Chapter 1: Conspiracy Brewing
“What do you think about aliens?”
Chris asked Josh, probably getting bored of the alien movie we were watching. We were on a marathon run trying to watch the whole trilogy, minus the spin-offs, because you know, they’re never any good. We weren’t really movie buffs or anything. Just bored, but it helped us transition into one of our favorite past times.
“Aliens are so OP. Look at that, they have a mouth in a mouth that shoots out. It’s like if my tongue had a mouth, then I’d be an alien.” Josh said before proceeding to use his tongue to lap the soda in his cup.
The three of us laughed. I followed up by asking, “But if you ate using your tongue where would the food go? Is it also connected to your stomach, or does it have its own stomach?”
Josh took a moment to think, “Dang, man. I didn’t think about it. If it had its own stomach it’d be ironic though.”
Chris nodded, “That’d mean that the tongue was a parasite and the alien was, well, an alien.”
I added, “It’s kind of like our mitochondria.”
Josh laughed, “Okay, that’s going too far. I don’t need to think about biology while on break.”
I countered, “But don’t you think that’s so interesting? Mitochondria didn’t use to be a part of us. They were allowed to stay in agreement to help us generate energy.”
“In other words, a symbiotic relationship,” Chris said a matter-of-factly.
Josh shifted his gaze between the both of us, “Are we nerds?” he questioned.
We all laughed, and I shrugged saying, “Who said studying can’t be fun?”
The three of all laughed again.
There was a brief silence and all of our phones went off.
“What’s up?” I asked Josh who was the first to look at his phone.
Chris took a guess, “It’s probably Derek. He probably caught wind of some suspicious news and wanted to let us know, like always.”
I made a gesture expressing, you’re probably right, and Josh confirmed, “Yup. Right on spot. You know how Derek has been tracking news related to the new Ebola virus spreading in South Africa? Supposedly it was contained, and routes from South Africa to the US were shut down temporarily, but just now, he noticed that a 6-year old child died from a high fever after contracting a yet-to-be identified disease in Santa Monica.”
“That is suspicious,” I said.
Chris also agreed while adding a bit of his own thoughts, “Yeah, what’s the death rate of children dying of an unknown disease nowadays? Though, the Ebola virus incidents in South Africa and whatever this is may not necessarily be connected.”
Our phones vibrated again, and Josh continued reading, “He said there are some strange points, things that you mentioned already Chris, but he also pointed out another thing that stood out to him. The mother apparently committed suicide a few days later.”
Chris and I raised our eyebrows.
“Okay, this is interesting,” I articulated to emphasize my growing excitement.
“He said he’ll tell us more tomorrow at school. The government may be monitoring our texts.”
Chris made an incredulous face, “What’s the point of texting us in the first place then if he’s worried about the government monitoring us?”
We all laughed, but Josh broke out laughter into silence, “Well, what do you think though? What if this is the beginnings of a zombie outbreak?”
“Depends on what class we’re talking about. Is it a class 2 outbreak?” Chris asked, trying to establish a clearer idea of the hypothetical situation we were in.
“How would you know? The beginnings of an outbreak are all the same, right? Would it even reach us before the government contained it? We’re about an hour east of Santa Monica. Not too far, but not too close either.”
Chris shrugged, “Just for kicks, let’s say that it does reach us. That’s at least a class 3 outbreak asking to get out of hand.”
“Well, I’d probably hit you both up and head straight to Alex’s here.” Josh said while looking at me.
“But you know Alex. He’d either be the first to die or end up like one of the main characters in a movie. The ones we think—when is this person going to die?” Chris jested at me, but we all grinned.
“That’s why I’d have to go to Alex’s first. His chances of surviving the initial outbreak of any apocalypse increases significantly if he isn’t alone.”
“And why would that be?” I asked in feigned ignorance.
“You’re too nice,” Chris stated without a second thought, which brought out some more laughter.
When the laughter died down, Josh spoke, “What about you, Chris? What would you do?”
He pointed at me with his thumb and said, “Well, I guess I would also head to Alex’s as well. Even if you went to his house Josh, I doubt you’d be very helpful.”
I laughed while Josh rolled his eyes, “Come on, man. I’d be good to have around. I’d make jokes and take off the stress, you know what I mean?”
I agreed, “That’s actually pretty important.”
But Chris countered, “If it doesn’t make us drop our guard and get us killed.”
I agreed again while chuckling, “Also true.”
Josh rolled his eyes again while shrugging, “Well, whatever. If we can all get together, then I think we’d be set. I’ll even bring my zombie apocalypse guidebook.”
Chris shook his head, “Already memorized it. If you had to bring anything, I’d suggest a light bag with some canned food and water. Also wear something sturdy but flexible for mobility like hiking clothes. Then we could swap those out later for something better. It’s not like we all have Kevlar covers lying around.”
Josh looked into the air as if thinking, “Now that you bring it up… Should I get some? I think I saw some on Craigslist.”
I nodded my head in agreement, “That sounds like a good idea actually.”
“Yeah, great idea,” Chris mocked, “If you find duplicates, Josh, buy some for us and some extras if possible so we can test them.”
Josh narrowed his eyes, “Why do I feel like I’m being mocked?”
“Well, one things for certain,” I said while emptying my glass of sprite, “It’s definitely good to have Chris around. He’ll be our walking guide to how to survive during an outbreak.”
