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Raging Storm [Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha AU FanFic]
Chapter 12: Please Forgive Me, I Know Not What I Do

Chapter 12: Please Forgive Me, I Know Not What I Do

Fate pushed her shopping cart down the aisle of the supermarket, listening to Alph's chatter with half an ear. She was dressed in a loose-fitting peach button down over light grey drawstring pants with a relaxed fit. It was a relief to trade her heels in for flats and it felt good to break in the black sandals she'd yet to wear until today. Things had just been so hectic. She took her time picking and discarding meal ideas with a notion that she might invite her boss over for dinner as thanks for… well, more things than she could count.

"So I took my clothes off, painted myself purple, and ran screaming down the halls starkers…"

"Really? That sounds interesting."

Hands on hips, Alph stomped to the front of the cart, forcing Fate to halt. She eyed the distracted blonde, exasperated, "Are you even listening, Fate? I haven't seen you for weeks and your mind is a thousand miles away." The scientist tilted her head, expression concerned, "Hun, is everything all right? Is it your family?"

Fate offered Alph an apologetic smile, "No. Well, yes, but, no."

Sighing, Alph moved back to the side of the cart, tugging it along to resume their progress through the store. "Make up your mind. Which is it?"

"Mother called while I was with my boss."

"Ouch," Alph winced, familiar with how Fate's remaining parent treated her friend.

"She was… displeased that I wasn't on the flight they had booked for sis and myself."

"I'll bet." Curiously, Fate didn't look as upset as Alph thought she might, considering.

"I told her I had a new job with TSAB… A-And N… um, Miss Takamachi overheard her suggesting I use my position for the family…"

Alph slapped her forehead in dismay, "She did not! What did the harpy say?"

"She's not a harpy!" Fate protested, "S-She's actually very nice if you get to know her…"

"And you do?" Alph scoffed, "In one month?"

The blonde was nibbling shyly on her lower lip, making a show of going through a selection of butter and refusing to look at her friend, "Five w-weeks, if you count that Friday…"

Alph gave Fate a narrow-eyed look, "Yea, but still…"

Her long ponytail shimmered as she shook her head, "I mean it, Alph. It's just the nature of her work. I'm seeing it better, from the inside."

"Okay, okay. I just worry for you, you know?"

Fate gave Alph a warm smile, "I know. And I really appreciate your support."

"Wait, so what did the h… er, the Takamachi woman say?"

Fate stooped down suddenly, poking through a selection of pork bones while mumbling something.

"I'm sorry, what now?"

Head ducked so a curtain of hair blocked her warming face from Alph's sight, Fate repeated, "That it t-took her a long time to find me a-and…"

Fascinated, Alph leaned closer, "Aaaand?..." She prompted, wanting to hear the rest.

"Andshewasn'tlettingmego." Fate whispered.

"Slower please, I didn't catch that." The woman had leaned close enough to see around Fate's hair and her interest was piqued. She didn't know anyone could get that red and not faint.

"And she wasn't letting me go, okay?!" Grabbing a pack of broth bones, she stood and tossed it into her cart, meaning to hurry off and away from this too-curious friend.

"Waaaait, wait wait wait," Alph was of a more solid build than Fate and grabbing a hold of the cart's handle, easily prevented Fate's escape.

"You're telling me, the White Devil of TSAB, said that to you? Nah nah nah," she wagged a finger, "Something is not adding up here."

"T-There's nothing to add up," Fate said, irritably pulling her cart free from Alph's grasp, "We just w-work well together, that is all."

"Fate, come on," eyes serious, the scientist did her best to bring Fate back down to reality, "She has to know who your family is, she's obviously using you…"

"She is not!" Sandals slapping an angry rhythm down the frozen section, Fate refused to give her friend's words any credence. Why did everyone think the worst of Nanoha? There had to be something she could do to fix that. It irked her that someone so giving would be seen in such a light. Why couldn't everyone see what she saw?

"She has been nothing but courteous, and she appreciates my talents. The only reason my family came up was because mother called and said all that where she could hear…"

Chasing after the agitated blonde, Alph raised her voice in an attempt to be heard over Fate's tirade, "Fate! Fate! Don't be mad, okay? I'm just looking out for ya." The blonde was tossing things willy-nilly into her cart, wishing for this grocery run to end.

