As I steadily open my eyes I start to sit up. I see the door broken down by people inside the house. I quickly

and quietly lay back down on the couch. My heart beats faster and faster louder and louder; I swear that I

they can hear it. I blink, and there they are staring at me. They know I'm awake. my heart beats even faster. I

try to fake doze but then one of them calls out “we know you're awake give us what we want or else”. I still

try to pretend but my heart still beats faster and faster. It feels like it's going to explode out of my chest. Then

I hear a loud bang that rings through my ears. my head spins. I look down and it's not a small hole, it's not

the size of a bullet, it's a hole the size of my heart. I can’t find my heart there yet it's still beating faster and

faster. It's so painful I didn’t even realize, I'm running banging on doors, on walls, calling out for someone,

anyone to help me though my voice won't cooperate, I plead in silence. The banging isn't helping. I’ve jostled

every surface of the room and nothing has changed. I’ll continue with walking to conserve energy. I don't

know why. I try to make my body move. To do these things, but it won't. It’s catatonic. I wake up in a panic

nearly screaming, it’s not like anyone will hear me.. When I do anything too energy consuming my body

automatically yields. I can learn but I can't speak and I can't communicate for some reason my heart feels

like that is useless. I quietly open my door and head down the stairs. I look over to the counter, I see a plate

with my name on it and I start eating. As I'm eating, I look over to see the other plate has my father's name

on it. I’ve already eaten yet my mind is yelling at me to eat more and I listen and it's strange, all I have to do

is eat enough food for three people. then I'm good for the entire month. It's less about the food and more

about the energy. I could live off sawdust if I wanted! That's why my body can survive for unnatural lengths

without eating (even if it doesn't feel like eating for some reason.) It doesn't care for food though I wish I

would eat more just so I'd be able to speak again, articulate my thoughts, so someone could hear my plight,

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but I know that won’t happen, you don’t get another chance, I've come to terms with it by now. I went back to

my room to read the various books I possess, since reading and learning is the only real thing I can do

anymore. if my heart disparages it, it’s unattainable. Even if said heart is missing from my chest. There is a

person, my therapist, her daughter. She's able to communicate with me a little bit well… Everyone's able to

communicate with me. it's just she's the only one who understands what I'm thinking I look over at the

pictures above the fireplace. There's a picture of me with my therapist. I don't have anyone else's picture up.

due to the fact that everybody else I know except for that therapist and her daughter see me as asinine and

inadequate. It's only thanks to her daughter that my therapist still continues putting up with me. They come to

my house every so often to give me money and food materials To learn. I realized today is the day that my

one and only friend, the therapist's daughter Angela, wanted to take me out to do something. Apparently

she's still in contact with her friends from school. She seems to think that connections are all that useful to

me even though I've lived years without any connections at all but then again it does get lonely just learning.

Just as I finished my thought tangent I heard a knock on the door. I go down and I open it to see my friend

Angela. she laughs and says that I look the same as always Depressed and lonely though I can't really

argue with that. She takes me to her car. As she drives off I look out the window at nature, the only thing she

really takes me to. the only thing I really accept going to. I'm pretty sure the only reason why My heart allows

me to go is because for some reason that area has a lot of raw energy. The energy that my heart needs is

the same type of energy that flows through Angela's Garden in a much more concentrated volume. We arrive

at the get-together And as always we're the first ones to arrive. When I start to get out I see a figure in the

shadows. My heart tells me to send out a pulse of energy with the same energy it needs to survive. that I

need to survive but it always allows me to do this as danger doesn't go away on its own. it seems to go

further into the Shadows. This figure is very powerful and very dangerous. I turned to my friend Angela. She

notices the panic in my face and the worry my aura gives off. Then her jaw drops as I announce go Danger

then she starts running to her car. I see other people start to pull up. They don't get out of their cars just yet

as they don't like me. Even though they're fine with me when Angela's around. I crouched down in my normal

fighting stance. The figure walks out of the Shadows with a grin on his face and I freeze as its if I'm looking in

a mirror. I see myself but they're talking. He proposes a deal that he gives me all the energy he has saved up

and in exchange for all three of us becoming one again. I regained my senses as I could start glaring at him

not trusting anything he says. He raises his hand. He doesn't seem threatening at all but the aura he gives

off speaks of incredible power But my body moves on its own as my heart considers this deal acceptable.

Everybody gets out of their cars as they start to head over Angela's friends are calling me delusional again

calling me a freak. Angela comes over Telling them to cut it out, And the get together of Angela and her

school friends continues. I head to the corner like always As I drift off to sleep I wake up in a white space.

I know something happened as I can feel a different energy Coursing through my veins as my

consciousness is put in a new body and the whiteness goes away. I find myself in a field. I look around and I

see a wide expanse of land that looks like Medieval Times. I know that I am not in my old world. The best

that I can do now is try to find Angela if she is even Here.