Jeffery stood on the edge of the ice, staring into the endless waters below. He always knew this day would come, he’d been preparing but never did he think it’d be so terrifying. If there weren’t so many of his peers around, he’d have pissed himself.

In the middle of the lineup for those making their first dive, was Riptide. He towered over everyone else. If anyone was poised to take on the title of the Big Kahuna, it would be the Big Kahuna’s son himself. The bastard was making eyes at Jeffery’s girl. Of course, she wasn’t his, not yet anyway. He promised he’d confess to her after the first great dive.

Now, he wasn’t so sure that he’d survive to see her again.

“Aww Jeff,” Waves said, nudging him. “Don’t be so worried. We were made for this! Besides, if you freeze up now, Riptide’s gonna snatch Aqua. “

“R-Right!” Jeffery responded, peeking at Aqua. “I-I was b-born into the greatest clan of divers and fishers. There’s no way I would be scared of a little water...”

“That’s the attitude. Oh, we’re starting.”

Before Jeffery could even turn around, the signal was given and dozens of those lined up jumped head first into the water. Of all the things he had to do, why’d he have to go back into the water?

He groaned and leaped in. Holy shit. It was cold but not as bad as he expected. He started swimming, kicking his feet and moving his arms as fast as he could. He gained on them, zipping past more and more of his divingmates. He was faster than them. Holy crap! He was actually faster than them!

Jeffery spotted Waves and gave him a friendly ram, making both of them spiral. Had they not been holding their breaths, they both would have laughed loud enough to wake the fat elder. Who would’ve thought he’d be good at something that killed him in his last life?

His confidence rose as he caught up to Riptide. The bastard’s eyes opened wide. He wished he’d open his big mouth instead and swallow some of the water.

Riptide shook his head and nosedived deeper. What the hell? Jeffery watched as Riptide reached for something in the dark. Oh crap! Jeffery dived deeper and chased after one of the fish Riptide scared away. This was it. This was their goal. Fish.

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The fish was fast but he was faster. The distance that separated them narrowed in seconds. Just a little bit more, he told himself. Just a little bit more! He could taste it already. As he reached out, the fish turned faster than a college student who just heard there was free food being handed out. Its slipperiness would have surprised many others but not him. Jeffery changed direction just as quick and caught the little fishy in his mouth.

He laughed diabolically in his mind as he looked to the others-

Huh?

A second later, he found himself staring at the sky laying on top of a pile of fish. Two men with beards looked down at him both looking stunned at their catch. Jeffery quickly spat the fish out of his mouth and got to his feet.

They’re tall.

They were both speaking a language he didn’t understand. They sent glances his way and continued speaking to each other. No doubt they were wondering what to do with a majestic creature like him. He used to be human too but no longer. Now he was the mighty penguin! Which kind of penguin one might ask? He didn’t know. Maybe if he listened a little more closely when Animal Planet was on he’d have figured it out by now.

The two men suddenly stopped talking and began walking toward him.

Wait… Do people eat penguins? Oh shit oh shit. What do I do now? If they decide I’m one of their catches, they might end up butchering me. Think think think!

That’s when it hit him. He started tapping his flippers against the deck and the two men froze. Tap tap. Tappity tap tap tap. Tap tap tap, tap tap tap tap. They watched him with curious eyes, maybe actually seeing him as something more for the first time.

Tap tap. Tap tap tappity tap.

He quickly snatched the biggest fish he saw and dove back into the ocean.

I’d love to be admired in a zoo but I’ve got a girl waiting for me back home. See ya, suckers!