"I have lived my life being a pawn, a tool, something to offer to the highest bidder." Fate spat bitterly, the claws of her fingers digging unseeingly into the pack of noodles in her hand, "I have been slimed over by countless others approved by my own flesh and blood… Do you not think that I would sense the same coming from someone in the very office next to mine?!"

This was far beyond what Alph had anticipated for a reaction. Taking stock of the situation, she approached the angel whose gaze still snapped with anger, cautiously. "Hey, it's okay. I got your message loud and clear, yea?" The usually icy blonde was actually trembling with emotions barely contained.

"It's just… Linith-mama and Lindy-san, we all care for you." Fate struggled to get her emotions in check. They were in the middle of a public area for goodness' sake, and she reminded herself that Alph meant well.

"So does she," Fate finally said plaintively, deflated.

"I see that," Alph soothed, knowing better than to dispute it, "And I'm sure I'll see more. Maybe you can introduce me to her?"

Placing the pack of noodles into her cart with a calm she didn't feel, Fate nodded, "Maybe," she muttered, promising no more.

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She had bid a subdued farewell to Alph, apologising for her outburst. The scientist just pulled her into a tight hug. "See if we can meet up, all right? I want to get to know someone Fate thinks so highly of." And to that, Fate could not say no. She would have flown banners over Mt. Everest extolling Nanoha to the world if she could.

Putting away her groceries, Fate settled in with her new work laptop. It boasted the fastest consumer solid-state drives, a battery life of over eighteen hours and a full-sized keyboard with a number pad. Not the lightest portable workstation, but certainly something to meet the demands of her job.

Unwilling to rest on her laurels, as it were, Fate logged into her TSAB account even though it was a Saturday. Pulling up a list of pending accounts, she picked one at random to go through and familiarise herself with. There were over fifty, and these were only the ones made available to her by Nanoha, the executive true to her word about easing Fate into her role. She didn't want to think how many more were on Nanoha's plate alone.

She sipped on her oversized mug of lemongrass tea, enjoying the soothing scent of the herb permeating the room. She had swapped her pants out for a comfy pair of shorts, but kept her loose top. Curling her legs under her, she set her workstation on the coffee table in front of her, reading glasses perched on her nose.

Still acclimatising to the user-interface, it took Fate almost ten minutes to notice the incoming video call request blinking in the bottom right of her screen. Wondering what was up, she clicked to connect the call, and gulped.

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Nanoha pondered the wisdom of her extended workout session. It had been a week since she'd last been able to grapple anything, but it felt good to work out her frustrations, top of the list being her increasingly difficult to ignore attraction to her beautiful AVP. 'Attraction? Try a full blown crush with all the bells and goddamned whistles,' she scoffed to herself. "And I thought I was done being stupid," she muttered acidly to herself whilst padding into the cool relief of her apartment's interior. But this was no Ginga, and she respected the blonde too much to even try. She wondered if her schedule could handle an extra session per week.

Seven tap outs to three was a decent ratio, all things considered. Her sensei remarked on her focus and ferocity, and it felt good to have the acknowledgement of someone in a place that had no airs, where everyone was just there to improve and learn. Her lips twisted into a wry smirk. Her father would explode if he knew his daughter was sullying herself with 'inferior gaijin arts'. She looked forward to the day when he found out.

She had shrugged out of her Brazilian Jiu Jitsu gi, the top still belted and bunched around her waist to check herself in the mirror. Some bruises were beginning to show around her shoulders and collarbone, a natural side effect of practising the art. Grabbing a bottle of rubbing oil, she settled at her workstation and logged into her company account. May as well go through some things while she worked on her bruises.

Curious to see that someone else was viewing the same folder as her, she chuckled when it showed the account to be TFATE01. She hovered her mouse cursor over the name and right-clicked it, selecting 'Video Call' from the pull-down menu that popped up.

It took a while for her AVP to answer, which Nanoha didn't mind, it was the weekend and she was in no hurry. She dug her oiled thumb firmly into a bruise forming at the base of her neck, ignoring the ache. 'Ah, she noticed.'

