Novels2Search
Reformation and Insurgence
Chapter 18 : A Heartfelt Understanding

Chapter 18 : A Heartfelt Understanding

“...”

ReZhui was not having it.

He strongly felt everything had reverted back to when they first started this journey.

.

.

.

It was a long 2 hours before they finally reached the end of the farmlands, arriving straight at the main road that led into the inner regions of DongBu village. Dark yellow strips of wide, harvested crop fields were flowing towards a fading gradient, transitioning into a more familiar reddish green backdrop, followed by regular arrangements of rows of wooden or concrete housing. Between several of these dwellings, shops were established in an alternating pattern. Their long, slim shadows fell on the road in front of them as the sun continued to make its progressing climb up into the slight overcast sky. Overall, It was another mundane morning weather for the populace, which ReZhui felt surprisingly comfortable with now, considering the jarring differences of the inner circles with the outlier slums or the farmlands.

‘Is this how ShiYan identifies this village to be?’

He recollected.

A short few weeks back, ReZhui discerned this place to be one of high alert and precaution. Something that was extremely out of the norm. An unchartered territory like no other. No forests nor mountains could have shook him that way, unlike that alleyway from before. He truly felt terrified at the sight of, what he observed now as, such humbling structures of comfort and security that normal people live their entire livelihoods under. It was…

A short chuckle.

‘Well, I could get used to this.’

He kept that thought for the final time.

Because unfortunately, contrary to the refreshing scenery that gave him a warm welcome back home, a grim and moody atmosphere laid reign over the inside of the carriage, accompanied by the dreadful tranquility of permanent silence. It was unsettling.

Playing it safe and respectful, ReZhui remained in his neutral seating position while recalling several minutes beforehand about Mr Xu and his sister as they retold their unfortunate court trial in his younger days to them. Immediately after the mother finished her side of the story to Eddison, ReZhui could easily sense a sudden shift in the tone of Mr Xu’s expression, breathing deeply under his breath, and that was what brought the silence until the present moment.

Like a vase that was filled to the brim with water, ReZhui could sort of guess that if he did not ease tension right there at once, an uncontrollable flood would possibly later ensue which was not beneficial for all of them, including himself. But, it seemed as though Mr Xu had no intentions of calming down his sealed frustration.

Thus, taking action upon himself, ReZhui knew he had to step in. Firstly, he hesitantly made quick glances at Eddison’s mother, seated opposite him, and it left him troubled inside. Her eyes were unnaturally bleak as she hung her poker face to the side, avoiding contact with Mr Xu. Beside her sat Eddison who helped support his frail mother upwards on the sofa bench they shared. This time with more boldness, ReZhui met his gaze, giving him an anticipated look which Eddison did not overlook so easily. Slowly, Eddison started to feel weak. He unconsciously started to tap his foot and made slight shudders, indirectly cowering in fear of what was to happen next in which Eddison had a blurred insight into what could happen soon.

Of course, this change in his newly revealed nephew did not go unnoticed by Mr Xu who was seated a distance away from the back rest, leaning forwards onto the edge of the sofa. His arms remained stationary on his thighs. Slim hands dangled inward, above his lowered head with his face, unseen and darkened by the shadows.

Cautiously as ReZhui turned around to face him, Mr Xu subtly gritted his teeth, realizing the child’s purpose. He should have spared no more delays or further misunderstandings.

As much as Mr Xu disliked a conversation about the time in which the both of them were at their lowest or any form of useless conversation in general, he also wanted to settle this. Fast and proper.

With that, Mr Xu said his piece, reassuring him.

“I no longer need your consolation, ReZhui.”

“...”

“But I thank you, for your help.”

The words spoken felt like a pat on the head.

“Mr…”

‘No! This is what I wanted in the first place.’

With that, ReZhui halted his main course of action. Seeing Mr Xu’s determined eyes, ReZhui retracted back into his side of the seat, claiming a sense of accomplishment within himself and setting up trust that Mr Xu would do well to resolve.

‘Now…we are now back on track!’

He cheered.

---

“Xiao Tian, are you paying attention to me?” he inquired gently.

Mr Xu steadied his posture, making direct eye contact with her.

“...”

What came next was silence, but that did not last long. Finally, she spoke.

“Dear Brother, are you mad at me…for going against your instructions?”

She faced close to him.

“...”

---

‘What a complicated situation.’ ReZhui thought to himself. For a trip back home, he was pleasantly amazed at how much out of Mr Xu he was learning about. Being someone that ReZhui admired greatly, this other side of him, a weak individuality, was starting to show itself to be more and more apparent as the deeper their story continues. Despite those flaws, ReZhui sincerely respected him.

