What the hell? Skill?

I can’t believe this.

I tried to get up, but my body felt like lead. Slowly, I managed to sit up somehow.

More importantly, does breathing increase my health? Lets try it again.

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale—

HP: -5/-21

Wow, it does! Yoga rules!

Maybe not.

Life sip? That means…

I looked up and was greeted by a less dense mist. I breathed deeply.

The mist swiftly entered through my nose. Along with the black mist.

My body shuddered, and my vision became clearer.

What? Dammit, I don’t understand anything!

I heard a clanging noise, wiping my confusion away.

Looking at the noise, I saw a shield flying at me. Why is it covered with ice…oh SHIT!

I rolled away, and heard a loud THUNK behind me. So close! I cheated death twice by now.

Turning my head at, I saw a bald King with his back at me, holding the brown draugr up by the neck and sucking out its life. And the draugr’s feet were right at the edge of the hole, its eyes glowing dimmer by the second.

I grabbed the edge of the shield and stood up. It’s surprisingly lighter than it looks. And for some reason, ice is clinging to it. No time to think about it.

Back when I was in middle school, our P.E teacher taught us how to throw a discus. Back then I thought it was a stupid idea to teach us something like that.

Silently thanking him, I spun and sent the shield at the King.

With a hollow BONK, the shield hit right at the back of his head. He let the draugr go. At the same time, the shield which had flipped forward after the hit was caught by it. Raising the shield with two hands, as if preparing to land a proper hit on the King’s head, it took a step back.

You see, even if the King is a battle hardened Scandinavian undead, the brown draugr –having more battle experience than me, I’m sure— is not. It stepped into the hole, and disappeared from my field of view.

Just like that.

It was an honour while it lasted.

The king mused while staring down the hole.

While he looked like he was distracted –probably listening to his imaginary audiences laugh at his splendid sense of humour, I’m sure— I looked around for anything else to throw. Thank luck, I found it.

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He was just three steps away from the hole, by the way.

Being the polite guy I am, I picked up his helmet which he probably dropped during our own little disagreement, and returned it with interest.

With all my strength, I threw it.

He abruptly turned and swatted it away, causing it to fall into the hole. Note to self: Helmets are not good discus throw material.

He then looked at the hole once more, and placed a hand on his head, as if confirming what he saw. By the way, does he even know I’m wearing his gauntlets?

You cost me my helmet.

His voice full of venom, he turned his head at me.

Come forth if you wish to end this quick!

Saying such, he raised his fists.

As a gentleman, I don’t reject any invitation. So I charged at him.

As I approached, he drew his right fist. So I took the same stance as before: right leg forward and all weight on it, blocking with left arm.

His fist met the left gauntlet with a CLANG and using the spin that caused my right fist ploughed into his face.

One step back.

He drew his left fist, and at the same time, I changed the stance accordingly. Another clang, and my left fist drove into his face.

Another step back.

I ignored the notification as there was a life and death matter in my hands that kind of deserved an undivided attention.

The King drew his right fist back, and threw it at me. I raised my left arm to block.

But this time, his right hand grabbed my left arm while his other hand grabbed around my neck.

Doing such, he opened his maw again.

But I had expected this.

You see, I may look the part, but I am no reckless guy. So even if there was a trap in his invitation, I had a plan B. Besides, having seen him falling for my trick the second time and using a trick second time on the brown one as well helped me to be more sure of my plan B. This guy is a muscle head, metaphorically of course.

So, remember when I said that I have yellow belts on Karate and Tae Kwon Do? Well, there was a move that I used on the final match of my yellow belt test. And the move doesn’t belong to either arts. Honestly, I’m not sure which one it belongs to. Best guess: Judo.

I twisted my left arm to grab his armour, while I used my free hand to grab his belt. Then I hoisted a slightly heavy King –armour and all— in the air and slammed his back on the ground.

I saw it on the TV once. A wrestling show. Fits the situation no better, really.

While he was wondering why there was a ceiling in his field of view, I opened my mouth and breathed deeply.

The King’s eye widened, and black mist seeped out of his nose, eyes and ears like tar.

Sip.

I shuddered.

Sip.

Shudder.

Sip.

Shudder.

I don’t know how long I was at it. But at one point, I felt something on my chest. Looking down, I saw a pale gray bony hand with five bony digits.

ENOUGH!!

I found myself thrown back. My hand which had been holding on to a piece of his armor which had broken off thanks to his strength helped me not fall into the hole. Wait, what is that noise? Water rushing?

My ARMOUR!!!

Oh yeah, I still have to deal with this guy before going Mr. Archaeology.

Although I shouldn’t, given the circumstances, I wanted to laugh. Gee, he must be very fond of his armour. What is he, an 8th grader? WoW die hard fan?

Its his fault for not maintaining it. Nice amulet by the way. It glows like your eyes.

He rushed at me with inhuman speed.

Not liking the bad joke, I threw the piece of armor over his head.

He went after it like a dog. And I went after him like a dog catcher.

As he bent down to pick up his piece of bone, I used a move I learned in elementary school. A move that’s guaranteed to work. Cheap and underhanded, complimenting with my personality, if I must add.

I jumped and kicked him in the butt.

Living up to my expectation, he fell on his face and grinded forward.

I picked up the armour piece, stepped onto his back and grabbed the amulet, snapping it from his neck, and ran towards the hole.

As expected, the King was furious.

Just before hearing a big GRAAAAAAAAA…!, I jumped into the hole, grinding the metal part of the gauntlets against the walls of the hole.

As I went down screeching and sparking, I wondered if I’d have really survived if he’d decided to not play around and go all out against me or us from the very beginning of the match.

At one point, my arms gave away into the air and I pierced through the darkness and into the rushing rapids, and before I could gain my bearings, my head hit against a mossy rock and the unknowing consumed me.