Affecting a stern look, she mock-glared at her insubordinate AVP, "Company policy dictates a five day work week. What are you doing in the system, Miss Testarossa?" An impish glint in her eyes gave her away, but she maintained her harsh demeanour, thoroughly enjoying the flummoxed look of her employee. The blonde looked adorable in her home clothes and glasses, and Nanoha belatedly remembered she was dressed in nothing but a sports bra, the top of her gi bunched messily around her midriff. 'Oops.'

Fate felt all the blood in her nervous system thud damply into the suddenly throbbing area between her legs. Gulping again, she did her best to wrap her gibbering mind around the executive's words. An executive who was practically half-naked on her screen, lean body gleaming from oil while she rubbed at a bruise on her neck. The woman's sports bra hugged possessively at the bounty of her shapely chest, and that long torso was made to be worshipped.

She tore said eyes away from the goddess flooding her senses, "Ah, um, w-well, I just wanted to get a head start before next week a-and…" Her mug was held up almost like a shield, a futile attempt to block the tempting body from her view. She couldn't help but take another peek over the rim of her mug, and squirmed a little, feeling herself slide on her seat. It had to be criminal how tempting Nanoha looked.

"W-What are you doing in the system?" Fate threw back desperately, scrambling to get her mind working again after the massive short-circuit that was seeing her boss in such a state of undress. The auburn haired woman gave the blonde a toothy grin and Fate imagined feeling those sharp incisors grazing over her… She buried her face into her mug.

"Making sure my staff doesn't overwork herself in her first month with me." Nanoha leaned closer to emphasise her point, and Fate tried not to get distracted by the Japanese woman's cleavage. Voice serious, the executive continued, "I know Feito-chan feels pressure to prove herself, but you needn't do it all in one month. Leave it for next week." She smiled, and Fate was unable to understand how someone could be so sweet and sexy at the same time.

"Oh? And how are you going to stop me?" Fate asked archly, unable to resist toying with that inferno that was her boss.

A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

"Like this," Nanoha moved her mouse, and with a few clicks, locked Fate out of the system until Monday morning. This also served to kill the video call, a smugly smirking goddess was the last thing Fate saw before the call ended.

Mouth agape, Fate grabbed her phone and punched Nanoha's name in her contact list.

"Nyahaha!"

"I can't believe you've done that!" This only earned the blonde another laugh, "Nanoha-chan doesn't play fair."

"I don't," the Japanese woman readily agreed, connecting her phone to the apartment's bluetooth sound system which freed her up to move around her condo.

"Devils never play fair," she pointed out smugly as she stripped out of her sweat-soaked gear.

Fate heard the rustle of cloth and the sound of a shower being run. Her imagination ran wild and she slipped a hand under her glasses, covering her eyes to groan silently. 'Devils are too good at torture,' she decided.

"Angels will have their vengeance," she finally declared.

"Promises, promises," the executive dismissed airily, "I know your sort, all bark and no bite."

"I'll show you bite," Fate threatened, unknowingly causing her boss to shiver. 'Time for another cold shower.'

"You'll need to, as my AVP," Nanoha remarked on a more serious note. 'That's it, keep it professional.'

"I shall sharpen my teeth," Fate assured the executive, and Nanoha reached out one calloused hand to turn her tap all the way to the blue side.

Cradling the phone in the crook of one shoulder, Fate wandered over into her kitchen to look through her cupboards, standing for a long moment before her open fridge to try and cool off after Nanoha's assault on her senses. The executive sounded like she was in a good mood, and so the blonde took the plunge, "Actually, I was meaning to ask…" Fate's voice echoed in the tiled confines of the executive's bathroom.

"Mmm?" Nanoha made a sound of encouragement for Fate to continue, she had stuck her head under her rain shower, biting back a gasp as the cool water hit her overheated body.

"Might I invite a friend for lunch tomorrow? She knows Erio and Caro."

"Sure, Feito-chan, invite anyone you would like." Nanoha's voice was a tad muffled as she lathered up her heavy fall of auburn hair.

The blonde bit her lip, "A-And, would you like to come over for dinner, maybe a few Saturdays from today? Just as a thank you…"

"Absolutely," the smile in Nanoha's voice was evident, and Fate felt a flutter in her chest, far removed from the visceral, physical magnetism of the other woman.

