Some days, I wondered what the end-game was. As soon as I had signed with the Org, I had effectively signed my life away. There could be no return to a normal life, even if they did allow me freedom. Not after everything I had seen or now knew. Demon Hunter wasn’t a career, but something that consumed you until you met your demise in Hell or were driven insane and could no longer function. I considered my fate different, but how true that was could just be delusion.

We sat at the dining room table in silence, eating the food that had arrived. Burgers. They were nice, but part of me still reeled from the day so far. In saying that, it seemed to be dusk already. Jumping back and forth between Hell, I had given up on trying to track time. We had been to the Rodney’s place, the Org, Saloon, and Nightclub. That seemed like a full day, and I was definitely tired.

“Do we have a time for our guest tomorrow?” Rodney broke the silence, his apprehension for the looming Church meeting bigger than the cold air between myself and Wight.

I’d never really fought with my patron before… it was something the pact didn’t really allow. Sure, he had been plenty threatening when he was urging me into action after years of squandering my potential—but the actual implication that he could kill me came out of left field with how cordial and close we had become.

Maybe that was my error. He wasn’t a friendly entity that I could care for and trust, but something greater that was acting this was just because it amused him. I was inconsequential, and once he was freed…

I raised my eyebrow and looked over at the Blank to not leave him too long without an answer. “Early-ish, about ten.”

“Neat,” he said, unconvincingly. “Well, I’m going to turn in, take a break from the shotgun to rest my eyes. Might see if I can get us a lead on Gunther?”

“Perfect.” I gave him a smile, but my heart wasn’t in it, so instead I looked down at the remains of my burger as he left the table. His footsteps went out into the lobby and then up the stairs.

I worked my jaw. Wasn’t like me to be so tongue tied, but it had been a long day and the odd atmosphere had thrown me for a loop. Still, I was the adult in the situation and shouldn’t let things linger.

“Wight, do we need to talk about something?” With some reluctance, I turned in my chair to watch him impassively stare at his own half-eaten burger.

[Yes.]

“Is it something specific that happened today, or…?”

[I am… resigning myself to the fact that one day we will not exist at the same time.]

I nodded slowly at him as he turned to stare me down. An odd thing to say after winding me up about my mortality all day, but perhaps that had been the fuse to this explosive revelation. “It’s always been a fact that I’d die eventually, Wight. Even ignoring the dangerous work we do.”

[It is not just that, Eric.]

He hopped down from the table, leaving the rest of his food.

[We will talk with the David tomorrow, there is much we do not know.]

I nodded, but didn’t reply as he left to go to his room. At first I was waiting for him to tell me about a bad feeling he had, that something big was in our future that might risk both of our existences. That he didn’t even commit to any sort of a slight hint of doom was more worrying than if he had.

The burger was no longer appealing, and I sighed slowly as I stood to put everything into the trash. I considered my brain was just spent from the harsh day, possibly even melted from the nightclub antics and expelling so much of my energy there and in the warehouse.

Perhaps he was right. I was becoming uncontrollable, and he was only the way he was because he was caged. Two powder kegs waiting to blow. The only question was who first, and what we’d take out in the collateral. I didn’t regret how close we had become, or blame either of us for the path we had traveled.

If anyone was at fault for… all of this, it would be the Org. They stole the Wight from Hell, or wherever he was from and plied him as my bound servant despite knowing the potential issues. Then again—the demon that had killed my family was also the start of this whole debacle.

I washed my hands and stared out of the kitchen window into the darkness of the late evening. If thing didn’t happen the way that they did—who would be around to save the world from the machinations of those in Hell? Who was going to supposedly fix Heaven and bring balance to this plane of existence?

If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.

Somehow, I doubted that was even a thing that I was capable of doing. Things seemed to just want to take me on a downward slant and I’d slowly slide into further turmoil and conflict, all the while growing stronger than my body was capable of withstanding. Mentally, I was fine though. I stared at my reflection in the window as if trying to read if I was lying to myself or not.

I didn’t want to know, so I turned away and decided to head to my room instead. Flicked the lights off as I went, plunging the room into darkness, before I head up the staircase and down the walkway. Ironic that the darkness flooded through the path that I took. Also, so very me to consider things in such a melodramatic way. I worked my jaw as I passed by Wight’s door, but continued on to my own.

