know what to do, I was really afraid.
I still remember the pain and despair that I felt during my time at the lab. The pain of being experimented on. My hatred towards them. The guilt of killing innocent people. The despair of not being able to do anything.
But one time, i tried to escape. I stabbed one of the member of the organization, trying to escape, I failed though. But when I stabbed that person, I felt something inside of me, a tingling sensation spread in my body, I didn't hate it, in fact I actually liked it. It's different from when I hurt the other Test Subjects. When I hurt the Test Subjects I feel guilty, but when I hurt the those persons I feel happy.
And there I finally decide, if I stay weak I'll kept getting hurt. I need to become stronger.
"Hehehe.... If I'm weak, nothing will happen to me. I need to become stronger... Stronger! In order I need to kill, and also torturing them. I'll erase them in this world. I'll tear them to bloody pieces!"(Jeff)
"But don't worry Sis, even if I change, I will always be good boy. That's right... I will keep my promise for you..."(Jeff)
"Why stay sane if you can become strong if you're insane. What does insane means anyway? Heh...I don't care anymore. I just want to dye this place in blood. A kind insane man? Those words doesn't seem to fit together, but I will be the one who is like that. If you're insane that means you're evil? Can't you just be kind at the same time? What the hell... what am I saying right now. I guess I'll make a plan to escape this place, then after that I'll kill all the person in here. Of course, I'll save all the Test Subjects. Yep, this is a good future plan. Good night, myself."(Jeff)
This is the time when i changed, the time I became stronger. I embraced my insanity and accepted it as my own.
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Hey there guys J.Nashiro here, so yeah.... I'm really busy at school, haha.... I mostly use my free time to write my story. So i suggest you check for update once in a while.
Peace!