"It won't be anything elaborate," Fate warned, her own smile threatening to split her face in two.

"I will like anything Feito-chan makes."

"I'll hold you to that when I serve you wriggling tentacles and kicking frog's legs…" 'Hold me,' both women thought simultaneously.

Nanoha's richly deep laugh echoed in the shower and wrapped warmly around Fate, "At least I'll know it's fresh."

Pulling out various ingredients, Fate began filling a large pot with water, a constant smile tugging at her lips. She would need multiple attempts if she wanted to practise her planned meal properly. The sounds from Nanoha's shower felt homely and Fate was loath to end the call if the executive didn't do so first. It almost felt as if they were in the same apartment together.

"Ouch." Bundling her conditioned hair up, Nanoha winced at a pull in her neck.

"Everything all right?" Fate's concern was evident through the speakers and it warmed the executive still in the midst of her cold shower.

"Just one of the matches I had to tap out from. I think I pulled something."

"Mmm, take it easy tomorrow, then. I don't want you making it worse." Nanoha heard muted plops of items being dropped into water, the click of a stove being turned on shortly after.

A part of Nanoha pricked slightly, the woman used to being her own person and taking orders from no one. But that part was quickly subsumed by the care in the blonde's voice. It felt so different, in a good way, to have someone worrying over her for once.

"I'll be good, if I get to have whatever it is you're making," She imagined the blonde's glasses fogging up while she busied herself over the stove, and wished she could see it in person.

"I'll be cooking extra; I know your appetite," Fate teased.

"A fed boss is a happy boss." Nanoha intoned sagely.

"I'm lucky my boss is so easy to please," Fate quipped while washing some vegetables before soaking them in cold water. "Do I get a bonus if you avoid contracting food poisoning?"

"You get a bonus for giving a damn," the auburn haired woman stated quietly. Her shower had been turned off, the executive's alto coming through with crystal clarity. Fate's busy hands stilled at the raw sincerity in Nanoha's voice.

"O-Of course I give a damn, Nanoha… I… I like you."

Fate could hear the quiet drip-dripping of water as the executive stood silent in her bathroom.

"I like you too, Feito-chan. I'll see you tomorrow. Have a good Saturday."

The AI system muted the call, alerted by Nanoha's turn of speech.

End call, my Master?

"End call."

Yes, my Master. Ending call. Testarossa, Fate, at one thirty-six, PM.

Nanoha buried her face in the large fluffy towel she had pulled from the bathroom rail. That was close. That was too damned close. It was good that Fate was inviting an extra person tomorrow. She needed more people between herself and the blonde, before she did something that she'd regret for the rest of her pathetic life.

Fate eyed her phone, showing the name of the last person she had called. The executive had sounded odd, almost detached. Distant, even. She worried if she had said something wrong, or overstepped her bounds without meaning to.

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Nanoha was setting the table on her patio when she heard the familiar vim of Fate's Honda. Right on schedule.

"Unlock the back door, five minutes."

Yes, my Master. Back door unlocked, five minutes.

Fate rubbed the palms of her hands over the black cropped exercise leggings she had on, suddenly nervous. She reminded herself this was her boss, who wasn't obligated to always be in a good mood, and she should absolutely not think of the woman as anything more than a friend. Straightening her equally black tank, she patted her braid, gave herself a firm nod in her rear view mirror and left her car.

Letting herself in, she removed her bright yellow sneakers and headed further into the now-familiar apartment. It seemed empty, though the kitchen looked recently used, and she could smell coffee and toast. "Nanoha-chan?" She called, wondering where the executive may have gone.

"Out here, Feito-chan." Following the woman's warm alto, Fate opened the door leading out to the seaside front and felt her vaunted willpower lie down in utter defeat.

The Japanese woman was in a white sleeveless mesh tank, the ends tied to a knot just under her bust line. It was completely see-through and revealed a white sports bra underneath. A dark blue pair of lycra shorts rode low on her hips, hugging her body like a second skin and revealing the executive's washboard abs to good effect. Her auburn hair had been piled up into a messy up-do that left her face framed in soft waves and the blonde felt her hands twitch at the temptation to tuck the delicate strands behind shell pink ears.