‘Personally, this makes you seem…more friendlier, Mr Xu. So therefore, I will be cheering you on from the sidelines!’

ReZhui raised an imaginary fist into the air.

---

“Xiao Tian…”

It was an unexpected, feeble voice, soft spoken without a hint of arrogance of an educated scholar that even ReZhui pulled back further in shock. Eddison, on the other hand, clinged tighter to his mother.

“I…I deeply apologize.” Mr Xu.

In a manner that used the professionality of a service worker and feelings of a caring older brother, Mr Xu lowered his head.

However, promptly before his head was bent at a ninety degree angle, the mother jerked forward using all her strength which equated to not much, and brought herself closer towards her brother, stopping him in quick alert.

A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.

As she frantically brandished her panicked hands near his face at first, the mother stuttered a flabbergasted response,

“W-why…?” Her voice sounded with a degree of exasperation.

Her hands shook in panic and fright.

“I-I should be the one. I shouldn’t have gone out to attend that court session. If…They wouldn’t have gotten that far if I were to-”

“That’s where you’re wrong, Xiao Tian!”

“...what, what are you saying, Dear Brother? Isn’t that all false to make me feel better?”

A deep breath in, as he stopped her continuing.

And a low exhale came afterwards.

“Do you still remember the case of little Chen of the Liang family, Xiao Tian? The first murder case of which I was accused of.”

“...”

Recollecting her thoughts, the mother calmed down and carefully picked herself up onto the sofa bench where she gave her level headed reply, messaging her dizzy forehead.

“Why would I ever forget your first ever unjustified accusation, Dear Brother? So yes. Yes I do remember. What of it now?”

“...Well, while I understand it is too late to inform you this late, but after you…I eventually managed to pick myself up again and with the help from some of Father’s remaining loyal friends, which I went to the extreme with precaution to message them, in the end, I successfully proved my innocence. With the help of retired Commander Yu, we were able to forcibly investigate the house of the Liang’s and found a large supply of paint which had large traces of lead contained within them. And with that used as evidence, I was able to reason that little Chen died of lead poisoning and this was further backed by customers of the Liang family, who fall victim to a usage of a new formula of paint that the Liang’s sold, days before my appointment with them. Similar to little Chen, many customers who had registered patients into the other pharmacies, were seen diagnosed with severe cognitive disorders and paralyzed in parts of their limbs. Most commonly, ones with large families of children.

And by the time I was done digging for evidence, their reputation had already fallen apart in some neighborhoods while in others, bad rumors were only circulated. Ultimately, I concluded that my drugs were never the issue and brought up this analysis to the judiciary. This time, I used the proper connections and planned ahead to get a proper judgment which surely worked well in my favor, resulting in my criminal record being burned and the Liang family business was shut down.”

“...”

“...I know it’s hard to digest this so suddenly but I hope this will remove your ‘guilt’, Xiao Tian. Even if there were to be some lingering emotions, at least, I hope the burden is partially relieved.”

And in response, the mother gave him a sharp glare.

“What’s with this empathetic and sullen attitude of yours, Dear Brother? I’d much rather prefer that tone when I talked about that bastard judge,” she replied coldly.

“Is this another one of your self-deprecating phases again?...Listen XiaoTian, I would be lying if I did say I wasn’t mad. This includes even now.”

“So-”

“But, if I were to place myself in your shoes, I could confidently say that whatever you have been through for the past two decades or so, it surely was a tough life out there, wasn’t it? Much harder than my life post-court, I concur..”

“Well…”

“And so, I trust that my little sister has already learned from her past mistakes and has grown up to become a wise lady worthy of the Xu surname. In the end, there is no use in myself being mad at someone’s once ‘self’, that no longer exists.”

“Letting bygones be bygones…Is that what you’re suggesting, Dear brother?”

“Yes, and so regarding my immature emotional display earlier, I want to apologize. For all those times that I could have sent out a search party to find you and bring you back home, I instead thought you were better off gone without me and nearly forgot about you; and for that I apologize. Finally, for all the traumatizing experiences that I naively showcased to you back at that court session, I am sure it would’ve wound you greatly, watching a close family member being beaten to submission like that. Ha…thinking back to it now, I feel…I feel idiotic. Very much so.”

“Dear Brother…I-I,”

Her eyes started to water.

“Huh,” TianXing questioned as she felt tears running down her cheeks, droplets falling onto her bony hands.