Light went on and then I closed the door. A night without Pearl here wasn’t the worst thing, but life always felt more vibrant with her nearby. Another thing that was time limited, untenable in the long-term. I couldn’t live happily ever after with a demon, surely? As much as I loved her, we were still worlds apart. My inevitable and impending doom had allowed me to forget about the distant future to enjoy the now while I lived it.

Clothes off, I stripped fully and went into the bathroom. Running a bath would be nice, but after the day I’d had, I didn’t want to risk corruption or exhaustion taking me. Would make all this dramatic noir introspection rather silly if I went and drowned immediately afterwards. Instead, I put on some comfortable shorts and went to the en-suite basin, twisting the taps to fill it. My face could use a wash, even if the rest of me would have to hold until the morning.

The warm water felt uncomfortably abrasive on my face, despite my glares at the mirror revealing nothing visually wrong with my skin. How I survived all the things that I did was a miracle. That was me all over, though.

Amidst all the miserable overtones I was content to labor this evening with, the biggest shadow was the plan of the Mids to bring back some old god from beneath the city. The Org hadn’t found any information or leads yet, to my knowledge, which inevitably meant it would probably end up as my issue to solve. As long as it was something I could put a revolver shot through, that wouldn’t be so bad.

Then why did it make my insides feel heavy?

Plug pulled, I went back into the bedroom and slunk under the covers. Switching the light off and the bedside table lamp on. My phone up. No new messages. Put it down and took my glasses off. Allowed myself to blur the edges of my reality until I needed to sleep. I looked over at the Pearl’s side of the bed. Some truth lay there in her absence.

I wanted out.

A few months of intense combat and trauma, and all I wanted was a normal life. To have a real family and normal existence. I had been able to fill the holes in my heart with the closest approximations. Pearl, Wight, and the Rodney. They were family to me, but only to this crazed version of myself. The meteor of bloodshed and amazing power just primed to hit rock bottom and destroy everything in the fallout.

Hunters didn’t get retirement, but I wasn’t selfless enough to want to save the world if I didn’t have a place in it afterwards. Well, I’d probably do it if it came down to it, if I were honest with myself… but there was a part of me that wanted something more. Org saw me as a tool, as much as Hunters usually saw their pact demons. There was no easy way to break away from them.

Lamp off, I shuffled down into the covers and stared up at the gray ceiling, partially illuminated by the scant moonlight coming in through the window. As much as I was used to being a bit drab, this train of thought was running a lot lower than usual. Some melancholy over events colliding together. A small taste of the end.

Still, with the Church sending their representative over in the morning, things were bound to be more cheery. I understood what Wight was getting at, in part. Last Lantern was something destined, but we only had half the picture. The exact how and where I was supposed to save the mortal plane was out of our reach. We’d been stumbling blindly between different conflicts, using our powers to overcome odds and survive.

Demon god under the city… maybe we had been too blind and thought of it as the one I lived in. What if it wasn’t on the mortal plane to start with… surely they’d need to summon it into being in Hell first? I worked my jaw. The Lowers wasn’t a place with large cities, but that just meant that my search would be easier. After all, I found the Rat God underneath the pigman city - what if these potential gods drew in demons and cities sprung up around the power there?

Shit. I needed to smoke more often; it seemed to make me smarter. Or perhaps the clarity of being away from the Hells had allowed my brain time to breathe.

As I lay here staring at the immutable nothing above me, I didn’t feel the pull of sleep. Perhaps I needed a little walk to sort my nerves out and relax.

I sat up and moved out of bed. Put my belt and revolver on—simply reflex. Hat too, although that was almost a conscious choice. Didn’t want my thoughts bursting out loudly throughout the house when everyone was sleeping. I stepped out of the bedroom and made for the stairs, the carpet soft and comforting beneath my bare feet.

In the lobby, my choice of destination needed to be determined. Oh, no, I was already walking towards the basement and heading down the cold stone stairs. One of the most familiar places to me in my current life, I supposed. Not exactly one with fond memories, but it stood out.

With a smile on my face, I stepped straight over to the teleport platform. Kneeled down by the metal circle and pressed the interface. Didn’t recognize the runes I was inputting, but then again, it wasn’t something I had tried to learn. I seemed to know where I was going, though.

Perhaps I should dress a little warmer for the Hells? Nah, they’d warm me up soon enough.

I blinked. Forgot my glasses, that might be a problem. Still, I wanted to sleep rather than focus.

The portal spooled up and painted the basement in wild colors. With no hesitation, I went and stepped into it.