“Shoot, he’ll probably end up writing his own survival book,” Josh added.
“Alex?”
We all turned to the voice that came from behind us and the sound of the front door closing. It was my father.
“Hey, pops! Chris and Josh are here. We’re just watching some movies.”
He nodded and smiled at us as he took of his shoes. “That’s great. Did you guys eat yet? I can make something for you all.”
Chris and Josh both looked at me with expectation in their eyes.
I grinned and replied, “Yes please!”
Josh pumped the air with his fist and whispered, “Yes!”
Chris thanked my father while nudging Josh who also followed up with some thanks. My father was a chef at a Japanese restaurant where he cooked for people as they sat around an open grill. Although our kitchen isn’t as extravagant as his restaurant, the food he dishes out is still delicious to eat. Even though he returns home late at night, more often than not, I bear my hungry so that I can eat his cooking.
But that night was the last time I had his homemade cooking.
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After discussing throughout the night about what we’d do in the initial stages of a class 4 zombie outbreak, the one that led to a world dominated by zombies, we all decided to call it night. Josh asked if he could stay over for the night, but we had school tomorrow and he didn’t prepare for a sleepover, so I tactfully rejected. Chris called him a “wuss” and offered to give him a ride back home. Such a good friend.
Josh lived down the street from me, but for some reason, my neighborhood only has one streetlight for the whole block. I’ve walked down it before in the dark after hanging out at Josh’s, and it’s pretty scary, so I totally understand. Chris lived further away so he drove here. As for me, I didn’t need to go anywhere.
After they left, I prepared for bed and readied myself for the next day. But I couldn’t sleep. I was too excited ruminating over all the possible scenarios, things I would do if something ever did go wrong.
First, if there was ever an outbreak, my reaction would depend on how I found out. Did it suddenly appear in these suburbs without forewarning and my father or older brother got infected first somehow before coming to get me? Sounds a bit cliché though. It could happen though, but the chances are pretty small. I’d say that the outbreak would first have to originate from some lab and somehow manage to pass by containment.
If that happened, the next question would be where is this lab? Is it nearby? I don’t think there’s a lab close by home, so I should catch some wind of it somehow. The further the lab from me, the better, but that doesn’t rule out the chances that the government would try to cover it up. I’ve read it in books.
Some scientists in a government run lab get careless while handling a 100% communicable and 100% deadly disease, and everyone in the country gets screwed over. Then to cover their mistake, as if to say sorry, my bad, let’s pretend this didn’t happen while the rest of the country dies, they try to kill as many witnesses as possible within the containment zone (and did I mention that’s the whole country?).
The government can’t be that stupid, right? Though I’m sure there were cases where the government was able to contain lower class outbreaks. Maybe that’s where their confidence comes from. It all starts the same, but when things go south, and people start wondering if it’s too late, then by that time, it’s probably already too late. Makes for the setting of a good story, but I like to believe in my government. That it’s competent enough to admit wrong when the whole country is at stake.
I don’t think Chris would agree though. He’d probably count on the government trying to pull a stunt like that just because there would be no one in the end of it to keep them accountable, and even if a handful of people did survive, the government wouldn’t. He’d probably laugh at me in that case saying, I told you so! But I wouldn’t be mad. I’d be happy because he’d be prepared when I wasn’t.
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My alarm clock went off. My head was groggy from a lack of sleep. I don’t know when I fell asleep, but it had to be at least past 4. I looked at my clock sitting across from my bed on my desk and rolled off my bed and onto my feet in one fell swoop. Habit pushing me towards the alarm so I could turn it off. It was 7am. Ten minutes to get ready and wake up my father before heading to school.
My father used to be the one waking me up, but somewhere along the way during my middle school years, I started waking up my father instead. It wasn’t bad. I liked it because it gave me a little more responsibility, and waking up on my own would be a useful skill to have when I entered college.
I didn’t really put too much effort into researching different colleges, and I wouldn’t say I was academic crazy, but I did what I could as efficiently as I could, which translated into finish homework in an hour, maybe pull some all-nighters the day before if I had any projects or essays to write, and spend the rest of my time hanging out with the rest of the guys.
The end result was getting accepted to the best school I applied to, which just happened to be UCLA. I didn’t think I was going to get in, but apparently being top 10 among the seniors did give me some suave, even if my school was ranked as one of the lowest schools in the district. Whoop-dee-doo, class of 2017!
Anyway, where am I? I love muscle memory. After years of getting out of my bed, turning off my alarm, changing, taking a piss, brushing my teeth, washing my hair with cold water, and drinking a cup of water, I think I’ve become more efficient than a robot. The best part about it is I can spend my precious thinking resources on other better thoughts, things related to my life and other delusions.
Now that I think about it though, did I flush the toilet? That’s the only bad thing about sub-conscious actions, nothing registers. I’m sure I did, but I’ll check after waking up my father.
“I’m ready,” I said while poking my head into my father’s room.
He was lying on his bed, but I don’t think he was sleeping because as soon as I spoke, he got up. Sometimes, all people need to get out of bed is a little bit of motivation coming from an external stimuli and a sense of responsibility. I should note that for future reference, if I ever get lazy.
On another note, I did flush the toilet.
I patted myself on the back and headed off for school, excited to gather with the rest of the guys and hear the latest conspiracy theories from Derek.