"Morning," Nanoha smiled, glancing over for just a split second before gesturing to a seat, "I forgot to ask if you'd had breakfast, so I made something simple."

"Morning, and no, I hadn't. Thank you." Seating herself, she shook her head in mild wonder, "This is your version of simple?"

"Just being a good host," Nanoha smiled politely, positioning her chair at an angle to Fate so they wouldn't bump elbows. Avocado on wholemeal toast took pride of place, a sprinkle of white sesame seeds over the slices offering an added taste profile and mouth feel to the common snack. Half-boiled eggs sat beside the plated toast, their caps already cracked open. They still steamed in the morning air, and Nanoha indicated the white pepper and light soy condiments meant to go with the eggs.

A choice of coffee or juice rounded off the meal and the executive urged Fate to eat while everything was still warm. As she ate silently, the blonde eyed her host out of the corner of one eye. Something felt off, akin to the distance she had heard in the woman's voice at the end of their call the day before.

Chewing thoughtfully, she went over their call once more, wondering what may have set the woman off. Had she been too presumptuous? Too clingy? With a start, she realised that Nanoha had been meeting her outside of their work environment more times than with anyone else she could see in the past month. Oh gods, was she being a Ginga? She noted the executive's formal politeness, not unlike how she had interacted with that lavender-haired hussy.

Sucking in a shuddering breath at the sudden pain in her chest, Fate's head fell as she tried to blink away the moisture threatening to flood her eyes. The toast tasted like cardboard in her mouth and she blindly reached for her glass of juice to try and waylay the sob that wanted to escape from her too tight throat.

Nanoha had clamped her jaw shut at the sight of the blonde when she had walked out onto the patio. The morning sun lit the angel in warm gold, caressing the pale beauty and causing a marked weakness in the executive's knees. Her hand shook a little as she laid the plate of toast before the woman, Nanoha allowing herself only a split second to look, else she knew she would be lost. Black contrasted too well with the blonde's ethereal colouring and the way her leggings cupped her shapely rear had Nanoha retreating back into the refuge of prime numbers.

Knowing that even the slightest accidental touch would be too much, the auburn-haired woman did her best to keep a modicum of distance between them at the table. Everything seemed to be going smoothly, Nanoha had yet to jump the Tempting Fate and they were being cordial with one another.

That is, until the blonde fell silent for longer than expected. Daring to glance over, Nanoha saw slim shoulders shaking, her blonde head bowed enough that the executive was unable to see Fate's face. Frowning slightly, Nanoha forgot her breakfast and, with great hesitation, placed a tentative hand on Fate's shoulder.

"Feito-chan?"

Hastily dashing the moisture out of her eyes, Fate shook her head and gave Nanoha a smile that was meant to reassure. "Something got in my eye," she lied blatantly. The smile never reached the blonde's eyes, those windows into her soul speaking of such misery and despair that Nanoha couldn't ignore her overwhelming need to make the sadness go away.

Having no words, the auburn-haired woman firmly told herself, 'Just for a minute,' and shifted her chair close enough to allow her to pull the slim woman into her arms. "I don't think so," she whispered, wrapping the blonde tightly to herself, one hand lifting to press Fate's head to her shoulder.

Fate's misery grew. She was imposing herself on the executive who was just being her kind self, and now taking advantage of their friendship to cling to her even more. And cling she did. She flung her arms around Nanoha's middle and sobbed into her warm shoulder, whispering, "I'm sorry," over and over.

A profound realisation hit Nanoha at that moment. Fate's pain was her pain, and she would do everything in her power to take that pain away. "Shh, Feito-chan, it's okay. Why are you sorry? You didn't do anything."

Shuddering and shaking, Fate seemed inconsolable at first. At one point, she even tried to pull herself out of Nanoha's arms, but the executive was too strong. "No, Feito-chan," the woman's alto was so gentle, it made the hurt even worse. "I want to help. Let me help. Please."

Exhausted and wrung out, Fate gave up struggling, her crying subsiding to the occasional hiccough and sniffle. "Can you talk?" Nanoha asked softly, and felt the blonde nod. Pulling back a little, she took a serviette and began drying the woman's face. Tears clung to her lashes and her face was a splotchy mess. She had never looked more beautiful to Nanoha than in that very moment in time.