“sorry…It’s…sniff…It’s just…sniff…I-I was scared. Back then before I left the household and now, where I lack a single penny to my name, it…sniff…it was frightening. Moreover, now…where I had no choice but to show this pitiful version of me in front of my beloved brother. It hurts to see you get disheartened on my behalf. As much of a failure as I am now, I do not deserve your compassion.”

“NO! No…that’s no what I meant-”

“Despite this, I still remembered the effort you put in to love me. And for all the times I delve back into my self-hatred, you were the one to bring me back into the light of life. You were there for me in the darkest of times; and the fact that you continuously expressed that I am deserving of such affection while I still remained persistent on the thought of otherwise. It makes your efforts wasted, first and foremost. I do not want that to happen. Secondly, I once had the love of my life. While it may seem like a fleeting memory within the back of my head,”

She took out a small silver locket out of her robe.

While dented and covered in grime, it had quite the appealing simplistic design to it, being shaped like an oval and having a small amethyst gem at the bottom end. Small engravings of moons and roses covered the border and the handle that attaches it to the chain is a hook, molded into a curling serpent. Close to that was a lock to open the cover and as she clicked it open, the inside within showed a photograph of miniature size.

Revealing it sparked the attention of everyone in the room. All widened eyes were locked in onto the accessory she held in her hand.

And as they all examined the piece, there displayed a standing young gentleman, with his left arm resting softly on the edge of the grand chair rest; upon which his equally youthful wife graciously sat on; and atop her lap, their 4 year-old child sat obediently still, facing the camera.

For ReZhui, this was the first time he had ever seen such a different style of clothing worn before and in such a medium of camera film as well. He felt exhilarated at these new sights of fashion and technology. The family were all donned heavily grayscale formal suits and gowns, with the husband spotting a bowtie and the wife, a complexly woven frilled collar. Their sleeves were tight and compact while her gown and shoulders were voluptuous and puffy.

He stared at it in deep awe and as expected, he was the only one most amazed by this. Eddison was very clearly the child in the photo and Mr Xu was familiar with this drastic change of culture with his experience of foreign affairs.

But as much as ReZhui wanted to vomit out a bunch of questions to the mother about what he is witnessing here, he knew this was not the right time and so held himself back, remaining silent.

Seated next to him, Mr Xu also felt a sudden influx of questions into his mind, but not for the thoughts ReZhui was curious about. He gripped his fingers tightly in patience.

Witnessing their reactions, TianXing proceeded to lightly brush her fingers across the man’s face in the photo. Her eyes sparkled glistening black marble.

“He also saw me for who I am and I do not want to waste this as well.”

Shifting her gaze to the toddler, she frowned in a contemplative gaze, before turning to face her son.

“And finally you, Eddison, with your grandfather coming close second. It gladdens me to know that you still acknowledge me as your mother…seriously, you’re just like your father. Even with all the sorrow and suffering I shoved upon you…”

“Mother…”

But before Eddison could continue, she gently patted his head aside, coming towards his eye-level.

“And for that, I apologize, Eddison. I know that you will continue to forgive your sorry excuse of a mother, but I need to take some responsibility for what I have done so I will atone for my sins. I do not know how but that’s a certainty and my promise.”

“...”

Eddison could say no word. It felt too overwhelming for the young boy who has not seen his mother act that way in a very long time. It was unsettling and very foreign, but also comforting in a way at the same time. Either way, his mind unfortunately blanked out at that very moment.

“And as for Dear Brother, I want to give you all my thanks again. If you can find the joy within me, then maybe I could too. Yes…I will love myself to the best that I can, Brother, even if it’s possibly too late to change anew.”

She smiled meekly with lethargic glee.

“...”

Mr Xu, while proud with her declaration, gave her a troubled and worried look back, addressing it as soon as she realized this.

“I am glad to hear that, Xiao Tian. But, if you do not mind answering this question, could you tell me if it’s possible to arrange a meeting with your ‘husband’?”

Despite being ready to be faced with such a question, TianXing was still taken aback slightly with that upfront manner of speech and as she was prepared with an answer, the words would not come out, spokened out in minced pieces from the start.

“sorry…”

“...No, don’t be. Let’s try another approach, shall we? Why don’t we start from the beginning, after you depart from here?”

That was when ReZhui intertwined.

“Mr Xu, do you mind sharing why Eddison’s mother left? I-I can see Eddison being curious of the reason as well. Right Eddison?”

A quick and bold nod was what he gave.

“...”

Giving ReZhui quite the furious glare, Mr Xu complied and began his explanation.