Bevis woke to the smell of the fire. Her leg felt hot and itchy. Finding her flashlight, she shone it at her leg; the dressing had been changed. The flap of her tent was still open, and a container of painkillers sat next to her water, as did a plate of items that looked like food. Eating quickly, she drank some painkillers. She needed to get herself moving ... groaning she pushed up from the ground, gaining her feet, and left the tent. She slowly moved toward the forest. When a girl needed to go ...

Finding an area, she paused, wondering how she could do this, her leg was sore, making it difficult for her to crouch, but finally, she did it. Biting her lip as she pushed to her feet again. The nightly forest noises made this necessary expedition scarier than she thought it would be, and she was happy to make it back to the camp. Looking around, she noted the fire was nearly out, the tents around the camping area were tightly shut, and the chorus of snoring told her everyone was sleeping. Easing back into the tent, she read through her folder. What tasks were missed by her yesterday after making the fire?

Looking through the list, she sighed, "Chelsea must have gotten to all of these," rubbing her hands over her face, Bevis shook her head, "What am I doing? Why am I trying to prove I'm as good as everyone else?"

Edgy and restless, Bevis made her way toward the river. Finding a log, she gingerly sat, straightening her injured leg. The river rushed past, never ceasing, always moving, never resting. Sometimes she had felt that way during the time she dated Brad. Never able to find her feet.

Why had she changed everything about herself in the first few hours of meeting him?

Was she so lonely that she thought he was her last chance?

Or was she that desperate not to be lonely?

Nearing her mid-thirties with no one of note in her life, and Chelsea didn't count, was she destined to live the rest of her life alone?

Easing to the ground and leaning against the log, Bevis leaned back, looking at the bank of twinkling stars and sighing, "What is wrong with me that no one wants me? Maybe it's me, or it could be the people I'm surrounding myself with," she frowned, as memories of what she had told Mandy the night before ran through her head, "maybe I need to find myself before I can find someone who would like me enough to stay," she whispered, as the quiet and peace of the night wrapped around her pulling at her eyes that slowly closed to a dreamless sleep.

Brightness and a bone-rattling chill woke Bevis; she felt the coolness of the sand beneath her hand and cheek, heard the bird song and rushing water not far from her, wincing as she pushed up into a sitting position, her stiff muscles and joints complaining at the movement. She was going to be sore today. Looking around, she watched a bird drinking next to the river, the tree branches gently moving in the early morning breeze, and she smelt... fresh air and fire. Turning toward the campsite, she spied Jason and Chelsea chatting while busy with the fire and breakfast. She rose to her feet using the log, moving toward the pair.

"Morning," she whispered as she approached the working pair, "sorry I didn't wake in time to help."

Chelsea smiled at her, "We noticed how out of it you were last night," she chuckled, "didn't even stir when Jason changed your dressing," glancing away as she checked the fire, "I was about to raise the alarm when Jason arrived and found you sleeping next to the river."

"Was that a better spot than your tent?" Jason asked, grinning at Bevis.

"I woke last night, and everyone was sleeping ... thanks for the food and painkillers," she sighed, "I couldn't sleep after realising Chelsea had been on her own with our tasks ...sorry about that, Chels," Bevis' brows furrowed as Chelsea refused to meet her gaze, "it was so nice down there and the best place to see the stars ... I guess I fell asleep while watching the beauty of the night."

"Sounds like a title to a song," Chelsea said, chuckling, "if you want to start on some of the other morning tasks, it would be great. Jason and I have the fire and food bit nearly done."

"Sure, thing, Chels," Bevis said, pausing as she moved toward her tent, "is everything okay, Chelsea?"

Chelsea looked surprised and a little startled, "Everything's fine," she said, glancing at Bevis, "why wouldn't it be?"

"You're behaving strangely, and I'm wondering why," Bevis said, "is it something I did? Was it because I didn't help you last night?"

Jason cleared his throat, glancing at Chelsea, "She has a point and needs an answer."

Chelsea stared at him before looking at Bevis, "It is nothing you have done, Bev," she said, pushing to her feet, "you did nothing to raise the level of weirdness I have in the mornings; now... go and do some of the other tasks before the rest of the group wake up."

Bevis stared at her best friend; all the words sounded right, but she was still hiding something; nodding, Bevis moved toward her tent. She would find out what it was before the end of the day.

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Chelsea could feel Jason staring at her, "Don't say a word," she hissed, "I feel bad enough already."

"Then why didn't you say something?" Jason asked, "What could Bevis say or do if you tell her now."

"I'll tell you what will happen," Chelsea said, turning to him, "she will dread the camp tonight, she will be unfocused, and that is more dangerous than a Bevis who is out of her depth."

"Really? She doesn't look like she's out of her depth," Jason said, "she builds a fire just fine."

Chelsea shook her head, "She watched a video the night before we left on how to build a fire," Chelsea sighed as she continued with the fire, "neither of us has a clue what we're doing. If you weren't here, we'd be floundering."