Eyes filled with guilt, and yet more tears, Fate was unable to meet Nanoha's concerned gaze. The executive was considering a list of whom she had to kill when Fate mumbled, "I took advantage of you."

Perplexed, Nanoha found her plans for homicide derailed and she ducked her head, trying to get Fate to look at her. "How so?" Giving up, she cupped the blonde's chin, forcing her to meet her eyes. Expression twisted in agony, Fate desperately tried not to see the disappointment in Nanoha's eyes. But the hand, so gentle but firm, kept her prisoner. Warm azure, shadowed with concern, gazed into her own.

"I… I keep clinging to you, a-and taking up your time, and I kn-know you're just being nice, like with Ginga…." Fate blurted, eyes filling once more as hot tears trekked down her face, face crumbling in abject misery.

Feeling as if she had been kicked by a horse, Nanoha's mouth fell open at Fate's tearful confession. 'She thinks she's like Ginga?! I'm such a fucking heel.'

The blonde was entering another crying jag and Nanoha quickly pulled her back into a tight hug. "No, no, Feito-chan, shh. That's not true at all." Pressing her lips to the blonde's temple, she rocked the shuddering woman in her arms. "Listen, please, just stop and listen." The feel of Nanoha's lips helped calm Fate and the blonde did her best to swallow her sobs.

Carefully pulling back, Nanoha cupped the blonde's face in both hands, azure eyes boring into Fate's beautiful crimson ones. "Feito-chan, is as opposite from Ginga as is possible. All right? You are not taking advantage of me. Not one bit." Sighing, her thumbs brushed over high cheekbones and she drew Fate closer, pressing her lips to the blonde's forehead.

Pulling back to again hold the blonde's now confused eyes, her lips tugged helplessly up into a smile meant only for the precious person in her hands. "I'm sorry. I distanced myself from you, true." Fate wanted to weep, but then Nanoha continued, "It's because I like Feito-chan too much." It was the executive's turn to cast her eyes to one side, the admission more than she had ever wanted to reveal to the blonde.

'Too much? She likes me too much?' The blonde sat, thunderstruck, the words playing over and over in her head. Feeling the constricting bands around her heart loosen, she lifted a shaking hand to cup the auburn haired beauty's own cheek, urging the woman to look at her. "I like Nanoha-chan too much, too," she whispered.

Her own eyes grew misty and Nanoha shook her head, revelling in the woman's touch regardless, "Feito-chan doesn't understand. I feel too hard, too much, it scares people away."

Growing bolder, the blonde's other hand lifted to tuck those silken locks behind Nanoha's ear like she had wanted to before. "The only thing I fear… would be you hating me."

Resting her forehead against Fate's, Nanoha held Fate's eyes, "That would be impossible," the executive asserted, the words set in stone for eternity. Her voice dipped to a whispered husk, "But I have never felt this much, before."

Heart thundering, Fate slowly slipped her hand down, resting it right over the executive's heart, feeling the same thundering rhythm right under soft velvet skin. The woman's deep ocean eyes were still clouded over with emotions, even… fear. "I… feel more for Nanoha-chan every day." She admitted, cheeks hot under Nanoha's hands that she felt trembling at her words.

Eyes dropping to pink lips positioned so close to their own, both women struggled to withdraw from the warm cocoon of the other's presence, their soft admissions too much to handle.

They had time, Nanoha decided, to explore whatever this was. "The toast is all cold, Feito-chan."

With an awkward laugh, they separated, "M-My fault," Fate attempted to dry the tears still clinging to her lashes, pausing when her hand was clasped warmly in Nanoha's, "I'm not blameless." Finding herself getting lost in the blonde's crimson regard, the executive left momentarily to get a damp cloth for the woman. The urge to just sink into Fate's regard and never surface was getting impossible to ignore.

They resumed having their now-cold breakfast. Neither chose to make note of how often their elbows brushed while they dined. Something seismic had shifted between the two, and the knowledge that they both liked the other was going to have to be something they addressed. For now however, they were content to smile secret smiles to the other, relishing the company of the other without question.