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Real Life RPG Doesn't Suck
Prologue: Press Start

Prologue: Press Start

(Iori’s POV)

The first thing that came to my mind when I woke up today was: What the fuck?

 The reason? This thing:

You had a good night of sleep! HP and MP are completely restored.

A floating square in front of my face. I simply can’t understand what’s happening here… I look at it for some time, before it vanishes by itself. While confused, I sit on my bed. There is something different about me, I can feel it. What the hell is this, this strange sensation…

(Iori): “It said HP and MP completely restored… an RPG then? So I have something like status-?!”

Suddenly, when I finished my words, something popped up in front of me.

status Name:Hiyuuki Iori(Change)Level1(0/100) HP100MP100 Job:Temple’s Guardian Title:(None) Parameters Strenght10Dexterity10 Vitality10Resistance10 Wisdom10intelligence10

The floating window is like a window of a RPG game. Also, by the name on it, it seems that the character is me. I should feel panicked by this, but sincerely, I don’t… what the hell is wrong with me man…

Also, it showed up when I talked the word status. Let’s try this…

(Iori): “Close status.”

Oh, it vanished when I thought about it. Is this the only function? Let’s try, just by curiosity.

(Iori): “Inventory.”

Another window opened in front of me. It’s the classical window of a RPG used for an inventory, with a lot of empty slots. Also, I can see a model of my body as If I was a character. There are also a lot of slots around my character, forming an enormous square.

The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.

I can see written under these slots things like chest, head, ring, earing, etc.

Are these equipment slots? They surely are, I can see in the slot for my underwear and my pants are occupied by my clothes. I’m used to sleep shirtless, so there’s nothing on my chest slot. There is also an option for quick set’s that I can change as much as I want. Alright, let’s think rationally.

………..

I can’t get to a conclusion… well, I will just accept it and live with it. I’m curious about this, actually. Man, an RPG character chart about me! Also, I have a level, that means that I can level up? Do I get quests? That means that monsters will start showing up around the world like in the novels that I usually read in the internet?

Well, first things first. I should see if this inventory really works. I get up from my bed and look for the bokutõ, a wooden sword that’s common here in Japan. I take it and look at the window. How the hell I will store this thing in my inventory?

I try to shove the bokutõ in the inventory window… it works! Looking at the inventory window, one of the slots is occupied by the icon of a sword that looks like my bokutõ. I touch the icon and a small window shows up above it.

bokutõ Type:Blunt Weapon Damage:10-20 A normal wooden sword that’s a bit worn. Although it’s a bit worn out, it was well treated during its existence, not lagging behind a brand new one.

Good. I touch the icon and drag it. Oh, it’s following my finger’s movement. Alright, let’s see… I drag it to the slot that indicates my right hand. Immediately, the bokutõ shows up on my hand with a quick white light.

………..

Alright, that was way too cool! As I look at the wood sword, I sight, thinking that it would be cool if I could do this with my mind… can I? I try to focus on the icon, and imagine it going to the inventory slot. It immediately vanishes from the slot in my hand and moves to the inventory. The bokutõ in my hand vanishes. Wow…

Alright, this is cool! I’m completely amazed by this! I take some clothes that I’m used to put on and put them on the inventory, including underwear. Of course, it’s one set of clothes. I want to test the set thingy. Like this, I immediately go take a shower.

As I get out from my room, I meet my mom in the corridor. Her hair is a mess, and she’s yawning cutely. My mom is beautiful, around 1,60 meters high, the same height as me. Black hair, straight and long that goes until her waist.

Her face is the classic Japanese beauty with fair white skin that’s extremely smooth. Different from most Japanese woman, my mom has big breasts and large butt, completed with a thin waist, in a perfect hourglass figure.

I’m a bit like her, my face resembles her, although my father came from England, making my face be the mix of a Japanese and a foreigner. That means that I have blue eyes instead of the black of my mom.

Also, my face isn’t like a Japanese man, with a rounder face and youthful look. My face is more chiseled, giving the impression that I’m older than I am. I’m 15 by the way. My hair is also black, like mom’s, but mine goes just below my shoulder line, and isn’t straight. It’s actually a bit messy. Also, my skin is pale, like my mom’s. I’m not much of an outside person, I don’t enjoy exercises very much.

Well, I have been in some fights before, but whatever. My mother, Hiyuuki Kizuna, says:

(Kizuna): “Iori~, take a bath while I make the breakfast.”

(Iori): “Yes mom.”

I say. As I walk to the bathroom, I look at the window that showed up when my mother told me to take a bath.

Quest Type:Basic Quest Mommy's Request Reward:50 EXPTime Limit:00:09:57 Your mom said to you to take a bath. Wash properly!

A quest… I will gain quest as my mom order me around or if I do some trivial thigs that people ask me to do? I don’t like this... well, it’s free EXP anyway. Let’s just take a bath. Today is Sunday, so I will go out to the temple today.

After I end my bath and dry myself, gaining some experience and filling half of my experience bar, I try out the set thing. Choosing the first set option, it ones a small window with slots that corresponds to my equipment slots.

Seeing this, I put the clothes that I took in my room in the slots of the first set, and mentally I chose the option to equip the first set. Immediately, the clothes that I took in my room appear on my body, appearing from nothing. God, this is so useful! I should put my school uniform in my inventory.

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