"Huh, you both look like you can handle yourselves in the wild," Jason said, a frown puckering his brow, "who knew."

"You heard the phrase, fake it till you make it?"

"All the time," Jason said, "why?"

"That is what we're doing," Chelsea said, "my goal is to still have a friend with me at the end of the week, and Bevis' goal is to be breathing and fairly uninjured by the end of the week."

"If you two are so clueless, why did she dive into the river to save Jo yesterday?" Jason asked, looking at Chelsea with a confused expression.

"She told me she had a fifty-fifty chance of survival," Chelsea said, "and it would be better if it were her and not you since everyone needed you to get through the week."

"You're kidding," Jason said, watching Chelsea but unsure if she was being serious or not, "tell me that was a joke."

Chelsea shook her head, "I'm worried. I've never seen Bev so closed off like this. It's as if she is hiding every emotion this experience is raising to the surface. Somewhere along the line, she is going to explode and ..." Chelsea inhaled, shaking her head, "Brad might be the catalyst."

"You need to tell her," Jason said, "she has a right to know ..." glancing over his shoulder in Bevis' direction, "if she sees him tonight... and discovers you've known for more than twelve hours you're going to have an issue and she may never trust you again."

"I will tell her," Chelsea said, "I just need to find the right time to do it, maybe when we reach the camp, and I don't have to worry about her throwing herself from the raft on purpose."

"Have either of you tried anything like this before?" Jason asked.

"Rock climbing ..." Chelsea nodded, "indoors ... you know, controlled environment and the like," she sighed, "Bev broke her wrist ... canoeing class, she seemed to be doing really well until it capsized with her strapped inside and nearly drowned," Chelsea inhaled, "in a swimming pool..." she looked at Jason who was trying not to laugh, "I could go on and tell you everything that could possibly happen in the time she dated Brad ..." she shook her head, "it would seem she is suicidal."

"How many things did she try?" Jason asked, returning to the preparation of breakfast, "How long did they date?"

"They were together just over a year," Chelsea murmured, "and she tried everything outdoorsy you could imagine. The thing is, Bev is not that kind of person ... she loves sunsets with a glass of wine, reads ... a lot, writes a lot, can bake some delicious things, makes so many handy items for people and can do gift hampers that no one forgets and talk about forever. But this kind of thing ..." she looked around, "camping, rafting ... making fires ..." she shook her head, "it's not her ... did you know she burnt herself on the first night ... she told no one, not even me. I saw her changing the bandages under her jacket sleeve. If Brad treats her half as shoddy as he did when they were dating ..." Chelsea looked out at the river, "I'm worried the old Bevis will rise and Brad will be no more."

"You think she'd kill him?" Jason asked, worry in his eyes.

"Not her way," Chelsea said, shaking her head, "but he'll probably need to be airlifted for medical attention."

"Why did she date Brad?" Jason asked.

Chelsea stared into the kindling fire, watching the flames begin to take hold of the wood, "I don't know. I've never understood it ... Bev is beautiful, kind, has an infectious joy that others seem to catch like a cold, she's gentle, caring and a good cook."

"Sounds like a catch any man would want," Jason said, watching Bevis move from one task to the next, wincing as she moved over the uneven ground but never stopping to complain or rest, "why aren't there men lining up to date her?"

"She's strong, independent, self-assured," Chelsea said, looking in the direction of Tiffany and Jo's tents, "she will need to be dying before she asks for help, and men don't want that ... they want someone who is constantly needing them, is unable to do anything for themselves and makes them feel like knights of old instead of having someone who can pull her weight in a relationship," Chelsea sighed, "sorry didn't mean to offload like that ... but you did ask the question."

Jason nodded, "You're correct," he nodded, "I'll watch the fire while I finish food prep. I think she needs more help than she wants to admit."

Turning to watch Bevis, Chelsea sighed as her friend lost her footing and fell to the ground, "You're right. I'd better give her a hand before she hurts herself again."

Jason watched Chelsea give Bevis a hand up; the two began to work side by side as her words went over in his head. Brad's account of Bevis was not even close to what Chelsea had told him; her account rang more accurately and in line with what he had seen in the past few days.

Why would Brad spread lies about a girl he chose to date?

Once after taking Brad home, Candy verbally attacked Jason because of his choice of friends. Brad was a colleague, not someone who would be his friend; he didn't make friends. No. That wasn't true, Jason made friends, but they were few and far between and had to be extraordinary people. Besides, with business being so good, when did he have time for anything other than work.

Bevis' words about returning to an empty home resonated with him; perhaps that was why he always went to his parent's house near the lake after every trip. Retired, they were enjoying a sedentary yet active, happy life.

What more could they ask for after having three children and raising them relatively unscathed to adulthood?

But being around them helped him eventually come home to the silence and loneliness of his home. Maybe it was time to change that, but did he want someone like Tiffany, Jo, or the Bevis that Chelsea told him about.

"I will need to figure this out," he whispered, glancing up as the tent doors began to open and the group members slowly emerged, "time to work."